His words touched me. “I like you, Mentor.”
“I like you as well. Have you any more questions?”
“I want to think about what you've said. I will get the group together. Is one date preferable to another?”
“The sooner the better.”
“OK.”
“Go now in light and love.”
“Thanks. Goodbye.”
It took me several minutes before I was ready to open my eyes. My body processes had slowed amazingly. Even though I had been talking, I was hardly breathing. As I stretched, I reached over and turned off the tape recorder. I was anxious to rewind the tape and listen to Mentor again. Each of his statements had been precious to me, and not because they had come out of my own mouth.
I heard a knock at the front door. Standing, I briefly had to steady myself against a wooden cabinet. But as I strode toward the door, I felt myself leave my experience behind. Indeed, I felt very fresh and alert. Mentor seemed to have a good effect on my energy level.
Gale was at the door. She had on a short white summer dress, a yellow ribbon in her hair. She wore a little lipstick but no other makeup—she needed nothing. The light in her eyes danced mischievously.
“What have you been up to?” she asked. “I knocked twice ten minutes ago.”
“I didn't hear you.” I opened the door farther. “Come in, my parents aren't home.”
Her eyes widened as she stepped inside and pinched my belly.
“Does that mean you want to have sex real quick before they come home?” she teased.
I gave her a quick hug. “I don't just have sex on my mind. I appreciate you as a human being as well as an instrument of pure pleasure.”
“Wow! I like that description, it suits me.” Her eyes were searching. “Show me your house, I want to see how the other half lives.”
I showed it to her. It took all of five minutes. We ended up in my room, kissing on the bed. I don't know who started taking off whose clothes first, but soon we were both naked. To see all of Gale's body in the daylight was a spiritual experience. But she didn't let me stare at her too long as she pulled me under the covers and kissed me in a way I assumed only Gale could kiss. Of course, I had never made out with another girl in my life. Yet somehow I managed to stop the plunge into ecstasy long enough to ask what I thought was a pertinent question.
“I meant to ask this last night. Are we using any form of birth control here?”
She was amused. “You think I want your baby? You think I love you that much?”
“Well.”
She poked me. “I take the pill. I took one this morning. Are you happy?”
“No.” I pulled her close. “But I think I will be in a minute or two.”
Later, after we made love for the second time, I dozed. Really, I thought I was only asleep for a minute, but when I opened my eyes Gale was gone. For a moment I had a terrible image that I had slept for an hour, and that my parents had come home and peeked in my room while we were lying naked together. I wondered if Gale was in the living room explaining to my parents that we planned to get married as soon as the preacher arrived. Sitting up, I pulled on my pants and hurried down the hall.
Gale was in the living room sitting in my father's chair.
She had a bed sheet wrapped around her, nothing else.
She was listening to Mentor's tape. Maybe not for the first time.
She turned it off when she saw me.
For what seemed the longest time, we stared at each other.
“I can explain,” I said finally.
She shook her head. Her expression was serious.
“You don't have to,” she said quietly.
“I was just goofing off.”
“No.”
I forced a laugh. “Sure I was. It's something I do when I'm trying to get ideas for a story. I talk to myself and tape the conversation.”
“No.”
I fidgeted. “I'm not crazy, you know I'm not crazy.”
She set the tape player aside and held out her arms.
“Come here,” she said.
I did as she requested. I sat beside her in the big comfortable chair, and she hugged me and buried her face in my side. For a long time we sat like that.
“You're not crazy,” she said finally.
“Yeah. I was just fooling around.”
“No. Mentor is real. I know he's real.”
I drew back. “What are you talking about?”
She stared at me with an expression that I could only describe as profound. Yet there is pain as well as joy in great depth of feeling, and it seemed to me right then that Gale shook with revelations she wasn't sure she wanted to share. Yet there was a calmness surrounding her as well, as if our very discussion were inevitable.
“I have sensed something similar to what you just experienced for over a year now,” she said. “I wanted to talk to you about it last night.”
“Why didn't you?” I asked.
She brushed the hair from her eyes.
“You were too anxious to get my clothes off,” she said. But then she withdrew her hand and lowered her head. “I thought I was crazy.”
“Has Mentor talked to you as well?”
“No. Not so clearly. But for some time now I have known I was a visitor to this world. That I had come here for a purpose. And that you were somehow connected to that purpose.”
“l can't believe it,” I whispered.
A faint smile. “You can't believe, Mr. Spaceman?”
I felt overwhelmed by how fast everything was moving. By the direction I was moving in. I hugged her tighter; it felt good to touch her skin.
“I don't know what to do,” I muttered.
Her head pressed against mine. “Do what you've been told to do.”
“But what if he's wrong?”
“Then do what your heart tells you to do.”
“I don't know what it tells me. Except to keep loving you.”
“Oh, Daniel.” She kissed my head. “You are my Spaceman.”
