Again, he clutched her upper arms. “Axia, please tell me what haunts you so. What makes you so afraid?”
“I cannot tell you,” she said. “Please, I cannot. All I want is now, today. Nothing more. It will end soon enough, so do not make it end sooner. Please.”
Releasing her arms, Jamie ran his hands over his eyes. “All right, have it your way. Do not tell me; do not trust me.”
“I do trust you,” she said, trying to take his arm, but he moved away from her.
“Mount your horse. We will be at my home soon.”
Axia could have cried at the coolness in his voice. Turning, she mounted her horse for the first time without Jamie’s help.
Chapter 24
As she rode, knowing that her time alone with Jamie was nearing an end, she debated whether she should tell him the truth or not. Perhaps he would forgive her, perhaps …
In the early evening they stopped by the side of the road to rest, and she could see that Jamie was still angry at her, for he would hardly look at her as he handed her bread and cheese and a pouch of wine. She searched for something to talk about.
“You did not tell me of the Maidenhall wagons,” she said, then could have bitten off her tongue for mentioning the name. But to her pleasure, Jamie smiled.
“You should have seen Smith; he made the ugliest female you could imagine.”
“I am sorry I missed that.” She looked at him through her lashes. “Especially since, in truth, the heiress is so very beautiful.”
Jamie didn’t seem to hear her. “Smith’s hands hung below his gown, you could take shelter from the rain under his nose, yet he showed me a box full of marriage proposals and letters declaring love. And he told unbelievable stories of what had happened to him.”
The cheese and bread stuck in Axia’s throat. If Jamie had not insisted on secrecy, these things would have happened to her. She didn’t want to know, but like a child at the circus, she had to peek. “W-what happened?”
“Marriage proposals by the hundreds, letters begging money, pleas for favors. A woman was convinced the heiress could heal by the laying on of hands, so she followed the caravan for three days while holding her sick child in her arms.”
“What did Smith do?” Axia whispered when she saw Jamie frown.
“Smith gave in and held the child for half an hour, but later …” He trailed off and looked at her, then quickly away. “Later the child died and the woman cursed Smith and spit on him. She said it was his lack of generosity that had killed her child, that the Maidenhall heiress had so much but would part with nothing, not even to save a child’s life.”
“That makes no sense. Because she has money does not mean she has any special powers.” Axia knew that all too well.
“Exactly.” Turning, he gave her a small smile. “Which is why I am glad I did not marry the Maidenhall heiress.”
“You are?”
“I know you worry that I wanted the heiress, but it was all the idea of my family. I do not want to spend the rest of my life known as the man who married the Maidenhall heiress. Too much responsibility and too much speculation goes with such a marriage.” He smiled broader. “So see, I would much rather marry you than the heiress.”
Axia gulped. “But you might change your mind if the letter from Maidenhall gives his permission for you to marry his daughter. Then you will regret that you married me.”
To Axia’s consternation, Jamie threw back his head and laughed at that. Opening the leather bag on his horse, he pulled out a folded piece of paper. “I never sent the letter.”
Axia nearly choked. “The letter to Perkin Maidenhall? You never sent it? But Frances said—”
Bending, he kissed her cheek. “Frances is not too clever, is she? When she insisted that I send the letter to her father through her, I was suspicious, so I told her that I had sent it so I could see her reaction. As I feared, she was horrified. I do not think she ever had any intention of marrying me. It is my guess that she said she wanted to in an attempt to make you jealous. What do you think?”
Axia threw her arms around Jamie’s neck. “I do not care a fig what Frances wanted to do. Oh, Jamie, do you know what this means? It means we have more time. More time!! What money cannot buy. Oh, Jamie, I love you so much.”
Jamie was not sure why a letter not sent should cause her such happiness, but if it caused this reaction, he was glad for it. He was still hurt by her refusal to tell him what great secret plagued her, but he knew that only time could make her trust him.
But one minute he was thinking logical thoughts and kissing her, and the next he was thinking nothing at all and kissing her harder. There were tall hedges by the road so he dragged her into them as though he were a thief after her jewels—which maybe he was.
It amazed him that his passion for her seemed to grow, and now he felt as though he must have her or he would die. And she seemed to feel the same about him. They came together in a flurry of hurriedly thrown aside clothes and searching hands and mouths, rolling about under a hedge of blackthorn trees, clasping at each other, desperate in their attempts to get closer.
Within minutes their passion was spent, and he collapsed on top of her, sweaty and limp. But Axia was wide awake as she caressed his hair, touched his neck, and thought how much she loved him—and how happy she was. If her father had not been sent a letter, then he was not now leading an army to find her and take her away from Jamie.
“Whatever happens, Jamie, remember that I love you,” she whispered. “I love you with all my heart. Even if—”
“If what?” he asked, turning to face her.
Smiling, she tried to sound as though she were making a joke. “Even if I am married to another.”
But Jamie did not smile. “You belong to me and no one else. I have worked hard for you and you are mine.”
“Yes, I am yours no matter what happens.”
