‘Doc, will you tell me more about Nate’s life on Callisto?’ I asked eagerly.
‘No. No way,’ Doctor Liana replied at once. ‘Doctor-patient confidentiality.’
‘I’m not asking for medical secrets, just more of an insight into his life there.’
‘You’ll need to get that from your husband, not me,’ said the doc, repeating her previous mantra. ‘Doctor-patient confidentiality.’
‘Worth a try,’ I sighed. ‘Have you got any advice for me, then?’
The doc gave me a speculative look. ‘I will say this. Sometimes Nathan can get a bit lost inside his own head and it takes a while for him to find a way through his thoughts. My advice? Just be patient with him.’
That I could do. ‘Don’t worry, Doc. I’ll be Nathan’s safety net. I won’t let him fall.’
The doctor smiled. ‘Tell him that, not me.’
46
I decided to hit the gym before my shift started. I needed to work off my early morning frustrations. As I headed there, it didn’t take long to realize that the news of my union with Vee had spread throughout the ship. Most people I passed offered me their sincere congratulations. One or two greeted me with a smirk or a knowing look. Well, let them stare if they had nothing better to do. I wasn’t the first one of us settlers to get married and I very much doubted I’d be the last.
Going to the gym, however, turned out to be a mistake. I wasn’t the only one who’d decided to work out before the start of the next shift. The moment I entered the gym, the ribald comments started.
‘Way to advance your career on board, Linedecker,’ Harrison called out.
Arsehat! I ignored him.
All eyes were on me as I made my way over to the first piece of apparatus I wanted to use – the programmable pummel bag.
‘Thinks he’s too good to associate with us common drones now that he’s joined with the captain of the ship,’ said Maria.
Laughter followed Maria’s comment, then more remarks were made, a number of them snide. The others were using various pieces of equipment around the gym but that didn’t stop the commentary.
‘I wouldn’t have thought you two had much – if anything – in common,’ said Ian. ‘I mean, she’s an educated elite and you’re just a drone. What d’you two find to talk about when you’re alone? Or have you not reached the talking stage yet?’
I glared at Ian, practically fusing my lips together so I wouldn’t bite his inquisitive head off.
‘What happens when she heads back to Earth?’ Ian continued. ‘You gonna stay behind on Mendela Prime and wait for her?’
‘Are you kidding?’ scoffed Maria. ‘Bet the moment the captain sets foot on Earth and is amongst her elite friends and family, Nathan will be instantly forgotten.’
Stay calm, Nathan. Don’t let them get to you.
‘Nathan, you’d better make the most of her whilst you’ve got her,’ Harrison called out. ‘I’m still trying to figure out how on Callisto you managed to persuade her to join with you in the first place.’
‘He hypnotised her?’ Maria suggested.
‘Dicknotised her more like!’ Harrison laughed. ‘Picked up a few tips and tricks from me over the years, Nathan? You were wise to learn from the sensei.’ Harrison took a bow.
I punched the pummel bag harder.
‘What’s she like in the sack? Bet she’s learnt a few tricks of her own from all those films she watches.’ Corbyn winked.
‘I wouldn’t mind a go or two with her myself,’ said Harrison. ‘Have you seen that gravity-defying rack?’
‘Nat, any chance of you sharing?’ asked Corbyn.
I spun around. ‘The next arsehole who opens their mouth in my direction is gonna end up in the medical bay.’
One glance at my stony expression and they all found something else to do, which was fine with me. Ian walked over to me and said quietly, ‘Sorry, son.’ Then he headed back to his apparatus. His apology did nothing to cool my mood. It was just as well I was in the gym and could take out my temper on the pummel bag. I beat the stuffing out of it – literally. My last kick brought it down from the ceiling. Sweat dripping off me, I turned to find four pairs of eyes watching me. They all turned and carried on with their various training programmes the moment I looked their way. Placing the destroyed pummel bag in one corner of the gym, I made my way out of there and back to my quarters.
It was my own fault. I was the one who’d let the cat out of the bag about me and Vee. I should’ve kept my mouth shut, but any more comments like those I’d just heard and someone would be in a world of pain.
