I took in all the scents. One, sweat and something disgusting, two, soot, three a sickening sweet cologne, more sweat. Four… How many were there? I prayed for strength and took in more scents.
I swore they would wish they’d never lain eyes on her when I found them. I finished at seven. Angry tears blurred my vision. Anger that was aimed towards myself and anger that was aimed towards them.
I let go of his head and the guy fell to the floor.
My body shook.
“What did you do?” the other one yelled.
“I had to see what you saw in order to know what happened, he will be okay. Give him my apologies, please.”
His partner just stared at me and then nodded.
“Thank you, I’m in your debt, whatever you need, just let me know.” I spoke softly as a stray tear rolled down my cheek.
He was speechless and I pushed myself from the floor and went to find out if Constance was here and if I could see Elena. My head spun from all the info I’d gathered. Bile rose up in my throat as a nurse wanted to help me.
I crouched and concentrated on making this sickening feeling in my gut disappear.
“Are you okay?”
“Don’t.” I looked up at an old nurse. “Where is Constance?”
“She’s with the Princess. Let me just help you. What you did back there drained all your strength. You need to sit down.”
“No, I need to see her!”
She led me to the reception and gave me a glass filled with juice. I wanted to chuck it back at her because she wasn’t listening, but I didn’t. My throat felt like the desert, so I took a sip instead.
“Where is she?” I spoke as I finished the last drop. I could barely contain my emotions and my voice was barely audible.
“Blake, the doctors are still busy with her. Please, let them do their job.”
I nodded and pinched my eyes hoping it would make me feel better. I hadn’t slept much the past four months since I woke up that day to find her missing.
The elevator door opened up. “Blake.” I heard my mother’s voice.
She flung her arms around my neck. “We came as soon as we heard. Have you seen her?” She stared at me and I shook my head.
“I’m sorry Son. I wish I could spare you from this. Who found her?” my father asked.
“A couple that went for a jog this morning. She was close to the border. We need to get Matt here, she… she was …” I couldn’t say it. I took a deep breath as my mom gasped.
“Who, Blake?” My father said through clenched teeth.
“I don’t know. Their scent isn’t familiar.”
“Their?” my mother asked with tears in her own eyes. “How many?”
I shook my head. “I got eleven, but two belonged to the couple that found her, the others belonged to two doctors.”
She cupped her mouth as tears lingered in her eyes. “More than half a dozen.”
“Fucking bastards,” my father said. “I’ll get a hold of Matt.”
I nodded and watched my father walk back to the elevator.
When it opened up, Queen Margerite walked out, barely acknowledging my father and ran straight towards us.
“They found her?” she asked and my mother nodded.
“Where is she, can we see her?”
“The doctors are still busy with her.” I didn’t want to listen to how my mother was going to explain all of this to the Queen.
I rested my back against the reception desk with my arms folded. I didn’t have to make up scenarios anymore. I could fill in the missing details of why her heart had pounded like that. I saw images of men with no faces taking turns.
They would fucking die, I swore it, even if it was the last thing I did, and I promised to make it as painful as possible for as long as I could.
I felt her hand on my arm. I looked up at Queen Margerite who had tears in her eyes. “I’m so sorry.”
“Blake.” I heard Emanual’s voice coming from the direction I’d come previously. King Helmut was next to him.
Emanual had never given up on the search either. He’d saved my life more than a couple of times near the Creepers.
I was drained. I couldn’t stay strong anymore and I hid my face with my one hand. My body shook as the tears just flowed. I hadn’t been there to protect her, failed to do my duties as her dragon too many times.
His arms grabbed a hold of my body. “It’s not your fault. Don’t ever think that. You tried to find her, and I’ll testify to that.”
I wiped my tears and so much anger crept into my gut – anger I hadn’t felt for the past four months.
“What—” King Helmut wanted to ask.
“Don’t, please. Don’t ask me what happened. I can’t.”
“She is safe now, Blake,” Emanual said as a nurse came to take us back to the waiting room.
I could still hear Queen Margerite giving her husband the news in detail. He grunted too and cussed a couple of times.
I grabbed the nearest nurse’s arm. “When Constance gets out, can you please just tell her that I’m waiting?”
“I think she already knows that.” The nurse smiled.
I cringed as I entered the waiting room and found the couple that had found her still sitting on the chairs. The dragon didn’t look good but at least he was awake.
“I’m so sorry. I had to do that. Your rider wouldn’t have been able to handle it.”
“It’s okay, as long as it showed you that we didn’t hurt her, you can do whatever you bloody like.”
“Felix?” his partner said.
“At least I can say the Rubicon was in my head. That is what that was, right? You left me with a mother of a headache.” His one hand touched his head with his pinky in the air.
“I had to know. Once again, I’m so sorry.”
“Is she going to be okay?” his partner asked.
“She will be… eventually.”
“Did what we think really happen to her?”
I nodded. “One thing I know is that when I find them, they will experience hell.”
PAIN CAME FIRST, though it was better than before. I opened my eyes. I was in the hospital and everything that had happened flashed through my mind. I found Constance’s face right next to me.
