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"Nope. The next time I kiss you Im gonna take my time, and you said your moms coming home any minute. "
I check the clock on my nightstand and nod.
He bites his bottom lip, deep in thought. "No, the next time I kiss you itll last a long, long time. And when were done youre gonna realize being turned on is not about experience. "
While Im still awestruck, Caleb heads out of the house.
THIRTY-ONE
Caleb
Its Sunday. Football Sunday. Im hanging at Dustys Sports Bar & Grill with the guys, since we can sit in the dining area and watch the game from the three large screens plastered throughout the restaurant.
The place is run-down--even the dark, wooden tables and chairs wobble because theyre so old. But their TV screens are big and new, which brings guys from the closest three towns on Sunday afternoons.
I wonder what Maggies doing today. She works for Mrs. Reynolds in the mornings, but shell probably head home early. Is she home now, sitting in her bedroom? Or is she at physical therapy?
"Did you see that, Becker?" Tristan asks as the crowd in the bar groans.
"Sorry, man, I missed it. " I was thinking about someone I have no right thinking about.
Shaking his head, Tristan points to the screen. "I swear, Guerrera needs some glue on his hands in order to keep the ball in his grip. Thats his third fumble. "
"Fourth," Drew corrects him.
Im not into the game today.
I catch Brian looking at the doorway and signaling over whoever just came into the restaurant. I turn around. Its Kendra. Followed by Hannah, Brianne, Danielle, and Sabrina. I dont think their wrestling cheer will go over too well at this place. But then again, maybe it will.
"What are the girls doing here?" a balking Tristan asks Brian, who obviously invited them.
"Cant we change the rules just this once? Kendra really wanted to come. "
"Ugh, Im gonna be sick," Drew says, then fake gags. "Shes got you by the balls, man. When are you gonna see it?
Drew, the self-proclaimed asshole of our group, for the first time in his life is right on. Just as Im about to proclaim Drew an insightful genius, the girls reach the table. Kendra is wearing tight jeans and a Bears jersey. Brians jersey, the same one I remember him wearing every Sunday.
Brian is staring at his trophy girl, and its making me sick too. Because if thats what I looked like when I was dating her, all grateful that a girl like her chose to gift me with being her boyfriend. Someone shoot me right now.
"Can we join you guys?" Kendra asks, but as the words spew out of her mouth shes already pulling up a chair next to Brian and motioning for the girls to find some chairs, too.
Seriously, this is a huge violation of the "no girls allowed for Sunday ball games" code. I can tell Tristan and Drew are not happy about the invasion of chicks. The reason the rule was created in the first place was that we all agreed girls (at least the ones in our group, a. k. a. the ones sitting down at our table right now) are not interested in watching the game. Theyre interested in breaking our concentration. Its like a challenge, to see if they can distract us from football.
"Hey, Caleb," Danielle says as she parks her chair next to me. "Whatcha been up to?"
Before I can answer, the waitress comes over to our table to slap down our food and ask the girls what theyd like to order.
"What kind of salads do you have?" Brianne asks.
The waitress stifles a laugh. "No salads. We got burgers, chicken sandwiches, wings, and fries. Take your pick. "
Brianne is stunned by the choices. I can tell by the way she looks at the waitress in horror. This place is all about the beer/alcohol for the over-twenty-one crowd. Food is the afterthought. "Ill just have a Diet Coke," she finally says.
All of the girls order Diet Cokes. Nothing else. Tristan rolls his eyes.
"Wait!" Sabrina says, calling the waitress back. "Ill have a burger. No cheese, just plain. "
"One plain burger, five Diet Cokes," the waitress repeats before retreating.
"Ill have a burger, too," Danielle says, piping in. "Plain, like hers. "
"Two burgers, five Diet Cokes. "
Brianne raises her eyebrows.
Danielle shrugs. "What? I didnt have lunch and Im starving. Besides, Im off the no-carb thing, Brianne. "
Drew stands abruptly and puts his hands up. "Okay, if you girls want to join us, theres got to be a few rules. No talking about salads, and I dont even want to hear the word carb. If you didnt come here to talk about the Bears or football, or to reminisce about the year 1985, be silent. And for Gods sake, if you dont know which side to root for, I expect no cheering or comments. Got it?"
Kendras eyebrows are furrowed. "What happened in 1985? Drew, I hate to tell you but we werent even born yet. "
While Drew slaps his forehead in frustration, an embarrassed Brian covers Kendras mouth. "That was the last year the Bears won the Super Bowl," Brian informs her.
He removes his hand from Kendras mouth.
"You do know what the Super Bowl is, dont you?" Drew asks, sitting down at last.
"Of course she does," Brian comments, then pulls Kendra close and keeps his arm draped over her shoulders.
The rest of the quarter is met with silence from the girls and hoots and hollers from the rest of the people in the restaurant. When I happen to glance at Kendra and Brian during a commercial break, her gaze is directed at me as she whispers something in Brians ear to make him smile mischievously.
