CHAPTER XXII
A DESPERATE RESORT
In the early days of the Great War, a voyage to India had no terrors forthe travelled. Before the Hun had proved himself a savage in warfare,indifferent to all international laws and the dictates of humanity, theonly anxieties and drawbacks suffered on the way, were those in relationto the risk of encountering mines, or the delays caused by the changingof routes. The nerves of the public had not been harrowed by tales ofatrocities on the high seas, and the nation confidingly believed thatthe glorious traditions of naval warfare were respected even by Germany.It had yet to learn what manner of people the Allies were fighting. Thedifficulties and dangers of a sea voyage only added to the thrill ofexpectancy, and the contingency of meeting with German raiders on theway, was like having a bit of Marryat's novels in real life; fear was anunknown quantity.
As Kitty anticipated, she met with little opposition from her parents inthe matter of her engagement, or of her voyage to India under hersister's chaperonage, with the prospect of a wedding at the end of it.Since she had always managed things her own way, there was little usewasting time in argument. Jack was a very fine fellow indeed, and Kittymight do worse than marry him. At all events, he was the man of her ownchoice.
Accordingly, a trousseau was acquired regardless of cost, and, themoment Jack's orders arrived recalling him to duty--which was towardsthe end of August--trunks were packed, passages were booked, and theparty crossed to France, _en route_ to Marseilles.
Jack's feelings can be better imagined than described. In his wildestdreams he had not hoped for such luck as a speedy marriage with Kitty,and he was rendered, for a time, incapable of coherent thought. Theyboarded the mail boat at Marseilles and settled down as an engagedcouple to enjoy the days at sea to the extent of their capacity.
Beyond an occasional cruiser in the distance, or a destroyer there wasnothing throughout the voyage to remind them of the war; and, from thepoint of view of belligerency, it was both uneventful and calm.
As recognised lovers, Kitty and Jack had the choice of sheltered nooksand were left to themselves, undisturbed, except by camera fiends whosnapped them at embarrassing moments and made themselves generallyobnoxious.
Being absorbed in his happiness, Jack had given no thought to Mrs. Foxwho was awaiting him in Calcutta, till, one day, in the Arabian Sea, theimminent prospect of their meeting filled him with uneasiness andobliged him to consider his position seriously. As far as he knew, shewas expecting to fall into his arms on his reappearance in India. Sheknew nothing of his new-found happiness and was very likely wondering athis reason for having missed so many mails. She would not follow him toEngland since she was aware that all leave was cancelled.
So awkward was the situation, that Jack was greatly disturbed and soughtthe advice of a ship-board acquaintance who happened to be a young manof wide experience in the affairs of the heart.
"I should tell my _fiancee_, in your place," said he. "Put it to herstraight. The great thing is to get your story in before the other has achance to cut the ground from under your feet. That is, if she is thesort to do it."
"She's the sort right enough," said Jack miserably. "She would do it tospite me for breaking my word to her; but--damn it!--I'd rather be shotthan become her husband, now that I am crazy after the sweetest girl inthe world, and she is ready to marry me!"
"Then have it over. It is better than someone telling her at atea-party,--'Didn't he ever confess himself to you?--naughty boy'! andso on. Or the disappointed one butting in with--'Hands off! He ispromised to me!' which is more than likely."
So Jack decided to make his confession, prostrate at her feet,metaphorically.
While the lovers were living in a world of their own, Joyce was learningmany things, chiefly courage and patience. Her fellow-passengers courtedher society; she was considered the loveliest of women; and all combinedto spoil her with flattery and attentions. However, she was too muchabsorbed in her own thoughts, her manner was too cold and aloof to lendencouragement to flatterers who vied with each other in serving her anddisputed among themselves for her favours. She took no real interest inwhat was going on, to realise the half of it; and her indifferencerendered her the more alluring. But Joyce had had a life-long lesson atMuktiarbad, and not being by nature, a flirt, the result was that thechildish coquetries of the past were abandoned for a dignity and reservethat would have satisfied the most jealous of husbands.
