CHAPTER IV. ALI PEPE'S LITTLE HARVEST.

  ALLEGRIGNAC, Porc-en-Truie. Mont-Rognon, and Maragougnia continued todwell in unconscious propinquity.

  "Who can tell what has become of my companions?" said all four, eachto himself. "They have perished beyond doubt, or are prisoners at best.Faith! that's their look-out! Success is very properly the prize ofsuperior intelligence."

  For a whole month Porc-en-Truie slept, Mont-Rognon ate, Allegrignacplayed the guitar in a whisper, and Maragougnia plotted impossiblemeannesses.

  On the twenty-eighth day of his captivity Mont-Rognon greeted Ali witha smile which he struggled to make as gracious as possible. Ali wasterrified to see it, dreading lest his customer should ask him forcredit on the strength of such an act of condescension.

  "Sit down here opposite to me," said Mont-Rognon, growing every momentmore agreeable to Ali, who was growing every moment more uncomfortable."I am tired of eating alone. Besides, I have something to say to you."

  The landlord sat down, poured himself out a bumper, and listened.

  "Since I have been here I have watched you closely, and the result ofmy examination is favourable to you. Occupied as I have been, it wasimpossible for us to exchange much talk, but it was enough to makeme appreciate you. I recognise in you one of those bold spirits who,regarding life as a journey, reject from the outset whatever mayencumber their progress. Conscience is to them a stranger whose namegives rise to a smile, and remorse a bugbear invented by the weak torestrain the strong. They only require in life that which it is able tooffer, but they are not of the kidney to forego one single opening forenjoyment, let the price be what it may. People of my way of thinkingare always ready to encourage that spirit. Do you comprehend?"

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  "That depends on what is to follow. I'll tell you presently. Go on!"

  "I travel, as you have been told, in the gastronomical interests ofvarious sovereigns. One of them, whose name I choose to withhold, hassent me to this country with a mission so truly extraordinary that Idread to impart it to you."

  "Fear not, sir. I flatter myself I shall understand you."

  "The king, whose envoy I am, has a daughter as fanciful as she isbeautiful, and he is the slave of her lightest caprice. She has read insome writer of this country that the Saracens owe the clearness of theircomplexion to a peculiar ointment. I am really afraid to tell you ofwhat it is composed."

  "Don't be afraid of anything with me, sir."

  "Well, then, they say that one must have, to make it properly, a humanhead----"

  "Ah?" said Ali, pushing back his chair; "you are terribly plain tounderstand,--rest assured of that!"

  "They assert that for this purpose the heads of the inhabitants of theseparts are superior to all others. I have unluckily promised to procureone, and if I fail to keep my word, my own head, for lack of better,will have to serve the princess's turn. They persuaded me that toensure the preservation of the beauty of young girls was an act ofphilanthropy, and I foolishly committed myself to the undertaking. Ioffer with all my heart one-half of the sum promised me to any one whowill assist me out of my scrape."

  "And how much have you been promised?" said Ali, bringing his chair tothe table again.

  "A hundred ounces. Do you know any respectable man of business who willundertake to supply such an article as I have named?"

  "Possibly--but all trouble deserves payment. If I act as your go-betweenshall I get nothing?"

  "Your claim is a fair one. I promise you fifty ounces--twenty-five forhim, and twenty-five for yourself."

  "You shall have what you require."

  "To-morrow?"

  "This evening! But you must pay me half in advance. If you were tochange your mind, and leave me with the goods on my hands----"

  "Between men of honour--"

  "Between men of honour like us it is right to take precautions."

  "Well! There's the money."

  Ali Pepe took the gold, counted it, tried each coin in succession,weighed them with an air of wisdom, and said, quietly, "The money isquite correct; you shall have just the sort of article you want; and,what is more, I'll throw you the sack in!" With these words he left theapartment.

  It was Allegrignac's lunch-time; so the host went up-stairs to thecount's room, and found him plunged in deep thought.

  "Tell me, Ali Pepe," said he, "did you ever happen to be married?"

  "Never, sir. I am the oldest representative of a race which will diewith me."

  "Then you cannot understand my sufferings!"

  "Your sufferings, my dear sir?"

  "My heart is bursting, and I feel I can trust myself with you. Listento my history, and sympathise with your unhappy guest. My early life waspassed in bliss on the shores of the Sarmatian Sea, till one day I metthe daughter of the King of Scandinavia. This marvel of the North had askin as white as snow, hair as golden as sunlight, and she was as plumpas a partridge. Her beauty dazzled me, and I swore I would die to serveher----"

  "Your worship will excuse me if I beg you to commence your history atthe conclusion. I have several customers waiting below."