47
When Nathan walked onto the bridge, I instantly knew that something was wrong. He had a face like stormy weather. He sat down at his workstation at the navigation panel without even a smile at me. For a brief moment I thought he was mad at me for not staying in bed with him earlier but I dismissed that notion straight away. Nathan wasn’t that petulant. So what had happened to wind him up?
After a quick glance around the bridge to make sure no one was paying attention, I walked over to Nathan.
‘May I have a private word with you?’ I asked quietly.
Nathan glared up at me from his chair, then stood up. I led the way out of the bridge and into the corridor.
‘Are you OK?’ I asked the moment the doors had closed behind us.
‘Yes, of course,’ said Nathan, his tone clipped. ‘Now if you don’t mind, I have work to do. Captain.’
Whoa!
‘Why did you say it like that?’
‘How else should I say it? Captain?’
I stared at Nathan, cringing inwardly from the venom he managed to inject into that one word. Was I mistaken? Was he mad at me for not making love with him earlier?
‘Talk to me, Nate,’ I said. ‘What’s wrong?’
‘There’s not a damned thing wrong. I’ve just been reminded that you’re an Elite and I’m not, that’s all. Captain.’
Dahell!
‘That’s enough, Nathan,’ I said, my temper flaring. ‘I don’t know which idiot you’ve been speaking to or what they said to put you in such a foul mood, but sort yourself out. And that’s your captain talking.’
Bugger this for a game of soldiers! If he didn’t know by now that I couldn’t give a rat’s behind about his drone status then he never would. I went to stalk past Nathan and head back to the bridge but his hand shot out and caught me by my upper arm before I’d gone more than a couple of steps. I swung round to glare at him.
‘I’m sorry, Vee,’ Nathan said quietly. ‘I was being a dick.’
‘Yes, you bloody well were,’ I said furiously.
‘Forgive me?’ Nate quirked an eyebrow, a self-deprecating half-smile on his lips.
It took a moment or two for me to calm down sufficiently to return his smile, albeit grudgingly. ‘You’re forgiven.’
Nathan gave me a quick kiss before stating, ‘Then I shall go back to work and be a dick no more. Captain.’
He gave me a grin before heading back onto the bridge, leaving me shaking my head behind him.
48
When I entered our quarters after my shift, the first thing that hit me was the mess. Vee’s jacket, trousers and boots decorated the floor as did a couple of her many colourful sleeveless shirts. I pulled off my clothes and hung them up ready to wear the following day. Wearing just my shorts, I made for the bed and sat on top of the cover, picking up my tablet from the side table.
Vee emerged from the bathroom wearing an orange sleeveless shirt and shorts, nothing else. My breath hitched in my throat.
‘Oh, nihao, Nate, I didn’t hear you come in.’ Vee’s face lit up, her smile warm and immediate.
‘Vee, I adore you but you are a slob!’
Surprised, Vee looked around our room. ‘Oh dear! Sorry. I did plan to sort out this mess before you got here,’ she admitted. ‘I’ll fix it.’
I watched her move around the room. My tablet was still in my hands so maybe she thought
I was reading but nothing could be further from the truth. She had all my attention. Vee was oblivious to the way I was watching her, which was probably just as well. She bent to pick up her jacket off the floor and my body sprang to life. Vee hung the jacket over the back of the chair by the desk then moved to pick up the rest of her clothes off the floor.
‘Vee, I need you.’
‘You need me to do what?’ Vee wasn’t looking at me as she placed her boots and trousers in a storage cupboard.
A trace of a smile hovered over my lips but it didn’t last long. Unwelcome, unbidden memories of my time on Callisto had begun to whisper in my mind. Some days I could suppress the whispers. Some days I couldn’t. ‘Vee, I need you.’
Puzzled, she turned to me. I put down my tablet. The look in my eyes wasn’t the only thing which clarified what I meant.
‘Oh,’ Vee breathed. ‘I see.’
She smiled, tilting her head in a move that reminded me of her brother, not that I wanted to think of him at all in that moment.
