“Because I feel lousy. And Amy didn’t say anything about it.”
“It’s a surprise.”
The hell.
“I think you’ve been studying too hard. I think an evening out would do you a world of good.”
“I don’t want to go anywhere! I feel lousy! I want to go to bed!”
“I really think you should go to Amy’s.”
“I’m not going to Amy’s!”
Uncle Denys didn’t look happy at all, and began getting up. “I’ll call Dr. Ivanov. I think maybe he did give you something that’s bothering you. Maybe he can send you something.”
“The hell he can! I don’t want any more shots, I don’t want any more blood tests, I don’t want any more cameras in my bedroom, I don’t want any more people messing with me!”
“All right, all right. No medicine. Nothing. I’ll talk to Petros.” He frowned. “I’m really upset about this, Ari.”
“I don’t care.” She got up from the table. She was wobbly from anger. It was out of control. She was. She hated the feeling, hated whatever they did to her.
“I mean I’m worried,” uncle Denys said. “Ari,—you’re using the computer tonight, aren’t you?”
“What has that got to do with anything?”
“Just—when you do—remember I love you.”
That hit her. Uncle Denys saying I love you? It was a Trap, for sure.
It hurt, because it was about the lowest try yet.
“Sure,” she said shortly. “I’m going to my room, uncle Denys.”
“Hormones,” he said, as shortly. “It’s hormones. Adolescence is a bitch. I’ll be glad when you’re through this. I really will.”
She walked out, and shut the door between her hallway and the living room.
Florian and Catlin stepped put their door the instant she did.
Saying What’s the matter? with their faces.
“I’m fine,” she said. “Uncle Denys and I had a discussion about the taping. You’re going to take the unit out first thing tomorrow.”
“Good,” Florian said in a vague, stunned way.
“I’m going to my room,” she said. “I’m all right. Don’t worry about me. Everything’s fine.”
She walked past them.
She closed the door of her room.
She looked at the computer on the desk.
Exactly, she figured, what he wanted her to do. She should frustrate hell out of him. Make him worry. Not touch the thing for days.
Not smart. The best thing was find out what he was wanting. Then deal with it.
“Base One,” she said. “Is there a message?”
“No message,” Base One said through the Minder.
That was not what she expected.
“Base One, what is in the system?”
The screen lit. She went over to it. There was only one item waiting for her.
The regular weekly update. Second week of April, 2290.
She sat down in front of the screen. Her hands were shaking. She clenched them, terrified, not sure why. But something was in it. Something Denys wanted was in that week, that year.
Second week of April.
Second week of April. Five years ago.
She had been at school. In the sandbox. She had started home.
“Selection one.”
It came up. It started scrolling at the usual pace.
Olga Emory.
Deceased, April 13, 2290.
Ari senior had been at school. When her uncle Gregory had come to get her and break the news.
“Dammit!” she screamed, and got up and grabbed the first thing she found and threw it. Pens scattered clear across the bed and the holder hit the wall. She grabbed a jar and threw it at the mirror, and both shattered and fell.
As Catlin and Florian came running in.
She sat down on her bed. And grabbed up Poo-thing and hugged him, stroked his shabby fur, and felt like she was going to throw up.
“Sera?” Florian said.
And he and Catlin came and knelt down by the side of the bed where she was sitting, both of them, even though she had been breaking things and they must think she was crazy. It was terribly scary for them; it was scary for her to have them come that close when she was already cornered. She knew how dangerous they were. And there was nothing she could trust.
“Sera?” Catlin said, and got up by her, just straightened up, solid muscle, and flowed onto the bed and touched her shoulder. “Sera, is there an Enemy?”
She could have taken Catlin with her elbow. She thought about it. She knew Catlin did. Florian put his hand on hers, on the edge of the bed. “Sera, are you hurt? Has something happened?”
She reached up with her other hand and touched Catlin’s, on her shoulder. Florian edged up onto the bed on her other side, and she got her breath and got her arm behind Catlin and her hand locked onto Florian’s and just sat there a moment. Poo-thing fell. She let him.
“They sent maman away,” she said, “because Ari’s mother died.”
“What, sera?” Florian asked. “What do you mean? When did she die?”
“The same day. When Ari was the same age. Her uncle came to get her. Just like uncle Denys came for me.” Tears ran out of her eyes and splashed onto her lap, but she wasn’t crying, not feeling it, anyway; the tears just fell. “I’m a replicate. Not just genetic. I’m like you. I’m exact.”
“That’s not so bad,” Catlin said.
“They sent my maman away, they sent her on a long trip through jump, it made her sick and she died, Catlin, she died, because they wanted her to!”
Catlin tapped her shoulder, hard, leaned up to her ear and whispered: “Monitors.”
She felt the shock of that reminder in her bones and caught her breath, trying to think.
The scrolling stopped on the screen in front of them.
“Ari, check Base One,” the Minder said.
She made a second gasp after air. Like she was drowning. She held onto Florian and Catlin.
“Ari, check Base One.”
Uncle Denys had known what would come up.
Uncle Denys hadn’t wanted her to go on-line tonight. Go to Amy’s, he had said.
