Chapter 13
Heart
I stared at nothing as my thoughts tumbled. It may have been minutes ago that Ethan brought me home from the woods or might have been an hour. Sitting me on the sofa, he’d retrieved a glass of water for me. For the most part, I was silent. I’d made no comment, no words towards him. My thoughts were jumbled. My mind was consumed with what was, and what I’d read, what I knew, what I felt. I didn’t know where to begin and in truth, the puzzle pieces were all tugged free. The realisation wasn’t just that Ethan was a vampire, it was the truth; he was also Spirit. The one and the same. The familiar eyes, the same character when he winked at me, the same curious eyes when he watched me, smiled. That wasn’t all that I had discovered. He was a Dundine. A race of the three vampires I’d read about this week … days ago? Vampires lived in groups. That’s what he was. That’s what Marcus and Erika were. His whole family? I remembered the passage that stated Dundine live in a family group, usually a mother and father environment. He didn’t eat. He hated the sun, avoiding it and only ever in small doses, he could read my thoughts.
Was that why he could? Because he was a vampire? This didn’t explain why they were attacking other wolves.
I stared at the glass on the table, I hadn’t moved since I’d sat a time ago—could have been days. I blinked in shock, my thoughts started to unravel; I peeked to Ethan beside me. The crease on his forehead told me he’d been listening. He’d been listening to all I was thinking, and knowing what I thought was true; he didn’t try and stop me from learning the truth. Before the other wolves showed up he was about to tell me. He said it would make me afraid of him, that I’d change my feelings towards him. It hadn’t. I didn’t feel any different towards him than I had before. I felt drawn to him, knowing him as the guy who spoke to me. The one who helped me escape the cruelty of the B-Team and I knew deep down part of me always knew—he was Spirit. The puzzle was together now, right. He was a vampire. He was able to read my thoughts. He was able to turn into a grey wolf … What else could he do? Did it matter? He was still Ethan, the cute boy who sat next to me at school, listening to my thoughts, waiting patiently beside me as I gathered my tumbled emotions. Where do I begin with this? And all that could pop into my head was.
What was I going to do about it?
His lips parted, ready to say something and I held my hand up to stop him.
I’m not done thinking yet. I thought to him. This is big. Really big. And—no. I’m not changing my mind. I don’t want to change how I feel about you. I still like you. And so what if you’re a vampire. I don’t care. I turned to him, facing him square on. Is this what you were saying before? How humans don’t usually get involved with vampires because I’m actually food for you.
“Not for me,” he said at last, though I doubt it was his first choice of words. “You’re not food.” His voice was low, just for me.
I could hear Elizabeth in the far room. She’d heard us come in but hadn’t paid us any mind. Though the silence wasn’t that hard to live with.
So, you’re not going to kill me, or feed off me?
“No.” Ethan searched my face for fear or worry. It was something I had pleaded with Spirit all those weeks ago. “You’re not afraid.” He studied my reaction.
Er … should I be.
“Most are. Most can’t think it’s normal, possible, and some even avoid dealing with it. Unless they’re one of the addicts or loyal followers.”
So, this makes me … strange, right.
“Not to me. You’re not strange to me, You’re beautiful to me.” He leaned in closer.
I stiffened, not in fear. Okay, maybe it was fear. He was about to kiss me. I’d never been kissed. Was I ready? Last night, played on my thoughts. Last night was different to now, but No. I wasn’t ready for a kiss. His eyes narrowed with a clench of his jaw and a crease of his brow he paused in leaning closer. He was reading my thoughts. “I won’t push you.” He slipped to his side of the sofa.
So. You’re still unsure about us then?
“I don’t want to frighten you.”
You’re not. I’m not afraid of you. I shifted. I just need a moment to think it all through. I’m not going to change how I feel. You think I will?
“It’s not that you will change your mind. It’s that I wish not to cause you more trouble, pain or anything that isn’t normal.”
I don’t have a normal life now. I can’t go back to what was. I’m nothing before. I don’t want to lose you … I don’t want to live in my fog anymore. Not now, not while I can have you. I swallowed hard on the lump in my throat. Fighting my emotions, the fear of losing him.