I jolted up. I couldn’t be here. I couldn’t.
“You are safe, Elena. Calm down.”
“No, I shouldn’t be here.” No one else besides Constance was here. Why should they be? I’d killed Blake and run away. I started to move, wanting to get off the bed, but my body still ached. They didn’t even want to take the pain away.
“Elena, calm down, you are safe. No one is going to hurt you.”
“They will!” I yelled. Adrenaline washed through my entire body, making my heart beat so fast.
“Who will?”
“The Council, for what I have done. I have to get out of here.” I squirmed and remembered that Blake was her nephew. My eyes found hers.
They pulled down at the corners the same with her smile. Eyebrows knitted together and tears lingered in her beautiful eyes. Her eyes had the ability to make you calm and she almost shared the same ability that Blake used to.
I started to cry with her hands still firmly on both my shoulders. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to.” I spoke through sobs. It was so loud and I didn’t want to let anyone know I was here.
“Calm down, please. You are safe. And I swear the Council won’t lay a finger on you.”
“No, they are going to punish me!” I yelled like a deranged lunatic. “They’ve been waiting for something like this, and will take their pound of flesh for what I have done. How can you still be here?”
A tear rolled over her cheek and she nodded to someone behind me.
I turned around and saw a male nurse, one I didn’t even notice enter my room, taking out a needle from the IV.
My head started to feel drowsy.
“It’s going to be okay, Elena. You need to rest.”
No
, they can’t keep me here.
“No, no, I have to leave.” I started whimpering as she stroked my head softly and I could feel her pushing me softly back down on the bed.
My head felt heavy, I was so tired.
I had to leave.
SHE HAD BEEN out for two days after Constance gave her something to calm her down. What Constance said didn’t make much sense. She was scared. Thinking that the Council was going to punish her, but for what? I could think of a couple of things, but how was I going to make her feel safe when she didn’t even trust me? I’d been so mean to her before. She didn’t know this side of me and I didn’t know how to show her this side without scaring her any further.
Matt came the day after they found her, he took statements from the people who found her and took samples while she slept. I had to give consent, which was so wrong. They treated her like she was my property now. I hated that. Matt was still waiting for my statement, but I refused to leave her side.
Discovering that she was the Princess, well, it was something we all thought Matt knew by now but he’d been on a difficult case with no knowledge of what was going on in Paegeia. They had to pull him out of his case for this. Still, he came and he’d stayed with us for the past three days.
When I found her, it felt as if I could breathe again. Even though she looked skinny, bruised up, and manhandled. It made me feel sick again but I held it down. The fact was that she was here where I could see her. Tears welled up in my eyes again and I didn’t care what she felt toward me, I had to feel if she was real.
I touched her cheek softly and rested my head close to hers. You are going to be fine, I promise, I told her wordlessly.
I’d stayed next to her bed for the past forty-eight hours. I had to be there when she woke up. I could never leave her side again and I would find a way to make sure she knew it wasn’t some stupid spell either. I didn’t know how I was going to fix that, and I only had myself to thank.
“Blake.” My mom entered. Sammy and Becky were sleeping, it was early and all of us had stayed at the hospital. None of them wanted to leave her side. It was as if she had found a small private Council that was never going to let her out of their sight again.
“Matt really needs to speak to you.”
“Mom.”
“Blake, please. It’s the only way he can try to find them.”
I nodded and left with her.
I found him inside the waiting room with my father. He looked up as I entered. “I promise this will only take a few seconds.”
“It’s fine, just take my statement.” I started telling him everything, all the senses I got from the couple that found her. He scribbled everything down and when I started describing the smells in detail he stopped at two and just stared at me.
“You are not writing anything.” I sounded angry.
“How many assaulted her, Blake?”
“Seven.”
He took a deep breath and I could see that he was really starting to get how all of us were feeling.
He wrote again as I spoke and I was thankful when he was finally done. He put his hand on my arm. “I promise you, I won’t rest until I find each and every single one of these fuckers that did this to her.”
“You will do nothing. That is my job, you hear?”
His eyes grew as I made that very clear to him, but he nodded. “Deal.”
Sammy’s sobs entered the hospital and I ran out to see what was going on. I found Becky’s arms around her. “She’ll be fine, she’s going to be fine.”
“She’s so angry. Why is she pushing us away?” Sammy cried.
“Shhhh, calm down. She’s going to be fine.”
“She’s awake?” I asked and they nodded.
“Blake, maybe you shouldn’t…”
“Don’t tell me what to do, Becky,” I said and could hear faint cries coming from inside her room. I opened the door.
A couple of minutes earlier.
THE NEXT TIME I woke up, Constance wasn’t in my room but Sammy and Becky’s chairs were really close to the bed. Sammy was sleeping with her head on my bed. What was she doing here?
The curtains were closed but I could tell it was daylight.
Becky was sleeping in her chair with her head resting on her hand.
I turned my body sideways to face them both and the movement woke Sammy. She lifted up her head.
