Page 56 of House on Fire

Chapter 55 – Tue. Dec. 13

  The morning of our sixteenth birthday we ate cold cereal for breakfast in the mid-December darkness. Exhausted and a little apprehensive, we looked at Dad for a clue. He’d hardly said a word, and seemed tense. We washed the dishes while he disappeared into his room. He came out with an old leather briefcase.

  “Get your coats on. Get your wallets; we’re going for a ride. Bug, bring your purse. Put on your gloves and leave them on.”

  The air was still and bitter cold, and the sky was crystalline black. Hard snow crunched and squeaked under the truck tires. The words from my dream still bounced around in my head as we drove through town. “We chose each other.” It seemed so odd not to be angry anymore. It was almost as if its absence left a hole in me.

  The sun was still an hour from rising when we pulled into the airport. Dad guided the pickup through a gate and out of sight behind a hanger. Jessie exchanged a hopeful glance.

  Dad led us out onto the tarmac. A familiar private plane loomed nearby. Dad greeted a man in the darkness. “Good morning. Are you Lester?” Jessie gripped my arm like a vice.

  “Pleased ta meet ya Mr. Laine. Hi, kids. No luggage?”

  Dad shook his hand. “Just us. Thanks for coming on such short notice.”

  “I brought that form you wanted.” Lester handed him a manila envelope.

  “Daddy, are we...”

  “Hang on, Bug, not yet.”

  We climbed in and took our seats.

  “Okay, folks,” Lester droned, “Please return to your seats and extinguish your cigarettes. Gentlemen, please remove your hats if you have not already done so, and help the ladies with their seatbelts – if requested.”

  We taxied to the runway and got clearance. The engines roared outside the windows and we were almost instantly airborne.

  Jessie crushed my hand in hers. Damn, she was strong.

  “Daddy, are we running away?”

  “No, we’ll be back tonight; we’re taking a day trip to Colorado.” He broke out in a big smile. “Happy birthday.”

  Jessie shrieked in joy, bouncing in her seat and clapping her hands. Lester turned and smiled. Our seatbelts came off and we all hugged.

  “Thank you, thank you!” Jessie laughed, but I couldn’t get a sound out. He chuckled like he used to.

  “You okay, Son?”

  I nodded, but still couldn’t speak for a minute.

  “So I’m going to ask you again. If either of you have even the smallest hesitation or doubt in your mind, I need to know. I won’t be mad – this is way too important to be unsure. Honestly, I’d be very relieved if you want to wait. We’ll just have a nice birthday together, and go home.”

  “I’m nervous and excited, Dad, but this’s what I really want. Jessie, if you have any hesitation, I totally understand. I’d try my best to just be your brother.”

  She looked at Dad, and then deep into my eyes. “He might feel relived, Cory, but if you backed out now you’d break my heart.” Then she added with a wicked smile, “And I’d probably have to break your legs. Thank you, Daddy, but I’ve never been more certain.”

  My brain cells danced in circles. This was amazing. This was real. Our wedding day?

  “I can’t begin...”

  “No need, Cory. Once I ran through all the possibilities, the path was clear. I’m trying to do what I think is best; I’m doing what I need to do.

  “Go ahead and take off your gloves, Bug, and admire your new jewelry if you want. If everything goes well, you can get married today.” Again my hand was crushed, the fingers nearly dislocated.

  “The plan is to fly in this morning, take care of things, and fly home tonight. It might be a long day. Here’s how it works. Because of the time zones, we’ll gain a couple hours on the way there, so it’ll still be early. We go to the county clerk’s office and apply for the marriage license.” He opened Lester’s envelope. “This is the application. Cory, go ahead and fill out the top part. Don’t sign it yet, we have to do that in front of the Register.”

  “Dad? Do we need a consent letter or something from you?”

  “No, I just sign the application here, and here. And we don’t have to wait – they approve it right on the spot.”

  When I was done with the form he opened the briefcase and put the application in a folder. “We’ll all need to show our identification, and whatever supporting documents they need. These are your Social Security cards.” Jess and I put them away.

  Dad handed me some cash. “Um, thanks, Dad.”

  “That money is for the application fees and extra copies of the marriage certificate.” I appreciated that he was going to let me be the one to pay.

