Page 16 of After Anna


  ‘No.’

  ‘Let’s explore that further,’ Linda said, motioning to her paralegal.

  Chapter Thirty-two

  Maggie, Before

  Maggie drove home from the dealership with Anna, glancing in the rearview mirror to see Simon in the black Range Rover, followed by another black Range Rover, like a caravan of Bulgarian diplomats.

  ‘Are you mad at me?’ Anna asked, shaky. ‘Please, don’t be mad.’

  ‘I’m not mad, but I wish you hadn’t done it.’ Maggie chose her words carefully. She was trying to build their relationship and she didn’t want to hurt their new closeness.

  ‘I thought I was doing a good thing.’

  ‘Why?’ Maggie kept her tone even. ‘You didn’t tell me.’

  ‘Because it was a surprise.’

  ‘But not a good one.’

  ‘Why not? I’m being responsible. I needed a car, did the research, and bought one. And I looked into the insurance and if I didn’t have my own insurance, you’d have to put me on yours.’

  ‘So you called James and got the money?’ Maggie remembered that James had told her Anna wanted a car and barely used funds from the trust.

  ‘No, I texted him.’

  Maggie hid her reaction. She lived in a world where teenagers texted for eighty-thousand-dollar cars. ‘Did you tell him what it was for?’

  ‘Sure.’

  ‘Did you tell him that I didn’t know about it?’

  ‘No, he didn’t ask.’ Anna pursed her lips. ‘Please don’t fire him. It’s not his fault. It’s my fault. I didn’t want to burden you guys.’

  ‘It’s not a burden, it’s our job as your parents.’ Maggie felt more confounded than angry. ‘We talked about this. We were supposed to make that decision as a family.’

  ‘Maybe that’s the problem,’ Anna said, after a moment. ‘I never had a family before. I’ve been on my own all my life. I don’t consult with anybody. If I need something, I get it.’

  ‘Maybe that’s true.’ Maggie felt sympathy, and guilt. Anna had learned to be on her own because she’d been abandoned, by both parents.

  ‘I never spend money. But I wanted the car, I told you. I’m not a brat.’

  ‘I’m not saying you are.’

  ‘I thought you would think it was adult of me,’ Anna said, hurt. ‘Remember when we went to dinner in Congreve, and you told the waiter to give you the check? You beat me to it, and I thought, that’s so smooth. So I said to myself, “I’m just going to beat her to the check.” That’s why I took care of it.’

  ‘I see.’ Maggie felt touched that Anna wanted to be like her.

  ‘I think the kids at school are really going to like it.’

  ‘I don’t want you to get a car because you think it will help you make friends.’

  ‘That’s not the reason I did it, but that’s okay, don’t you think?’

  ‘No, I don’t, honey,’ Maggie answered, gently. ‘You don’t want the kind of friends who like you because you have a cool car.’

  ‘But I saw Land Rovers in the student lot at school and on Facebook. It’ll fit in.’

  ‘You’ll make friends. You could have given it a chance. You could have given yourself a chance.’

  Anna sighed. ‘I can sell it, if you really don’t want me to have it.’

  ‘It’s not that I don’t want you to have it, and if we tried to sell it now, we’d get a fraction of its value.’

  ‘So can we keep it, please? I promise I won’t do anything like this, ever again. Really.’

  ‘Only if you understand my point.’ Maggie looked over when they stopped at a red light, and Anna looked back at her, her mouth turning down at the corners.

  ‘I do. I totally understand, and I’m really sorry.’

  ‘Okay.’

  ‘So you’re not mad anymore?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘Cool.’ Anna smiled.

  Maggie felt better to see her happy. ‘Did you ever drive such a big car before?’

  ‘No, we used compact cars at Congreve to make it easier to pass the test.’

  ‘So Noah can take you out in it, then?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Great,’ Maggie said, though Noah had texted her while they were at the dealership, bad news, be home late. She’d called him back but no response.

  All told, she wasn’t looking forward to the evening.

  Chapter Thirty-three

  Noah, After

  TRIAL, DAY 5

  Linda signaled her paralegal, and another transcript portion appeared on the screen. ‘Dr Alderman, please direct your attention to Commonwealth Exhibit 52.’

