"My life is hell!" she yelled to the walls.
What was she going to do? The telephone sitting on the nightstand rang, giving her a reprieve from finding an answer. Jill picked up the receiver on the second ring.
No hello. "How was the first day at work?" It was Cat.
Jill sighed. "You're never going to believe what happened."
"Judging from your tone, it's not good. But I know you. I doubt it's as bad as you think."
"What's that suppose to mean?" Jill asked defensively.
"You take life too seriously."
"I have to."
Cat snorted. "What could possibly be so bad?"
Jill paused. "Remember Ryan?"
"You mean Mr. Perfect? The one you ran out on with no forwarding address?"
Grunting in a rude way she reserved only for Cat, Jill said, "Guess who is President of Carlson and now my new boss?"
Cat laughed into the phone. "Uh-huh? You have got to be kidding! Oh-my-God! What did you do?" Jill could just imagine Cat's mischievous expression. The woman loved scandal. Before Jill could respond she continued, "What happened when he saw you?"
"That's the crazy part. Would you believe he kissed me? Kissed me!" Jill waved her hands. "I mean, my God, the man is my boss. What in the hell am I going to do?" And then because she couldn't help it she said again, "He's my boss!"
Her voice held desperation and she held the receiver in a death grip that would have easily broken a glass.
Cat laughed in disbelief. "One night of hot, anonymous sex did nothing to change your prudish ways, did it? You still want him, he still wants you, and it's that simple. Do I need to be graphic about this?"
"Cat," Jill said, "he's my boss."
"Do you report directly to him?'
"Not exactly."
"Then I don't see a problem."
"He is president of the company I work for!"
"So?" Cat demanded.
Jill stared at the phone in disbelief. Even Cat had to see the problem with this.
Cat sighed into the phone. "Look, it's not a big deal. Just don't get your heart involved. Have a nice, neat affair and forget it when it's over. Keep it simple, keep it private. It will do you good to have a nice little heated affair. You don't experience life enough."
Jill was silent a long moment, trying to process her thoughts and Cat's loudly spoken opinions. The problem was, among many, she wasn't sure it wasn't too late to keep her heart out of the matter. But she wasn't about to admit that. Not even to Cat.
"This is a normal thing people do?"
Cat snorted. "Oh please, honey, all the time. You really are naïve sometimes. Stop making it so complicated."
By the time Jill hung up with Cat, she didn't feel any better. In fact, she felt worse. To think Ryan might want to have a heated little office affair with her, and then pretend it didn't happen later ... well, any way she sliced it, she didn't like it.
It was hard enough to forget him after one night. The plain truth was, after two weeks she was still obsessed with the man. She might never recover from an affair.
Chapter Six
Jill arrived to work the next morning to find an envelope on her chair. Inside she found a single sheet of shiny pink paper and a hotel key. Her heart lurched. She glanced at her door, knowing it was shut, but needing the reassurance of a second glance.
She sank into her chair, heart beating a million miles an hour, and read.
At night I lay awake thinking of your soft skin, wishing you were naked beneath me. I can feel you in my dreams. Can you feel me? During the day you drive me to distraction filling my thoughts with secret desires. Surrender your fantasies to me.
Discover our own little fantasy world, our secret place no one else shares.
Meet me tonight.
The Manhattan Hotel
Nine o'clock - Room 2012
By the time she finished reading, Jill's hand was shaking, and her insides trembling. The note wasn't signed, but then it didn't have to be.
She knew who it was from.
Dropping her elbows to the desk she let her head fall into her hands. Oh God, what was she going to do? She couldn't sleep with her boss.
She couldn't.
Could she?
She wanted him. It was like an ache that wouldn't go away. Her eyes drifted shut, her thoughts racing with images of their bodies entwined, of his mouth on hers, on her skin. He was like a drug. She couldn't help but consider temptation.
Temptation. The word danced in her mind.
A knock sounded on her office door. She jumped and then shoved the note in her top drawer. Swallowing hard, she forced her words, "Come in."
Celia pushed open the door, and offered Jill a friendly smile. With her was a tall, blond man Jill recognized from the board meeting. "Jill, this is Greg Marsh."
Greg gave her a bright white smile that was quite devastating. If you liked his type. Jill didn't. He was the kind of guy woman liked. Just not Jill. That was one of the things about her attraction to Ryan. She never went head over heels over a man. Except Ryan. Mentally she shook herself. Already her thoughts had drifted back to him.
"Nice to meet you, Jill" he said coming forward and offering her his hand.
Jill accepted it reluctantly. There was a hint of interest in Greg's eyes she didn't want to encourage. "Nice to meet you," she replied formally, and with a distinct coolness to her tone.
It took him too long to release her hand.
Celia met Jill's eyes, a look of understanding and apology in her gaze. "Greg is your teammate for the BG account."
Jill managed to plaster on a fake smile. Words, however, proved more difficult.
"I'll just leave the two of you to your duties," Celia said making a quick exit. Yes, run, Jill thought. Leave me as the victim.
"So, Jill," Greg said, making himself comfortable in a chair. Jill didn't like the familiar way he used her name or the flirtatious twinkle in his eyes. "Tell me about yourself."