She slinked towards me still wearing that smile of hers that made my heart beat faster. When she reached me, she pushed me back against the bed and climbed on top of me. My heart started thumping, but not in a good way. As she bent to kiss me, I flipped her onto her back, my body immediately covering hers, my mouth pressed against hers. We kissed until we both had to break apart to gasp for breath.
‘Wow! What brought that on?’ asked Vee.
‘That top you’re wearing. It does it to me every time.’
‘Then I’ll never take it off,’ said Vee.
‘Wanna bet,’ I replied.
Vee tried to sit up but I wouldn’t let her. She placed her hands against my chest and pushed, trying to get me to lie back down, but I wouldn’t.
‘Can’t I be on top for a change?’ Vee laughed.
I froze. Inside I began to shut down. Slowly, I shook my head.
Vee’s smile disappeared. ‘Oh, Nathan, I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.’ She looked up at me, stricken, as if she was the one who’d done something wrong.
‘Vee, it’s not you. It’s just . . .’
Vee placed a finger over my lips. ‘Nate, I understand. Really I do. And don’t you dare apologize.’
I sat up, my head in my hands as I sat still, trying not to give in to the destructive storm swirling inside me. My head was messed up. I had to get out of here. I couldn’t let Vee see me like this.
‘I need to leave,’ I muttered.
Where the hell did I put my trousers? I started to stand up but Vee curled her arms around me from behind. She kissed my shoulder, then the back of my neck before resting her forehead against my head.
‘Nathan, thank you,’ Vee whispered.
Her words made me wince. I swung around to face her, stunned. ‘What’re you thanking me for?’
‘For trusting me with your memories. For letting me share some of your past,’ said Vee.
‘For showing you how broken I am?’ I said bitterly.
Vee moved round to cup my face with her hands, looking into my eyes. Her lips brushed against my own. ‘When you’re feeling broken, I will hold you in my arms, all the pieces of you until you’re whole again,’ she said softly.
‘You reckon you can fix me?’
‘I can be there for you whilst you try to heal,’ Vee amended. ‘I’m here, Nate. And I’m not going anywhere.’
I buried my face in her neck and she held me tight until I stopped shaking.
Vee lay on her side, her head on my shoulder, her left leg over mine, her left hand stroking gently over my chest. For my part, my arm beneath her shoulders pulled her closer, stroking slowly up and down her arm. Her skin was so smooth, so soft. Just one of the many reasons I couldn’t stop touching her. These were usually the moments I loved the most, when Vee and I lay in an easy silence where not a word needed to be spoken. But I was troubled. We were close to leaving Mazon territory for good. And once we made it to our destination, what then? Ian’s comments, made to me in the gym, had been playing on my mind for a while now – one comment in particular.
‘Vee, what happens when we get to Mendela Prime?’
Vee raised her head to look at me. ‘What d’you mean?’
‘Going back to Earth isn’t an option for me. Escaping from Callisto made me a fugitive. I can’t risk being recaptured by the Authority. I won’t go back to Callisto. I’d rather die.’
Vee and I regarded each other as long moments passed. ‘I understand,’ Vee said at last. ‘It’s just that Doctor Liana wants to go back to Earth.’
That didn’t surprise me. Doctor Sheen had hated Callisto almost as much as I had. She’d kept herself apart from most of us drones on that moon, doing her job, no more, no less. If, unlike most of us, she had friends and family back on Earth who hadn’t turned their backs on her, why wouldn’t she want to return to her old life?
‘Nate, I feel obligated to take her there,’ Vee said unhappily. ‘Her and anyone else who wants to go back. I said I would.’
‘I know.’
She sighed. ‘But it’s taken my whole life to find you,’ said Vee. ‘I can’t imagine being without you now – not even for a single day.’
‘So what do we do?’ I asked.
‘Maybe we could travel back together until we reach the outer rim of Earth’s star system?’ Vee suggested. ‘I could take Doctor Liana and any others who decide to go back to one of Earth’s space stations before turning round to pick you up, after which we could head back to Mendela Prime?’
