Well that didn’t buy her shit. “About everything.”
“That’s helpful.”
“Well, it’s true.”
“Can you start with one item?”
She chewed on her lower lip. “You,” she said.
“What about me,” he muttered, like he was sure this wouldn’t be good.
“I’m… not sure… how…” She let out a breath when all her straining produced nothing.
“How what?”
“That’s a lot of help,” she muttered. When he didn’t respond, she blurted. “How to feel about you.” She clenched her eyes tight, waiting for the rejection. When he didn’t say anything, she opened them. “I don’t know how to feel about you,” she said plainly.
“I understood.”
“Okay,” she said, waiting for some kind of direction to go in. He gave her endless silence. “Thank you for that input,” she muttered.
“What do you want me to say?”
“I don’t know. Something.”
More agonizing silence before he dropped the bomb. “You love my fucking brother, does that help you?”
She lay there, feeling her instincts preparing for attack. “No, it doesn’t, actually.”
“Why wouldn’t it?”
The disgust in his tone turned her stomach. “You think I’m a whore now?”
“You called it, not me.”
“I said I was confused.”
“Oh, that’s real cute Sin. You want to betray my brother and you’re calling it confused? Fucking priceless, Sin.”
She grunted her way to sitting, looking at his face, the only thing visible in his black thermal underwear. “I’m not the only one confused, either.” That was the facts whether he liked them or not.
“Well, I won’t argue there, Sin.”
“Stop calling me that.”
“Sin is the name we agreed on, or do you want to just change your mind on that too?”
“That was because Reginald was here. Now, he’s not.”
“Reginald is coming back so I’ll call you Sin, like we all agreed.”
She sat there, her anger slowly growing. “You’re back to being yourself, I see. A dick.”
“And you’re back to being a whore.”
“Oh, fuck you.”
“That’s your forte, Sin. Only you’re not fucking me because unlike you, I care about my brother.”
She shot out a laugh at his fucking nerve. “Do you? Do you really?”
“Yes, I damn well fucking do.”
“Because earlier you were all bent out of shape when I told you I pretended when fucking you and now you’re a saint? You’re a hypocrite is what you are. And a liar.”
“What am I lying about?”
“You’re the one pretending here.”
“God, you make me sick,” he muttered, not listening. “Thank God he’s not here, is all I can say.”
Pain gripped her every muscle, and she fought to hold on to her anger rather than give in to the stupid tears. She wasn’t crying for this bastard. “He is here,” she said with a shaky voice. “He’s here, and he never left.” She nodded, turning more toward him. “You’ve taken him, and you’ve hidden him. You said yourself you hid him when there was danger and now there’s danger, so you’ve hidden him, that’s what you’ve done.”
“I’ve hidden him?” he said, in disbelief. “Do you even hear how crazy you sound? That I could somehow hide him, an actual person? Inside me?” He shot out a derisive snort. “You sound just like them fuck-quacks that tried to pin me with multiple personality disorder all because they can’t understand or explain our bond. Poor them and poor you. I’m sorry to break it to you, but reality isn’t arbitrated by your stupidity. Reginald is real, and he lives inside me. He is in control of when he comes and goes, do you think,” he jerked viciously on the chain “that if I was in charge, I would be here, tied to this fucking bed, with a whore, that pretended to
love [LB1] my brother?”
“Using the big words now, huh? Pulling out your big guns?”
“And do you think,” he went on, ignoring her, “that if I was in control, he would not be right fucking here? With me!” he roared, yanking the chain again.
She turned away and swiped her tears.
“Oh fuck, you’re going to cry now. What a show you are. And danger?” He shot an exasperated laugh. “The only danger here is you.”
She fought to swallow her emotions and catch her head. “Love,” she shot out, remembering.
He lay there, speechless. “Christ almighty,” he muttered, like she’d come full circle in her lunacy.
“Don’t act like its stupid.”
“Oh it is. It is soooooo stupid.”
