I glanced at her and she knowingly smiled, cocking her head to the side.

  “She around?”

  “No, honey, she’s not.”

  I nodded. “Listen, I know she don’t wanna see me. I don’t blame her, either. But I gotta talk to her, Laura. Can’t go on like this anymore. I miss the hell out of her.”

  “I know. She misses you too, Creed.”

  I smiled, needing to hear that. “Can I see her? Please.”

  She shook her head. “Honey, she’s not here.”

  “Where is she? I’ll go find her. Just tell me where she is. Need to make things right, Laura.”

  “She’s in New York.”

  I jerked back not expecting her to say that. “New York? What she doin’ there?”

  “She’s living with her daddy now.”

  “Livin’?” I questioned, feeling as if she kicked me in the balls.

  The news hitting me fucking hard.

  She nodded, muttering, “She moved there about two weeks ago. She just… she just needs some time, Creed,” she paused, letting her words sink in. “You really hurt her. Broke her heart, she wanted a fresh start. Her daddy has been begging her to come back to New York for years. You know that.”

  Shaking my head, I scoffed out, “She wanted away from me. I did this.”

  Laura didn’t say a word, knowing I was right. I didn’t think twice about it. My mind was made up the second she said Autumn was in New York.

  “He still live in lower Manhattan, off of Parks?” I asked, stepping back. Making my way back over to my bike.

  “Yes.”

  I spoke with execution, “You tell her I’m comin’ for her.”

  I spent the rest of day, getting everything in order with the club. Letting them know I was taking a much-needed vacation. Pops wasn’t happy about it, but what could he do…

  I was a grown-ass man.

  I took a redeye flight, wanting to get to her, as fast as possible. I was going to fight for her and if that didn’t work, I was ready to drag her ass back home, kicking and screaming if I had to. Using any means necessary.

  She didn’t belong in New York.

  She belonged by my side.

  By the time I landed, I was fucking exhausted. Almost passing out on the cab ride to my hotel. The Residence Inn Downtown Manhattan wasn’t far from where she lived. I knew this part of New York pretty well, having spent a lot of summers and holidays with her family. Autumn loved showing me everything and anything she could, even the shit that bored the absolute hell out of me.

  After I checked in just after three in the morning, I took a shower. Cleaning up from the late flight. Before hitting the sack, I sat out on the balcony, smoking a cigarette. Looking at the bright lights of the city that never sleeps. I always loved New York at night. There was something about the scenic view only Manhattan could provide. Breathing in a deep drag off my cigarette, I could physically feel the energy all around.

  Wanting to get a few hours of sleep before seeing Autumn, I finally passed out about an hour later. My phone rang, waking me up early the next morning.

  I reached over, grabbing it off the nightstand not bothering to see who it was.

  “Yeah?” I groggily answered, wiping the sleep away from my eyes.

  “Creed! Creed! Oh my God! Are you here in New York?” Autumn hysterically wailed into the phone.

  I shot up out of bed, feeling as if my heart was in my fucking throat. All I could hear were emergency sirens all around her, cars honking their horns, and people screaming.

  “Autumn! What’s goin’ on? You all right? Where are you?” I frantically asked, throwing on clothes and my boots. Hurrying around the room, grabbing my wallet and room key, ready to head out the door. Needing to get to wherever she was.

  “My mom told me you were coming. I didn’t believe her. I can’t believe you’re here. You’re really here?”

  “I’m here, babe. Now tell me where you are?” I asked, trying to remain calm.

  “Oh God, Creed… Turn on the news! Just turn on the news, right now! I’m in the car with my dad. We were going to breakfast. They just radioed him for an emergency. We’re on our way over! Just… please! Turn on the news! It will explain it better than I can. I can’t believe this is—”

  “Calm down. I can barely hear you. What the fuck is goin’—”

  “Just turn on the damn news, Creed!”

  I turned around, grabbing the remote off the nightstand. Clicking on the television and turning it to the first news station I could find.

  My eyes widened at the scene playing out before me.

  “The fuck…” I murmured to myself.