  "I will be brief. It is the custom in certain cold regions for everyyoung girl who has reached her seventeenth year to make a tour fora couple of months to look out for a husband. Those who make anyimpression on her, or on whom she makes an impression, accompany herhome to her father, who then makes his choice among the suitors. Thefair Wahallaaka had just reached her seventeenth year, when I fell inwith her at the close of the circuit. My attention was first attractedby the splendour of the sledge in which she rode. It was drawn by thirtywolves, which shook the crimson silk tassels and jingled the steelchains of their harness. Seven hundred and sixty-seven suitors rodebehind her. The eyes of the fair Scandinavian met mine, and she felt atonce that her journey was completed. Could she meet with a more suitablehusband? She was not foolish enough to suppose so; and, giving me asign to join the _cortege_, she gave the order to return toKhetakous-Mouvoskaia, which is the capital of her father's dominions.He, a man full of judgment and taste, confirmed his daughter's choice,and it was decided that at the expiration of two months I shouldbecome the husband of the beauteous Wahallaaka. For fifty days we hada succession of festivals. Sledge races by torchlight were followed byballs and concerts. White bear-hunting, whale-catching, and a thousandother innocent diversions, furnished me with opportunities for thedisplay of my brilliant intelligence, my strength, my courage, myaddress, my presence of mind, my grace, my agility, my----"

  Ali Pepe threw an imploring glance at Allegrignac.

  "I will be brief. Nothing in this world is perfect, and the incomparableWahallaaka had her share of imperfections. She was given to flirting andfibbing: she was fickle, she was foolish, she was vain, she was rash."

  "Sir!" sighed the count's wretched listener.

  "I will be brief. You are right; why should I open again thesescarce-healed wounds? A page one day brought me a letter from my futurebride. 'Go,' it said; 'leave me, to prove your love for me. Theties which are about to unite us are so serious that I wish, beforeconfirming them irretrievably, to assure myself that I have not beenmistaken in my choice of you. Go; during your absence I intend to givemyself, without reserve, to all the pleasures of society. I shalldo everything I can to forget you, and if in a year's time, when youreturn, I still love you, then, my knight, I will be your bride. Youwill go to Spain. I do not give you that Eden for your place of exilewithout good reason. They assert that the men there are the handsomestin the world. Well, my betrothed, when your time comes to return, chooseone of the finest of these wretches, cut off his head, and bring it tome, that I may judge with my own eyes of the beauty of the barbariantype.'"

  "Well done!" thought Ali; "here are my four guests beginning again. Ineverything they do they follow suit, and I feel sure the other two willmake the same request. What is to be the end of this?"

  "'Should you triumph in this trial,' added the fair Wahallaaka, 'fromthat moment none shall be
as dear to me as you.' When I read this lettermy heart was torn with conflicting passions, but I had the strength ofmind to leave without seeing my beloved. For a whole year I dragged outmy miserable existence in all quarters of the globe. Now, however, mytime of trial is past, and I am about to return to my beloved country.One thing alone remains to do. Can I present myself to her, who is sodear to me, without offering her that head which is the object of herdesires?"

  "But how is it that, brave and mighty as you describe yourself to be,you have not already procured it?"

  "The reason is clear, as you will see. I am in the ordinary affairs oflife a very lion for courage; the panther and white bear I care not ajot for; but as soon as the idea of fighting presents itself---wheneverI find myself in the presence of danger--I tremble, lest I should proveunworthy of the fair Wahallaaka. The thought unnerves my arm, and achild might conquer me. In short--I'll give you forty ounces for yourhead."

  Ali scowled at the knight. "If it be to finish in this manner that yourworship has taken the trouble to relate this history, we might both ofus have employed our time better."

  "If your head appears to me the finest model of Oriental beauty, thereis no reason for you to be offended. You appear to be attached to it',well, let's say no more about it, but get me for the same price someother specimen of the Asiatic tribes."

  "How much did you say you were willing to give?"

  "Forty gold pieces."

  "You won't get anything worth looking at for that sum? Everything hasrisen in price since the war."

  "Well, then, fifty pieces."

  "Say sixty pieces--thirty down, and I'll promise you the best that canbe had."

  "I am anxious to start, remember."

  "You shall have what you want by to-morrow."

  "Very well! I rely upon you to keep your word."

  Ali, as soon as he had the thirty pieces safe in his pocket, wentdownstairs, and entered the apartment of the knight of Machavoine.Porc-en-Truie was not asleep.

  "I thought so," said the innkeeper to himself; "here's the sleeper aswide awake as a squirrel," and he made as if he would go out again.

  "Come in," said the knight, "I have something to talk to you about."

  "I am all attention," said Ali, bowing.

  "I leave to-morrow!"

  "So soon?" said Ali, looking at his long-lost bed with affectionateinterest.

  "That depends on you. Travellers like to carry away some littleremembrance of places they have visited, and I have too much reason tobe pleased with my treatment here not to keep up the custom. What do youadvise me to get? You see, you must aid me in choosing, for I haven'tstirred out, and know nothing about the place."

  "Our grapes are very fine here in the north of Spain. Possibly----"

  "No. That won't do. I want something that will keep."

  "The young girls of our country come from ten leagues round to Alagonto buy plated gold and silver trinkets, and necklaces of seed-pearl andcoral."

  "You must find out something better than that."

  "Your worship puzzles me. The country has nothing else remarkable tooffer except its inhabitants; but, of course, I could not offer you oneof our people to take away."

