Chapter 14
Passion
When he stopped, I was sleepy, which was strange, he’d been running, not me. He showed no waste of breath or lack of energy. Not even a puff of air wasted. Had he even breathed in that run?
He eased me from his grip, standing beside him, taking in my surroundings with wonder. Dense woods all around with a cottage by a large lake.
Where are we?
“Least four hours west of Kenneth.”
Why did you bring me here?
“I had to get you away. We’ll be safe here.”
But … my mother.
“Don’t worry about her.” Ethan turned, flipped his phone from his pocket, and started making calls.
Strange it worked here at all. I eyed the cottage and Ethan nodded. “It’s unlocked. Go on in. I need to get some things sorted first.”
He was distracted, and I was confused. One moment I was at my house, standing out the front, and Tristan was threatening to take me away to the Master; for what reason, he wouldn’t say. Now, here, in a cottage four hours from Kenneth minutes later—hours from home. Was that right? Entering into the cottage, I was pleased to find it was free of cobwebs. A comfy lounge facing a fireplace with a kitchenette facing the east, and all the luxuries of being in a cottage. I spied Ethan, pacing the front yard; he scanned the woods constantly while he was talking.
“Yes. Please do. Thanks Caleb. I’ll be in touch.” And just like that, he was walking towards me. “Judith is going to spend time with your mum. Caleb is going to place a false memory with your mum that you’re on a camping trip with Erika.”
She … won’t believe that.
“She will. Trust me. It’s better this way. Some memory is better than none. Tristan won’t cause trouble with her.”
How can you be sure?
“Because he followed us. And it’s you he wants. Don’t worry. I won’t let anything happen. This place is safe. He won’t find us here.”
But if he followed us. …
“I spent the better part of that run, confusing my scent for leagues in all directions before I stopped off here. Do you trust me?”
Yes.
His jaw clenched. “I’m sorry if I frightened you.”
You didn’t. Everything is so … and I mean. I am trying to understand all that’s happened. Tristan? That vision? Why did you make me forget?
“I thought it’d be easier if you didn’t know. Marcus was right, you wouldn’t have told anyone. Trancing you was hard. You’re Fae. You block us. Takes strength and power to trance you and it took all three of us to make you forget about Tristan that day.”
I remember now, I remember it all. Tristan is your brother. He keeps calling you his older brother. But that’s not right.
“He …” Ethan moved to the fireplace. He started to stack logs inside. “Take a seat. We’ll be here awhile.” He kept his face turned away from me.
Are you not going to tell me?
He was silent for a time.
“I want to tell you everything Kera. My life, my secrets, my abilities, what it’s like, where I grew up, and who I met in the past.” He glanced to me, before reaching for paper to crunch into the open fireplace. “But I don’t want to scare you. What I am, what I do, being a vampire and all that we are.”
So … start with the basics, I said, sitting on the sofa, and melting into the comfort instantly. Ethan nodded with a wry smile as he reached for the matches by the top mantel. Do you sleep in a coffin?
“Course not. We don’t sleep … well, we can. If we’re relaxed and less likely to be bothered by anything. We can sleep; like a cat nap, though we hear everything, see, feel … well. Not emotional feeling.”
What about sunlight and stakes.
“No and yes. Sun doesn’t burn us, unless it’s in large doses and usually it just makes us ill. Fire can damage us. Wooden stakes laced with magic are one way to kill us. But it doesn’t always kill us. Splinters can be a bit of a problem though.” He paused, nodding to his thoughts with a side glance, he continued. “Our hearts are different to yours. A thick crust is around it, stopping sharp tools getting to it, and if it does touch the heart, we are paralysed. We appear dead, but as soon as the stake is removed. We wake up and feed instantly with a rage we can’t control.”
Have you been staked before?