  “I have all four birth certificates, yours, Mom’s, and mine, just in case. This was our marriage license. These are your adoption papers, and this one is your Mom’s death certificate.” He offered them to us to look at, but I didn’t even want to hold the last one.

  “But that’s just the license, guys. I hope that part will be done by lunch. I’ve arranged a place for the actual wedding, along with a minister to perform the ceremony. I hope that’s okay.”

  “Yeah, of course.”

  “He’ll sign the license, and mail it back to the court. We’ll get our extra copies in the mail.”

  We nodded.

  “Okay kids, I need you to do something for me.” He pulled out two pieces of paper.

  “What is it?”

  “This is a pre-nuptial agreement.”

  I laughed. “But Dad, we don’t need that. We haven’t got anything to divide. Besides, we aren’t going to…”

  “This is no laughing matter, Son. The divorce rate for young couples is astronomical. Whether you acknowledge it or not, you two probably won’t make it in the long run.”

  Jessie and I searched each other’s eyes. His pessimism surprised and scared us both.

  “Kids, I want each of you to read this carefully. If the terms seem fair, I want you to sign both copies.”

  I looked at the document, written in Dad’s neat printing. It said that if we split up, we agreed not to sue each other for divorce, but to come to a mutual agreement with the help of an arbitrator, Judge Daniel Franks. He’d have a contract written up, and we’d each sign it without changes.

  “I don’t have any problem with this, but I have a couple questions. Why Daniel?”

  “Because it’s a terrible task, and he said he was willing.”

  “Not to be indelicate, but he isn’t a young guy. What happens if he’s not there?”

  “He isn’t going anywhere for a while. If your marriage outlives him, you’ll be able to handle things on your own.”

  “But why are you giving us permission if you think we’ll fail?”

  “Because even though the odds are against you, I have faith in your relationship. I want you to succeed, but I also want you to be realistic.”

  I signed one copy, passed it to Jessie, and then I signed the other copy. It left a cold lump in the pit of my stomach.

  He collected the documents and snapped the case closed, setting it beside his seat.

  “I didn’t like that, Cory,” Jess whispered.

  “Me either, but it’s okay. You’re all I want in the word. The rest is just stuff.”

  He motioned for us to come close. “A few more things.”

  “The marriage certificate you get today is totally, one-hundred percent real and valid where it’s issued. At home it could be challenged – not recognized – because the state laws are different. Of course, if we’re trying to defend it legally, the manure has already contacted the impeller. We’d have to leave on very short notice.”

  “We understand,” Jessie said. “Nobody can know.

  “Dad, this is wonderful, but we could have gone commercial...”

  “Timing and discretion, Cory. We were able to get to the airport before dawn. The truck is out of sight. There were no ticket agents or fellow passengers to not
ice our trip. A chartered jet would’ve been a lot faster, but an out-of-state Piper blends right in. Not much to gossip about there. And we have control of the schedule if there are any snags.”

  He looked up to the cockpit, where Lester was yawning.

  “Is there any detail you haven’t thought of, Dad, I mean...?”

  “I sure hope not. There is one thing I do want to discuss before we get home. Jessie and Cory, you’re going to be man and wife, in your hearts, in my eyes, and in all other ways.” He seemed uncomfortable. “As such, I technically have no right, legally, to tell you what to do, but I’m still the dad here.” He was really struggling with this. “I know that it’s – traditional, and understandable – that a couple would, um, consummate their union on their wedding night...”

  Jessie slapped her hand over her eyes. No wonder he was having such a hard time. I stepped in to rescue him. “Dad, we’re in no hurry,” I interrupted. Jessie looked at me horrified. She clearly had different intentions. “We’re content right now to share a bed, to hold each other, and to wake up together. Right, Jess?”

  “Right?” It was more a question that a statement.

  “I was actually going to ask that you keep using your own beds. I think the deeper you... get involved, the harder it’ll be to avoid...”

  “...Other people noticing, I understand. If you think that’s best, Dad, we’ll try.”

  “No, Cory.” Jessie said. “I can’t promise that. Dad, I respect you, and always want to honor your wishes,” she inhaled deeply, “But I will sleep with my husband.” Her emphasis made it clear she was referring to both interpretations. “My husband, get it?”