  “We have unconfirmed reports that a plane has crashed into the North Twin Tower moments ago. We are affording more information on the subject as it becomes available,” the broadcaster declared. I flipped a few more channels, all reporting the same thing.

  “You are watching LIVE coverage of the North Twin Tower clearly on fire.”

  “Something devastating has happened. Again, unconfirmed reports that a plane has crashed into the North Twin Tower.”

  “A two-engine jet has crashed into one of the Twin Towers. More information as it become available.”

  “A plane has crashed into the World Trade Center.”

  “What a catastrophic day for New York City. A plane has flown directly into the World Trade Center.”

  “Holy shit,” I breathed out, taking in the live images of the smoke billowing out of the sides of the North Tower of the World Trade Center. Flames licked the side of the building, producing dark gray clouds that blanketed the bright blue morning skies. A gaping hole marred the side of the tower, where a plane crashed, lodging itself into the steel frame. Taking out several floors in its destruction.

  My eyes searched out the time, eleven minutes to nine. An uneasiness I hadn't felt in years washed over me, picturing how many innocent lives were taken. And how many more would perish in the coming hours.

  My goddamn humanity that I turned off came back full force, seeing the horrific scene in front of me.

  Autumn's panicked voice brought me back to reality. “Creed, are you there? Did you see?”

  I shook my head as if she could see me, running out the room. Heading for the stairway. “Where are you?!”

  “We’re heading to the Towers! We’re almost there!” she shouted over the noise.

  “Autumn, you listen to me! You stay on the phone! Do you understand me?! You stay on the fuckin’ phone until I get to you!”

  “Okay,” she whimpered.

  I ran out of the hotel building, searching the streets left and right, taking in the calm before the storm.

  “Chief, are you en route? We need you here, now! It’s anarchy. All shit is breaking lose and we have no correspondence on what the fuck just happened,” I heard a man’s voice yell over the radio, through the phone.

  “I’m on my way. I have my daughter with me, but I’m on my way. My ETA is about five minutes. I’m turning down the road now. Get the crew assembled, I’ll meet you in the front lobby of the North Tower,” her dad, Carl, replied in a steady tone.

  “Autumn! Autumn! Can you hear me?!”

  I took off running down the street in the direction of the East River, toward the Twin Towers. Trying to decide the fastest route to get to her. Busting a left on Liberty Street, I came face to face with mayhem. Flashing lights, sirens echoing off the skyscrapers that were a part of the Manhattan skyline.

  There was so much noise, so many fucking screams coming from every direction. Debris falling from the heavens, like snow. Covering everything in its wake. All I saw was chaos and disorder erupting all around me. Local business alarms sounding from the impact of the explosion. People stampeded the streets and sidewalks, abandoning their fucking cars to run to safety. Trying like hell to get to and from the building as I tried to make my way through. The closer I got the more debris floated through the air, and my visibility started to fog.

&nbs
p; I ran faster, pounding my feet into the pavement, ignoring the burn in my lungs. The stinging at my sides. Making my way through the streets, plowing through everything and everyone that stood in my fucking way. Shoving reporters out of my face, hounding me, asking me if I saw what happened. If I could describe what I had seen to them, what I was feeling, what I thought was happening, but all I could think about was getting to her.

  Getting to fucking, Autumn.

  “Creed! I’m so scared! I’m really scared! Where are you?!” she bellowed through the noise, into the phone on the verge of hysterics.

  “On my way to you! Just stay on the line with me! No matter what, you stay on the fuckin’ line with me!”

  “Chief!” I heard someone shout from a distance on the phone.

  “Autumn, you guys there? Where are you? Tell me exactly where you are?!” I shouted into the phone, running as fast as I fucking could down the street. Pulling my t-shirt up over my mouth and nose, the smog becoming too much. My boots pounded against the pavement with nothing but adrenaline keeping me going.

  “We’re in front of the lobby of the North Tower. I’m in my dad’s car. We’re right out in front!” she yelled back.

  “The plane crashed into the North Tower, Chief,” I heard someone say over the phone again. “Floors ninety through ninety-nine are covered in smoke and engulfed in flames. We can’t get in there, though. The main stairwell has collapsed between those floors. We’re going to try the other emergency exits.”