She bit back a retort. "I'd rather talk about the campaign."
"If we're going to be working together, I think we should get to know each other."
"I'd rather get to know BG. Tell me what they're all about."
Jill was relieved when he started talking, dropping all the flirtatious undertones. Since he liked to talk, it took several hours for him to relay all he knew about BG. Surprisingly, he knew a lot. The problem was they disagreed on what BG needed for the campaign.
"Look Greg," she said just before lunch. "You draft your ideas and I will draft mine. Let's meet tomorrow morning and compare notes."
"We're supposed to be working together," he said firmly.
Painting on a smile that was beginning to make her cheeks hurt, she said, "But you have an upper hand. You know the account, I don't. I need to take the afternoon to research and understand what I am dealing with."
He studied her a long moment. "How about we meet up for dinner to compare notes?"
A bark of laughter escaped her throat. "Ah, no. Bad idea."
His eyes narrowed. "It would be strictly business."
"Would it?"
He grinned. "Unless you prefer it be different."
Her lips thinned. "I prefer we meet first thing in the morning."
He gave her a knowing look as he pushed to his feet. "If you change your mind, buzz my office."
Relief washed over her as she watched him walk towards the door. She had a campaign to think about. It was important to her to do a good job on this. But instead of working on the BG account, she pulled Ryan's note from her drawer.
What was she going to do?
* * * *
Jill stood outside the hotel room door holding the key in a shaking hand. She came to talk. Nothing more. She had to put an end to this craziness before it destroyed her career.
No way could she sleep with her boss. Not now that she knew who he was. She started to swipe the key, and thought better. Instead, she knocked. After a minute, she knocked
again. No answer. No answer?
Strange.
Maybe he changed his mind.
Her teeth found her bottom lip. Now what? She stared down at the key. Expelling a long breath, she swiped the key through the door. Nervously, she pushed open the door. It was dark except for the flickering light of candles. She sniffed the air. The soft, sweet scent of vanilla filled her nostrils. Shadows danced across the walls, while silence and seduction thickened the air.
Jill's heart raced. She squinted, as her eyes adjusted to the light. The room was a large suite with a living room area and a bedroom. A large entertainment center divided the two sections.
She didn't see Ryan. Had he gone out for something? She frowned. Surely not with the candles burning.
Tentatively, she stepped towards the bedroom area. As the king-sized bed came into full view she gulped, taking in the vision before her with rising anxiety.
There were at least fifteen candles scattered around the room. A single red rose lay in the middle of the bed. Beneath the rose was an envelope much like the one she had found that morning.
This wasn't going as planned.
Unable to resist, she tossed her purse onto the television stand and walked to the bed. She reached for the envelope. Her shaking hand lifted the seal and pulled out the note inside. She read it twice.
This is our own little fantasy world. No one else enters. This world is yours and mine, where pleasure is first, and fantasy can always be reality.
Jill could hear her own heart beating in her ears. She wanted this. She wanted Ryan. But she shouldn't. But how could she not?
Then, as if out of nowhere, his hands were on her shoulders, his mouth against her ear.
"I want to make love to you, Jill. I want to kiss every inch of your body so perfectly you never forget me or our little fantasy world."
His words were a reminder of what he had said two weeks before. The meaning didn't escape Jill. And she hadn't forgotten.
His hands slid down her arms, leaving goose bumps behind, and then settled around her waist. It felt so good to have him touch her again. Jill let her head fall back against his shoulder. His scent was warm and perfect, infiltrating her senses like an alluring spell.
His nearness provoked an instant rush of desire so strong she couldn't think straight.
He stepped closer, ridding them of the small space that had been between their bodies. The action molded the roundness of her bottom to his pelvis. His hands slid to flatten on her stomach.
"What do you say, Jill?" he asked brushing his lips along her earlobe. "Shall we enjoy our own little fantasy world?"
Jill suppressed a shiver. "I came here to talk," she all but whispered.
His lips feathered kisses on the delicate areas of her neck. "Then talk."
"I can't when you're..." She couldn't get the words out. His hands moved up her sides, past her ribs, just barely skimming the bottom of breasts. The anticipation made her nipples harden and throb.
And she was wet. There was no fighting this need that was growing inside. She wanted him. She wanted this.
But it was wrong, and she knew it. Her body, however, didn't care. It just wanted.
"This isn't wrong," he said as if he read her mind. Then he gently turned her to face him, pulling her snug against his body.
Her hands settled on his chest, and again, his scent, his pure, perfect male scent, filled her nose, seducing her, making her want to say yes. Yes to anything he asked.
Her fingers curled in his shirt, fighting the urge to run her hands across his chest and shoulders. He wasn't dressed for work as she still was. It somehow made this easier. His slacks and pullover made him seem less the President of Carlson.
Perhaps he knew that. Could he have been perceptive enough to know she needed to distance herself from his work persona if she was to do this?
"While we're here," he slipped his hand to the side of her face, into her hair. "Carlson doesn't exist. We are two lovers enjoying each other."
"What if someone finds out?" she whispered, but deep down she knew she had already made up her mind. No way could she walk away from another night in Ryan's arms.