  They were two of a kind, and I was caught in the middle. I saw no reason to argue the point at that moment. “Jess, please,” I said. She turned to me with intensity, as if daring me to challenge her. What could I say that wouldn’t just escalate the problem?

  “Jessie, my best friend and today, my wife... listen to my heart.” The fury in her eyes melted a little. “This’s not how I want to start our marriage. Dad’s giving us so much today. I’m not talking about the trip, but his consent and his blessing. This’s the only, the only, the only thing has asked of us in return.” She closed her eyes and lowered her head.

  “Dad, what you’re asking’s far too much to expect of my wife and me.” Jessie’s eyes popped open and Dad set his jaw at this reversal.

  I continued, “But it isn’t an expectation, just a respectful request. What you’re asking for is a huge sacrifice. But... out of love... I’m willing to honor your wishes, at least for tonight. That is, if my wife will agree also.”

  I held out my hands, prompting her. She sighed. “I guess. I agree.”

  Dad glanced at me, obviously uncomfortable with the terms, but unwilling to fight tomorrow’s battle. He had asked, I thought. By giving his consent to marry, Dad had renounced the control that we’d always assumed between us. The balance of power would shift – it already had. At the barest level, he held the money and we held the family. And he’d already made it clear which of those was more important to him. Maybe that should’ve made me feel more powerful, but it actually scared me.

  “Thank you. Both of you. I know this is awkward – it’s hard for me, too. We’ll figure it all out eventually.”

  “Dad,” I said, “I can only imagine how rough all this is for you. It’s easy for us to forget the sacrifices you’re making, too.” He reached out and squeezed my arm.

  That creeping feeling was back, and burning like a hot brand. It came down to this: was it Mom’s idea, or ours? Did she instigate it, or just acknowledge it?

  “Jess?” I hesitated. “I was thinking about when we met, at the orphanage?”

  “What about it?”

  “I had this dream last night... Do you think we picked each other?”

  “I know so. I was so happy that you chose me, Cory.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “When we met. On the playground. I was hoping you’d choose me.”

  So, Jess didn’t think it was Mom’s idea.

  “Did you choose me, too?” I asked.

  “At first sight.”

  I started to cry. I didn’t want to, but I couldn’t stop. All that hate and anger just melted into grief. For the first time in three years I let myself weep for Mom’s loss. Dad looked concerned, but Jessie was nearly panicked.

  “What’s wrong, Cory? Are you okay?”

  I couldn’t answer; the bowling ball in my throat was too big. Jessie just held me and stroked my hair like Mom used to do. That made me cry all the harder. After several minutes I was able to squeak out “Oh my God, Jess – I miss her so much!”

  “Who?”

  “Mom. I wish she was here.”

  “I know, Sweetie, me too.”

  Dad had been watching silently, and now I saw his mouth harden.

  “I’ve been... mad at Mom.”

  “Why?”

  “I blamed her for, like, brainwashing me and making me want you so much, and for... for me being so miserable.” Dad was studying me intensely. “But you’re right. I knew you, even back then. I mean I recognized you.”

  “I knew you too, Cory. You had the nicest, kindest eyes. Still do.” We just held each other for a long time.

  “Dad?” I asked, “What did Mom say to you that day?” He was lost in his own thoughts.

  “About what?”

  “Um, about why you should adopt Jessie.”

  “Huh, I don’t remember if we even discussed the why. It just seemed obvious. You two had already made your decision,” he chuckled. “When you came to live with us we saw how deep it went between you two, and I knew we’d done the right thing. I just never believed it’d come to this. I’ve been trying to figure out if I failed somehow, if maybe I’d taken Mom more seriously we could have avoided such a drastic solution. I just don’t know. But there it is.

  “Kids, I don’t think I ever apologized.”

  :For what?”

  “When Mom died I wasn’t there for you. You were abandoned twice, and I wish that I could have been stronger. I’ve been trying to make up for it ever since. It’s what keeps me going.”

  “Aww,” Jessie said. “That’s so nice of you, and so unnecessary.” She hopped over and gave him a big, cuddly hug.

  “I’m really proud of you kids for getting by without me when you had to. I’m at peace that you’ll be able to handle… becoming adults so young.”

 
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