picture; he was standing with another man, both grinning. A lump went to Andrea’s throat, but she didn’t say anything. When Thom gazed her way, the question was obvious; what had happened to his youngest brother?
“He died in a war in Asia, the Vietnam War. 1968 I think.” When she went through these after Carl died, she felt like mourning three men. That one sat near her almost wasn’t real.
Thom set the picture on the table, wiped his eyes, then stood. “I’m going for a walk.”
“We’ll be here honey.”
He kissed the top of her head, didn’t look at Laurel. Thom exited through the screen door, careful not to slam it.
Andrea collected the snapshot, then gazed at Laurel. “That’s Jack, his youngest brother. Musta been nineteen in this picture, maybe twenty. He wasn’t young when he was sent over there, got killed anyway. Thom hasn’t asked about any of his family yet, probably assumed they were all dead. I think they are.” She picked up a small stack of pictures. A few were of the three of them together, taken by Donnie, who had liked Thom. She had consoled Andrea after he…
He hadn’t run away. He had fallen asleep, waiting for her now. “Shit. What the hell sense does this really make?”
“Grandma…”
“No, I mean it. Okay, so you told Juss some BS story, and it’ll probably be enough. You know what, I don’t care if it is or not. He’s here.” She waved a photo. “This’s him, the man who just went out that door, and fifty years have gone by, but damnit Laurel, he came back. I never, ever thought he was gonna come back to me.”
“Grandma, I’m sorry, I’m…”
The women sobbed, holding each other close. Andrea pulled away first, then set the pictures back in the box. “Keep these at your place. I don’t wanna see them again and he probably won’t either.”
Laurel nodded. “I’ll go put them in my car.”
“Thank you honey.”
After Laurel left the kitchen, Andrea sighed, then ate a cracker. Then she went to the sink for some water. She drank it, staring out the window. Thom and Laurel spoke in the side yard, then Laurel took his hands. He looked to the ground, then at Laurel, and Andrea wondered who he saw.
She sat back down, felt tired. If he wanted to make love that night, it would be have to be early, she needed to sleep. The door opened, but it wasn’t Thom. Laurel gently rubbed Andrea’s shoulders, then took her seat.
“Well?” Andrea asked.
“Just wanted to thank me for showing up and running interference. Said he’d be in the outbuilding for a while.”
“He’ll have a good cry, get it out, or some of it.” The worst wasn’t the complicated cell phone or computer. The worst was facing so many losses.
“Grandma, what’re you gonna do?”
“Live with him.”
Laurel rolled her eyes, then smiled. “You’re not gonna outlive him.”
“I might.” Then Andrea chuckled. “Honey, all I’m gonna do is think about today. He’s gonna need some space, has a lot to ponder. In the meantime, there’s groceries to put away, maybe a good old movie to watch, or a lousy new one. He’ll find things to keep himself busy. Maybe I’ll even get him on the computer one of these days.”
“Grandma, he doesn’t have an ID or papers or…”
“I’m not gonna make him get a job honey. He’s gonna look after me.”
Laurel giggled. Then she sighed. “Grandma, it’s one thing for Justin to accept him, but…”
“The rest will too. Or they can find their own spaghetti and meatballs.” While Laurel was right about the paperwork, they didn’t live in a big city, could skirt around those issues. And if an issue did arise, Andrea probably wouldn’t be here to fret over it.
Laurel took a deep breath, then ate a cracker. “Grandma, I’m sorry I was so awful.”
“Honey, no one’s to blame. I have no idea what’s going on, can’t even begin to fathom it. I felt the same when your grandpa died, also when Thom left the first time. I couldn’t believe he would actually leave me, either of them. I know Carl’s dead, I lay next to him for half a night. As for Thom…”
She stood, looking out the front door. She hadn’t chased after him fifty years ago, wasn’t about to start now. Once Laurel left, he would probably come inside. Maybe they would lie down together, or just sit at the table, talking or saying nothing at all.
Then Andrea looked at her granddaughter. “Laurel, I’m gonna ask you something, and if you can’t say yes, that’s fine. But if you think maybe someday you could, well, that’s like saying yes. And if you can say yes right off the bat…”
“What?”
Andrea sat down. “He’ll need someone to look after him when I’m gone. Honey, do you think that’s something you could consider?”