She had not cabled to India. A desire to read her fate in her husband'seyes had fixed her determination to take him by surprise. She would thenknow at the first glance whether she were welcome or had ceased to reignsupreme in his heart.
Honor had advised her to cable. But this was entirely her own affair andshe would go through with it. She had a right to expect her husband'slove and loyalty; and this being the case, there could be no objectionto her taking him unawares. Joy does not kill; and if she did not bringhim happiness, it were as well for her not to be deceived. Such was herlogic, which she kept to herself, being too proud to share her doubtswith Kitty.
One day, as she lay in a deck chair, apparently dozing with her bookopen on her lap, she overheard two women gossiping together behind theangle of the saloon. They were talking of friends in Darjeeling, andtheir voices had lulled her into a state of semi-consciousness, till thename "Meredith" made her alive to the fact that her husband was underdiscussion.
"Not the planter, Tom Meredith, but the I. C. S. man."
"Any relation of the pretty creature with us?"
"I am sure I can't say. He is married, I am told, with a wife at home.'When the cat's away, the mice _will_ play,' you know! She is a widow,or passes for one, and neither cares a snap of the finger for the talkabout them. All Darjeeling is scandalised, and that's saying a gooddeal! My friend writes that the woman nursed him while he was ill fromsunstroke in some outlandish station in Bengal, and they becamefearfully intimate. These nurses know a thing or two and can makethemselves indispensable if they like. Men generally find themirresistible. However, it is rather rough on his wife at home, when youcome to think of it."
"What has the nurse to do with him, now that he has recovered?"
"Ah, that's the point! She stays at the same hotel nominally lookingafter a delicate baby whose parents are in the plains; but the kid getsprecious little of her attention. It is left to the ayah's tendermercies while the nurse goes about with Mr. Meredith. They are neverseen apart, and she spends most of her time in his rooms. It puts me inmind of that divorce case you may remember two years ago at Simla,when"--and the conversation was diverted into other channels.
Meanwhile, Joyce was hot and cold with conflicting emotions. Withoutquestion, it was her husband they had been discussing, for he was in theIndian Civil Service, and had been sent to Darjeeling to convalesceafter the sunstroke, which had seized him in the District of Muktiarbad,the "outlandish station" referred to.
By the light of this conversation Honor's letter was explained. She,too, had heard of the doings at Darjeeling, and in her anxiety hadwritten that letter imploring her friend to return.
Well--she was returning, but to what?
Her husband was apparently content to be without her--which wouldaccount for the cable message he had sent her on the outbreak of war,forbidding her to travel.
Joyce rose from her deck chair with a face as white as the foam on thecrested waves, and stumbled to her cabin. "It is nothing," she explainedto fellow-passengers who offered assistance thinking she was likely tocollapse, "only a stupid attack of dizziness--I thought I was a bettersailor, that's all," and she tried to smile.
Kitty was sent to her in hot haste to see what she could do, and wastold the same thing. "I'll be all right after a bit."
"Are you sure?"
"Perfectly," was the assured answer, for Joyce was already determinednot to go down under the blow, but to fight to a finish. Ray--herhusband--false to her? The shame of it--the humiliation, would beunbearable, if what she had heard were true! It
was possible that gossiphad exaggerated the state of things between him and that woman who hadnursed him. Scandalmongers never did give any one the benefit of adoubt. For instance, scandal might have been busy with her own name andthat of Captain Dalton, but she was innocent in act and thought. Shewould not judge hastily; but she would allow no woman to dare to comebetween herself and her husband. He was her own man. God had given himto her, and she was glad she had taken the journey at all costs to putmatters right and send the depraved creature--who was trying to take herplace--about her own business. But if Ray had been false to her--sheknew he could not lie to her--she would....
Joyce seemed to arrive against a blank wall in her mind as she facedsuch an unthinkable problem as Ray's unfaithfulness.
Later in the evening when she returned to the deck having gained themastery over her nerves, it was to find that an unhappy breach had cometo pass between Kitty and Jack.
Dancing was in full swing on the hurricane deck, a band was discoursingdreamy melodies, and Jack with his back to the sea was leaning againstthe taffrail and glowering at the ship's doctor who was dancing withKitty.
