Out of love for this earth
   cottonwood
   sandstone
   and sky.
   She had been with him
   only once.
   His eyes (the light in them had blinded her)
   so she had never seen him
   only his eyes
   and she did not know how to find him
   except by the cottonwood tree.
   “In a canyon of cloudy sky stone,”
   he told her (he was describing the Sun House then
   but she did not know that)
   “Colors—
   more colors than the sun has
   You will know that way,
   you will know.”
   “But what if
   the colors have faded
   the leaves fallen already and scattered
   the tree lost among all the others
   their pale branches bare
   How then will I find you?”
   She had to outrun the long night
   its freezing
   approaching steadily
   She had to find the place
   before the winter constellations
   closed around the sky forever
   before the last chill silenced the earth.
   “Kochininako, Yellow Woman, welcome,”
   and he came out from the southeast to greet her.
   He came out of the Sun House again.
   And so the earth continued
   as it has since that time.
   Cottonwood,
   cottonwood.
   So much depends
   upon one in the great canyon.
   Cottonwood Part Two: Buffalo Story
   In those days
   sometimes the people didn’t have very much meat.
   When it got dry
   the deer went too high on the mountains
   and the people only had a little rabbit meat
   if they were lucky.
   When it got so dry
   nothing was growing
   none of the plants
   and there was no corn
   or beans
   they would be hungry then
   the children would cry
   but still there was nothing to eat
   no food.
   It was one of those times
   one of those times when
   there had been no rain for months
   and everything was drying up.
   It was at this time
   long ago
   Kochininako, Yellow Woman went searching
   for water to carry back to her family.
   She went first to the spring
   near the village
   but the water had dried up
   the earth there
   wasn’t even damp when she touched it.
   So she had to walk farther
   much farther toward the east
   looking for water.
   And finally
   when she had gone a long distance to the east
   she found a pool at a sharp curve
   in an arroyo.
   But when she got to that pool
   the water was churning and muddy.
   She was afraid
   because she knew something had just been there
   something very large had muddied the water.
   And just as she turned to hurry away
   because she didn’t want to find out
   what giant animal had been there
   she saw him.
   She saw him tying his leggings
   drops of water were still shining on his chest.
   He was very good to look at
   and she kept looking at him
   because she had never seen anyone like him.
   It was Buffalo Man who was very beautiful.
   “Come with me,”
   he said, and he smiled at her.
   “No, I must carry this water back home.
   My family needs this water,” she said
   but she was still looking
   at him.
   “You shouldn’t have gone so far away
   from your village,”
   he said
   “Because now you are here
   and this is where we are—
   the Buffalo People.”
   So he grabbed her
   and he put her on his back
   and carried her away.
   They went very fast
   and she couldn’t escape him.
   Back at home
   they started to worry
   because she always came back right away
   and they wondered what happened.
   Her husband Estoy-eh-muut, Arrowboy
   waited all night for her
   he sat on the east edge of the village
   and watched for her
   but she did not come.
   Right before dawn
   the Big Star
   the Morning Star came and said to him,
   “Ahmoo’uut, you are looking for Kochininako.
   Well, I saw her this morning
   as I came up from the East.
   Buffalo Man has taken her over there.”
   So Estoy-eh-muut went to find Spider Woman
   because she knew many things
   and maybe she could help him.
   She was sitting in her place
   at the base of a bee weed plant.
   When she saw him she said,
   “Ahmoo’uut, grandson, how are things?”
   And Estoy-eh-muut said,
   “Oh Grandmother
   the Big Star told me
   Buffalo Man has taken Kochininako.
   He has taken her away to the East country.”
   “My, my,” old Spider Woman said
   “Now Grandson, don’t worry.
   I have something that will help you.”
   Then she gave him
   a buckskin pouch
   full of red clay dust.
   “Those Buffalo People
   will not easily give her up.
   They’ll chase after you
   and try to trample you.
   And when they do
   you take this dust
   and throw it in their eyes.”
   So he gave her sweet corn pollen
   and he thanked her for her help
   and he started traveling East.
   He went a long distance
   and finally he came to the wide plains
   where the buffalo grass was growing
   as high as his chest.
   Off in the distance
   he could see the Buffalo People
   and there were four big bull buffalo
   standing guard.
   Estoy-eh-muut crawled very carefully
   through the tall grass
   and when he got close enough
   he threw the red clay dust
   and he blinded each one of the buffalo guards.