  Noah read:

  Mr Carter: Anna, how would you characterize your relationship to your stepfather?

  Ms Desroches: When I first moved in, I felt nervous around him and I told my mom that, and then I realized that he has two sides to him, like, a light side and a dark side. He showed my mother and his son his good side, and I’m sure his patients think he’s a nice doctor. But his dark side comes out when he’s angry or when he’s out of control. Then, he snaps. He’s very controlling. I think his anger at me started when he couldn’t control me or when I wouldn’t give in to, you know, what he wanted. My friend at school, Samantha, calls him Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde.

  Mr Carter: And Samantha is?

  Ms Desroches: Samantha Silas.

  Thomas rose. ‘Objection, Your Honor. This is not only hearsay, it’s double hearsay and completely unreliable. We have no opportunity to cross-examine Samantha Silas or determine the factual basis for her opinion. I objected to its admissibility at the PFA hearing and I’m renewing my objection.’

  Linda faced Judge Gardner. ‘Your Honor, you have correctly ruled that the transcript from the PFA hearing is admissible.’

  Thomas shook his head. ‘Your Honor, this is not a PFA hearing, but a murder trial. Rules of evidence are strictly observed here to guarantee the constitutional protections due my client. I let it go earlier, because it wasn’t as important as this. This portion regarding Samantha Silas should not be admissible.’

  Judge Gardner frowned at Linda. ‘Ms Swain-Pettit, do you know if Samantha Silas is available?’

  ‘I do not, Your Honor. If defense counsel insists, we can strike Samantha Silas’s statement from the record.’

  Thomas pursed his lips. ‘Your Honor, that won’t unring the bell.’

  Judge Gardner sighed. ‘The objection is sustained in part and overruled in part. Stenographer, please strike from the record the statement regarding Samantha Silas’s opinion. The transcript is otherwise admissible, and the jury can determine the weight they will give this testimony.’ He turned to the jury. ‘Ladies and gentlemen, please disregard that last statement regarding the opinion of Samantha Silas.’

  ‘Thank you, Your Honor.’ Thomas sat down heavily.

  ‘Thank you, Your Honor,’ Linda said, signaling again to her paralegal, and a new transcript appeared on the screen.

  Mr Carter: Is there an example you can recall in which the Defendant became angry or out of control, which would help the Court understand the basis for your testimony?

  Ms Desroches: Yes, I needed a car to get to school and I bought one with my own money, as a cool surprise. My mother didn’t love it at first, but we talked it over and she said from now on I should talk to her about it, and that was that. But my stepfather saw the car in the driveway when he came home and he freaked out.

  Mr Carter: What do you mean by ‘freaked out?’

  Ms Desroches: He became angry and abusive. He yelled at me, telling me that I was in his house now and I had to follow his rules and I had to ask his permission before I did anything and everything. That’s exactly what he said, too. And he yelled at my mother and my stepbrother, then he sent me upstairs and I hadn’t even eaten yet, and later I heard him and my mother fighting.

  Mr Carter: Did the fighting turn physical?

  Ms Desroches: No. He’s much smarter than that. He’s manipulative.
And when he doesn’t get what he wants, he becomes angry and out of control. That night, he banged the table so hard that a glass broke. That’s what I mean, like Samantha said, he’s Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde.

  ‘Objection!’ Thomas said, then he and Linda started fighting again, but Noah tuned them out, stricken. He remembered every detail of that night. He knew he’d been out of control, and if he could explain himself to the jury, he could convince them that he wasn’t Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde.

  Noah had been at work when he got the call that one of his favorite patients, a fifteen-year-old named Mike Wilson, had died. Mike was allergic to bee stings and always carried an EpiPen with him. Mike even had great parents, Dina and Steve, who always reminded him, No pen left behind. Noah had made up the slogan himself to help his young patients.

  But on this one day, Mike had left to play soccer from a friend’s house, leaving the EpiPen. Mike had gotten stung on the field, gone into anaphylactic shock, and died. Noah had rushed to the emergency department, answered Dina and Steve’s heartbreaking questions, and comforted them while they cried.