“Elena,” she whispered softly but her lower jaw trembled and her eyes glistened. “You’re awake.” She smiled as a tear rolled over her cheek. “Where were you, we searched everywhere. Do you know how scared I was?”
I started to cry. “You shouldn’t be here. After what I did, I don’t deserve your friendship.”
“Elena!” Becky woke up. She stood up, bent over and just hugged me.
“Don’t, please.”
“Don’t tell me what to do. Where the hell were you? You know how worried all of us were, not to mention—”
“Just leave, please.” I cut her off.
“Are you insane? We are not going to leave you, ever again. That trip was stupid. We never should have gone.”
Tears flowed over my cheeks.
“Just go, please. Arianna was right. I’m poison. I don’t want you guys to get hurt, please, just go.”
“We are not going and you are not poisonous, okay?” Becky cupped my face. “Arianna is a bitch, Elena.”
“Dammit!” I yelled. “What is wrong with you?” I stared at both of them. “I killed him and nothing will ever bring him back, Becky.”
“I know you still miss him, Elena, but that wasn’t your fault. Okay?”
“No it was. Just go.”
“No!” she yelled back with angry tears too. “I’m not going to leave you, not ever again.”
I cried and she hugged me again. “We should’ve never left that weekend. Dammit Elena, why did you run?”
“Why? You know why. The Council was waiting for me to fuck up and that was a major fuck up.”
“What was?” Sammy asked.
“Don’t, please, Sammy. I can’t do this with you right now. You should be angry and not be here.”
“Elena, what are you talking about? You’re starting to freak me out. Please, just stop yelling and speak to me!” Sammy yelled back.
I was back in the Twilight Zone. They pretended like I hadn’t done anything wrong.
I composed myself. “Just go, I don’t want you here, go!” I yelled at both of them louder this time, as I jumped from the bed and start pushing them toward the door.
My body was stiff and I stumbled a few times. The pain was gone, though. I shoved their hands from me as they tried to help, and pushed them toward the door again.
I couldn’t handle their friendliness, caring, whatever it was they did best. I just couldn’t. I didn’t deserve it.
“Elena, calm down!” Becky yelled.
“No, go!”
Constance rushed into the room.
“It’s best if you both go.” She got hold of both my arms and pulled me away from Becky and Sammy.
Both girls just stared at me, watching me in pity.
“Please, girls. Just go.” Constance tried again
Sammy started to cry and left with Becky on her heels.
“Elena, calm down. They are your friends. They missed you and they want to be close to you. Heaven knows you need everyone now.”
I shook my head again. “I don’t. They will die, like he did. I can’t let them die too.” Why didn’t they get this?
“Elena.” Constance tilted her head to the left slightly and squinted softly. “Who are you talking about?”
“What is wrong with all of you?” I sobbed.
The door opened and Billy walked in. They’d found me, they’d found me! I grabbed Constance and hid behind her.
“Elena?”
“What is he doing here? Get him out. Just get him out, please.”
“Elena, calm down, please,” he said. His voice sounded different, kinder and sof
ter.
I looked past Constance. Saw his figure standing there. He was tired, looked different, and then I saw his eyes.
It wasn’t dark pools of mud staring at me. They were peacock blue.
I shook my head as I stared at him. “No, this can’t be,” I said to Constance. It wasn’t him. I saw him lying on the bedroom floor. His blood had been everywhere. He was dead. I realized what this was. I had finally gotten my wish, but how had my friends gotten here, and Constance? It didn’t make sense. I looked at Constance again. “This isn’t real, is it?” It barely came out and I felt like crying again. I wanted my mom. If I was dead I wanted her now.
“Shhhh.” Constance’s arms wrapped around me and she spoke softly.
“I want my mom.”
“Shhhh.”
“GET MY MOM!” I yelled through sobs into her chest.
“Your mom is dead, Elena,” she said softly and rested her chin on my head.
I pushed her back as she said those words. “I’m not dead.”
She shook her head staring at me with great concern.
“Then what is he doing here!” I yelled and pointed at Blake. “I killed him, I know what I saw.”
“Blake just go.”
“Constance, I’m not leaving.”
“I said leave,” she said a bit louder, and pulled me away from him, blocking the view of the door with her body. She turned my chin slowly to face her. “You didn’t kill anyone. That kiss made him Dent. It was something that should’ve happened a long time ago. The blood was just a side effect.”
“A side effect?” I shook my head. “No I felt for a pulse. He wasn’t breathing.”
“Elena,” Blake said again.
“I thought I told you to leave.” Constance sounded harsh.
“I told you, I’m not leaving,” he said back and looked at me. “I’m not dead, okay. I’m right here.” His voice was like honey.
He came closer and I retreated a bit. He didn’t stop and pulled me into his chest. His arms wrapped around me.
He felt real, he felt warm, not like a ghost or a figment of my imagination. He smelled like Blake. He wasn’t dead. He is alive.
Everything in my body started to relax. It was as if this huge weight from my shoulders had been lifted. He is alive.