Strands of his hair fall into his eyes as he tips his head forward and stares into his glass. “What about you?” He lifts his gaze to me and my heart slams against my chest, harder than the beat of the bass in the song playing from the sound system.
“I don’t really want to tell you.”
“Why not?” His lip pops out to a sexy pout. I don’t think he even realizes he’s doing it, which makes it even sexier.
“Because it’s going to make you think I’m lame.”
“I would never think you’re lame.”
“Yeah, we’ll see.” I sigh, placing a hand over my scars. “One.”
His head cocks to the side. “One?”
I nod, shamefaced. “Yep, just one.”
He brushes his hair out of his eyes. “I don’t know why, but I thought it’d be more.”
“Yeah, I grew up in a small town, so there weren’t a lot of options,” I explain in a tight voice. “Plus, the town I grew up in didn’t make it easy. Everyone knows everyone, so I couldn’t even sneak out on a date without it getting back to my mother.” I sigh again. “It probably makes me sound pathetic that I just didn’t say to hell with what everyone thinks.”
“It’s not pathetic.” He covers my hand with his. “It wasn’t always easy for me, either, and I had two supportive parents. I can’t even imagine how hard it’s been for you. Did you have any friends or anything to support you?”
My fingers flex below his and even though it’s almost instinct at this point to pull away, I force myself to keep my hand where I want it to be. “I had a couple, but no one close.”
“What about the guy you dated?”
I smash my lips together so forcefully I feel like they’re going to bruise.
“Seth.” His eyes soften and I swear he can read right through me, see the scars hidden on the inside of me, beneath my skin, along my heart, across my soul.
Tears start to burn in my eyes, but I suck them back. “Can we talk about something else? I don’t think I’m ready for this conversation yet.”
“Okay.” He easily lets it go and I like him even more because of it.
We spend the next few hours talking and drinking. When he asks me to dance, I feel bad when I say no.
“I don’t think I’m ready for that,” I explain apologetically. “I’m sorry.”
“That’s okay.” His lips tug to a small smile, covering up his disappointment. He looks at his watch and his eyes widen. “Shit, it’s after three o’clock. What do you say we head back to campus?”
“I actually like that idea a lot. I’m starting to reach my sleep drunk phase.” My gaze skims the dance floor, the bar, and the entrance. “But where the hell is Luke?”
“He left about an hour ago with that girl,” Greyson says.
I shudder. “She was so gross. He could do way better.”
Greyson smiles to himself as he gets to his feet. “I’m going to go to the bathroom and then we can go. It’s a pretty nice night, anyway. Great for a walk.”
By the time I guzzle down the rest of my drink, he’s made it back to the booth. “You ready?”
“Yeah.” I stand up and start pushing my way to the door.
He moves up behind me, so close that his solid chest brushes my back. His body heat engulfs me and I find myself slowing down and taking my time.
The song suddenly switches to a more popular one and the crowd around us goes wild. Everyone starts jumping up and down and the floor vibrates. Greyson laughs and joins in, dancing behind me while continuing to move toward the door. Every time he moves, he grinds against me. By the time we make it to the exit doors, I’m on the verge of losing it, so riled up all I can think about is ripping his clothes off. I almost welcome the idea, too, and contemplate acting on what my body wants, even surrounded by people.
Thankfully, the cool night air acts kind of like a cold shower and helps me relax a bit. I manage to keep myself under control as we round the building and head down the sidewalk toward the campus a few miles away. It’s late enough that hardly anyone’s out and when Greyson reaches over and takes my hand, I don’t pull away.
“You never did tell me what your major is,” Greyson says as we stroll past the closed stores.
“That’s because I don’t have one.” Between the alcohol in my system and his fingers wrapped around mine, I feel high, like I’m having a crazy out-of-body experience. “I figure there’s just too many things I’m good at to pick only one talent,” I joke with a grin.
Chuckling under his breath, his gaze flicks to the stars in the sky then back at me. “If you had to pick a major right now, what would it be?”
I thrum my finger against my lip. “How about weekend partying?” I tease. “No, if I really had to pick one right now, I’d probably pick psychology.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. There’s something about the human mind that I find fascinating,” I tell him. “But I also like English and drama and, of course, clothes, but that can’t really be a major. The one subject I hate is math. A math major will never, ever happen.”
“Do you play any sports?”
I choke on a laugh. “Are you kidding me?”
Greyson shrugs innocently. “I’m just trying to figure you out, and you never know.”
I glance down at my stylish outfit. “Do I look like I play sports?”
“I don’t know.” He shrugs again. “Maybe you’re hiding a rock hard body under those clothes.”
I roll my eyes. “Oh, whatever. You’re totally feeding me a line right now.”
