And then he felt her shatter. Ripple after ripple shook her body, squeezing his fingers. He gently ran his tongue around her nub, helping her enjoy each and every moment, bringing her to that sated moment of collapse.
When it came, he slid up her body and kissed her, slowly and tenderly. "That was for you, sweetheart, and only you. Now tell me you will spend the weekend with me."
She sighed and wrapped her arms around his neck. "As I said, you don't play fair."
"With you, I play to win."
"I have no clothes."
"I'll take you home to get some."
She bit her bottom lip. "I'll go get them and bring them back."
He frowned. "Why would you do that? We'll go together."
She hesitated. "Okay."
He brushed his lips across hers. "Good."
* * * *
Jill unlocked her apartment door and then turned to face Ryan. "I really don't want to let you in."
He stared down at her, his expression unreadable. Then slowly, he leaned forward and rested one palm on the door beside her head. "Why?"
She bit her bottom lip. Even admitting why was more than she wanted to do. "Please just wait here."
"What's going on, Jill?"
Jill let her head drop against the door. "In case you didn't notice, I don't exactly live in your neighborhood."
"Which means what?" His tone was soft, not intimidating or angry. For that she was thankful.
She sighed heavily. "You know this fantasy was better when there was no reality mixed in."
His other hand settled beside her head, and he stepped so close they were almost touching. "The best fantasies are real." He hoped she remembered his note. He had implied that even then. "Us, you and me together, we aren't living in a fantasy world anymore. We're creating one. Our own."
She didn't know how to respond. It was such an amazing thing for him to say. He touched her cheek with his fingertips. "I could have just as easily been adopted into a family without money. Material things only separate people who are focused on the wrong aspects of life. Invite me in, Jill."
Emotion made her heart swell. She pushed up onto her tiptoes and slid her hands to frame his face. "Thank you," she whispered before brushing her lips across his.
"Sweetheart, there is nothing to thank me for." Then he smiled. "However," he added, "feel free to kiss me at will."
Jill laughed and, feeling a tad bit more accepting of her apartment, turned and opened the door. Ryan followed her in and was surveying the room as she turned to look at him.
"Well?" she asked, looking at her used brown couch and scuffed tables that suddenly looked ten times worse than usual.
"Your place is fine, and you know it." He grabbed her hand and pulled her to him, kissing her forehead. "Go get your things. I'm a starving man. I need food."
Jill pulled him with her towards the kitchen. "You can raid my fridge while I pack."
Her kitchen was small, barely big enough for two. When they stood in the middle of the tiny space Ryan lifted her up and sat her on the counter. "You know," he said stepping between her legs, making her already wrinkled skirt ride high. "We can always create our own little fantasies any time we like."
He was so tall he still had to look down at her to bring them eye to eye. She wrapped her arms around his neck. "Oh, yeah, like what?"
"Ever made love in the kitchen before?"
She shook her head.
"There are interesting things in a kitchen. Nice little extras that can be put to good use."
She smiled, her finger tracing his full bottom lip. "Like what?"
"Did I mention I really like Hershey's chocolate? I put it in my cereal, on my pancakes, on everything."
"Everything?"
Ryan lowered his head, his mouth hovering over hers. "Got any?"
"I have strawberry."
He laughed, soft and sexy, as he covered her mouth with his, dipping his tongue into her mouth. Gently he touched it to hers, tenderly absorbing her taste.
A knock sounded on the door. "Jill. It's your mother. Open up."
Ryan and Jill both froze, lips locked. Then he half raised his head and looked at her. Jill sighed. "You're getting the real deal, today. No sexy fantasy woman and apparently no chocolate syrup."
He raised a brow. "I was fine with strawberry."
Jill smiled despite her newfound tension.
The knocking started again. "Jill, honey, open up. I've been worried."
Jill leaned around Ryan. "Coming, Mother!"
Ryan smiled as he pushed a piece of hair behind her ear. "You met Gina; I'll meet your mother."
Jill tried to smile but failed, as Ryan sat her down on the floor. Her outfit was a wreck and obviously the prior day's work clothes. She ran her hand over her skirt, and then looked at Ryan. "Well, at least we have clothes on this time."
He chuckled. "There is that. Just think. We could have already gotten out the syrup. Could have been a rather messy first meeting."
Jill gave him a look. "You won't be laughing when she finishes with us. The woman is as nosy as they get. I love her, but she's difficult."
"It'll be fine. Go let your mother in."
Jill let out a long breath and then marched to the door. Her mother flung her arms around her. "Oh, my God, sweetie. I have been so worried. You didn't come home last night."
Jill wanted to say that was nothing new. She hadn't been coming home at night, but she figured that wouldn't help matters. Besides, she usually saw her mother as they both headed out to work. Ryan had been bringing her home so early her mother never noticed her absence.
"I'm fine, Mom." Jill hugged her and then moved to the side so she could come into the apartment.
She started forward, her eyes sweeping Jill's clothes. "You don't look fine. You look..."
As soon as her mother was in the door, she stopped and stared at Ryan. "Well, hello. I'm Helen, Jill's mom."