  “Do we know how many are trapped?”

  “No, Chief! We need to move fast. The fire is out of control. People are starting to hang out the windows up there.”

  “Okay, get me the floor plans for the North Tower now! Suit up, we're going in!” I heard him order.

  “Autumn, what's goin’ on?”

  She didn't answer. All I could hear was her cries. “Dad, don't do this! Why are you putting on a uniform?! Why are you going in there?! You’re the chief! You don’t have to go in there! What are you doing?!” Autumn panicked, screaming to her father.

  I ran fucking faster, dodging police cars, ambulances, and people running in the opposite directions. Shoving them out of the way.

  “Baby girl, I need to go in there. I need to lead my men. This is my job, what I’m trained for. This is what I do. You stay in this car, do you understand me, Autumn! You do not get out of this car!” Carl ordered to his daughter.

  “NO! Don’t go in there! Please! Please! Please don’t go in there! Please!” she pleaded in a desperate tone I could make out clear as day, even with all the madness around me.

  “Creed, you there?”

  “Yes, Sir!” I responded to her father. I hadn’t spoken to him in years, but he still sounded the same. “On my way! Almost there! About five minutes if I can get through.”

  “You make sure she stays in the car. She does not go into that building. You both stay out of that building!”

  “You have my word,” I swore, meaning it with every last fucking fiber in my being.

  “Daddy! Don’t do this to me! You can help! Just stay right here with me! You can still help! Please!”

  “Autumn, I’ll be right back. I promise. Creed is almost here. You do not get out of this car!”

  I heard a door slam shut and then Autumn broke down. Crying uncontrollably, beating her hands on the window. Pleading for him to come back.

  “Babe, almost there! Shhh… I’m almost there! Calm down!”

  “He can’t go in there! It’s bad, Creed! It’s so fucking bad! I don’t want to lose him! He’s my father! Creed, I can’t do this! I can’t just sit here—”

  “Babe, I love you. I fuckin’ love you,” I declared, without a second thought. Trying to distract her before I made it to her.

  She sniffled, “Do you mean that?”

  I missed the hell out of her. Finally understanding the meaning of absence makes the heart grow fonder.

  This last month was fucking brutal without seeing or hearing from her. After that night she’d walked in on me, I kept to myself, focusing on my Vice Prez duties. Turning down every piece of ass thrown my way. Spending every fucking night staring at my ceiling, wondering what she was doing, what she was thinking, and most of all, praying she didn’t really fucking hate me. I did love Autumn, and maybe with time, I could grow to be in love with her, but I would tell her anything she needed to hear in that moment to keep her fucking safe.

  Even if it meant I was lying.

  “I missed you. I missed you so fuckin’ much. Need you in my life. By my side. On the back of my fuckin’ bike, yeah?”

  “Yeah,” she wept like it was all she ever wanted to hear as I dodged more and more people, evacuating the area.

  “Almost there. I can see the buildin’!”

  “Oka—” Suddenly a piercing boom sounded from the building, causing me to pull the phone away from my ear.

  “Autumn!” I shouted back into the receiver, checking my screen to see if there was still a connection. “Babe! Autumn!”

  “Oh my God!” she faintly muttered.

  “You okay? What was that? What’s goin’ on?” The building was right in my sight. And so was the cause of the noise. People fell to their deaths, making the choice to jump. Knowing there was no other way out. I swallowed the bile that rose in my throat and pushed myself harder to get to her.

  I’d seen some fucked-up shit in life but nothing compared to this.

  “Autumn, answer me goddamnit!”

  “I can’t just sit here. I have to go inside. I have to go find my dad!” she rattled. “I can’t just stand back and let him go. People are—”

  “Autumn! Autumn! Do not get out of that fuckin’ car. Stay there! Ya hear me?! Promise me you’ll stay there! Autumn! Autumn! Fuckin’ say somethin’!”

  All I could hear over the screams was heavy breathing and sobs. “I’m sorry, Creed. I have my dad’s radio. In case—” I heard the car door slam shut and more commotion take the place of her sobs over the phone.