I swear I just caught her licking his lobe, too.
Disgusted, I get up and head to the can. After I pee, I wash my hands and lean over the sink while I check out my reflection in the mirror. Im a fucking mess, unable to just chill and hang out with my friends. Especially not with the girls here. Especially not with Kendra here. She puts my nerves on edge, reminding me of the past. The accident. Maggie.
The door to the mens room opens and sure enough Kendra walks in. Im not surprised.
"Your boyfriendll follow you in here," I tell her.
She saunters close to me, close enough I can smell her strong perfume mixed with cherry lip gloss. Total overkill.
"He wont. He thinks youre upset, so I told him Id talk to you. He trusts us both. "
"Hes an idiot. "
"He also thinks youre jealous. Are you?"
"Oh, yeah," I tell her. She wants to hear it, so I give her what she wants. Its a game she likes to play. Im tired of playing games, but its the only way to deal with her.
"Youve been elusive, CB. " try busy.
"I thought we had an understanding. "
The only relationship I want is the one I already have, with Maggie. It might not be public, but its genuine.
The nagging thing is, I dont know what Kendra knows. Every time were together, she hints she knows more about the accident than everyone else. But what if she doesnt, what if shes yanking my chain? We were both so plastered that night, and shes a lightweight. Maybe my ex has been playing me this whole time and Im a sucker just like Brian.
No matter how much I want to, I cant risk alienating her.
She creeps her fiery-red fingertips up my shirt like a spider, stopping when she gets to my shoulder. Then she leans in. "Youre like a drug, Caleb. I cant quit. "
Shes thriving on the chase. Not me. It probably turns her on that someone can walk in any minute and catch us this close together. Its the risk factor giving her the rush. "So why are you suckin on another guys ear?" I dont know why I asked. Its not that I even care. I put my hand on her waist, ready to push her away if she comes closer. Im so done with being her pawn.
"I just wanted to get a reaction out of you. It worked. For the past couple of weeks youve given me nothing, no emotion or encouragement. Brian thinks youre into Maggie Armstrong. Isnt that ridiculous?"
Just when Im about to answer, the door opens. Drew comes in, seeing Kendra and me standing close, touching each other in what might look like an embrace. Its not what it seems, but it looks bad.
"Im not even gonna ask," Drew says, then heads to the urinals. Before he slides his zipper down, he turns his head to Kendra. "Do you mind taking this somewhere else?"
"Its nothing I havent seen before," Kendra says to Drew as she steps away from me, breaking all contact.
Drew gives a short laugh. "Yeah, well you may have made the rounds with my friends, but you aint getting your hands on mine. "
"From what Ive heard, one hand would be enough," Kendra shoots back.
"Enough," I say. "Kendra, go back to Brian. Drew, take a leak already. "
Hurt that I havent defended her, she storms out of the mens bathroom, but not before murmuring, "asshole" to Drew on her way out, to which Drew responds, "slut. "
Drew finishes, then as he washes his hands he says, "Caleb, you think hooking up with Kendra is the answer? Listen, let Brian have the bitch and move onto someone else. "
"Its a little more complicated than that. " Drew makes a tsking noise, just like Mrs. Reynolds. "Youre making it complicated. " Then it hits me.
For the second time today, Drew is right on. Im letting Kendra manipulate me instead of the other way around. I dont need to appease her. I can just let her keep the chase going without giving her a chance to go in for the kill. Wow, Ive been going about this whole situation all wrong,
I cant believe the solution is so simple. I take out my wallet and hand Drew a twenty. "Here, pay my bill. Im outta here. "
"You dont have to leave. Im not gonna tell Brian what you and Kendra were doing. "
"At this point, I dont even care," I say, then leave the mens room and head out the back door.
THIRTY-TWO
Maggie
Caleb comes over in the afternoon, totally unexpected. I open the door to answer it and here he is, standing in front of me with a determined look on his face.
"I wanted to see you," is all the explanation I get. "Is your mom home?"
"No. She just left for work five minutes ago. " Caleb and I are friends. Okay, were more than friends. Its strange and complicated, but its the only unstrained friendship I have.
I lead him to my room and have him wait there while I bring up some drinks and chips. We sit on the floor and munch on the chips. We talk about school and wrestling, and laugh about the times when we were kids in preschool and the stupid things we did. Then we play gin with the playing cards my mother got me when I was in the hospital. He doesnt talk about kissing at all. He doesnt even look at me with that hot, wanting look Ive seen before. Hes got something on his mind. I dont know what it is, but its distracting him.
After a while he puts down the cards and says, "I want to help you, Maggie. "
"With what?"
"Playing tennis again. I always see you looking into the closet like theres a monster in there, so I checked it out while you were in the kitchen. I found your racquet. "
I stand up. My heart starts racing as I hobble away from him. "Im never playing again. "
He stands, too. "Im not trying to hurt you, Maggie. Im trying to help. "
I turn my back to him. "I cant play. "