Then told her to check the computer.
“Ari, check Base One.”
“Base One, dammit!” She disentangled herself from Florian and Catlin and thought it was Unusual that uncle Denys and Seely hadn’t tried to get in to see about her when the mirror broke. And then she thought that it wasn’t Unusual at all.
Not with the room monitored.
She sat down at the terminal, in front of the monitor.
Ari, it said. This is Ari senior. By now you’ve gotten the update. By now you know some things you may not have figured out before. Are you upset?
“Of course not.” She felt Florian beside her. She grabbed his arm and held it, hard. “Go on, Ari.”
Your access is upgraded. You are no longer on time-lag. Data is available through April 13, 2295.
She grabbed Catlin’s shoulder, on the other side of her.
“Go on, Ari.”
That’s when I was 12. Updates will still be weekly.
Good night, Ari.
She clenched down until her fingers hurt; and then she realized what she was doing and let up. “Log-off,” she said. And sat there shaking.
Catlin patted her shoulder and gave her the handsigns they had made up for Tomorrow, Outside.
Florian signed: Tonight. Take-out Monitor.
She shook her head, and signed: Stay.
And took them each by a hand.
Knowing that five more years of data were in the files. But she had an idea what was in it.
Exactly what was in it.
Dammit. Dammit. Dammit.
Security was still taping. “Florian,” she said, “Catlin, we are going to Security. Right now.”
Catlin made the sign for Seely.
“They won’t stop us. Get your stuff. Come on. We’re going to go kill that thing. H
ear that, uncle Denys?”
He didn’t answer. Of course not.
She went and washed her face while Florian was getting his small tool kit. While Catlin was getting whatever she thought she might need. Which probably included a length of fine wire.
They walked out into the living room. Uncle Denys was reading at the dining table beyond the arch. Like most evenings. He looked at her.
She said: “We’re going down to Security, in case you missed it.”
“I’ll advise them,” uncle Denys said. “Don’t break anything, Florian.”
Seely was not in the room. Seely should have been. Maybe Seely was monitoring from the office.
She stood there and stared at uncle Denys a long, long while.
“Like your maman,” uncle Denys said, “I’ve tried to help you.”
“They could kill you.”
“Yes. I know that. You know that. You could do that anytime, if you put your mind to it. We have to take chances like that. Because I’m your friend. Not your uncle. Not really. I’ve been your friend for as long as you’ve lived.”
“Which how long?”
“As long as you’ve lived. You’re Ari. One is the other. That’s what this is about. Neither one of you betrayed the other one. You are the one who did all these things—in a very direct sense. Think about it.”
“You’re crazy! Everybody in this House is crazy!”
“No. Go see about Security. I’ll tell them. Your accesses have upgraded considerably tonight. You have real authority in some things. You don’t have to live here. You can take your apartment, if you want to. It’ll be very large, for a young girl and two azi. But you have the key. If you want to go there, you can. Florian can access the Security system there, and vet it for you. Or you can come back here when you’re through. Or you can go over to Amy’s. Her mother won’t ask any questions.”
“Does everybody in Reseune know what I am?”
“Of course. Everybody knew the first Ari. And you began, at least on paper, the day after she died.”
“Damn you.”
“Same temper, too. But she learned to control it. Learned to use it, not let it use her. There’s a lot of Cyteen history in those data files, too. A lot of Reseune history. A lot of things your education has just—avoided, until now. Once upon a time there was a man who could see the future. He began trying to change his life. But that was his future. Someday you’ll access yours—as far as you want to. Think about it.”
“I’m not doing anything you tell me from now on.”
“Ask yourself why five years. Why not six? Why not four? Ask the computer what happened April 13, 2295.”
“You tell me.”
“You can look it up. You have the access.”
“I want all my stuff up at my apartment.”
“That’s fine. Tell Housekeeping. They can do that first thing in the morning. You’d better pack at least the basics—for the apartment where you’re going. Or buy it. Necessaries is open round the clock. If you need anything—like advice on how to fill out the paperwork, whatever,—call me. I certainly don’t mind helping you.”
Trust Denys to get to the mundane, the depressing workaday details of anything.
“I’ll manage.”
“I know you will, dear. I’m still here. If I can help you I want to. Florian, Catlin, don’t let her hurt herself. Please. And take some pajamas.”
“Dammit, uncle Denys,—”
“Dear, somebody has to take care of things. It’s usually me. Do you want to go to your apartment,—or do you want to come back and live here for a little while, till you’ve figured out what it takes to run an apartment on your own?”
“No. No, I don’t. I’ll manage.”
“I’ll send Housekeeping for you. They can’t go in up there. But I’ll have a package waiting at your door, and send your things on tomorrow. Practical things, Ari. I’ll fill out your supply forms for you, and your budget report, you have to have that, or you foul up accounting. I’ll give you copies so you know how to set it up in your Base.”
“Thank you.”
“Thank you, Ari. Thank you for being reasonable about this. This is different from Ari senior, understand. She was fourteen when she moved out of this apartment. But you’re overrunning your course too, by a little. Please. Take care of yourself. Can you give me a kiss?”
