In it, he and his brother were standing in the shade of a large oak tree with their mother, who was kneeling to hold onto both of them. They were in their Little League outfits, streaked with dirt from a game. His mother was wearing a billowy dress, as she usually did, and she looked just like a mother should: round and comforting. He could still remember their conversation that day by the tree.
"Mom, did you see my home run?"
"Oh, honey," she rubbed his back, "you were wonderful out there."
Luke butted in, "Did you see me get the guy out on first?"
"Sure did. I was the proudest mom in the whole world up there in the stands."
Travis rubbed his eyes and put the picture down. His father must have snapped the picture right before they ran off to celebrate with the other kids. They didn't know it then, but the cancer was already growing inside of her. Travis wished, for the millionth time, that he had known how little time they had left with her. He would have curled up with her warm, soft body more often, instead of spending hour upon hour playing video games with his friends.
She had been gone a long time, nearly twenty years, and he didn't know why he was being so maudlin out of the blue.
She would have loved Lily.
The voice in his head shocked him. So what if it was true? What did it matter what his mother would have thought about the grown-up Lily? It was his life. And she wasn't his type at all.
He was glad she had clarified what they were to each other. Purely professional was exactly what he wanted. He must have been crazy to even consider touching Lily again. But now that he'd given in to his idiotic impulse, he was going to be stuck with her for five days in Italy. He consoled himself with the thought of ditching her as soon as they landed. He'd find plenty of lusty Italian women to take to bed.
A knock sounded at the door. He yelled, "It's open," and Luke came strolling in with a six-pack. "What are you doing here?"
"Twin ESP. Thought you could use a drink," Luke said as he plopped the beer on the kitchen island and handed a cold one over. Travis scowled at Luke, but tilted his head back and drank.
"So, I hear you're taking Lily to Italy tomorrow," Luke said as he plopped his large frame onto Travis's black leather sofa.
Travis nodded and just as negligently unfurled onto a facing chair. "That's right."
"She said you gave her a big decorating job."
"Also right," Travis said. "What's your point, little brother?"
In a heartbeat, Luke was on Travis, and his shirt was bunched up in Luke's hands. "If you do one single thing to hurt Lily, I will personally see to it that you pay." He let go of Travis and stood up. "Well, I gotta go. Have a nice trip," Luke said, then walked out of the loft, closing the door behind him with a click.
6
LILY BUCKLED HER SEAT BELT and accepted the glass of champagne from the pretty, reed-slim flight attendant. "Thank you so much," she said as the attendant moved on to serve a well-to-do couple behind her. Lily surveyed her first-class surroundings with wonderment. I could get used to this kind of life , she thought with a smile. From now on, it's first-class or nothing.
Lily laughed out loud at such a ridiculous thought. She still couldn't believe that she was sitting in the lap of luxury on a Virgin Atlantic flight. They were going to change planes in London, then it was straight to Rome. There was even a neon-striped bar in the compartment back behind the seats. It was so decadent. So lavish. So stimulating. Just like Travis's hands had been on her breasts. Just like his mouth had been between her legs. Just like his cock had been...
Stop it, she ordered herself sternly. With a shake of her head, Lily forced herself to concentrate on the various goodies that had been waiting for her at her seat. She was rubbing a free sample of tea tree oil on her hands when Travis walked into the aisle.
Her smile went. He was so big he seemed to suck all of the oxygen from the cabin. She had to resist a crazy urge to pull her emergency oxygen mask from above her seat. But God forbid she give Travis the satisfaction of knowing how badly he affected her. In the aftermath of their sex-in-the-pool play, she had greatly enjoyed having the upper hand with Travis.
His bright green eyes sizzled for a brief moment, going clear so quickly Lily was sure she must have imagined the heat. Closing her eyes, figuring that she'd been about as brave as she could be, she replayed her talk with Luke.
"I can't do this," she had said, giving in and calling her best friend at midnight even though she knew she should be packing her pathetic, dumpy clothes for Italy.