  "That's a notion! It suggests an idea to me--only it is so peculiar Ihardly like to mention it."

  "Pshaw! a little shyness will soon wear off."

  "I'll give you a thousand guesses, and you'll puzzle your brains over itin vain to all eternity."

  "Then, sir, don't let me have to guess."

  "You say your knaves here are handsome?"

  "They have adorable almond-shaped eyes, red lips, white teeth, andcomplexions of a delightful olive, covered with black down."

  "You only speak of their heads."

  "I have a reason for doing so, for it is the only good thing theypossess; for which reason our girls are accustomed to say, 'The heart ofCastile, the soul of Catalonia, the form of Leon, the limbs of Navarre,and the head of Arragon make a perfect man.'"

  "By my faith! the idea is a jolly one, and I must give you all creditfor having been the first to think of it."

  "Your honour is too good. You accredit me with more spirit than Ipossess."

  "Since you originated the notion, you must assist me to put it intoexecution. Well, then, how can you get me the head of an Arragonese?"

  "What! you wish to take away a real head--a living head?"

  "Living is scarcely the word--but a head that has been alive."

  "Well, that is an idea that no one has had before you."

  "I hope so."

  "Our country, sir, is a wonderful one, for this reason--that you can getwhatever you want, provided you have the money. If, therefore, you willallow me to manage----"

  "Do so, and do so quickly. That is all I require, and I shall leaveto-morrow."

  "I must have thirty pieces of gold in advance. The game you want isstrictly preserved, and difficult to procure, Nothing inspirits thehunter so much as to be paid ready money."

  So Ali added thirty more pieces to the sixty he had already received,and hastened off to hide it in a secret spot known only to himself.

  "Now I'll go and see my fourth customer. I am curious to learn what hehas to propose to me."

  Maragougnia had not during the whole month left the horrid little holewhich he had chosen for his lodgings. Anxious to make a profit by hisisolation, he had spent the time in _deshabille_, in order to save hisclothes. When Ali entered he found the knight patching his shirt withhis pocket-handkerchief. "You come just at the right moment; I wish tospeak to you."

  "I am listening."

  "I hope you will not take amiss what I have to say to you, normisunderstand my intentions. I think I ought first of all to tellyou that I am even more wretched than I look. You will understand, ofcourse, that it is not from a feeling of greed that a man denies himselfeverything as I do. I should certainly not despise the good things oflife if I had the means of getting them. Picture to yourself that mymisery is such----"

  "Excuse me," said Ali, sharply; "I see that you are going to take anhour in framing a demand which could be expressed in a few seconds. I amquite willing to give up my time to those who pay me, but you are eithertoo poor or too stingy to justify my so doing. You want a Saracen'shead, and you are afraid to ask for it."

  "Good heaven! who could have told you that?"

  "You yourself."

  "I? When?"

  "You talk in your sleep, sir, and are more communicative then than whenyou are awake. I sleep in the stable close by, and have overheard you.Now that you see I am so well informed as to your wants, let's settlethe matter at once."

  Maragougnia became infinitely whiter than his shirt.

  "I can procure you what you want. But you must understand perfectly thatit is not a stock article, so I must have a good price. Fifty pieces ofgold down, and fifty more to-morrow on delivery."

  Maragougnia fell fainting on the floor. Ali feared for a moment that hehad gone too far. The knight's heart no longer beat, his body was icycold, his breathing had stopped.

  "Come, come!" said Ali, "recover yourself. You shall have it forninety-five pieces, or say ninety, in consideration of my having waitedon you for a month."

  The Count de Riom did not stir.

  "Well, we will fix it at eighty-five, but I won't abate a penny."

  The knight opened his right eye.

  "Come, I am less hard than I look," said the innkeeper, rubbingMaragougnia's hands. "I will make you an offer."

  The dying man opened his other eye.

  "Must you have a head? because---I'll tell you what, I have an order fora head on hand, I'll let you have the remnant cheap."

  The knight closed his eyes again, and sank back motionless.

  "That doesn't suit you? Well! say no more about it. I am going to showyou how willing I am to serve you by lowering my demands." The knight'seyes re-opened, and his heart began to beat again.

  "Say eighty pieces, but I shan't come down any lower."
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  Ali rose to go. Maragougnia gave a heavy sigh, that would have softenedthe heart of a famished tiger, but made no impression on the innkeeper.

  "Eighty pieces of gold! Why, it is more than I should spend in eightyears. You'll reduce me to beggary."

  "Pshaw! you are no better off now."

  "You might as well take my life."

  "You may accept my offer or leave it. People don't buy things of thissort every day. Will you have it?--Once!"

  "I'd rather die."

  "Twice!"

  "Ten pieces--I'll give you ten pieces."

  "Thrice!"

  "Wait a minute! one must take time to think over, such bargains."

  "Well, I'll come back presently, but I vow you will regret not havingtaken my offer at once."

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  Ali went out, leaving Maragougnia pale, trembling, broken-hearted, aprey to a thousand conflicting emotions.

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