“He talked to you?” That was a big deal. “What would he say?” I asked Nas gently.
She let out a long, shuddering breath. “That he was afraid of the dark. So I snuck into his room one night and slept beside him, holding him. He shook so bad, Mina. I thought he was having a fit. Finally, he fell asleep and the shaking stopped. I fell asleep too.”
Oh, God. My stomach turned again. I knew what was coming.
Nas turned to face me, her eyes shining. “One second, I’m asleep. The next, the covers are being ripped away and she’s dragging me out of bed by my ankle.” She lifted her hand and touched a spot at the back of her head. “My head hit the ground hard. It all happened so fast that I couldn’t think…couldn’t scream. All I could do was lift my hands and hold them out as she beat the shit out of me with her bare fists.”
A tear fell down her cheek and she swiped it away. “I just remember being so scared, and for the first time in my life, I believed in monsters living under your bed.” She sniffed prettily. “The monster was my mother, of course, and she only stopped when she heard me crying. Lev didn’t cry, ever. When Lev switched on the light, my mother looked down at me, shock on her face. She turned to Lev, pointed a finger, and screeched at him that he did this.”
My eyes closing, I doubled over, my face paling. “Jesus, Nas.”
“Yeah.” she nodded gently. “I hadn’t perfected the fetal position that Lev had, so I took more damage than I he ever did. Sasha must have heard me crying, because he walked into Lev’s room and saw her standing over me. I was shaking and crying. I was five years old. Sasha walked back into his room, calm as ever, and he came back a few seconds later, pointing a loaded 9mm at our mother’s head. He was twelve.
“His lip curled and he said, ‘Touch ‘em again and I’ll blow your fucking brains out, bitch’.” Nas laughed humorlessly. “Sasha never did beat around the bush. He called for my father, went over to Lev, and stood in front of him. He motioned to me and I ran to him. He held me tight while I cried. And Lev…he did nothing, because he couldn’t function.” She burst into tears, covering her face, her voice breaking. “And I finally understood why my brother was the way he was.”
I stood so quickly that my chair screeched. I wrapped my arms around her and she accepted what I was offering. Her slim arms came around me and she spoke quietly. “My father removed Lev’s shirt and looked him over. He was bruised all over.” Her breath stuttered. “Lev spoke again, and his first words to my father in an entire year were ‘I’m sorry’. Father cleaned me up, hugged me tight, and then put Sasha and me back to bed. Lev slept by Father’s side, and we never saw our mother again.”
God, she was hurting. “I’m so sorry, Nas. I’m so sorry.”
She pulled back and looked down at me, dejected and teary-eyed. “No. I had one night of it. Lev probably endured years of it. I’m sorry it didn’t happen sooner.”
Sadness enveloped me. “Why did she hate him so much?”
Nas explained, “He was inferior, in her opinion. She couldn’t believe that she, a high-class woman, could produce something so flawed. She hated that he wasn’t normal. Went so far as to get a DNA test to prove he wasn’t hers, that they’d made a switch at the hospital. When the results came back that he was indeed hers, she hated him even more. He was the worst thing that happened to her.” Nas frowned. “But she didn’t even know him. She didn’t want to know him. He was so sweet and kind. And she broke him.”
No. No, that wasn’t right.
“He’s not broken, Nas,” I told her. “He’s in there. I see him. He’s just…stuck.”
“Yeah,” she agreed then sighed long and slow. “Don’t give up on him, Mina. He doesn’t trust easily, but once you’re in with him…you’re in. Put in the effort and you’ll be rewarded.” She added, “Just talk to him and be patient if he makes you do all the talking. He might not respond a whole lot, but he’s listening to every word. He’ll speak if he thinks something is worth saying.”
I left soon after, walking home and waiting for Lev.
I didn’t understand all of him, but what I knew of him, I understood a lot better.
A piece of my heart I had hidden long ago opened right then.
Lev was a clink in my armor, a crack in my wall, and I just knew that if he really tried, I would open myself to him completely in the hopes that he would do the same.