Ethan clenched his jaw, lighting the fire and fanning it to watch as the flames caught on the logs. He turned them around, adding more paper and twigs to the flame before moving away from the fireplace, and sitting beside me. He reached out, taking my hand in his, to tease my knuckles with his thumb. For a long time, he was silent, staring at my hand and listening to the fire crackling to life. My breath was shallow, waiting for an answer he clearly didn’t want to give me. I relaxed more with him beside me, thinking it over. Vampires, Fae and all that happened in the past few days. The attack yesterday at lunch time was so much smaller. Remembering last night when he walked me home; and in that single moment, everything changed.
Do you have to be invited inside?
“Yes. It’s a small flaw, but one that is binding by the dead and the living. You had to invite me to your home. I can’t ask, and I can’t actually say: Invite me in. It has to be a trust from the human to offer it. Since you wanted me inside … you said: You’re going to come in here and talk to me.” He chuckled at the memory. And with a nod, he continued.
“I was born in Seattle on May seventh 1867; I had a mother, a father and four younger siblings. I was studying to be a Master in the Arts. At nineteen, I moved to New York, thinking I’d get my break in the art life. I was foolish and stupid. I got drunk in a bar the first night, and found myself in a fight I wouldn’t survive.
“The men, who beat me, did a good job. I was left to die in the alley, covered in grime, filth, and blood. Unable to move, to call for help, and so, I waited for death to take me. Caleb came instead. I thought he was an angel; he smiled at me, asked me if I wanted to live. At the time I did. I was dying and afraid. I had let my family down; I didn’t want to be another disappointment. He told me:
“If I’m to save you. It will be at a price.”
“Anything,” I breathed. I didn’t care.
“You will be a creature of the night, while you will hunger for a thirst that is not water, and one that will never be fully satisfied, you will live forever. You will never age and will never die. You will be a vampire.”
“Even I knew the stories of vampires. I knew what he was asking, and I agreed to live a life of immortality. I awoke several days later, a new vampire—a Dundine.” Ethan paused. He studied me in the firelight for several seconds before continuing.
“Caleb introduced me to his world. I had a raging thirst for blood as all young vampires do. He showed me how to control it, how to live and not kill. Drinking off the blood of animals on a daily basis gave me strength and with each animal I drained, I was stronger. But not as strong as I knew I could be. Vampires crave blood, it’s the binding essences that makes us immortal, but we also have an ability to crave power, the hidden power humans can’t see, but all vampires seek. Sometimes it appears in a halo around objects or people. We as vampires have a power inside of us. We can use it for good or evil. Strigoi usually always kill their victums, but Dundine and Moroi don’t. It’s near impossible for us to kill our victims, because we can feel their emotions, their thoughts. Strigoi don’t have that ability. For a long time I was lead to believe that if I did kill, I’d lose my soul; and that I’d become a Strigoi, but it’s not true. It’s just living on the edge and mostly it’s ignoring the emotions that live dormant within us.
“I learnt to hone my power, able to read minds, ciphering through what humans thought and wanted. I could trance them into a dream like state; taking them to a place they have never been. The trance could never last too long. Humans can’t stay in our control forever, and usually they will find a way around it; fearing us, avoiding us, and in some cases, killing themselves in fear of what has happened. On
ce I tasted human blood, I wanted more.
“For a time we used fleshers, those we call our blood. The people in question knew about us, and were willing to be tranced for the pleasure of the bite.”
“We don’t kill humans. Caleb is against it, he has refused human blood for three centuries now. Me, a few decades. I know I told you this already, but you have to understand. As a vampire, all we crave is blood. It’s what we need and live for. We have no human emotions to be controlled by. Life is simple for us, limitless in some ways, and a burden in others. Feeding on the emotion of blood allows us to feel, to understand emotion, and sometimes it becomes a craving to know more, to feel more; the essences at least.” He sighed.
The essence?
“Human emotions are deep inside, hidden under layers of unthought ideas, lost dreams. Love, passion, even happiness; these I have not felt until now, and I didn’t have to feed to feel it.” His eyes held on me, his lips parted. He turned his attention to the fire.