  Noah had left the hospital with their agonizing questions in his ears – did he feel pain, what was it like, did he suffocate to death – then had driven home and found the black Range Rover in his driveway. He’d spotted the temporary tag taped to the window, and in that moment, it had become clear to him that he couldn’t control anything, neither the allergens, nor Mike or his other patients. Not even his own family.

  What the hell’s in the driveway? Noah had shouted as soon as he’d walked in the door.

  Babe? Maggie recoiled, surprised. There’s no need to yell. It’s Anna’s car, and I already talked to her about it. She bought it with her own money.

  That’s not the point! She bought it without permission!

  We’ve settled that already and –

  She has to ask permission! Noah had shouted, slamming the table. A glass fell over and rolled onto the floor, breaking on the hardwood. Anna, go to your room right now! You have to ask my permission for anything and everything!

  Suddenly Noah came out of his reverie because Linda and Thomas were leaving the dais. He didn’t know what they’d decided. Thomas caught Noah’s eye and tilted his chin upward, in a victorious way. The projection screen went abruptly blank.

  Judge Gardner turned to the jury. ‘Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, we’re going to strike from the record not only the statement regarding Samantha Silas, but that transcript portion in general. Court stenographer, please strike that portion from the record.’

  Noah’s heart sank, understanding that he would never be able to explain why he had acted that way.

  ‘Let’s move on, Dr Alderman,’ Linda began.

  Chapter Thirty-four

  Maggie, Before

  Maggie knew that Noah was upset the moment he walked in the door and she knew why. She’d called the office when they’d gotten home, and they’d told her that Mike Wilson had died. Everyone was upset, and Maggie knew that Noah would take it badly, since he’d adored Mike. But even so, she would never have expected him to come home so angry. He’d yelled at Anna about the Range Rover, and she’d run upstairs while Caleb had hustled outside with Wreck-It Ralph, leaving Maggie alone with Noah in the dining room.

  ‘Maggie, how could you let this happen? What’s the matter with you?’

  ‘Noah, really?’ Maggie tried to get her bearings. She stepped back against the table, set for dinner. She’d tried to make everything special. A salmon fillet with fresh dill and rosemary potatoes roasted in the oven, filling the air with its distinctive aromas. She’d cut peonies from her garden and put them in a glass vase, and the late-day sun filtered through the windows.

  ‘What, really?’

  ‘Look, I know you’re upset about Mike, and I’m so sorry but –’

  ‘This isn’t about Mike.’

  ‘Yes it is.’ Maggie knew Noah better than he knew himself, which was probably what most wives thought, and they were right.

  ‘It is not!’

  ‘Stop yelling, you’re acting crazy.’

  ‘The hell I am, the hell I am! Do you know how outrageous that is?’ Noah motioned at the driveway. ‘That a seventeen-year-old buys a brand-new Range Rover, just because she wants one? Do you know how much those cars cost?’

  ‘Yes, but that’s no reason to holler.’

  ‘Evidently I have to because nobody listens! I told you that she was going to get that car. I gave you the heads-up. You dragged your feet on this, and look what happened! Who’s in charge here?’

  ‘Noah, lower your voice or I’m not going to talk to you anymore.’ Maggie swallowed hard, shaken.

  ‘We are a family. She is supposed to be a part of this family. She joins us, we don’t join her. We set the rules, not her.’

  ‘We didn’t have a rule that you can’t buy a car, and anyway, that’s not what you’re upset about.’ Maggie could see that his eyes were bloodshot, and he must’ve been upset after the hospital. ‘I heard you went to meet Dina and Steve. How are they?’

  ‘This isn’t about them, either. This is about Anna and how we live our lives.’ Noah motioned to the driveway again. ‘And that is not how we live our lives. We don’t blow money like that.’

  ‘It’s her money –’

  ‘The point is she has to ask us if she can buy something that big. She lives under our roof and she has to learn our values. That’s what parents do. They teach their children values.’

  ‘She’s never been part of a family before. She’s learning –’

  ‘She’s running the place. She even took my parking space. I can’t even park in my own driveway.’