   As fast as he could
   he found Kochininako.
   She was sleeping in the tall grass
   some distance from the buffalo.
   “Hurry!” he told her,
   Run as fast as you can!”
   She seemed to
   get up a little slowly
   but he didn’t think much of it then.
   He took her hand
   and they started running
   because by this time
   the Buffalo People knew what had happened
   and they were looking for them,
   in a big herd the Buffalo People
   were chasing after them.
   Buffalo Man sent hail storms
   in big clouds
   trying to slow them down
   but Estoy-eh-muut blew the red clay dust
   at the hail storm clouds
   and stopped them.
   Finally Estoy-eh-muut noticed
   that Kochininako was running slower and slower
   so they stopped to rest
   at a cottonwood tree
   growing by itself
   on the plains.
					     					 			 />
   About that time
   Estoy-eh-muut saw a big cloud of dust
   raised by the buffalo feet
   and he knew they were coming
   so he and Kochininako climbed the cottonwood tree.
   Very soon the buffalo came
   one after another
   they galloped
   right under the cottonwood tree.
   The very last one
   was a young buffalo calf
   who was tiring from the long chase.
   He stopped under the cottonwood tree
   to rest.
   Her urine sprinkled down on his back
   and the buffalo calf looked up
   and he called to the others
   “Come back! Come back!
   Our sister-in-law is here
   sitting up in this tree.”
   The buffaloes turned and came running back.
   They stood around the tree in a big circle
   and Buffalo Man lowered his head
   and went running at the cottonwood tree.
   He was going to butt down the tree
   and get Estoy-eh-muut and Kochininako.
   But just as Buffalo Man was running at the tree
   Estoy-eh-muut shot him with an arrow
   and Buffalo Man fell dead.
   Then Estoy-eh-muut killed all the others—
   all those buffalo standing around the tree
   he shot them with his bow and arrows.
   “Go home,” he told Kochininako.
   “Go home and tell the people to come.
   Now we have plenty of meat
   and no one will be hungry anymore.
   Go tell them to come.”
   But Kochininako
   wouldn’t come down
   out of that cottonwood tree
   He saw she had tears in her eyes.
   “What’s wrong?
   Why are you crying,” he asked her.
   “Because you killed them,”
   she said.
   “I suppose you love them,”
   Estoy-eh-muut said,
   “and you want to stay with them.”
   And Kochininako nodded her head
   and then he killed her too
   and he carried her body to her sisters
   and they went with him to their father.
   When their father saw that Kochininako was dead
   he started crying and shaking his head
   and calling her name
   Estoy-eh-muut told him
   “I killed her
   because she wanted to stay with the Buffalo People
   she wanted to go with them
   and now she is with them.”
   The old man, her father, cried
   “A’moo-ooh Kochininako
   A’moo-ooh, my daughter.
   You have gone away with them!”
   Then they all left the village
   all the people went toward the East
   and they found the cottonwood tree
   where all the dead buffalo were lying.
   They cut up the meat and dried it—
   they made buffalo jerky
   and they carried it home.
   This meat lasted them a long time.
   So that was the beginning—
   the hunters would travel
   far away to plains in the East
   where the Buffalo People lived
   and they would bring home
   all that good meat.
   Nobody would be hungry then.
   It was all because
   one time long ago
   our daughter, our sister Kochininako
   went away with them.
   The Time We Climbed Snake Mountain
   Seeing good places
   for my hands
   I grab the warm parts of the cliff
   and I feel the mountain as I climb.
   Somewhere around here
   yellow spotted snake is sleeping on his rock
   in the sun.
   So
   please, I tell them
   watch out,
   don’t step on the spotted yellow snake
   he lives here.
   The mountain is his.
   When I was thirteen I carried an old .30-30 we borrowed from George Pearl. It was an old Winchester that had a steel ring on its side to secure it in a saddle scabbard. It was heavy and hurt my shoulder when I fired it and it seemed even louder than my father’s larger caliber rifle, but I didn’t say anything because I was so happy to be hunting for the first time. I didn’t get a deer that year but one afternoon hunting alone on the round volcanic hill we called Chato, I saw a giant brown bear lying in the sun below the hilltop. Dead or just sleeping, I couldn’t tell. I was cautious because I already knew what hours of searching for motion, for the outline of a deer, for the color of a deer’s hide can do to the imagination. I already knew how easily the weathered branches of a dead juniper could resemble antlers because I had walked with my father on hunts since I was eight. So I stood motionless for a long time until my breathing was more calm and my heart wasn’t beating so hard. I even shifted my eyes away for a moment hoping to see my uncle Polly or my cousin Richard who was hunting the ridges nearby.