Phrasing it that way had come to her watching them just moments ago. If Laurel could just consider it, that was all Andrea needed.
Still that drew a long sigh. “Oh Grandma…”
“Just think about it. I don’t need an answer today or next week. Get to know him, see if that’s something you might be able to do. You’re right, he doesn’t have anything proving who he is. Maybe tonight I’ll look up fake IDs on the internet.”
Laurel stifled a laugh.
“In the meantime, I gotta make dinner. He likes pasta, which is good. But I think I’ll fry up some burgers, make some gravy. God, I haven’t made flour gravy in years.”
Andrea stood, then opened the bag of potatoes. “I’ll see if he’s happy with boiled spuds, not gonna matter with gravy all over them. But tomorrow night’s pizza. I don’t want those mushrooms going bad.”
Laurel said nothing, but reached for a napkin in the middle of the table, then blew her nose.
“Honey, you run along now. I gotta start cooking, and you’re probably tired, working so early today.”
Laurel nodded, then stood slowly. She stepped to her grandmother, a hug offered.
It was reciprocated with older limbs just as needy.
Thom hadn’t been hungry at first, but finished all the potatoes and gravy. A burger remained; he said he would have it tomorrow for lunch. Andrea put it in the fridge, then washed the dishes as he wandered around the house.
Sam called. Andrea told her that yes, that man was staying with her, and yes, he was recovering. Sam said she would tell her sister, letting Andrea off the hook with Cat. Yet three other grandchildren waited, neighbors and acquaintances, but no one would probably intrude on an AA meeting and ask about Thom. Laurel had been smart about that.
At seven that evening, Andrea and Thom took a walk around the yard. Thom mentioned his brother, then asked about the rest. Andrea knew about some of them, but not all. He was quiet, Jack’s death the biggest blow. Thom didn’t ask about the other photographs, and when they went back inside, he locked the doors.
She waited on the sofa. Thom sat next to her, taking her hand. “Dinner was good.”
“Gravy was lumpy, but tasty. I’ll have to practice.”
“But pizza tomorrow, right?”
“Uh-huh. I froze that chuck and the rest of the hamburger. Whatever you like Thom.”
He nodded, then looked into the room.
She did too, trying to imagine it through his eyes; her grandparents’ piano had sat where the TV now rested. Bookshelves were gone, that ugly wallpaper stripped years ago. He stared that way and Andrea smiled. “You still thinking why me?”
“What?”
She kissed his cheek, rousing a grin. “I told Laurel I had no idea why this’d happened. But here you are, you really are here.”
He chuckled. “Sometimes I wonder if I’ll walk into a room and it’ll look like what I know, what I remember.” His voice went low. “Those are just memories now.”
“You were just a memory too, you think about that?”
He smiled. “But I’ve always had you.”
“Not the same me, but…”
His kiss was soft, but Andrea responded as if she was younger than Laurel, a woman who this m
an now considered a memory.
They parted, then he leaned back, taking her against him. “I’ll never be there again, never see those people, those places, it’s all gone.”
“Yes it is. You’ll need to let it go, like grieving.”
“And someday I’ll mourn you.”
“If I’m lucky, yes.”
A few quiet seconds passed. Then he sighed. “And if you’re not lucky?”
“Oh, I think I’ll be getting lucky.”
“Yeah?” he said grimly.
She set her hand on his thigh. Stroking softly, she inched toward his groin. He uttered a small moan. “I think so Thom Sugerman. Lucky might be my new middle name.”
He smiled. “If I could marry you, I would.”
“We’ll just live in sin. Everybody else does.”
He laughed, then placed his hand over hers. “Is it bedtime yet?”
She peered at the wall clock. “Looks like eight to me.”
He stood, then helped her up. As he checked the doors, she closed her eyes, conjuring that dreadful wallpaper, her annoyed parents, Donnie’s slightly jealous smile. Then she thought about Laurel’s curious eyes, and how tenderly she had held Thom’s hands in the side yard.
“You ready Andy?”
She nodded, grasping his arm. “Take me to bed Mr. Sugerman.”
“My pleasure, Miss Watson.”
She let him lead, their steps slightly out of time, but close enough. Andrea headed into the bathroom as Thom turned on the bedroom light.
_______________
Liner Notes
This short story is my first, all thanks to Suzy Stewart Dubot’s kind encouragement. It was written over the course of several evenings in