I sighed. ‘Even the outer rim of Earth’s solar system would be a dangerous place for me. Outer rim spaceports are filled with bandits and bounty hunters who’d trade their own mothers to the Authority for a few extra credits. And besides, d’you really think you can just stroll into Earth’s system and the Authority would allow you to stroll out again?
‘No, they wouldn’t,’ Vee agreed at last. ‘I guess I have trouble thinking straight where you’re concerned.’ She lowered her head to rest it against my shoulder again. ‘So what do we do?’
Neither of us had the answer.
49
I sat on Aidan’s bed waiting for him to speak. He was the one who’d asked me to come and see him, but he sat on his chair staring at me like I was something peculiar that had just started sprouting out of his floor.
‘Today, Aidan!’ I prompted. ‘I do have other things to do besides sit here and watch you gawp at me.’
‘Vee, how much do you trust Anjuli?’
‘Huh? What d’you mean?’
Aidan shrugged. ‘How much do you trust her? I mean, do you think what she says is . . . reliable?’
‘I don’t know. I was sorry to lose her from the bridge, I know that,’ I replied. ‘She was keen and a fast learner, just not very good at thinking things through.’
‘I’m not talking about her competency,’ said Aidan. ‘I’m asking if you think she’s trustworthy.’
‘I suppose so. I don’t really know her well though.’
‘Not the way you know Nathan,’ said Aidan coldly.
I sighed. Well, that didn’t take long. ‘If the sole point of this conversation is to wind me up, then you’ve failed. I’m outta here.’ I stood up. If Aidan had asked me to come to his quarters merely to have a go at me in private, then good luck to him, I had better things to do.
‘No, don’t leave.’ Aidan grabbed my arm. ‘I’m sorry, OK. It’s just that Erica’s told me some things . . .’
‘Erica? What kind of things?’ I frowned.
Aidan gave me a studied look. ‘You know what? Forget I said anything. And besides, I promised Erica I wouldn’t tell anyone what she told me. It’s just that you’re my sister and it’s my job to look out for you.’
I could see Aidan was conflicted but now I was intrigued.
‘Did Erica say something negative about me?’
Aidan frowned. ‘Of course not. D’you think I’d let her badmouth you to my face?’
‘So she
was badmouthing somebody then?’
‘Vee, let it drop. I really shouldn’t have said anything. Besides, what you and Nathan get up to is none of my business. It’s just . . . I don’t want to see you get hurt.’
‘Why would I get hurt? And what’s Nathan got to do with it? I thought we were talking about Erica – and Anjuli.’
My brother shook his head, his gaze falling away from mine.
‘Aidan! What did Erica say?’ I said, exasperated.
‘Look, I’m sure it’s all over now.’
‘What’s all over now?’
‘Nathan and Anjuli.’
Stunned, I stared at Aidan. ‘What?’
Aidan shrugged. ‘Like I said, forget I said anything.’
‘Something’s going on between Nathan and Anjuli? That’s bollocks. They’re just friends.’
‘If you say so,’ said Aidan.
Once more with feeling. ‘That’s not worthy of you, Aidan, to take any old piece of absurd gossip and treat it as fact,’ I said, unimpressed.
‘I know you’ve been too busy to notice but Erica and I have been together a lot,’ said Aidan. ‘She’s been useful in helping me get to know the refugees. And after what she’s told me about Nathan I don’t trust him, that’s all.’
‘I’m not going to stay here and listen to you slam the guy I . . . I’m with,’ I said icily. ‘And if Nathan is so terrible, why didn’t you say something before?’
‘Did I know you were going to sneak off and join with him?’ Aidan’s sudden burst of anger caught me by surprise. ‘I’m your brother and you didn’t even tell me what you were planning. After everything we’ve been through over the last three years, you didn’t even think to let me know, never mind include me in your plans.’
‘I didn’t sneak off. And I told you, it was a spur of the moment thing.’
Damn! Aidan was actually hurt. I really didn’t think he’d be that bothered.
‘I’m your brother,’ said Aidan.
We regarded each other.
‘You’re right. I’m sorry,’ I said at last. ‘If I ever go through another joining ceremony, I’ll make sure you’re there.’