“You’re afraid of love,” she challenged, bolder.
“I don’t give a fuck. A ffffuck,” he repeated, “about love.”
She shook her head, not looking at him. “I-I think when you engaged with me, it did something inside you.”
“Oh, you fucking wish, don’t you? Is that what you’ve been up to all this time? Of course,” he said, in disgust.
“What are you talking about?”
“You wanted a shot with the bad man,” he said, more sure now. “The daddy that never wanted you? You wanted a chance to show him you were worth something? Show him how precious you really are? No, no, no,” he whispered. “You! You’re the one who drove him away, didn’t you? By letting him see how much you looooooved and wanted more than anything to fuck his brother!” he roared at the last.
She covered her ears. “That’s not true!”
“Lying whore!” he fired back. “Un-cuff me! I can’t stand to be near you.”
She stared at him through tears. “Un-cuff you,” she strained. “Un-cuff the bastard lunatic that hates my guts? Ha!” she yelled at him. “Big HA HAAAAAAAA! I don’t think so!”
She slammed herself back down and fought to get under the covers. “I’m going to sleep!” She jerked her head toward him. “And you can lay there awake all goddamn night for all I care, but I will be sleeping. Soundly!” she sobbed, facing the wall now. “Because I’m tired! I am damn tired,” she said, pulling the covers tight under her chin. He wasn’t going to do this. Not to her. She fought her way to sitting up then jabbed a finger at him. “And I hate you! And I did pretend with you! I pretended to not like it when I loved it! Because I’m a whooooooooore!” she screamed in his face. “A stupid, fat, Cinderella whore! Fucking and fucking and praying that one of these mother fuuuuuuckers,” she screamed, slamming her fists into his chest. “Would be a real man! And he was! Reginald was and you bastard!” She pummeled his chest again. “You took him from me!”
She choked back sobs as he lay there, glaring at her, his breaths coming in quick blasts. “Undo me,” he whispered. “And I’ll show you what I do to whores.”
CHAPTER TWENTY
Her breath left her in a single gasp. She quickly scooted down the bed and tripped her way to the dresser. “You show me,” she said, grabbing the key and limp-racing to the bed. “You show me what you do to whores.” She punched his shoulder twice and a third time, shaking with rage before shoving the key into the lock on the bed. “You prick, you show me what you do,” she said between breaths, wiping the tears on her shoulder.
She unlocked his cuffs and stepped back, waiting for it, waiting for him to take his best shot. “Come on,” she yelled as he yanked the restraints off and came at her.
She fought the wall of muscle suddenly latched around her, kicking and screaming when he lifted her with a growl. She was airborne but her panic didn’t have a chance to kick in as she bounced on the bed and he yanked down the thermal pants, stripping her in one tug. He was on her again, pulling her top up and tearing it off, his nails taking skin as he did. She tried to think as he shoved, then flipped her. She grunted for air under the weight of his body, pressing into her back. She cried out when he grabbed her by the hair and jerked her head up. “I’ll show you hate,” he grit.
/>
****
Bones fought with the rage and pain, needing it to put out his fucking arousal that was suffocating his muscles. He needed to shake it, shake her hold on him. He flipped her over, shoving his leg between hers. The gasp she blasted out added fuel to the wrong fire. “Look at me.”
She shook her head, keeping her eyes shut tight. “I can’t, I can’t.” He gripped her face in his hand, holding her still. “Do it,” she strained, tears pouring out of her closed eyes. “Kill me, Bones, I don’t want to live.”
He pulled back to get away from the feel of her breath, the burn of her words. Why? Why did everything she say to him have so much power over him?
He stared at her, searching for the truth that fed his rage, his leg pushing between hers, ready to prove what a whore she was. She finally pushed back and his rage descended like a storm. But the barbaric lust following, barreled through everything. He shoved his leg harder against her pussy and she began to fight again. He grabbed her hands and pinned them above her head, grinding his cock into her thigh. God, fuck. His breaths came in growls as she met his gaze with a fire in her green eyes, desperate for and terrified of what was coming. Of what she couldn’t fight.