Jill shut the door and turned to look at Ryan, seeing what her mother must be seeing. Tall, broad, and breathtaking in black slacks and a blue pullover, he was the picture image of female dreams. "Mom, this is Ryan Monroe."
"Hi," Ryan said offering her his hand. She took it, smiling a bit shyly.
"I have to say, I'm shocked. Jill never brings men around."
Jill let her eyes fall shut. This was so embarrassing. She felt like she was back in high school. "Well," Ryan said. "That's encouraging news."
"Thanks for the insight, Mom."
She looked from Jill to Ryan. "Come sit down, and talk to me," she said to him.
Jill rolled her eyes. "Mom, please. I am an adult who does not need my mother giving my..." She stopped.
Ryan looked at her with a brow raised. "Your?" There was a challenge in both his eyes and his voice.
"My friends," she added carefully, "the third degree."
Helen moved to the living room and sat on the couch. "I'm not giving him the third degree. I simply wanted to visit."
Ryan grinned. "Go pack," he said. "I'd enjoy visiting with your mother."
Jill shot him a look, knowing what was coming next from her mother. Ryan had a big mouth...
Helen said "Pack?"
Ryan didn't hesitate. "She's spending the weekend with me, Ms. Green."
"Helen," she corrected and looked at Jill. "Go pack, dear. Your friend," she emphasized the word, "and I will be just fine."
Jill looked from one of them to the other. It was a conspiracy involving her mother. Crazy. She threw her hands in the air and marched towards the bedroom, mumbling under her breath as she did.
To make matters worse, she was almost certain she heard them laughing as she did. This was as strange as things got.
Chapter Twelve
Monday morning came far too quickly. It was six o'clock in the morning, and Jill was already dressed for work, sitting in a coffee shop. Ryan was at the register ordering for them both. She had woken up to his hands all over her body. His lovemaking had been tender
, but demandingly possessive.
He was going out of town for the rest of the week. It was not something Jill was excited about. How could she be? She was going to miss him.
Inwardly, she sighed. Her weekend with Ryan had been better than fantasy. It had felt very real, and very wonderful.
Thinking back to the prior day, she smiled. They were both so excited about the BG account that they had actually worked through some of the presentation together. It was fun working with him. They laughed, and joked, but at the same time really made progress.
Then there had been the movies. They had spent Sunday seeing one of the new action flicks. A definite guy film, but she hadn't minded. A chick flick would have just made her want to jump him in the theatre. As it was, she had struggled to keep Ryan in check when the lights went down. Both of them had pigged out on popcorn and milk duds. Two things they shared a love for and considered necessities while watching a movie.
She was so deep in thought she didn't even notice Ryan as he made his way to the table. He sat down. "You're thinking way too hard. Save whatever it is until I'm out of town."
Jill looked at him. "You still haven't told me what you and my mother talked about."
He smiled. "I'll let you try and entice it out of me when I get back in town."
Jill frowned. "I'm serious."
He grinned. "So am I," he whispered, bringing her knuckles to her lips.
She made a face. "I already tried that several times and it didn't work."
Ryan laughed. "But wasn't it fun?"
Jill stared down at her coffee. Her stomach was doing funny things. Him leaving was bothering her more than it should.
Ryan ran his finger down her cheek. "What's wrong, sweetheart?"
She sighed and looked up at him. The way he called her sweetheart really tugged at her heartstrings. He did it a lot. That and baby were his two endearments. "I don't really know. I just feel..." How did she explain that she felt like she had come home from a great vacation and was facing the real world again?
As if he read her mind, he said. "I wish I didn't have to leave. I promised Bret I would spend some time at his Los Angeles offices so I could see first hand what BG is trying to achieve."
Jill was about to respond when she saw the receptionist from Carlson walk in the door. "Lori just walked in. Damn. See," she told Ryan, "I told you this was too close to work."
Ryan fixed Jill in his gaze. "We're dressed for work. It simply looks like we're discussing the campaign."
Jill nodded, but her eyes were panicked. "Right."
Ryan pushed to his feet and dropped a couple of bills on the table. "Come on," he said.
Jill looked up at him. "Where are we going?"
His expression was hard to read, as if he didn't want her to know what he was thinking. Guarded was the word that came to Jill's mind. That only made her more uptight. It would be easier to deal with his mood if she understood what he was thinking.
Then he said, "Somewhere where I don't have to pretend I am not the man who made love to you all weekend long." His voice was low but intense.
Jill stood, not making eye contact with him. He was angry. And she was starting to get that way. They walked out of the coffee shop, and Jill never looked in Lori's direction.
When they were in the car, Jill turned to Ryan. "I can't believe you're mad. Don't you see what this could do to me?"
Ryan was mad. He was trying to be patient. He really was. Jill was the woman he wanted to marry. He had already decided to buy a ring while he was in LA and propose when he got back.
"What I see is you overreacting," he said meaning it. Lori would buy the story about the campaign. He was sure of it.
"Overreacting? How can you say that? What if she tells someone?"
"Then you tell them we were working."
"But we weren't."
"Jill, I'm not sorry we're seeing each other. There are risks involved for both of us. I'm willing to deal with the gossip. I am getting the distinct feeling you aren't."