He waited, hoping she would say more, but she did not. Again frustrated by her silence, by her lack of trust in him, he moved away and told her they must go, that soon they would reach his house.
Axia wanted to make him forget about her secrets. He would find out what they were soon enough. As he helped her onto her horse, she said, “Tell me of your family. I know your sister is your twin, so is she as ugly as you are?”
Jamie smiled. “I do not know how it happened but Berengaria is beautiful, and even though she is bl—” Breaking off, he had his hand on his saddle, about to mount, when he looked at her. Thinking of her love for Tode, he knew that he need have no fear that she would think Berengaria or Joby or his mother with her drifting mind would be anything out of the ordinary. Axia judged people by what was inside them, not what was on the surface.
Thinking this, when he smiled at her, there was love in his eyes.
“Do you think they will like me?” she asked again. “They will not be disappointed that you have wasted yourself on a poor merchant’s daughter?”
“No, of course not,” Jamie said with utter confidence. “I have sent a messenger on ahead, and they are planning a wonderful welcome for you. You will see. In days they will love you.” With that, he reined his horse ahead of her to lead the way.
Behind him, Axia was not so sure. She’d already figured out that Jamie was as romantic as she was practical. If she were in his family’s place, she was not so sure she’d be thrilled that her brother had passed up an opportunity to marry a great heiress and instead returned home with the penniless daughter of a merchant. But then maybe they were romantic like Jamie and loved love.
Axia was not prepared for the poverty of Jamie’s estate. It was a run-down old castle, probably reeking with history, but it would have been better off with less history and a new roof. With her merchant’s eye, she appraised that it would take a great deal of money to restore it, so much in fact that it would be better to build a new building, something modern and sanitary, and leave this monster to the history books. She couldn’t imagine how cold the place must be in the w
inter.
Moving her horse near his, she asked about what land he had, then was appalled to hear that there were no more than about five acres, not even enough for a good crop. Perhaps a productive orchard could be laid out, she thought. If they had a good year, she might be able to make cider and sell it and—She sighed. No use planning, for she wouldn’t be here, she reminded herself. By the end of the summer she would be somewhere else, probably someone else’s wife; she’d be whatever and wherever her father wanted her to be.
“Is it so bad?” Jamie asked, watching her face, and she could see that he very much wanted her to like his home.
“No,” she said, forcing a smile. “It is not bad at all.”
“Are you getting worse at lying or am I getting better at detecting them?”
She laughed. “I think I can do something with it,” she said, appraising the crumbling stone work.
At that Jamie let out a laugh, then leaned over and kissed her cheek. “I have no doubt that you will, my little wife. I fully expect that this time next year you will have found some way to make the place worth three times what it is now.”
“Ah, then, that should earn me at least a copper,” she muttered, making Jamie laugh again.
“My sisters will love you,” he said.
“And what of your mother?”
“She, ah, I meant to tell you about her. She is, ah, well …” But Jamie didn’t have to find the words to tell Axia that his mother had the mentality of a child and that with each day her mind was slipping further away because just then an arrow came zinging through the air. Landing a yard from Jamie’s feet, it made his horse rear. Even as his horse’s feet were high off the ground, he saw that Axia’s was frightened, so in one motion, he leaned over and grabbed her bridle, bringing both horses under control at the same time. Then, as he looked at her face, he grinned. “Will that earn more drawings of me?”
“Oh yes, Jamie, yes,” she said breathlessly.
Laughing, he dismounted and pulled the arrow out of the ground, unwrapping the message that was tied to it. As he suspected, it was from Oliver and what was written made him frown, but he would not tell Axia what the note said.
“He has not hurt Frances, has he?” she said in fear as he helped her dismount.
“No, but—” He cut off, still frowning, refusing to say more. “I must go. Now. I am sorry, but you must go to my sisters without me. I will come later.”
“Yes, of course,” she said, wanting to feel brave and adult, but the thought of meeting his sisters alone terrified her.
“Come, do not look so frightened. They will love you. I will return in a few hours.”
“I will go with you and—”
“No!” he said sharply.
“There is danger! Something is wrong and you are not telling me.”
“No, there has been no harm done,” he reassured her, “but I must go now.”
“All right,” she said at last, then went to her saddle bag, removed a leather pouch, and handed it to him. “Inside are some herbal mixtures for Frances, and you must see that she has them. She has never been able to take care of herself, you know. One mixture is for colds, and one is to be soaked in hot water for a chest plaster if she coughs. The third is a drink she likes if she cannot sleep, and the fourth—”
Smiling, Jamie kissed her, then took the pouch. “I will see to her health, and I will bring her back safely to you. Now go inside and keep safe for my return.” With a glance up at the windows and another at the people who were on the road around them, Jamie did not want to show a public display of affection, but when he weighed kissing Axia against the public, there was no contest.
Quickly, fiercely, he pulled Axia into his arms and kissed her hard and long, and when he pulled away, he had to support her for a moment until her legs steadied. “Wait for me,” he said, and all she could do was nod. Then he mounted his horse, turned, and went at a gallop down the road, a cloud of dust behind him.