As the evening lengthened, it was evident that the latter was bent uponinflicting all manner of snubs and punishments on her distracted loverby the taffrail, which in a certain measure, recoiled upon herself.Finally, when "lights-out" obliged dancing to come abruptly to an end,Kitty retired to her cabin without so much as a good-night to Jack wholooked as if he had come to the end of all things.
"What is wrong?" Joyce asked her before turning into her berth. "Can Ihelp?"
"We've had a disagreement. That is all," said Kitty curtly, lookingwhite and angry. "You have heard of lovers' quarrels, I suppose?"
"There is no need to snap my head off," said Joyce. "I am only sorry tosee it happen. Life is too short for misunderstandings."
"I quite agree with you. But this is not a misunderstanding. I have beendeliberately deceived."
"How do you mean?"
"What's the use of discussing it?"
"There is no use if you are determined not to be helped."
"What can you do? What can any one do? This is a matter which is onlybetween us. I am sorry I did not know all about it before, or I wouldnot have become engaged."
A light dawned on Joyce's mind. "Oh--I see. Jack's been telling youabout his foolishness in the past!"
"You call it foolishness?"
"Wasn't it the height of folly to have been silly about a married woman?and one who isn't worth a thought?"
"It was something worse than folly when it came to his being _engaged tomarry_ her all this time--even when he proposed to me! How dared he doit? How had he the nerve to ask me to be his wife when he knew she waswaiting to marry him on his return to India, having won her decree?"
"I heard she had divorced her husband--the designing wretch! She is aperfectly horrid woman. Poor Jack! I don't wonder at his meaning tothrow her over after knowing you!"
"But to be engaged to two women at the same time!--it is wicked andhumiliating! Why didn't you tell me of her?"
"It is something to know that you have saved him from making the mistakeof his life!"--ignoring the question.
This was an inspiration on the part of Joyce, and Kitty was rendereddumb. Joyce immediately pursued her advantage.
"To have been compelled to marry Mrs. Fox into whose snare he hadfallen, would have been a dreadful thing for poor Jack, who, at themost, is only an overgrown schoolboy without much experience of theworld. I did not tell you of it as I thought it was over and done with."
"As a man of honour, he is bound to keep his word to her and marry heras he said he would,"--obstinately.
"I would rather see him dead. There is no honour about Mrs. Fox or hermethods. She deliberately set out to work this thing, and her punishmentis in your hands. Jack loves you. You have no right to force him intomarriage with a woman who will ruin his life for him."
"I think he has behaved abominably."
"If you are looking for perfection in the man you intend to marry, youhad better make up your mind to live an old maid. Good-night!" andhaving delivered her parting shot, Joyce turned away, feeling no longerthe same childish creature of a few months ago. She had awakened inright earnest.
Needless to say, Jack spent the night in his clothes on deck. Sleep wasimpossible; and, in the hope that she would relent and creep on deck tofind him and retract the hard things she had said, he haunted thecompanion till the stars paled and the day began to break.
But Kitty, though very loving, had a temper that was not easily calmed.Jack had behaved abominably right through, and should not get things allhis own way, she decided, and while relenting inwardly, she maintainedtowards him an attitude of cold disapproval. She had given him back thering--which at that moment was burning a hole in his waistcoatpocket--and had had nothing more to say to him, though, when he was notconscious of the fact, her eyes often dwelt upon him with wistfulyearning. He might deserve punishment, but there was no doubt about it,that he was the only man in the world for her! She loved everythingabout him, from his curly blond head to the soles of his manly feet. Hewas by far the best-looking boy on the ship, and the most simple-minded!Besides, what was unforgettable, he was a prince of lovers! Was shegoing to allow Mrs. Fox to take him?----
Kitty flushed in hot indignation at the thought, but it was right andproper that he should suffer for his weakness and folly. Of course, shewould have to forgive him or be miserable for the rest of her life,but--not yet.
The punishment might have continued for days, if Jack's own precipitancyhad not brought about almost a tragedy.