She glowered at him. "Of course you're willing. You're the boss!"
He made himself count to ten before responding. He was feeling unreasonable about this and he knew it. She did have reason to be concerned. It was difficult because he didn't want to hide what was between them. "At what point will you be willing to disclose our relationship?"
"I don't even know how to respond to that," she said with a choked sound following the words as she turned away from him. "When would you if you were in my shoes?"
He forced himself to take a mental step backwards and be objective. Reaching for her, he slid his hand across her shoulders. "You're right, Jill. I know how it would look for you."
She turned to him then. "I have a lot to lose," she whispered.
He brushed his knuckles down her cheek. "I know, sweetheart. I know. I hate this, too." He sighed. "I have to go to the airport. I'll call you tonight and we can talk."
Her bottom lip trembled. "You don't have to. I'm fine."
"I want to. Now kiss me like you're going to miss me."
But he didn't give her time. He kissed her with everything he had. A long, passionate kiss meant to remind her why this was worth doing while he was away.
* * * *
Jill went straight to her office after Ryan dropped her off. She needed to be alone. To think. And maybe even to cry. She really thought she needed a good cry.
She had barely sat down when a knock sounded on her door. "Come in."
Celia walked in looking distressed. Jill eyed her. "Why do I know I'm going to hate what you're going to tell me?"
Celia sat down in a chair in front of Jill's desk. "Are you seeing Ryan?"
Jill's eyes fell shut. This was not happening. "Why would you ask me something like that?"
Celia cleared her throat. "Lori saw you two together."
That made Jill mad. It had been all of half an hour and it had already turned to gossip. She fixed Celia in her gaze.
"Well, tell Lori if she gets an idea for the BG account she might just get invited as well." It wasn't like Jill to be snide, but she was really ticked. And hurt.
Celia smiled. "I thought it was something like that. I'll pass the word." She made a face. "I better start with Greg, who has already grabbed the bone and run with it."
Jill shoved a hand through her hair. "Great," Jill muttered. "True or false, the gossip is alive and I am dead meat."
Celia sighed. "I wish I could say that wasn't true."
Jill waved a dismissive hand. "But you can't, so don't bother."
"Sorry sweetie," Celia said as she stood up. "I will do what I can to help."
Jill nodded. "I know."
But the truth was, Jill had made her own bed, and now she had to lie in it. And this time without Ryan.
The writing was on the wall. You play, you pay. Jill had to end things with Ryan if she had any hope of making a living in advertising.
As she had known from the beginning, he would survive the end of their affair, she might not. If she had any hope of salvaging her career, she had to get busy rebuilding what was left of her reputation.
The hard part was she wasn't sure she could stay at Carlson. Seeing Ryan everyday would be too difficult.
* * * *
On Friday morning, Jill sat at her desk, absently tapping a pencil on the wooden top. Tonight was the BG party. She didn't want to go.
Ryan would be arriving back in town just before the party with Bret from BG by his side. Seeing him was going to be difficult. But what choice did she have? She was a part of the BG campaign, and according to Tyler, Bret loved her ideas.
Ryan had called every night he was away. Each time she hadn't answered, letting the machine pick up. By Thursday his messages weren't so nice anymore. He knew she was avoiding him, and actually demanded she call him.
She laughed at that. He didn't know her well if he thought demanding would work. The phone on her desk rang, making her jump as it pulled her out of her reverie
. Jill grabbed it.
"This is Jill."
"So it is," Ryan said into the phone.
"Oh, uh, hi." Busted. She should have known he would call the office after last night's demands on her machine.
"Talk to me, Jill." His voice was low, but demanding.
"I don't know what to say."
"That's becoming your famous line for everything you want to avoid."
"I can't see you anymore."
Silence. Finally, "Is that what you really want?"
She thought about saying yes so he would just go away, but something stopped her. "No," she whispered into the phone. "You know its not."
"Do I?"
A tear trickled down her cheek. "Yes," she said in a shaky voice. "You do."
"Then why are we even having this conversation?"
"If I keep seeing you, then I'm going to resign."
Silence again.
Jill added, "I can't do both."
"We'll talk tonight. It will work out. I promise." His voice was different now, gentler. "Deal?"
She nodded and then realized he couldn't see her. "I hope so."
"It will," he said firmly, and then lowered his voice, "I missed you, Jill."
"I missed you, too," she said without hesitation. How easily her resolve was gone where he was concerned.
* * * *
Jill chose a form-fitting dark blue dress to the party. Underneath, she wore red lace panties and a matching bra. She didn't even try to convince herself she wasn't going to sleep with Ryan tonight. She was wet just thinking about it.
She didn't like lying, not even to herself.
The party was at the Manhattan, the place they had originally met, the place of their fantasy world. That alone made the night hold a certain seductive quality.
Jill was about to go to her apartment lobby to wait for her taxi when she heard a knock on her door. Her heart flip-flopped. For some reason, she knew it was Ryan.
She raced across the room and pulled the door open. He stood there, dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, nowhere near ready for the party, looking stunningly sexy.