“I am not,” he protests, biting back a grin.
I roll my eyes so hard they almost get stuck up in my head. “What about you?” I step back and scroll over his lean, toned, smoking hot body. “You could be a sports guy?”
“The only thing I do that is even remotely athletic is going to the gym.”
“Aw, so you work out?” I muse over something. “I think you and I might be polar opposites.”
“Is that a bad thing?"
“Nope. I don’t think so, anyway. I actually told my friend Callie the day I met her that opposites attract and make the best kind of friends.”
“You two seem really close,” he says.
“We are… She’s my best friend,” I tell him. “I like helping her, too.”
He momentarily studies me, his gaze making me feel restless. “Who helps you, though?”
I shrug, getting squirmy over where the conversation is headed. “I’ve always been good at taking care of myself. Besides, her letting me help her helps me, if that makes sense.” I chuckle as I daze off at the lampposts across the street. “We have this list of things she’s afraid to do. I’ve been helping her slowly scratch off stuff and have even done some of the stuff with her. It’s fun, but I still worry about her.”
“That guy she was with at the party,” he says, glancing at a car as it drives by. “That’s the guy she likes, right?”
I nod. “Yeah, there’s a long story behind how they met, too… I think they’d be good together if they could get on the same page. But Callie’s afraid and doesn’t trust many people. And Kayden... Well, I don’t know him very well, but from what Callie’s told me, he has every right to be wary.”
He grows quiet, staring at the intersection ahead of us. “I’d really like to meet her. Callie… I mean… I know she’s important to you.” He offers me a smile. “Maybe sometime in the future the three of us can hang out?”
“Okay.” It seems like such a simple request, but it’s so much more.
He’s talking about the future. Meeting my best friend. Whatever’s happening between us, he sees as a long-term thing, which probably means a lot of dating, hand holding, kissing, intimacy, emotions. I won’t be able to hide behind my smile anymore.
I’m not sure if I’m ready for that.
All I know is that I want it, more than I think I realized.
Chapter 10
Greyson
Friday night, I’m s
tupidly nervous for some reason. It’s not like Seth and I haven’t hung out. We’ve spent a lot of time together since the poker game. We hung out that night at the Red Ink, drinking well into the morning hours¸ and we’ve grabbed lunch together, been to a movie, and texted off and on each day in the week since.
Tonight’s date night, and I waver between being excited and wanting to hurl as Seth and I wander past the painted canvases and photographs hanging on the walls. Maybe it’s because I haven’t really done much dating, and I feel a bit out of my element, my full awkwardness shining through.
“So, this is what you do, huh?” Seth squints at a photo of a flower taken at an angle to blur the surroundings.
“In a way, kind of.” I take a sip of my wine as I study him instead of the photo. “I actually prefer taking pictures of people, though.”
“Oh, yes, I remember.” Seth glances at me from the corner of his eye, his lips twitching upward. “When they’re not watching, right?”
I shake my head, reliving the embarrassment all over again. “Actually, yes. And not just with you,” I say as we move to the next exhibit, a canvas splattered with neon colors. “I think the best photos are taken when the person isn’t watching. They’re completely themselves and not so self-conscious.”
“Yeah, I can kind of see that.” He examines the painting in front of us. “No offense, but I don’t really understand how splattering paint across a canvas can be art.”
“No offense taken at all, since I completely agree with you.” I smile at him, grab his arm, and wander toward the back corner, where a few of my photos are being displayed. “What about these? What do you think of them?”
Seth finishes the rest of his wine then angles his head to the side. “I’m not sure… they feel kind of dark and are taken at a really awkward angle.”
I feel like I’ve been punched in the stomach. “Yeah, I guess I can see that.”
Seth turns his head toward me with a sly smile on his face. “I’m fucking with you. I know they’re yours.”
I shake my head, but realize how much I value his opinion. “That was a dick move,” I say in a light tone so he’ll know I’m kidding.
“Sorry. I promise I didn’t mean it, though. I just have a twisted sense of humor.” He turns his concentration to the picture I took of Jenna and Ari on a bridge with the river as their background.
“They didn’t know I was taking it,” I explain, moving up behind him.
He tenses from my nearness, but doesn’t budge. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about the way he kissed me the other night. I was kind of shocked when he allowed me to kiss him, and I was completely floored when he took charge the way he did. I can’t wait to kiss him again. Tonight. Tomorrow night. Kiss and kiss and kiss.
“They look so happy and in love,” he remarks quietly. “And free.”
“Free?”
“To be themselves.” He cups his scarred arm as he stares at the picture. “I kind of envy them in a way.”
“Seth.” I gently place a hand on his arm. “Tell me what happened.”