CHAPTER TEN
TO MY IMMENSE SURFRISE, I HAD NO trouble convincing the others that we needed to go away together for a few days. It seemed that all of them, including Shena, had been thinking the same thing. I wondered how much Mentor had been working on each of us. I was especially pleased that Shena was receptive. Her breakdown at Disneyland seemed a forgotten nightmare. It was Shena, in fact, who located our retreat cabin, a three-bedroom exposed post and beam affair on a back road off the main highway to Lake Arrowhead. The place bordered another smaller lake, and Shena said the real estate agent had emphasized its isolation and serenity. I was impressed with how fast Shena had found the cabin. We chipped in to pay for it, but I believe Shena paid more than her share. She was clearly anxious to be with Jimmy for a spell. I hoped they could out their differences.
As we turned off the main mountain road and cruised down into the heavily wooded valley and saw Crystal Lake for the first time, I felt a calm steal over me. The place was familiar, I felt as if I had dreamed of it for years. The smooth mirror-like lake water called to me. If I stared into it at night, I wondered, would I see the mysteries of the starry sky? I had spoken only once to Mentor since he had given me my orders. I had brought the few supplies he had said would be necessary to awaken our Star Group. Actually he spoke of them as symbols of a deeper reality, not intrinsically important, but useful as tools to help our minds expand.
The whole valley appeared deserted. I was puzzled since it was Friday and the weekend was coming. Shena explained; she seemed to know a lot about the area.
“This is mainly a skiing valley,” she said. “During the summer everyone locks up their houses. The lake is not large enough for waterskiing or powerboats.”
“But it looks like you can fish on it,” Sal said, admiring the lake. He enjoyed fishing. Sometimes he brought his rod out on his surfboard, along with his cigarettes. He had once caught a two-hundred-pound tuna from Huntington Beach pier and s
wore he had eaten the whole thing in a week's time.
“The fishing is supposed to be good,” Shena said.
Sal was driving us into the valley in his van. “I would like to get a rowboat and go out on it,” he said. “What do you say, Jimmy?”
“I would just as soon swim in it naked with my girlfriend.”
Shena hesitated, then smiled. “I'm game.”
“I'd just as soon swim in it naked with all the guys,” Gale said.
“Hey,” I complained.
“I'm not taking my clothes off in front of you guys,” Teri said.
“You may as well,” Sal said. “I've shown Jimmy and Daniel those nude photos I took of you.”
“I had six of them blown up and plastered on my bedroom walls,” Jimmy said.
Teri chuckled. “Fortunately I never strip in a room where there is a camera. For that reason I know your photos are probably of Gale.”
“Hey,” I said.
“Maybe they are,” Jimmy muttered, casting Gale a quick look. Sal glanced at her as well, and I couldn't help noticing the disturbing dynamics. But Gale kept her gaze straight ahead and focused on the lake. I would have given a pretty penny to know what she was thinking right then. What night she was remembering.
When we reached the cabin, five-sixths of the gang set about unloading and exploring. They all wanted to get the best room. But I never cared where I slept, and wanted to get out and stretch my legs. I set off by myself around the lake, still marveling at its serenity. It was the kind of lake where a stone could skip a dozen times and I picked up a pebble and got it to jump more than six times on my first try. The body of water was a quarter mile long, half that wide, an almost perfect oval.
The smell of the surrounding pines penetrated deep into my lungs and cleared out years of accumulated smog. The simple act of breathing was invigorating. I had to ask myself why I didn't go up to the mountains more often. The city was thick third density. When the sun went down that night I knew I would feel closer to the heavens than ever. Stars no longer spooked me. They were like old friends since Mentor had appeared.
Ten minutes into my walk I came across an old man who looked like Santa Claus after a macrobiotic diet. He stood tall and erect, with a white beard that reached almost to his belt. Although it was warm, he wore a thick red Pendleton shirt and what appeared to be heavy wool pants. He looked healthy enough, but instinctively I felt that if I had met him a year earlier he would have been much more vital. His eyes were clear, but tired looking. The lines that fanned out from them had been eroded into furrows by hard times. Father Time was catching up with him, and when he nodded to me and opened his mouth to say hi I noticed he was missing a few teeth. Still, I felt drawn to him as I watched him standing on the shore with a fishing pole in hand.
“Catch anything interesting?” I asked as I came near.
He shook his head. “Naah. Just a few miserable bass. I threw them back.”
“How big do they have to be for you to keep them?”
“At least a foot. You don't want to bite into the young'ns. All you get are bones stuck in your teeth for your trouble.”
“Don't you take the bones out before you cook them?”
He spat near the lake. “Nope. Don't cook them much, either.”
“You're a sushi lover. I should have known by looking at you.”
He appreciated my comment; he wasn't a bad guy. He nodded across the lake toward our cabin. “I saw you drive in. How long you planning to stay?”
“Just till Monday.” I sighed as I glanced around. “But it’s so peaceful here, I wish we could stay a week.”
He nodded at the water. “It wasn't so peaceful here last January.”
“Why? What happened then?”
“The Donner family always came up here during the winter. They loved to ski and hike. They owned the cabin you're renting – they might still own it for all I know. Anyway, they were here last winter from Christmas to the middle of January. As you might imagine, this lake is pretty darn solid by then. David Donner – he was their young boy – loved to go ice skating every afternoon. But I warned him and his dad to stay away from the lake because we'd had several warm days in a row, with the sun shining hard on the ice. It looked none too strong to me – I wouldn't walk out on it.”