"You're doing great," he had replied, a virtual thumbs-up across the wireless lines.
"No, you don't understand." Feeling like a bigger idiot than ever before, she had whispered, "He's flying me to Tuscany, and I told him that I want our relationship to be strictly platonic."
Luke whooped and Lily had held the phone back from her ear. "That's perfect, Lily. A stroke of genius."
"But what if it's not genius?" Lily blushed fiercely, thankful that Luke couldn't see her face. "What if he's happy about it and never wants to, well, you know ...ever again?"
Luke had laughed. "Travis hasn't done anything this spontaneous since we were kids. I have a feeling that you are getting to him, and good." Oblivious to Lily's inner shame at lusting helplessly after Travis, Luke added, "All the better that you're making him beg for it. Just stay strong and keep up the good work."
Lily had hung up and given up on her clothes--they all were so ugly she really should burn them. Instead, she had settled in to spend the rest of the night worrying instead of sleeping. What if she didn't let him touch her again, and he left her untouched for good and was glad? What if she let him touch her, and he got bored? What if she let him touch her, and he didn't want to out of disgust? What if he did want to touch her, for whatever strange reason that she still couldn't figure out, and she wasn't strong enough to resist him, then he left her high and dry and even more pathetic and needy than before? What if he could feel the heat between her legs that he always caused simply by breathing and knew without a shadow of a doubt that she wasn't strong enough to resist him? Hour after hour passed in an endless wheel of doubts and self-recriminations.
In the clear light of day that was streaming in through the oval window at her left shoulder, Lily reopened her eyes and watched with trepidation as Travis stalked her in her oversized leather seat. His eyes roved over her outfit, and Lily couldn't help hoping he liked what he saw. She had dressed in one of her few nice outfits, a flirty red dress that Janica had made for her several years back. Lily hadn't had the courage to wear it before, but as she got dressed after a long, scalding shower she realized she was going to need all the confidence she could get. Evidently Travis had liked her red suit enough to have sex with her in the swimming pool, so she figured red was a good bet. Now, seeing the heat rise in his eyes-- Thank God he wasn't totally immune to her, she thought with a rush of pleasure mixed with relief--Lily wished that she owned a few other sexier outfits.
"Hello," he said, his voice husky and warm.
Lily shivered under his gaze, and he bared his white teeth in a smile so beastly, she almost pushed past him to go lock herself in the bathroom for the duration of the flight.
"Hello," she replied in a remarkably steady, light voice, even as she wished that she could be so lucky as to wake up to a naked and warm "Hello" in his bed in the near future.
But that, of course, was out of the question given her brilliant plan. Although it was looking less and less likely that she would be able to hold out during their trip, not if she was wet and wanting him in the first five seconds of their flight. That is, she reminded herself with harsh reality, if he even wanted to be with her again.
Five days in romantic Tuscany with Travis was going to be impossible.
The familiar taste of the fear of rejection hit Lily like a brush of cold air, and she shivered, picturing the scene too clearly: Travis hitting on a lovely dark-haired, olive-skinned lady in a bar, while she nursed a gla
ss of wine in a dark corner and tried not to feel ugly and out of place. Travis making passionate love to the lithe, vibrant woman, while she made do with the dildo she had packed and gallons of chocolate gelato. It was all too real. All too possible. All too much like her life had been up to that point.
Travis cut into her negative visions. "Are you cold?" he asked, making no disguise of staring straight at her rapidly hardening nipples. "Should I get a blanket from the stewardess for you?"
Fighting the urge to cover her breasts with her arms, Lily shook her head and shot Travis a brilliant smile, pulling her one and only ace out of the hole. "Thanks for your concern, but I'm fine ." She accented the word "fine," knowing how much it bothered him ever since their mind-blowing sexual interlude in the pool.
Her taunting seemed to do the trick, since he immediately stowed his briefcase in the overhead bin and sat down next to her without another word.
The stewardess leaned a little too close to Travis in a blatant display of youth and sexual confidence. "Would you like a glass of champagne, sir?"