“Stop, stop,” she cried with her lying mouth while her eyes begged for more. Her hips moved and met his thrusts, her gasps coming harder. “Bones,” she whispered, losing.
“I’m going to fuck you like a whore, that’s what you are, that’s what you get,” he whispered, shoving his flannel pants down. In one move, he slid his cock in hard and deep.
Her shriek was followed by desperate pants of ecstasy that fed the eager mouth of his lust. He rose up, holding her arms above her head and slammed his cock in her.
“Bones,” she gasped. “Oh God, oh God,” she thrashed her head.
He stared at her mouth then dove on it, kissing her. She opened, and he growled with more hunger. “You want it,” he gasped, flicking his hips faster, harder.
“Yeeeeess!” she screamed, grabbing his face and pulling him down to the cries blasting from her lips. “Yes, oh God, Bones, fuck me. I love you, I love you.”
The words hit like a cannon-ball on a flimsy chessboard, obliterating the entire battlefield in one blow. She took command and captured his body, dragging it to her fortress in that terrifying light. His mind kicked and screamed even as it clawed to reach that forbidden place.
He finally closed his eyes and surrendered to her, letting her suck his breath and reason from him, his fears and guilt, the demons in his soul. She faced them all, she commanded them. “Winter!” he gasped, clutching her tightly as she forced him to go there. To that place where darkness should never go, can never be.
****
The pain in Winter’s neck and back woke her. She fought to turn and remember what was happening. Her body screamed in pain and memory. Bones.
Her heart hammered at remembering what had happened. She lifted her head to see the clock. Three in the morning. Shit.
Alarm hit her when she realized Bones wasn’t there. She jerked up and screamed at the dark shadow sitting on the bed. She reached for the lamp and turned it on, gasping. “Shit! Bones, you scared me. What are you doing?”
He didn’t answer her right away. “Watching you.”
She fought to sit up and winced.
“You’re in pain?”
“God, am I ever. My neck and back are killing me. I need something strong to take.”
“I’ll go see what I can find.”
She collapsed back down, moaning again. “Thank you.” She watched as he left out, her heart hammering. He was only wearing those black briefs and dear God almighty she could rape that man. But why was he up watching her? What was he thinking about? She didn’t have it in her to fight with him again. Not ever again. But his tone… didn’t seem like he wanted to fight. There was something different in it, some kind of peace maybe. Hopefully.
He returned with something in his hand. “I found this. For muscles.”
Shit, she’d meant like drugs. “Oh… thank you,” she said, unable to keep from devouring his body. Her stomach clenched at seeing his dick was bulging in his underwear.
“Turn over,” he instructed. “Where do you hurt the most?”
She jerked her gaze to his, fidgeting at where this was headed. Him touching her while not really knowing how he felt about her, if he was still angry… it didn’t sit right with her. “My neck, shoulders and back. Hurts like a bitch,” she grumbled, turning over. “Nothing I can’t live with though. I’ve had worse. And I forgot to tell you.”
He sat on the bed. “What?” he wondered, his tone soft with curiosity.
“You should’ve seen what they looked like.”
“Who?”
“The ones who hurt me.”
“Ah.” He slid the covers down and she couldn’t stop from grabbing them.
“I’m just moving them to your hips,” he said, sounding confused. She let them go, trying to relax.
“Okay,” she whispered, her body trembling in pain and fear.
His barely touches felt like torture. “So many bruises,” he muttered. She heard him rubbing his hands together. “I’m going to touch you now.”
She fought not to make a sound but a tiny strained breath escaped as he placed both hands on her lower back and slowly, softly slid them up. The feel of his large warm hands on her was better than any pill or drug. When he reached the top of her shoulders, he spread his fingers wide and moved back down. She tensed when his fingers reached low near her breasts.