   I knew there were no bears that large on Mt. Taylor; I was pretty sure there were no bears that large anywhere. But when I looked back at the slope above me, the giant brown bear was still lying on the sunny slope of the hill above patches of melting snow and tall yellow grass. I watched it for a long time, for any sign of motion, for its breathing, but I wasn’t close enough to tell for sure. If it was dead I wanted to be able to examine it up close. It occurred to me that I could fire my rifle over its head but I knew better than to wake a bear with only a .30-30. All this time I had only moved my eyes, and my arms were getting numb from holding the rifle in the same position for so long. As quietly and as carefully as I probably will ever move, I turned and walked away from the giant bear, still down wind from it. After I had gone a distance down the slope I stopped to look back to see if it was still a giant brown bear sunning itself on one of the last warm afternoons of the year, and not just damp brown earth and a lightning-struck log above the snow patches. But the big dark bear remained there, on the south slope of Chato, with its head facing southeast, the eyes closed, motionless. I hurried the rest of the way down the ridge, listening closely to the wind at my back for sounds, glancing over my shoulder now and then.
   I never told anyone what I had seen because I knew they don’t let people who see such things carry .30-30’s or hunt deer with them.
   The Buffalo Dancers commemorate the transformation of the Buffalo Spirit Being into human form and the alliance that existed between humans and buffalo.
   Two years later, on the north side of Chato, my Uncle
   Polly was rewarded for his patience by the “old man
   of the mountain” as my uncle had called him—the mule
   deer whose antlers were as wide as a gun rack. As soon
   as the big buck had gone down, Uncle Polly signaled
   so those of us close by could go help.
   As I cut across the south slope to reach my Uncle
   I realized it was middle afternoon almost the same
   time of day as before, except this year no snow
   had fallen yet.
   I walked past the place deliberately.
   I found no bones, but when a wind moved through the
   light yellow grass that afternoon I hurried around the
   hill to find my uncle.
   Sleeping, not dead, I decided.
   Rain clouds and the rainstorm in the distance with the natural sandstone rain cistern in the foreground represent two fundamental elements of human survival on this high desert plateau in New Mexico. The scene might be from a thousand years ago. Water has always been scarce here, and the sandstone cisterns of rainwater are precious and sacred to the Laguna and Acoma people.
   My sisters, Gigi and Wendy, stand behind me with the pottery water jars balanc 
					     					 			ed on their heads as the Laguna women did in the old days when they carried water. We are at the edge of the Laguna village rainwater cistern, which is still revered by the people. Our cousins Rachel Anaya and Esther Anaya Johnson from Paguate loaned us the traditional Laguna Pueblo clothing and moccasins as well as the beautiful old turquoise and silver to wear for the photograph.
   Aunt Alice told my sisters and me this story one time when she came to stay with us while our parents had gone up to Mt. Taylor deer hunting. I was seven years old the last time I had to stay behind. And I felt very sad about not getting to go hunting. Maybe that’s why Aunt Alice told us this story.
   Once there was a young Laguna girl
   who was a fine hunter
   who hunted deer and rabbits
   just like the boys and the men did.
   You know there have been Laguna women
   who were good hunters
   who could hunt as well as any of the men.
   The girl’s name was Kochininako and
   she would go out hunting
   and bring home rabbits
   sometimes deer
   whatever she could find
   she’d bring them home to her mother and her sisters.
   This one time
   she had been hunting
   all morning
   south of Laguna village
   a distance past the sand hills
   and she thought
   she would start toward home.
   She was just coming past
   Tchi mu yah a mesa
   when she met up with
   a great big animal
   called Estrucuyu.
   Estrucuyu was some kind of giant
   they had back in those days
   The giant Estrucuyu saw the rabbits
   Kochininako had hanging from her belt
   she had four or five big rabbits
   she had gotten that morning.
   And he asked her
   if she would throw him one of the rabbits.
   So she did
   and he just gobbled it up
   in a minute’s time
   because he was so big.
   He had a great big head
   and he asked for another one
   and another one.
   Pretty soon
   she threw
   every one of the rabbits
   she had
   to this Estrucuyu
   and he just swallowed them
   like they were little crumbs.