In the morning he gravitated to his friend again, and in a burst ofconfidence, related the outcome of his having adopted the course thathad been advised. His friend, wise in the ways of women, listened withhis tongue in his cheek. Not being in love, himself, he could afford tosee the humourous side of Jack's trouble. This time he suggested a ruse.
"Excite her pity, my dear fellow. Do something to rouse her heart. It isonly suffering from shock and will come to the scratch when it isstirred by pity. The best thing to do is to get seriously ill. Too muchgrief--mental strain--has brought on a heart attack. Lie down to it andkick up a devil of a fuss. I'll tip the doctor a wink and we'll do it instyle. What do you say to that? When she hears you are on the verge ofheart failure, all through her, she'll fall on your neck and wipe outthe past."
"Go to blazes!--I'm not going to do any play-acting and drag the wholeship into the secret, only to lose any possible chance I might have hadif ever it leaked out."
"Then we'll have to think of something else."
"I think I'll just drop overboard, and end everything," said Jackmelodramatically. "That will show her how I have felt over her treatmentof me!"
"But you'll not be there to enjoy it. Happy thought. Can you swim?"
"Like a fish."
"Good! You can go overboard if she remains relentless, and the thoughtthat she has driven you to commit suicide, will bring her to you weepingand repentant the minute you are restored to consciousness."
"What the devil do you mean?"
"Why just an accident, done on purpose. To all it will appear anaccident. To _her_,--attempted suicide. To you and me, simply bluff.I'll be the first to see you go, and a life-buoy will go after you in atrice. Only let's know when you contemplate bringing it off, so that Ican be stationed near one. There'll be no time lost. 'Man overboard!'and the engines will be stopped, reversed, a boat lowered, and there youare! You'll be fished out apparently drowned--or nearly--and with hotwater bottles and brandy you'll be well enough to see Miss Kitty in yourcabin in half an hour."
"What price, sharks?" asked Jack, to whom the adventure stronglyappealed,--as an adventure, if nothing else. He could imagine thecommotion on the ship, and Kitty, white with anxiety and self-reproach,hanging over the rails as she watched his chances of recovery from thebriny deep.
"Fellows have been known to fall overboard in the Arabian Se
a, and onenever hears of sharks. You'll have to risk it. Take a sailor's knife;then, if you are attacked you can put up a fight till you are pickedup."
All day Kitty avoided Jack and surrounded herself with the callow youthof the vessel. She appeared in high spirits, played deck quoits, and didnot give him a minute's chance to get a word with her, till the idea inhis mind, of attempted suicide, took root and developed after seriousand profound thinking. Something would have to be done. He could notexist another day apart from Kitty, severed from her heart, andcondemned to wear his out in agonies of despair and remorse.
The following morning, after breakfast, Kitty's attitude beingunchanged, Jack hung upon the taffrail, and, surveying the clear,emerald-green waves as they heaved past the sides of the ship,telegraphed with his eyes to his resourceful friend.
The sea was choppy and glittered like jewels in the sunlight. Sea-gullsskimmed the surface and circled in the wake of the steamer, which wastravelling fast, the speed of the engines causing a gentle vibration ofthe decks, while the ratlins trembled in the breeze.
It would require some nerve to plunge into the waves, fully clothed; buthe was in light, deck shoes which could be kicked off; and his coatcould easily be sacrificed in the water. It was an old suit!
Sharks?--
They had seen none since entering these waters. Besides, he was ready totake his chance, or to fight, if it came to the push.
Above all, his act must be made to appear an accident. Kitty, alone,should think as she pleased, being in a position to supply a possiblemotive; and, doubtless, her feelings would be heart-rending.
Jack nerved himself to bring this just punishment upon her obduracy andtook up his position on the taffrail with his back to the sea.
His first act was to note whether Kitty, who was promenading the deckwith a subaltern--called to active service--had any idea of his peril.She had always discouraged his sitting on the taffrail, saying that it"got on her nerves."
Kitty glanced towards him, and with an air of indifference continuedpromenading.
Jack's already sore heart was lacerated. Could there be any sharksabout?
His friend and ally was to be seen idly lounging in the neighbourhood ofa life-buoy suspended against the rails, further aft.