I would do that for him.
I would do that, because he was worthy.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Mina
The sound of one-sided chatter aired as soon as the front door opened. I listened in from the kitchen as I went about my business, making toast and pouring myself a glass of orange juice.
“Lev, all I’m saying is that she probably feels awkward here,” stated the familiar melodic voice.
I stilled mid-pour and my stomach boiled with liquid hot lava rage.
She was stooping to an all-time low. If Anika had an issue with me, she should have the balls to tell me to my face, not go behind my back and try to remove me from the picture.
Lev sighed. “This is none of your business, Ani.” He sounded tired.
“Okay,” she muttered in defeat. “Don’t say I told you so when she leaves though.”
Lev walked into the kitchen, and as soon as his eyes landed on me, the lines on his forehead softened. That was enough for me. My jealousy over his morning outing left me in a rush.
“Morning, sweetie,” I said through a smile as I made my way over to him. I wrapped an arm around his middle and gave him a squeeze. He returned my embrace, leaning down to kiss my hair.
“Good morning, Mina.”
We separated, and Anika stepped into the kitchen wearing an easy but false smile. “Morning, Mina.” She looked me up and down. “You look…comfortable.”
I glanced down at myself.
Confusion went through me. What offended her? My black tank, or my overly long grey sweats? Perhaps it was the fact I wasn’t wearing a bra under said tank.
When I looked back up at her and found her glaring at the small indents my nipples were making in the material, I almost smiled. I wanted to tell her it was okay, because Lev had already seen them in real life. But I didn’t. Instead, I shrugged. “Sure, I guess so.” I smiled, teeth gleaming. “So, how was breakfast?”
Anika frowned. “How did you know we were at breakfast? We didn’t know we’d be out for breakfast.”
I bit into my toast, fighting the urge to throw my juice in her face. I chewed slowly then shrugged. “Vik told me.”
Anika straightened, her face paling slightly. “When did you see Vik?”
Lev poured himself a glass of orange juice. His brow furrowed. “Yes, when did you see Viktor?”
Oh my.
Is that jealousy I smell, Lev Leokov?
It certainly seemed so. I decided to experiment with that. I lowered my lashes. “This morning. We did coffee.” I smiled secretly, biting the inside of my lip. “It was…nice.”
“Does Nas know?” Anika glowered.
Yes, I wanted to yell. Because I would never do that to my friend, you turd!
Rather, I nodded slowly. “Sure does.” I turned to Lev, nibbling on my toast. “On another note…Lev, how would I ask a guy out?”
He swallowed at the wrong time, choking on his orange juice. Coughing, his face turned red and he spluttered in disbelief, “You want to date?”
My head tilted in thought. “I do. I really do. But how would I get his attention?”
My intention was to make Lev jealous, but what he said next had Anika shrinking into herself.
He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Mina, if the man hasn’t noticed you yet, he’s not worthy of you.”
Light rose up, warming me from the inside. My blush was very real. I swallowed hard. “H-how would I let him know that I liked him? That I wanted to go on a date with him?”
He leaned back against the fridge, looking mildly disappointed. He spoke evenly. “I s
uppose telling him would be the most straightforward way.” He crossed his arms over his chest, his speech turning into a growl as he spoke through gritted teeth. “Ask him out to dinner.” He straightened and walked out of the kitchen, uttering, “He won’t refuse you, Mina. He wouldn’t be so stupid.”
Oh, my Lord.
He was jealous.
Hallelujah!
My eyes on the open doorway, I heard Anika’s saccharine sympathy. “Mina…Vik won’t date you, honey.”
I laid a glare on her before raising my brow. “Who said anything about Vik?”
I followed Lev upstairs, allowing Anika to find the door on her own as she’d done many times before, and found myself standing outside the en suite in our bedroom. I raised my hand, knocking lightly. “Lev?”
“A moment,” he growled back.
I fought my smile, but my smile won. He opened the door and I jumped back from the force of it. It looked like he had just thrown water on his face, dew droplets still lingered at his jaw, and I wanted to lick them away.