  ‘Noah, we talked about it, and it won’t happen again.’

  ‘You’re damn right it won’t. That car’s going right back to the dealer.’

  ‘No, all sales are final, and I told her she could keep it.’ Maggie was trying to reason with him, despite the resentment building in her chest. ‘We can teach her our value system, no matter what she drives. She made a mistake, and that’s part of the learning process.’

  ‘Oh really? There’s a learning process? When did it start? Because the good ship “begin at the beginning” already sailed.’

  ‘I’m sorry, I let it get away from me.’

  ‘You sure did, honey.’

  ‘Stop it. Don’t be so snide.’ Maggie didn’t like the way he was looking at her, with contempt. ‘And really, is it the end of the world? Did she lie, cheat, or steal? No, she bought herself a car because she’s used to being on her own. She’s not used to asking anybody for permission because nobody’s ever been there to ask, most of all me. And it’s not why you’re upset anyway.’

  ‘Will you please stop telling me how I’m feeling!’ Noah scowled. ‘I’m feeling the way anybody would feel, any father, any man who came into his house and saw that it was completely out of control.’

  ‘It’s in control. Maybe not your control, but my control.’

  ‘Oh please. She’s got you wrapped around her little finger. You’re overcompensating out the wazoo. What’s she buying next, a house?’

  ‘Basta!’ Maggie stalked out of the dining room. ‘Clean up the glass you broke, before Ralph steps on it.’

  ‘Fine!’ Noah shouted after her, and Maggie stormed up the stairs, fighting tears. She reached the second floor, went to Anna’s door, and knocked quietly.

  ‘Honey?’ Maggie called softly.

  Chapter Thirty-five

  Noah, After

  TRIAL, DAY 5

  Noah sat on the witness stand during another conference with the judge at the dais. This time the courtroom clerk had misnumbered some exhibits, and Thomas, Linda, and Judge Gardner were fixing them, leaving Noah waiting awkwardly, his hands linked in his lap. He didn’t know what to do with himself, like someone eating alone in a restaurant, except that at the end of the meal he could go to prison for the rest of his life.

  Noah couldn’t stop thinking about the fight
over the Range Rover, which now marked him as Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde. After Maggie had gone upstairs, he’d cleaned up the broken glass, gotten a beer, and looked outside the kitchen window. Caleb had been playing with Ralph in the backyard, and Noah had heard him talking to the cat. When Caleb had been younger, he had practiced counting in front of Ralph, who didn’t seem to mind that Caleb had apraxia and his 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 sounded like pa, poo, pee, bah, pi.

  Noah had thought about how much he loved his son and what it would do to him if he lost Caleb, the way Dina and Steve had lost Mike. Even the way that Maggie had lost Anna, gone from her life, only an infant. He felt a wave of guilt that he had treated them all so badly.

  Noah had gone out the back door and crossed the lawn to Caleb, with his beer in his hand. Hey buddy.

  Hey Dad, Caleb had answered, and Noah walked around to the front of Caleb so they could see each other.

  I’m sorry I yelled, buddy.

  It’s okay, Caleb had said, but it had come out like zoky, unintelligible to anyone else, which meant he was stressed, not taking the time to formulate a motor plan and form his words more clearly.

  Want to go inside? It’s getting dark.

  That’s okay, Caleb had said, but it sounded like thzoky.

  What if we skip dinner and have ice cream? I think there’s mint chocolate chip in the freezer.

  No.

  Mind if I keep you company?

  No.

  Good. Noah had taken another sip of beer, then sat down on the grass, cross-legged. Ralph had come over, sniffing the sweating beer bottle, and Noah stroked the cat’s back. Ralph’s tail curled into a question mark.

  He doesn’t like that. Pet under his chin.

  Okay. Noah scratched Ralph under his chin, and the cat squinched up his face, wrinkling his nose.

  He drooled and purred, Caleb had said, but it was barely intelligible. The letter R was difficult for kids with apraxia and other speech disorders. Noah remembered they were behind on their target words this week and at this rate, they’d never get to accident, badges, antiseptic, or emergency.