He shakes his head. “I can’t.”
“Why not? I promise, I’m a good listener. I can be there for you.”
He shakes his head again. “It’s too soon and honestly, I think the story’s a little too dark for you. I love how you don’t see all the ugly in the world… I don’t want to take that away from you.” Summoning a deep breath, he turns around and faces me. “So, you have to tell me what’s up with that giant statue at the front door that totally looks like a penis.” His subject change throws me off a bit, and it takes me a moment to get my footing again.
“Penis statue?” I scratch my head. “I’m not sure which one you’re talking about?”
He aims a finger toward the front door at a tall, blue tinted sculpture.
I shake my head. “Fuck, it really does look like a penis, doesn’t it?”
He laughs. “It does, but I don’t think that’s what it’s supposed to be. The plaque on it said ‘to inspire you.’ It totally did, but not in the way I think it’s meant to.”
“Oh, yeah.” I down the rest of my wine in one swallow. “How did it inspire you, then?”
“It inspired me to never, ever attempt to understand art.” He peeks over his shoulder at my photos. “I like yours, though. They’re the only ones I really get.”
“Just wait until you see Jenna’s.” When intrigue crosses his face, I grab his hand and pull him toward the back of the building. On my way, I swipe two more glasses of wine from of the serving table, then duck behind a curtain that leads to the room where Jenna set up her exhibit.
Darkness surrounds us, and I smile to myself as Seth’s hand tightens on mine. When Jenna told me what she was doing, I initially thought it was creepy. Now, though… Well, I think she might be fucking brilliant.
“What the hell is this?” he hisses under his breath. “I can’t see a damn thing.”
“I think that might be part of the point,” I whisper, sliding my hand up his arm. I feel him shiver from my touch and my cock starts to get hard. Unable to see, any reservation I felt has vanished and I feel so… alive. “Come here,” I whisper, pulling him closer.
Our bodies crash together, but our lips don’t quite connect, and we end up bumping foreheads. We laugh, fingers fumbling, my heart racing.
“Okay, that was so the worst kiss.”
“No way,” he says as he works to catch his breath. “I think it might quite possibly be the best kiss I’ve ever had.”
Before I can reply, his lips find mine. Through the dark, my hands wander over his body, up his arms to his shoulders as I pull him closer. My pulse pounds as I let out a quiet moan and deepen the kiss, gripping him tightly. I’ve kissed plenty of guys, but this kiss is so different. I feel so comfortable, so un-awkward, so in my element. Right now, in this moment, is exactly where I belong. It took me a while to find it, and I’m not about to fucking let it go.
Suddenly, a bright light flashes through the room, lighting up the walls and curtains around us.
Seth jerks back, eyes wide as the lights turn on. “What the fuck was that?”
“That was perfection.” Jenna jumps through the curtain with an old school Polaroid photo in her hand. “Oh, my God, that was seriously the most perfect kiss I’ve ever seen.”
Seth’s jaw is pretty much hanging to the floor. “Were you watching us?” he asks, trying to catch his breath.
“Only towards the end.” She lifts the photo in front of her. “So I could take this. It’s part of my exhibit. You would be amazed at how much freedom people feel when they’re in a dark room and don’t think anyone’s watching.”
“But someone was watching.” He snatches the photo and stares at it as the white turns to color. “A creepy girl with purple hair.”
“I’m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable,” Jenna says, but doesn’t sound particularly apologetic. “If it makes you feel any better, I’ve done it to like ten other couples already. And one couple was a step away from having sex on the floor.”
Seth’s nose scrunches as he glances down at the carpet, but he loosens up when he looks back at the photo again. “I’ll forgive you,” he says. “But I’m keeping the photo.”
“You have to let me at least see it first.” Jenna reaches to take the photo.
Seth tucks his arm behind his back. “No way.”
Jenna pokes out her lip and clasps her hands in front of her. “Please.”
Seth glowers at her. “You know that cutesy, innocent look isn’t going to work on me, right?”
Jenna scowls at him, but then smirks. “I bet I can get you to show it to me.”
“Yeah, right. You don’t know who you’re messing with, honey. I always get my way.”
Jenna pokes my side. “Greyson, pout and tell him you want him to show me the photo.”
I raise my hands in front of me. “I’m not getting into the middle of this.”
She jabs me again. “You?
??re the one who instigated the kiss, therefore this is all your fault.”
“That is kind of true,” he says, amused. “So, she has a valid point.”
I gape at the two of them. “What kind of logic is that? And how the hell did you two go from arguing to turning on me.”
“We’re not turning on you.” She reaches up and pinches my face between her hands. “We just want to see that cute pouty face of yours. I don’t know what the big deal is. You do it all the time, anyway.”