“Dear God,” she whispered.
“Too hard?”
“Noooo,” she moaned. “You missed your calling as a masseur.”
He reached the bottom of her back and rolled his thumbs in circles at the perfect spots.
“Jesus, that’s amazing,” she couldn’t help murmur. She also couldn’t stop all the other sounds of ecstasy. Felt sooooo amazing. Some spots he touched began to have a direct effect on her privates. He moved his thumbs up her spine, working the muscle between each vertebra. Dear God, yes. Except those electric pulses were growing more frequent in her whore bits.
At her shoulders, he focused on the muscles along her neck, bringing more of the wrong sounds and feelings. He slid his hands back down, going extra slow near her breasts, his fingers dipping between her arms and sides. A soft sound slipped out, and she bit her lower lip.
“Can you move your arms?”
Move her arms? No, that was a bad idea. She slid them slowly up next to her head, holding her breath. He got back to his magic, moving up her sides, the tips of his fingers so low they had to be touching the bed. He paused at her breasts this time, his fingers drawing delicate circles where the mounds pushed out, sending electric currents to lick on her clit.
She lowered her arms, not ready for things to go farther, not till she knew where his mind was.
He paused in his administrations.
She lay there, waiting to see what he’d do, growing angry with each second. Was he going to quit now that she wouldn’t let him molest her? She turned on her elbow and glanced at him. “We can’t,” she said. “I’m not going to be a sex toy.”
“A sex toy? Is that what you are?”
“Ohhhhh,” she muttered, her eyes squinting at his clueless act. “Don’t even do that.”
“Do what?”
“You know what, you know what you’re doing,” she pointed at him.
“I was massaging you and then you stopped me.”
She gave a light snort. “Look who’s the liar now. You were touching me inappropriately and you know it.”
“I was touching you the way I wanted to. Didn’t you want it?”
She thought about how to answer that. “I won’t lie to you, after what we shared, I do want it. But not like that.”
“Yes, you do want it,” he said, agreeing. “And what did we share?”
“You know what I want. I want what you want, but not for the same reasons.”
“And what reason is that?”
“Mine or yours?”
“Both.”
She opened her mouth then closed it, squinting at him. “I can’t.”
“You can’t tell me?”
“I can’t tell you. And I can’t touch you. And you can’t touch me.”
“Why not,” he asked. “I’m just curious.”
“You’re a fucker, that’s why.”
“A fucker,” he muttered, putting a hand on the bed and leaning on it with a grin. “I like that term.”
“I’m sure you do. Because you’re a fucker, you fuck. That’s it. Like all the men I was forced to be with. And no matter how good you look, smell, and taste, no matter if I am dying for it,” she said with eyes closed “I won’t do it.”
“You won’t,” he mused, sounding unconvinced.
She gave him a wary look. “No. I won’t.”
“You won’t,” he repeated, clearly less convinced.
“Stop,” she held up a hand. “You don’t want me, you just want to fuck.”
He raised his brows. “I do very much want to fuck. You.”
“Please,” she whispered, shaking her head at what she was seeing in him. “Don’t even think it.”
“Think of fucking you? It’s all I can think about at the moment.” The look in his eyes burned through the cover she clutched, sucking the oxygen from her.
Shit. She fought to get more air. “I understand. I honestly do.”
“You do, yes, because you feel the same.”
“No, I don’t want to just fuck you.”
He seemed oddly curious, like he might actually care. “What else do you want?”
But this was Bones. Not Reginald. “Nothing.”
“You just said you wanted more.”
“No, I didn’t.”
He drew back like she was beginning to annoy him. “You clearly said you didn’t just want to fuck me, which means you want to fuck me in addition to something else. What is that something else? You want me to only fuck you? You want commitment, marriage? Children? Happily Ever After?”
Why was he asking like somebody who intended to make a purchase? She shook her head slowly at him. “I don’t want just… a body,” she finally gushed, afraid of the words.