Just as he was about to let go, someone lounging up, remarked on hisunhealthy pallor. "Feeling the motion of the vessel?" he asked Jack, whodid not know what it was to feel sea-sick.
"Not in the least," said Jack wishing him to the devil.
"It must be the smell of kippers. Frankly, I can't stand them. The stinkhangs about all morning, till one feels one is breathing as well aseating kippers."
"They have an unholy smell," Jack agreed, wondering when the fellowwould move on, or whether his inopportune presence was to be taken as awarning not to put his mad intention into effect. He was superstitiousenough to believe in omens.
"I rather like _bumlas_, do you?" was the next remark.
"I don't know--oh, yes, I think they are topping."
"Sort of jelly-substance, and when fried crisp, the last word!"
"Oh, damn!" said Jack aching for him to go.
"What's that?" the man asked, protruding an ear forward. "The wind makesa devil of a noise in these ropes----"
Someone called him off for quoits, and Jack started to tune up hisnerves again for the plunge.
Children ran between him and the line of chairs he faced. He could seeJoyce Meredith listening idly while the ship's doctor talked to her. Atthat moment the subaltern took Kitty's hand in his to examine a ring shewas wearing,--an heirloom, with a story,--and this gave the finalstimulus to Jack's sporting resolve. He was seen suddenly to lose hisbalance, throw out his arms, and disappear over the side.
On the instant there was wild confusion. Chairs were flung back,children shrieked, women fell fainting on the deck. Someone had shouted,"Man overboard!" which was taken up vociferously in every key by, atleast, a hundred throats, and in less than a minute the engines weresilent, the vessel moving only with its headway. Then, with a blast ofsteam, they were reversed. Meanwhile, the after part of the hurricanedeck, and the poop of the second saloon, were packed with eager soulsscanning the surface of the water in the hope of catching sight of theirunfortunate fellow-passenger.
Again the vessel stopped, and a boat was lowered.
"Wonderful presence of mind," the doctor said to Joyce as she, too,anxiously strained her eyes to look for the reappearance of Jack's formin the water, which had been seen, and then lost sight of. "Did you hearhow a fellow kept his head when he saw young Darling go over, sending alife-buoy the same moment after him? Splendid, I call that!"
Joyce was deeply impressed. "He has probably saved Jack's life! Goodman! does any one know where my sister is?"
Kitty was nowhere to be seen. Joyce presently found her in the salooncrouching on a sofa with her hands over her ears.
"He is drowned, I know he is drowned, and I shall never see him anymore! I have killed him just as surely as if I sent him over with my ownhands!--oh, let me die!" She was beside herself, and her suffering wouldnot only have more than healed Jack's injured feelings, but have madehim sue for pardon.
Joyce took her in her arms and they clung together, fearful of what theyshould presently hear. The shrieks of the women and children weremingled with the voices of the men shouting instructions from the deckto the officer in the boat. Nothing definite could be gleaned from theexcited ejaculations of the onlookers.
"What made me do it!--why did I let myself behave so!" Kitty criedshivering from the force of her emotions. "I shall never be able to askhis forgiveness for my hardness, and yet in my heart I was meltedtowards him and longing to tell him so,--only waiting till the eveningwhen we could be more alone. Oh, I am terribly punished for daring topunish my poor Jack!"
"We are not to give up hope, dearest, but are to will with might andmain that he be saved. It all helps. Honor Bright says it isscientifically possible to impose will-power on the forces of nature. Itis a way God works for us and with us."
"It is useless to tell me all that when I cannot even think!" wailedKitty.
"But there is a great deal in heaven and earth that is not 'dreamt of inour philosophy,'" Joyce repeated.
"Oh, my poor Jack!--Go, Joyce, and ask what is happening, now! I cannotbear this stillness." For a sudden hush seemed to have fallen on thecompany on deck.
At that moment, a distant cheer came from over the water. It was takenup by those watching from the ship and loud "Hurrahs!" sounded again andagain.
"Oh, thank God!--he must be safe!" cried Joyce.
Kitty seemed to crumple up as she burst into a passion of tears.