“What is it, Mina? I need to get ready for my run,” he muttered unenthusiastically.
I stepped forward, reaching out with my hand. Lev took the offered hand, his shoulders slumping in relief, and he grasped at it like a lifeline.
I did that to him.
I did that for him.
Not Anika.
Me.
Smiling, I ran my thumb over his, looked up into his cool whiskey eyes, and asked, “Would you like to have dinner with me tonight, Lev?”
For a moment, he looked confused. “We eat dinner together every night.”
I nodded. “I know. I was hoping we could go out to eat. Together, just the two of us. Somewhere nice.” I kept going, because he didn’t seem to understand, just kept staring down at me, his brow low. “I’ll wear something pretty. You’ll wear something dapper.” My smile turned into a soft laugh and I shook my head in dismay. “You’re not making this easy on me, sweetie. Can’t you see I’m asking you out on a date?”
His brows rose. He didn’t speak a while, but then he confirmed, “You’re asking me, not Viktor.”
I blinked innocently. “Why would I ask Vik out? I’m not attracted to Vik.”
“You’re attracted to me,” he uttered, almost to himself, as if he needed the reassurance.
I didn’t bother with a response. I already told him he was the most handsome man I knew. I didn’t tell him he was sexy as hell and that I’d masturbated to the memory of his naked body as he stepped into the shower, but I was sure I would, eventually.
“Yes,” he responded quietly. “I would be honored to have dinner with you, Mina.”
I took our entwined hands apart and held his open palm at my cheek. My smile grew wider as I asked deliberately, “Lev,” I lowered my lashes. “Are you going to kiss me tonight?”
He ran his thumb over my lips. His eyes on the prize, he asked hoarsely, “Do you want me to?”
I landed a light peck to the pad of his thumb and he pressed it gently into my kiss as I whispered huskily, “Yes. Very much.”
“Me too,” he admitted. “And yes, I think I will.”
It was too much. I wanted to squeal from excitement, but had the sudden feeling that I would be sick, so I played it cool. Taking his hand from my cheek, I pressed a soft, lingering kiss to the center of his palm. “Can’t wait. What time?”
For the first time since I’d met him, Lev looked lost for words. “Um…”
“Six?” I prompted.
“Yes. Six.”
“Great.” I beamed and moved to leave the bedroom, stopping at the open door and turning. “Lev?”
He lifted his head to focus on me.
I leaned against the doorframe and admitted, “I’ve been imagining what you’d look like in a pair of jeans.” I straightened and winked. “Who knows? Maybe you’ll wear a pair tonight.” I looked down at his long legs. “For me.”
No hesitation. “Okay.”
My smile wide, I blew him a kiss from the door, rushed down the stairs, and ran all the way to Nastasia’s.
What was the process before one went on a date?
I didn’t have a flipping clue, but I knew Nas would.
Nas dressed me in a black dress with a pencil skirt that went to my knees and a high neck that showed none of my non-existent cleavage. Although I was close to my goal weight, I wasn’t quite there yet, but my knees were no longer knobby and I had flesh where flesh should have been. My breasts had yet to catch up with the rest of my body. My butt, however, was doing well.
Knowing how I walked in heels, Nas hooked me up with a pair of black leather strappy sandals, and I wore my white blazer over the top. My hair was left wavy but tamed, flowing down my back. Nas lent me a white clutch to put my phone and lip-gloss in, and I was ready to go.
I waited until five fifty-five before I walked back down to the house. Using the key Lev had given me, I unlocked the front door and stepped inside just as Lev was making his way down the stairs.
My breath left me in a whoosh. I was lucky that I held onto the door handle, or else I would’ve found myself sprawled on the floor in a dead faint.
Lev had found his jeans.
Oh, did he ever.
Jesus Christ, they fit him like a glove. His hair styled nicely, as always, he hadn’t shaved, leaving a nice five o’clock shadow playing at his jaw. The grey sweater he wore, pushed up to the elbows, was formfitting and stylish, and those black jeans…
Oh, God. He looked incredible.