Travis nodded and took the glass as the woman said, "Let me know if you and your wife need anything else before takeoff," then turned back toward the cockpit.
Lily blinked stupidly. You and your wife? Someone actually thought that she could get a guy like Travis to marry her?
As if sensing her thoughts, he leaned toward her. "I wonder what gave the stewardess the impression that you and I were married?" he said, his words slightly mocking, implying that Lily was the obvious responsible party.
All of her stuffed-down embarrassment bubbled up inside her, mixing with something that tasted remarkably like rage. "I certainly didn't."
The plane taxied and soared over San Francisco Bay, up beyond the clouds. Lily tried to focus her attention on the bright blue sky, on the clouds, on anything but Travis's thigh and arm only inches away from her. Briskly, she opened the thick romance novel she had bought at the airport newsstand and tried to lose herself in the story, but she could hardly make sense of the words that swam before her. It was no use, not with Travis in the seat next to her at thirty thousand feet, so she pretended to sleep, all the while horribly aware that she wanted him more than she ever had before.
Overwhelmed by Travis-induced claustrophobia, Lily realized that if she didn't get up out of her seat and away from Travis in the next second, she was going to lose it completely. And since she didn't want to leave the rest of the first-class passengers with the memory of some big girl breathing into a barf bag to stop hyperventilating, she kicked off the soft blanket across her legs and stood up, trying to figure out how to slide past Travis without touching him.
"Excuse me," she muttered to his knee.
Travis shifted barely an inch. "Getting up to stretch your legs?"
Lily stopped staring at his knee and glared into his pupils. There was a threat implied somewhere in his seemingly innocuous words, she knew there was, even if she didn't know exactly where. And the smug way that he stayed buckled into his seat really bugged her. He knew perfectly well that he was making getting into the aisle virtually impossible for her. Why, she wondered furiously, couldn't he be a gentleman and stand up so that she could get into the aisle without rubbing every inch of her heated flesh against him?
"Yes," she hissed. "Now will you please move?"
Travis smiled placidly, but Lily didn't miss the devil in his eyes. "You can get past me, can't you?"
"No problem," she said, her voice flat with suppressed anger. "I'd hate to disturb you when you look so comfortable," she said with disgust. Travis merely nodded and raised an eyebrow while waiting for her to slide on by.
What had she ever seen in him? Why had she pined after such an out-and-out jerk all these years? So what if he had a huge cock and knew just what to do with it? So what if the things he did with his tongue made her want to slip into a coma? Big deal if his hands on her nipples was as close to heaven as she'd ever get. Phenomenal sex was no excuse for the way he treated her.
I hate you, she thought and it was so good to feel something other than lust for Travis, that she thought it again. I hate you, so there.
Now that she had decided she hated Travis Carson, once and for all, all that remained was to figure out how to get past him into the aisle without bringing herself to orgasm on some part of his body. She looked at his thigh and remembered her wetness on him, then cursed herself for being lily-livered again.
"Maybe I should change my name to Jennifer," she muttered.
"What was that?" Travis asked, all innocence.
"I wasn't speaking to you," she said, and licked her lips, trying not to notice that Travis closely followed the progress of her tongue, then shifted in his seat, looking suddenly uncomfortable.
Back to her plan for making it out to the aisle in one piece. No matter how she looked at it, there was no way to win. Either she was going to smash her boobs into Travis's mouth or she was going to suffocate him with her butt. And then she wouldn't be able to keep an eye on him. Who knew where his hands might go if she wasn't looking? She caught the amusement and blatant sexual challenge in his eyes at her quandary and knew that she had no choice but to slide out with her eyes fixed on the blackguard.
Sucking her stomach into her rib cage as far as it would go, Lily pressed her spine into the back of the seat in front of them and slid to the left. Right then, Travis's book fell off his lap onto the floor and he bent forward to pick it up. Silky black hair brushed against Lily's nipples, and she sucked in a breath.
