Chapter XXXVIII
VINICIUS to LYGIA:
"Hast thou ever been in Antium, my dear one, with Aulus and Pomponia? Ifnot, I shall be happy when I show this place to thee. All the way fromLaurentum there is a line of villas along the seashore; and Antiumitself is an endless succession of palaces and porticos, whose columnsin fair weather see themselves in the water. I, too, have a residencehere right over the sea, with an olive garden and a forest of cypressesbehind the villa, and when I think that the place will sometime bethine, its marble seems whiter to me, its groves more shady, and thesea bluer. Oh, Lygia, how good it is to live and love! Old Menikles, whomanages the villa, planted irises on the ground under myrtles, and atsight of them the house of Aulus, the impluvium, and the garden in whichI sat near thee, came to my mind. The irises will remind thee, too, ofthy childhood's home; therefore I am certain that thou wilt love Antiumand this villa.
"Immediately after our arrival I talked long with Paul at dinner. Wespoke of thee, and afterward he taught. I listened long, and I say onlythis, that even could I write like Petronius, I should not have power toexplain everything which passed through my soul and my mind. I had notsupposed that there could be such happiness in this world, such beautyand peace of which hitherto people had no knowledge. But I retain allthis for conversation with thee, for at the first free moment I shall bein Rome.
"How could the earth find place at once for the Apostle Peter, Paulof Tarsus, and Caesar? Tell me this. I ask because I passed the eveningafter Paul's teaching with Nero, and dost thou know what I heard there?Well, to begin with, he read his poem on the destruction of Troy, andcomplained that never had he seen a burning city. He envied Priam, andcalled him happy just for this, that he saw the conflagration and ruinof his birthplace. Whereupon Tigellinus said, 'Speak a word, O divinity,I will take a torch, and before the night passes thou shalt see blazingAntium.' But Caesar called him a fool. 'Where,' asked he, 'should I goto breathe the sea air, and preserve the voice with which the godshave gifted me, and which men say I should preserve for the benefit ofmankind? Is it not Rome that injures me; is it not the exhalations ofthe Subura and the Esquiline which add to my hoarseness? Would notthe palaces of Rome present a spectacle a hundredfold more tragic andmagnificent than Antium?' Here all began to talk, and to say what anunheard tragedy the picture of a city like that would be, a city whichhad conquered the world turned now into a heap of gray ashes. Caesardeclared that then his poem would surpass the songs of Homer, and hebegan to describe how he would rebuild the city, and how coming ageswould admire his achievements, in presence of which all other humanworks would be petty. 'Do that! do that!' exclaimed the drunken company.'I must have more faithful and more devoted friends,' answered he.
"I confess that I was alarmed at once when I heard this, for thou art inRome, carissima. I laugh now at that alarm, and I think that Caesar andhis friends, though mad, would not dare to permit such insanity. Still,see how a man fears for his love; I should prefer that the house ofLinus were not in that narrow Trans-Tiber alley, and in a part occupiedby common people, who are less considered in such a case. For me, thevery palaces on the Palatine would not be a residence fit for thee;hence I should wish also that nothing were lacking thee of thoseornaments and comforts to which thou art accustomed from childhood.
"Go to the house of Aulus, my Lygia. I have thought much here overthis matter. If Caesar were in Rome, news of thy return might reach thePalatine through slaves, turn attention to thee, and bring persecution,because thou didst dare to act against the will of Caesar. But he willremain long in Antium, and before he returns slaves will have ceased tospeak of thee. Linus and Ursus can be with thee. Besides, I live in hopethat before Palatine sees Caesar, thou, my goddess, shalt be dwellingin thy own house on the Carinae. Blessed be the day, hour, and moment inwhich thou shalt cross my threshold; and if Christ, whom I am learningto accept, effects this, may His name be blessed also. I shall serveHim, and give life and blood for Him. I speak incorrectly; we shallserve Him, both of us, as long as the threads of life hold.
"I love thee and salute thee with my whole soul."