  Sirens blasted louder and louder.

  “Autumn, stay in the fuckin’ car!”

  Beep, beep, beep. The line went dead.

  “Fuck!” I yelled out, frustrated that she never fucking listened.

  Not thinking twice about it, I hauled ass over a car, sprinting down the street, needing to get to her. Praying I would find her before she got up the nerve to enter the Tower. Knocking people down, not giving a fuck anymore. Real fucking fear coursed through my veins for the third time in my life, throbbing through my bloodstream. Taking over every last inch of my body. My heart pounded against my chest as I tried to cross the street and make my way over to the building.

  Over to Autumn.

  My vision tunneled, seeing nothing but Luke staring back at me. Flashes of Autumn's face intermixed with his. I tried to shake them away, but they were merciless and unforgiving. I spotted her dad's car confirming my worst nightmare.

  She was gone.

  I darted toward the front of building, dreading that I wouldn’t be able to find her. There were people everywhere covered in ash and blood, stumbling out of the entry where the doors used to be.

  As soon as I got close enough, all I could see were fire trucks and emergency vehicles, all lined up on the streets. Emergency personnel grabbed the injured, running them to safety. If such a place, even existed anymore. There wasn’t an inch of space that wasn’t surrounded by something or someone. I searched the area for any sign of her, jumping up on an abandoned car to my right. Desperately trying to find Autumn in all the goddamn mayhem.

  “Autumn! Autumn!” I screamed as loud as I could when I spotted a girl near the entrance that was Autumn's build. “Autumn! No! Stay there!” I took off running, dodging people left and right, when a strong arm came out of nowhere, stopping me cold.

  “Sir, you can’t go in there!” a firefighter shouted, blocking my way with a few others.

  “Need to find Autumn! I need to get in there! Get the fuck out of my w
ay!” I roared, shoving my way through.

  “Sir, I understand. But you need to let us do our job!”

  “Some fuckin’ job you’re doin’! You let her go in there. Where the fuck were ya a few minutes ago?!” I seethed, grabbing him by his uniform, getting right up in his face. “You let me by, or I will fuck you up! You have no idea who you’re messing with.” I shoved him away from me, getting ready to cock my fist back.

  “Creed?”

  I agitatedly turned around, coming face to face with Carl’s ex-partner. His family and him used to come on vacations with us. Fuck, I hadn’t seen him in years either, but I never thought I’d be so happy to see him again in that moment.

  “Troy! Autumn went in there! She went in the fuckin’ buildin’!”

  He jerked back, stunned. “Shit,” he breathed out.

  “Need to get in there, Troy. Need to find her. She has her dad’s radio—” he abruptly turned, cutting me off. Gesturing for me to follow him.

  I did. Running behind him toward his fire truck. He grabbed his radio, turning the frequency on. Putting his mouth up to the walkie, he pressed the side button, stating, “Come in, Autumn. Are you there? It’s Troy. Can you hear me?”

  The static noise of the radio faded in and out, screams and chaos rang through the receiver. She was inside. I swear I stopped fucking breathing as I waited to hear Autumn's voice or some indication that she was okay.

  She was alive.

  “Troy?” the radio crackled, more screaming. “I’m here. Can you hear me?”

  My heart soared back to life, roughly snatching the radio out of his hand, visibly taking a deep breath. Stressing out, “Babe, where are ya?”

  “Creed… Creed… is that you? People are on fire! Oh my God, Creed! I can’t find my dad!”

  More crackling.

  More loud booms.

  More chaos and cries.

  “Where. Are. You?” I demanded on the verge of fucking losing it. Hanging on by a goddamn thread.

  Nothing but static radiated from my hand. I peered all around me looking for an opening to bust through, taking matters into my own hands and getting her the fuck out of there. Taking down anyone who fucking stood in my way. Praying to God that this would soon be over, ready to get on my hands and knees and beg for mercy for Autumn’s safety. For Carl’s. Pleading for his forgiveness for all my sins. A loud noise caused me to look up at the sky.