My heart beat faster and my tongue began to swell.
It was hot in here. I fought the urge to fan my face.
I smiled shyly. “Hi.”
His eyes smiled back. “Hello.” The second to last step down, his eyes roamed my body. “You look stunning, Mina.”
“And you…” It was sweltering in here. “In jeans.” My eyes widened as I smiled and breathed, “Wow.”
His cheeks took on a pink tinge. He cleared his throat and asked, “I’m not underdressed, am I?”
Sweet cupcakes, if he changed out of those jeans, I would cry throughout dinner, spilling tears into my meal, and eating them up because I was hungry and not very picky.
I stepped forward and rushed out, “No, not at all. You look…” Sexy as fudge. “…very handsome, Lev.” I went on, “Don’t change.” I was slightly embarrassed when I said, “I like you in jeans.”
He met me at the door, holding his hand out. I took it, entwining our fingers. He looked down at me. “Ready?”
Lev led me out of the house and down the front steps. I let out a restless sigh. “Ready as I’ll ever be.”
Dinner was a quiet affair. Lev brought us to a little Russian place down an alley in the city.
I was touched. It seemed like he’d made an effort, wanting me to experience some part of him, however small it was.
We held hands until after we seated. Lev asked questions about me, and I answered each of his questions with enthusiasm, only asking him the most basic of questions. I didn’t want to spook him. I’d learned that both his mother and father were Russian immigrants, that Lev liked to play sports but not watch them, that he preferred blackberry jam to all others, that he had cousins in New York who he adored, that he liked to read rather than watch TV, and that he had a double degree in business and mathematics, which he completed at the ripe old age of twenty-one.
We ordered a few different dishes and shared them. Lev insisted we get the stroganoff, which was light and creamy, and the beef was cooked till beautifully tender. Next we ordered the blini, which were thin crepes filled with an array of fillings, from smoked salmon and cream cheese, to sour cream and caviar. Lastly, we got the pelmeni, and they were delicious dumplings filled with minced lamb, garlic, and herbs.
We cleared all the dishes, even though we ordered for six people. And, damn Lev, but even the way he ate was sexy!
Lev reached for the last pelmeni, but must have spotted the forlorn look on my face. He
shook his head, his lip might have twitched (or maybe I imagined it), and he placed the last dumpling on my plate.
I ate it with nothing more than a smile, and Lev continued to watch me, a soft look on his face. Once our dishes were cleared, he reached out across the small table, and with a shy smile, I placed my hands in his.
He held them in silence, stroking his thumbs over mine.
Oh, boy. I was ready for that kiss.
He checked his watch. “Shall we head off? We start work in forty-five minutes.”
I stood quickly. “Yeah, I’m ready.”
Ready for you to kiss the shit out of me!
Lev took care of the check, cocooned my hand in his own, and then walked us to the car. “Our date…it was nice.”
“Yeah,” I murmured in agreement. “We should do it again.”
He let go of my hand, helping me into the car.
Hmmm.
No kiss.
He drove in silence, my fingers playing with his across the center console. Before long, we were at the club and stepping out of the car.
This was it. I could feel it.
I waited for him to open my door, stepping out gracefully. I smiled up at him and his eyes returned the sentiment. He placed his arm around my shoulders, pulling me into his side. “Come on. We have work to do.”
I understood that. I wouldn’t dream of being unprofessional, not when I had been handed this opportunity when I literally had nothing. And yet, as we walked on into the club, disappointment filled me, and one thought circled my mind.
Where’s my damned kiss, Leokov?
Chapter Twenty-Five
Mina
Service was slow this evening. Although we only had four of the smaller tables empty, we were all feeling the tension. Were the customers we’d lost to Aphrodite’s Kiss lost to us forever?
The thought scared the crap out of me, being that it meant I would be out of a job. I couldn’t afford to be out of a job. I had a very delicate subject to bring up with Lev. That subject being me moving out.