“Living with humans has some advantages. We can predict an emotion; mimic it if we have to. But to feel it, that’s nearly impossible. While I see Caleb and Judith express emotion, and even Marcus and Erika. I never paid attention to it or desired it. My first day at this school was amusing and slow. I could feel everyone’s mind, thoughts and emotions rolling, turning on and around in waves. To block them out is easy enough, but you.
“Your thoughts couldn’t be blocked out Kera, no matter how hard I tried. You were sheltered, shy and sad, but pleading to be heard. I told myself not to get involved, and yet, you were there, suffering a great sadness. I had lived alone and in darkness for so long, that when I felt your mind, it reflected mine, I wanted to know more. Slowly your thoughts jumped out at me. I made the mistake of saying the A-Team in the first conversation, and answering your thoughts in others. When you direct words, it feels as if you have spoken, and to me—I can hear it. But that wasn’t all I discovered. You’re a Fae, as I told you.
“When Caleb checked you in the doctor’s office, he too confirmed it. You were showing signs of the energy; drawing on the elements around you. Flickering lights, making others turn away from you; letting them think you were a part of the wall; becoming non-existent in a room of gathering students. Teenagers were more acceptable of this power, the teachers not so much. The older the mind, the harder to fool.” Ethan pressed his lips together.
“When I discovered you in the clearing that first day after school, you thought I was going to kill you. And that shocked me more than I realised. I hid in the shadows, as the wolf watching you; you were relaxed, and insisted I come out of hiding. While you asked me repeatedly to end your life, I couldn’t do that, even if I’m a predator.
“This ability is similar to a vampire trancing their victims. Not as strong, but close. And yesterday, when Brant—” Ethan paused, his fist clenched. He glared into the fire as it crackled and sparked. “What they did, and what they were doing. You had no voice to scream, to yell for help.” Ethan sucked in a deep breath, and hissed in his next words. “I hated that I arrived so late. I shouldn’t have let anything happen to you. And, if it wasn’t for your power to show me words and images stopping me from killing Brant. Those boys would be in pieces, not just a broken jaw.” He shifted, restless with his words. My mind raced to the memory of the damage I had caused. Good—they deserved it. They were worse than animals.
I thought it was Melody, and it hit Brant with force, the drugs didn’t help. I almost took you out too. You kept talking to me, answering me. You … didn’t even show fear. Marcus, he did. Why?
“You … spoke to him, not the first time. You didn’t know you were controlling the pole, but he did. Since you can’t speak in voice, it seeps within your mind, as if it were a sixth sense for me and my kind to grasp. You spoke to him and me, confused as you were you were able to make the words.
“Your voice was amusing unpredictable, since you spoke to me; and when I took you away to the cliff top, you named me, Spirit. You drew my picture, and smiled whenever you saw me. And I wanted to see more of your beautiful smile. And each time I came, you would push your hair from your face; watching me with curiosity, and asking me things I couldn’t answer, but I managed to make you smile. That day you came upon us in the woods; the day you saw all three of us, was the day the others discovered what was going on. I was angry when Marcus showed up in the garden.”
Showed up? When?
“The owl.”
Oh, you can turn into owls as well?
“We can become a predator of some kind. Wolf, Owl, Caleb likes his lion form more.
So. The owl was Marcus?
Ethan nodded. “He constantly bugged me, and then claimed he was keeping an eye on me. He was worried I’d chosen a Flesher—”
And … that’s bad. To be a vampire with a flesher?
“That’s usually how a Strigoi is created. A Dundine will find someone who has a scent that is so powerful they will end up killing them. The day Tristan showed up and I called Caleb and Marcus, and we tranced you into forgetting about what you’d seen, was the day I confessed everything. I wanted them to understand how much this affected me. I realised it was a mistake. Sitting in the garden that afternoon, you were so happy I had spoken to you. I wanted to take back what I had done, but it was too late. I couldn’t stand the guilt. Staying away on Thursday made it so much harder. I hated I’d distanced myself from you, and you were so upset with me, you wanted to talk to me, and I did too.