"Stop that!" she whispered, her face hot with need and annoyance.
Travis straightened up and put the book safely on her empty seat. As if he didn't realize she was caught between the seat in front of him and his thighs, he brushed a red curl away from her cheek. "My book fell."
His gaze fell to her hard nipples, and Lily wanted to scream with frustration. Suddenly her rash decision to put on something enticing seemed like the stupidest thing she'd ever done. How could she have thought that wearing something so revealing with virtually no support was a good idea?
Closing her eyes, she pushed past Travis, ignoring the warm hand that somehow found its way to her thigh. Finally, she was in the aisle, and freedom had never felt so good.
Or so cold now that Travis's heat was gone.
I'm finally free of him, she told herself, planning on spending the rest of the flight at the bar, but instead of feeling happy, she couldn't help but feel a little let down.
Shaking her curls out, she straightened her shoulders and smiled at the cute young bartender, who was making no bones about his appreciation for her dress. "Can I get you something to drink?" he asked.
Pleased by his appreciative smile after all of Travis's barely disguised mockery, Lily slid onto the round barstool with a sigh of relief. "I'd love a gin and tonic," she said, feeling naughty and giddy. "And I love your accent," she added, wanting desperately to have a normal conversation with someone after the stilted repartee that she and Travis were so good at it. "Where are you from?"
The young man grinned as he mixed her drink. "London."
Lily rested her chin on her hands. "I'd love to go to England one day for more than just a layover." The bartender set her drink in front of her, and she took a sip. "Delicious," she said, enjoying the buzz that crept into her skull. She took another sip, and said, "I've never been anywhere before. I can't believe I'm going to Italy."
The bartender leaned onto the counter, his brown eyes soulful and not-a-little lustful, about to reply when his eyes shifted over Lily's shoulder.
"I'll have whatever she's having," Travis drawled as he slid onto the barstool next to Lily, trapping her hips between his thighs, making his possession of her perfectly clear to the bartender.
Instantly the young man stood and was once again a consummate professional. Lily put the gin and tonic to her lips and gulped the rest down. "I'm done," she said. Getting up as fast as she could, she had to steady herself on the gleaming wood bar.
"Got to work on upping my tolerance," she muttered as she hoisted herself back onto her heels. She walked briskly down the aisle past her seat, past the curtains where the flight attendants gossiped, into a private compartment with one bathroom door. She prayed that it was unoccupied as she reached for the handle.
It turned easily and she raised her eyes to the plastic paneling on the low ceiling of the aircraft. "I owe you one," she said, and stepped into the rather large bathroom. The wind was all but knocked out of her as something large pushed in behind her and locked the door.
She spun around, or tried to, in the space that was definitely not big enough for two. "Are you crazy?" she said. "Get out of here."
Travis looked sickeningly at ease in the bathroom with her, and she wanted to poke his eyes out. Or wrap her legs around him to ride him into submission. She couldn't decide which until he said, "I wanted to make sure you were okay. You seemed a little unsteady there at the bar when you stood up."
Definitely poke his eyes out, then ride him.
I hate him, she reminded herself, then said, "I don't like you very much right now," which seemed a bit harsh to her ears.
But Travis wasn't scared off by her declaration. "Why not?" he asked, his voice silky and hot. "I like you Lily. A lot," he said as he deftly turned them around and pressed Lily back against the door.
"Remember what happened last time?" he said, the devil tempting her with memories of one of the best orgasms of her life, of his tongue slipping in and out of her wetness, of his teeth closing in gently on her clit.
Lily shook her head and closed her eyes. "Please go," she begged, hating herself for being weak, hating herself for not being the kind of woman who could kick Travis out. Hating herself for wanting him so bad she was going insane with it.
"Ever heard of the mile-high club?" Travis's voice wrapped around her like cashmere, and she found herself looking into a mouth made for cunnilingus. His lips found hers, and she could have sworn the plane dipped a thousand feet as she fell into him, desperate for more of his taste, for the pleasure that only he could give her.