Standing in the road, Axia watched him until there was a sharp bend, then the trees closed around him and she could no longer see him. As soon as she was alone, she knew that for him to leave her alone in a strange place, the message on the arrow must have been very serious. Much more serious than he would allow her to see.
Turning, she looked back at the castle. When she’d been with Jamie, it had seemed a friendly enough place, but now the clouds had blocked the sun and a cold wind had risen. Goose bumps formed on her arms, and looking up at the sky, she thought a storm might be brewing. And as she looked back at the ramshackle old castle, she thought she could feel that another storm might be brewing inside. Maybe she was just being superstitious, but she thought she could feel animosity coming from the inside. Jamie’s family wouldn’t hate her, would they? No, of course not, she told herself. They couldn’t. They had no reason to hate her. No reason at all.
Chapter 25
Joby,” Berengaria whispered, “we have done a great wrong.”
“Do not start on me again,” Joby said with barely controlled anger. “I do not like her; I do not trust her.”
“You have made that abundantly clear to everyone.”
Joby wasn’t going to allow Berengaria’s soft heart to sway her. She had known what this Axia was like before she ever met her, and in the ten days she had been here, nothing Joby had seen since was going to change her mind. “How can you see the way she has tried to take over this place and still have sympathy for her?”
“Oh, Joby, what has made you so hard? Do you not think this falling down heap of stones could use some management? All she did was roll up her sleeves and try to clean the kitchens.”
“It is a matter of rule and power. Surely you must be able to see that.”
“As opposed to not being able to see anything else, is that what you mean?”
“Now she has us fighting.”
“No, she has not made us fight, you have. Oh, Joby, all of this started with that stupid Henry Oliver. Why ever did I allow you to bring him into this?”
“Someone had to do something. I couldn’t very well allow our idiot of a brother to …” She trailed off because just what she hoped would not happen had. They had thought to get Oliver to “kidnap” the Maidenhall heiress, and Jamie would follow her, rescue her, and fall in love with her. But Oliver had, as always, done everything wrong. Instead of sending the note Joby had written for him, he came up with his own and had, by accident, sent it flying into poor Rhys’s leg. With Oliver’s poor eyesight, he had meant to hit the ground in front of Rhys. “Only Henry Oliver is such a bad marksman that he’d miss the ground,” Joby had said in disgust when she’d heard about Rhys.
But everything had backfired because for some inexplicable reason, their brother had taken this Axia with him when he went to chase the heiress, and along the way, he had married her. And now stupid Oliver was saying that he would not release the heiress unless Berengaria married him. So Jamie had been there for days trying to talk some sense into Oliver, and Jamie’s new wife was here with Joby and Berengaria, doing her best to change everything in their lives.
But yesterday Joby had stopped her, for she had told this Axia how her entrapment of their brother had destroyed their family. Joby told her about the villagers giving up their last pennies, their tiny treasures, to make a wardrobe that would gain the love and admiration of the heiress.
“And he would have married her if it weren’t for your interference,” Joby had said nastily. “So now we have lost all our chances for any wealth. Do you think being called Lady Axia will keep you warm and fed this winter?”
In the face of such venom, Axia had backed away from her, whispering, “I am sorry. Please forgive me.” Then she’d turned and fled up the stairs to Jamie’s room and closed the door.
Since then she had not shown her face, not even for meals. As far as anyone knew, she had not left her room.
Now Berengaria and Joby were alone in the solar on the second floor, and Berengaria was full of remorse abo
ut everything she had allowed Joby to do. They had been in agreement about Axia, that from what they had read in Jamie’s letters, this woman was a conniving schemer, but since Axia had arrived, Berengaria had begun to feel differently.
“If I could just see them together,” Berengaria said, and they both knew that she meant that if she could be in the presence of Jamie with his new wife, she would know if Jamie really loved her or not. But Joby was convinced that her gorgeous brother could not be head over heels in love with a plain little thing like Axia. Truthfully, Axia was more like a housekeeper than an earl’s wife, what with her sorting out the kitchens and going through the flour bins. She was certainly not of the same class as their beautiful brother.
“It is done,” Berengaria said, “and we cannot change the fact that Jamie has married her.”
“But I want her to see what her conniving and scheming have cost us. She may think she can earn her place here by sorting the beans, but because of her, there will soon be no beans to sort.”
“What was that?” Berengaria said, her head tilted to one side, listening to the sounds coming from outside.
“I hear nothing.”
“No, listen, there it is again.”
Going to the window, Joby looked down into the garden below, and her temper soared as she saw the woman who had wrecked all their plans sitting on a stone bench beside their mother. Their poor, crazy mother.
“There!” Berengaria said. “What was that?”
It took Joby a moment to believe what she was seeing. “That Axia is writing something and showing it to Mother and she is … Mother is laughing,” she said in disbelief.
“I am going down!” Berengaria said, standing and heading for the door. She was quite familiar with her home and knew the way perfectly.
“Do not let her sway you. Just because she—”
“Close your mouth!” Berengaria snapped as she went out the door, Joby close on her heels.