“Caleb said a love between human and vampire was uncommon, but I was falling for you. I knew too late that my heart that has not worked in over a century, was now beating with an emotion I’d only ever read in books, watched on TV and seen through those around me. But to feel it, to know I feel more than just a reaction to what is expected, takes my breath away. When I touch you.” His hand reached out, touching the side of my jaw. I trembled as he did too. “I feel alive with you. Alive and willing to do anything, be anything for you.” His fingers caressed my face, tracing along my chin before dropping away and I yearned for his touch.
His cold fingers held warmth that I wanted. My heart fluttered with the words he’d spoken. He loved me. He was a vampire, a wolf, and he loved me. I loved him. That wasn’t going to change. I reached for his hand. His fingers curled into mine, as he leant closer. Inch by inch, we leaned inward, taking in his silver green eyes, his long lashes were a dark brown, onyx. The smoothness of his chiselled jaw line; the dimple of his chin and the shape of his mouth became my focus. I pressed my lips together, dry as they were. I didn’t want to pull away now. His fingers came to my face, leaning into his palm, feeling the tenderness and the gentle strength within them, as he slowly edged closer. His lips pressed to mine.
My first kiss.
The touch was numbing, as his mouth parted and my lips moved with his, my breath inhaled as did his. Moving my lips with his, as the kiss increased with desire, want and need. Reaching to him, kissing deeper and longer as his mouth moved gently; he cupped my face, leaning to me. Slowing the kiss, he sucked in my lower lip to peck my nose, and lean his brow on mine. His smile touched his eyes. “You’re my heart,” he whispered. “I won’t let anything bad happen to you—ever again.”
I touched his face, his eyes fluttered at the sensation of my finger tracing along his nose, over his lips and stopping at his pointed chin.
You’re my heart too.
“Are you sure you want this. Me …A vampire as your … love?”
I can’t stop now Ethan. You want this as much as I do. Why would I change my mind now? I frowned. Am I too much for you? Is us … dating not a good idea?
“It’s perfect.” He brushed my hair from my brow; tracing a finger along my nose to my chin, mimicking my actions on him. He leant in with a soft kiss to my lips. “You’re perfect.”
He pulled me to his chest, running his hands along my shoulder. I looked into his eyes. He was a vampire; an attractive vampire, and all mine. I smiled to my thoughts
as he returned it, leaning in to kiss me; I melted to it. Palming his face as the passion rose inside. His lips parted, and his tongue graced along mine. Moving his lips along my jaw in small circles, losing myself in his embrace I slipped under him, shifting my legs around his hips, my arms around his neck, as his kiss caressed my neck. A ripple stirred through him, a tremble of pleasure quivered within as small unnatural points grazed my neck. Whoa—
“I’m sorry.”
In a blink n, Ethan pulled away fast. I was left lying on the sofa, and he was standing at the fireplace with his back to me. Lost to the passion and confused with his absents, I had enough time to see his face change. He had been the Dundine. His eyes glowed yellow for the briefest of moments, turning black in a beat. The skin around his eyes resembled a series of black blemishes. Veins of lightning strikes under his eyes and across his forehead. Two fangs lingered in my view for milliseconds before receding away to normal teeth. Ethan turned away, palming his face to hide.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.” He kept his back to me, staring at the flames.
I sat up. It’s okay Ethan, I understand.
“No. You don’t.” He dropped to his haunches, poking the fire several times. “I should never have done that. I thought I was in control today.” He stabbed the wood with irritation. “It was the passion. The pleasure of being with you … near you. It’s so strong. So real.” He rocked on the balls of his feet, continuing to poke the flames before adding another log to the fire. Shame was visible in his actions.
It’s okay, I whispered.
“It’s not.” He stood just as swiftly. “I should get you some food.”
And before I could blink—he was gone.