Neither she nor Joyce had any idea that the rescue of Jack Darling was atouch and go. He had gone overboard confident of being able to keepafloat till he was picked up, and willing to accept his fate if itworked out otherwise. Having, in his despair, become temporarily insane,he was hardly accountable for his actions till his immersion in thewaves brought him rudely to his senses. After coming to the surface, helooked about for the steamer, and was astounded to see it already so faraway that it seemed to him impossible for a boat's crew to descry him inthat heaving expanse of ocean. To add to his dismay, the vessel seemedto steam on as though determined to leave him to his fate.
The prospect was horrible!
In a flash, he saw himself swimming till exhausted and a prey to sharks.Life became all at once very dear. Whether with, or without Kitty, itwould be better to live, than to die this slow and lonely death! He hadbeen nothing but a damned idiot to have allowed himself to be draggedinto such a dangerous piece of melodrama, and all for nothing! With alittle patience and perseverance he might have gained his end withoutall this miserable fuss! No abuse was strong enough for his folly.
At that moment he espied the life-buoy, which he was fearing he wouldnever find, and eagerly scrambled into it. Ah, that was better! Thoughhe could swim like a fish, there was no doubt about it that he wasgratef
ul for support in the restless waters. Sometimes he was on the topof a wave where he was able to see the far distant ship; then, with asmart buffeting, he would find himself at the bottom of a trough with,what looked like green mountains of water threatening to engulf him.
It was an immense relief to his mind when it became apparent that thevessel was steaming back on her course, and the sight of the boat beinglowered gave him new life and confidence.
But before it could reach him, symptoms of cramp in one leg had setin--possibly, because of late he had entirely neglected his exercises.The first twinge scared him mightily. If it should increase, he would bedoubled up in the water and, in spite of the buoy, go down like a stone.The prospect racked him with suspense. The cramp again seized him withdemoniacal violence and a red-hot band seemed to tighten round about hislimb....
Was it cramp, or the jaws of a shark?
Petrifying thought!
If ever he had been punished in his life for folly, he was beingpunished now!
He glanced wildly over his shoulder, then at the advancing boat. Hetried to call aloud, but his voice was choked with spray. The painintensified. It seemed to rise into his thigh and the leg felt wrenchedfrom its socket. Surely this was the end? A shark----?
Jack remembered no more. He had fainted with the pain of severe crampcombined with the shock of terror. He had never been wanting in courage,but physical agony, and the notion of falling a prey to sharks before hehad time to show fight, had caused him to swoon.
And it was at that moment that the boat reached him, and eager handssnatched him into safety.
Before the boat reached the ship he had recovered, and after a stiffdose of brandy, was able to take an interest in his rescue.
"I could have sworn a shark had got me," he explained. "The pain was soexcruciating."
"In the water, cramp is the very devil!" said the third officer.
It was a shamed and chastened young man who disappeared into his cabin,amid hearty congratulations, to change into dry garments. In the face ofso much honest relief and thankfulness, he felt a very worm for hisdeceit and trickery. It had been a mean game--a dirty trick he hadplayed everybody, and Kitty in particular; which might easily have costhim his life. Truly, he had come to the conclusion that he was not fitto aspire to any nice girl. Kitty was properly fastidious, and she wasnot to be blamed for having recoiled from his unsavoury story, though ithad been the barest outline of his misdemeanours that he had given her.All the same, it was hardly a yarn for the ears of even modern eighteen!
She being his promised wife, he had felt it due to her to reveal hispast--(lest others should do so!)--and he had no right to rebel againsther verdict, however blasting to his life and happiness--and so on, andso forth.
In downright self-disgust he kept his cabin, pleading the effects ofcramp and exhaustion, and emerged only when it was dark, to drop into adeck chair behind a windlass, and brood upon his sins, staring out uponthe moonlit sea.
Here Kitty came to him with healing, and here we take our leave of themfor the present, feeling perfectly sure that Jack was not likely todamage his chances of reconciliation by any further confessions,--noteven concerning his latest and maddest adventure. Confession may be goodfor the soul, but Jack had learned that there are circumstances when itis better to be silent.