She stood there, frozen. Out of this apartment. She swallowed a lump of nausea. And shook her head. “Not right now. Not right now, uncle Denys.”
He nodded. “Sometime, then.”
She clenched her jaw and motioned to Florian and Catlin that they were leaving.
ARCHIVES: RUBIN PROJECT:
CLASSIFIED CLASS AA
DO NOT COPY WITHOUT COMMITTEE FORM 768
CONTENT: Computer Transcript File #5998 Seq. #1
Denys Nye/Catlin II
Emory I/Emory II/Florian II
2418: 4/14: 0048
AE2: Minder, this is Ari Emory. Florian and Catlin are with me. Print out all entries since I was here last.
B/1: There are two messages.
Welcome to your own home. If you get scared and you want to call me or Security, please don’t hesitate. But you’re as safe there as here. Trust Florian and Catlin. Take their advice when it comes to your safety.
Drop by the office tomorrow if you feel like it. There’s so much you need to know. I let you go because you’re not a child, and I wouldn’t bring your Security and mine into conflict: my bet would still be on Seely, but I truly don’t want to put that to the test.
Attached to your Housekeeping list will be Security’s standard recommendations and Seely’s for basic Security set-up. Give it to Catlin and Florian. They’ll understand. They probably don’t need it, but a checklist never hurts even with experienced personnel.
Don’t let Housekeeping in unless Florian or Catlin is watching, Seely always did that for us, in case you never noticed.
Refrigerate the eggs and use the ham immediately: it’ll have thawed. I wasn’t going to send perishables, but you haven’t got any breakfast otherwise. I put in a box of cocoa.
You’re responsible for everything now. But if it gets too much for you, please, call or come by the office.
You’ll have to have an office now, in Wing One. You won’t need it, but now that this apartment is active, you’ll use at least one secretary and one clerk, which you can request from the Wing One administrator, Yanni Schwartz. Do that, or you’ll be diverting valuable time from your studies filling out silly forms, which, I’m sorry, are necessary. I’ve assigned you an office in 1-244, and you’ll need to set that up with Wing One Security. Again, let Florian read Security’s recommendations on that.
I’m upping your personal allowance to 10,000 cr. per month. That may sound like a fortune, but you have to pay 1200 per month for the office and 5000 for the clerk and secretary. The rest will go fast, believe me, so you’re going to have to keep track of that. Of course I’ll help you if you need something special: but you should learn good habits.
Your secretary can manage the credit account, but should not have certain accesses. Again, let Florian and Catlin talk to Seely.
The first Ari’s system of protections is still in Base One: for God’s sake don’t dismantle it until you’ve devised a better one. Florian will advise you there is a security problem with that: it’s been in place when other people, mainly myself, could access some of the keyword functions from the top. But it’s better than nothing at the bottom, where your secretaries will work.
Read the building safety recommendations relative to fire exits and storm drill. Your area has special protections, but there are special things to learn.
Never mind: just read everything I send you and pass it to Florian and Catlin if it involves security or safety of any kind.
I still love you. It’s much more complicated than that, but I am glad you were here and would be more than glad to have you back. There were a lot of times I came to odds with A
ri senior. But we were friends. As I am and will always be yours.
Everything in the apartment is exactly the way your predecessor left it the day she died. You will want to dispose of a great deal of the clothing. Styles change. Pack what you don’t want and notify Housekeeping to remove it.
Your key will also work at my apartment until you’re fourteen. That’s only two more years. It seems impossible.
Meanwhile be good. Please keep your doctor appointments: it is necessary for your health, and you’ll recall your maman saw you kept them, so it’s not just me. You still have obligations, as everyone does who lives in Reseune, and your independent status doesn’t excuse you, it only adds more of them, including obeying adult rules; and if medical says a Supervisor comes in for a check, they come in or they can lose their license. I’ll add the obligation to keep your school schedule. I’ve indicated to Base One that you are extremely mature and responsible. Please don’t make me a liar.
So many people have loved you. Jane loved you most of all. She never wrote to you because she felt that was best for you—she knew there was a time she had to cut the cord and let you go, for your own sake. So do I know that. So I wish you well, out I will still, because you are only twelve and because that apartment is very large and Reseune is much larger, be extremely concerned that you are well and taking care of yourself adequately. I know that you are much older than your chronological age, and that you have Base One to draw on, which is no small thing; you have handled Housekeeping and lab requisitions and finance; you have dealt with reports and lab scheduling; you have lived with the security systems and the regulations of the House all your years; and you have two equally adept companions. I would trust the three of you to handle yourselves in a Security crisis; I am not, on the other hand, sure that you will not leave the oven on in the kitchen or have the watering system overflowing the garden. Ari, however much you disdain trivia and accuse me of obsession with it, I remind you again that clean laundry only happens when you remember to send it to Housekeeping.
If this were Novgorod I could never countenance this move; but Housekeeping, like Security, is capable of coping with crises: and I am sure your mistakes will reach my desk. Reseune itself is my House, and you have elected to move to another of its Rooms.