"Ah, sweet Jill, who's going to find out?" he asked gently. "I won't tell, if you don't tell."
He bent his head and brought their lips so close to hers they almost touched them, his warm breath dancing on her lips, making her hungry for his taste. She wanted to grab his head and pull his mouth to her own.
But she didn't.
"I want you, Jill," he whispered and then rewarded her with a brush of his lips. But then they were gone, leaving her wanting all the more. "And I believe you want me too."
Her eyes shut waiting for his lips but they didn't come. "Tell me, Jill. Tell me you want me. I have to know you want this."
Her heart beat like a drum in her chest. The decision she was about to make was going to have a profound impact on her life. She knew it instinctively. She fought to respond as she should. The answer should be no. No, she didn't want this.
"Yes," she whispered. This time she didn't restrain her need for his lips. Her hands moved to cup his cheeks as she pushed up on her toes and pressed her lips to his.
He gave her what she wanted, dipping his tongue into her mouth and letting her absorb all that was him. She made a sound of pleasure as his hands pressed her lower back, molding her softness into the strong lines of his own.
Slowly, he backed her towards the bed, all the while his mouth devoured hers, tasting her with fervent strokes of his tongue. When the back of her legs touched the mattress, he pulled his lips from hers. With passion darkened eyes he stared down at her. She stared back, melting more each moment.
He reached for the pink satin buttons on her silk shirt and started to undo one after the other. Neither of them spoke. With each flicker of the candlelight, sexual heat and tension seemed to sway between them, wrapping their bodies in a warm blanket of desire.
When Ryan finished with last button on her blouse, he pushed the silk off her shoulders. His palms skimmed her arms, leaving a trail of goose bumps from his touch. Silk brushed her leg before it pooled on the floor.
His gaze dropped to her breasts, lingering on the barely-there white lace of her bra. His index fingers traced the top of the material. "Nice."
She wasn't sure if he meant the lingerie or her breasts. Either way, the response was the same. Her skin heated, her heart drummed in her chest, and wetness dampened her panties.
God, she wanted him. This could be her last time with Ryan. How many times had she wished for a second night with him?
Just one more.
She was going to savor this opportunity, and enjoy him completely.
She wanted to touch him, and see his naked body.
Jill reached for his shirt and tugged it from his pants. She looked him in the eyes, quelling the terrified feeling in her stomach that she might regret this later.
Her resolve was heavy. The meek little good girl inside her would not win. Okay, so she was never meek. But a good girl? Yes. No. Not any more.
Not with Ryan.
"We do things even," she said with only the slightest tremble to her voice. "I lose a piece of clothing, then so do you."
A slow smile slid onto his lips. He reached over his shoulder with one hand. In a quick motion, he pulled his polo shirt over his head, flexing his muscles in a delicious way as he did so, and then tossing it to the floor.
Her teeth found her bottom lip as she took in his broad shoulders, tapered waist, and abundance of rippling muscle. The man was made like he belonged on a calendar donning many women's walls.
"Nice," she whispered, meaning it, repeating his response to her. He laughed--a soft, sexy sound that disappeared into her mouth as he pulled her close and kissed her.
* * * *
Ryan soaked in Jill's response. He loved the contrasting sides to her. She was so sweet, and innocent, but not. And her skin was as soft as rose petal, and as addictive as a drug. She tasted l
ike sweetness; she felt like temptation.
He had been afraid she wouldn't show up. He had anticipated her resistance. He had also known she wouldn't hold true to it once he got her in his arms. The fire between them was simply too hot.
She was touching him now, her hands all over his body, his body rock-hard, and throbbing with the ache of desire. Damn, he wanted inside her. But he wanted this to last too. His hands moved up her back, making quick work of unhooking her bra, and disposing of it.
He replaced it with his hands, loving the feel of her high breasts and pebbled nipples in his palms. He pulled back from their kiss, looking down at his palms, pinching her rosy nipples and watching them respond.
She moaned. He loved her sounds. She wasn't quiet about her pleasure. He liked that a lot. She let him know when he made her feel good. "I love your nipples," he told her, still looking at them.
She didn't respond. Not that he expected her to. "I want you naked," he said still teasing her nipples with his fingers. "I have a few fantasies in mind tonight. What do you say, Jill?" he asked challenging her. "Do you have the courage to play?"
She stared at him, looking a bit dazed, and then reached for her skirt. He took a step backwards and pulled his belt loose. They watched each other as they undressed. Both eager and quick about it.
When Jill was down to her tiny white lace panties, thigh high hose, and her black heels, he said, "Leave the rest. I like it."
He slid his hand down his erection. "Can't you tell?"
She wet her lips, looking at him without reserve. Taking a step forward she replaced his hands with one of hers, wrapping it around his width, and then slowly sliding her palms up to the tip.
His eyes slid shut as she stroked underneath his swollen tip, and then spread his moisture on the tip with her finger. He forced his eyes open. It would be so easy to lose control with Jill. He had been thinking about this night and day for two weeks. But he couldn't let that happen, not tonight.
"Turn around," he told her.
Her eyes widened. "What?"