“What happened?” I asked.
The old man began to reel in a fish.
“It was January tenth, twelve-thirty in the afternoon, when David was out on the lake skating and the ice broke beneath him. I saw him fall in from my place over yonder. I had been watching him closely because I was worried when neither him nor his dad heeded my warning. But Mr. Donner was a brave man, and when his son crashed through the ice and disappeared he ran out on to the lake to rescue him. I ran out of my cabin and got to Mrs. Donner in time to stop her.” He shook his old head. “I'm glad I was able to save her at least.”
“Did they both die?”
“Darn shootin' they did. They both went into the frigid water, and once the ice started to break all around them there was no way anyone could get to them. We could see them both thrashing in the cold, it was a terrible sight. Mrs. Donner couldn't stop crying. I wrenched my back trying to hold her on shore. We weren't alone; there were others around that afternoon. But not one of us could rescue them and they were only a hundred feet out at most.” He nodded to the lake. “We never did find their bodies.”
“Even after the ice thawed?”
“Nope. The lake was dragged and them steel hooks grabbed nothing but mud and empty beer cans. They’re both still down there somewhere. I just hope one day I don't catch one of their eyeballs with my hook and reel it in. That would make me sick to my stomach, it would. But I suppose the fish have already made many a meal of their soft parts.”
I was horrified. “I hope they died quickly.”
“It wasn't that quick.” The old man nodded to my friends across the lake. They were still walking back and forth between the van and the cabin. “But don't let what happened then spoil your vacation. You'll have fun.”
“I hope so.” I was beginning to wonder.
“You had fun last time, didn't you?”
“I’ve never been here before.”
The old man squinted. “Oh, I never saw you before, that's right.”
I felt a drop of ice water on the back of my skull. There are all kinds of deaths. Some quick, some very slow.
“Have you seen my other friends before?”
He nodded. “I've seen that van, that's for sure. And that tall black fellow.”
Sal hadn't told me about this place.
Right then, all my friends were outside by the van.
“Do you recognize any of the others?” I asked.
The old man squinted in their direction. “I can't be sure. But that blonde girl there sure looks familiar.”
Gale was the only one who could be described as blonde.
“The one with the white pants?” I asked softly.
“Yeah. I think I know her.”
My throat was dry. “When were they here?”
“Last winter. No, maybe it was last summer, I can't remember.”
My voice sounded pitiful to my own ears.
“But you're sure you saw them here together?”
The old man stared at me. He was no fool, he knew what I was asking.
“Son,” he said as he reeled in a miserable three-inch bass, “when you get to be my age it's hard to be sure about anything. But I might have a long talk with my girlfriend it I was you. Or you might not want to talk to her at all. It all depends on what you want to do while you're up here.”
I underscored the choices. The peace of the place was a lie.
Also, it held on to its victims. Not a good omen.
This weekend I could cook or drown.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
THAT NIGHT, WHILE WE SAT ON THE PORCH and looked out at the lake and the emerging stars, I brought up Mentor. We had eaten an early dinner, so none of our
bellies was stuffed. I thought that was important if Mentor was going to do some kind of meditation with us.
The day had been pleasant, despite my uneasy feelings about Gale's past. We had swum in the lake, fished from it, and also rowed on top of it. On a hike later in the day we found a couple of neat caves far back in the woods. One cave, in particular, seemed to dig deep into the mountain. But we had not explored it as far as we might have. I think we were afraid of running into a bear. Sal had a revolver with him, which seemed to comfort the others but bothered me. I had never been a fan of guns. Sal was given the revolver by his real father, he said, ten years ago. It was a .357 magnum, and Sal said it could stop a big bear if he hit the beast in a vital spot.
I eased into the subject of Mentor by bringing up aliens.
I pointed out the Big Dipper, which was not so clear as it would have been if the moon was absent. Briefly I wondered if the full moon would aid the awakening Mentor hoped to achieve. It seemed a remarkable coincidence to me that it was so bright.
“Astronomers say there are over six hundred million galaxies in the bowl of the Big Dipper alone,” I said. “Those are just the ones we know about. If you think about it, that each of those six hundred million galaxies has as many stars as our own-and the Milky Way has four hundred billion stars in it – then it makes you realize how small we are.”
Sal was enjoying an evening cigarette because none of us would let him smoke in the cabin. He sat close to the edge of the pier, in the moonlight, away from Teri and the rest of us. By the feeble light of a flickering lantern, Teri was sewing a blouse. Jimmy and Shena lounged together on a hammock, and Gale sat at my knee, waiting for me to spill my guts.
“I like to reflect on how large the universe is,” Sal said. “It makes me realize how insignificant my problems are.”
“I've always wanted to look through a telescope,” Teri said. “Daniel, you're a nerd, why don't you have one?”
I smiled. “My answer for everything. No money.”
“I feel differently about astronomy,” Jimmy said. “As well as the space program. Neither does anything to help our society.”