He’s the one person who can talk to me and I can’t lose that. The lights by the side lamp started to flicker, making me frown. Great, now there was a wiring problem at home too. Ethan turned his attention to the lamp.
“I … I know what you saw before was … mind blowing. I need you to take a breath and relax. I won’t stop listening to you. Promise.” He waited until I took a deep breath and the lamp stopped flickering before he spoke. “While you know my secret, I need to tell you yours.”
My secret? I stared at him dumbly. I don’t have a secret, well … it was about a wolf running round the woods that turned out to be you. I rambled.
His finger touched my lip, stilling me.
“You’re a Fae.”
I blinked. Meaning?
“You have fairy blood in you. You’re human, yes. You have … energy in you. I am both, drawn and protective of it. Fae are rare among the supernaturals. Especially three-quarter Fae.”
Three-quarter Fae?
“You’re father most likely was full blood. Your mother has little memory of him. Your friend Melody was the same. Fae usually seek one another out, finding strength together. It’s risky. When Fae start showing signs of power, they leave a trace in the air that my kind can track. Strigoi hunted your kind to extinction.”
And … you think I am … Fae, and that was why those other wolves showed up.
“Yes and no. Those wolves were Dundine. Few of my kind live on the side of shadow, following Strigoi. But I don’t think you are Fae. I know you are. I tasted your blood … when you fell. I had to heal you. But your blood smelt so—” He stopped talking. “You’re not food. You’re a sweet girl that lost her friend and you happen to have a great power inside you. The flickering lights, the pole. That’s your power as a Fae. The ability to move objects, to make illusions and glamour ones thoughts, to feel the emotions of those around you. Young as you are, your power is remarkably strong. I knew from the first moment I walked into that room two weeks ago. Since your accident, your power has … changed. Instead of feeling emotions of others. You force your thoughts and feeling into them. Humans don’t feel it. But … my kind can.” He was silent for a time, as I absorbed his words.
I was a Fae. Melody too. We were able to … the flickering lights, at the school. The pole that smashed into Brant, knocking him out. Ethan had said it wasn’t Melody; she is just a thought, not a ghost trapped here. She was my imagination. But the attack of Brant wasn’t imaginary, nor was the wolves attacking me. But it was all real. Him. Me. My feelings for him are real. I don’t care if I am a Fae. He’s a vampire. We’re both different for a reason.
“You have to understand. I’m a vampire, you’re a human. You have all the emotions of any normal teenager and I … I have small amounts of emotion. Trigged and enhanced by the act of blood drinking. Vampires can’t feel anything that a human can. Happiness, jealousy, anger … love. Any one of these emotions is dormant within us, hidden and possibly never brought to the surface.”
You can’t feel love? My heart quickened at the thought.
“Hmmm …” He smiled amused, his green eyes blinked. “I thought I couldn’t. I never gave myself the thought before. The idea to find another. I didn’t think of love as possible, until I met you.”
I inhaled at his words. Did I hear him right? He loved me. I already knew how I felt about him. I had
accepted that for a while now, but he wanted me to. Not just to talk to.
“I’m a predator. The blood lust is all that calls to me. The endless need to feed is a burning within that will never stop. To live through the pleasure of blood, makes my life bearable. But now I found another reason to live. Another pleasure that I’m not so sure I want to walk away from, I can’t walk away now, not without knowing if what I feel is real or just a dream.”
And if it was a dream.
“I’d never want to wake.” He reached out, touching my chin with his thumb.
I was frozen; lost to his touch, his stare.
“I feel things I can’t explain. I know it’s wrong, it’s not normal for me to feel this way about a human. I wanted to stop, I tried to avoid your thoughts or your images, but I couldn’t. I was intrigued and slowly that progressed to deeper curiosity, which became more frequent in what I was doing. I thought it was just the Fae in you, the mystical energy that calls to us all and than I told myself it was because of your situation. You’re alone, you were craving another to talk to, and I watched you endlessly, I followed you constantly. You were so pure in ways I’d never known a human to be, calm as your thoughts were; they drew me towards you with so much want. I wanted to know you. And I can’t stop wanting to know you. After yesterday with Brant and his friends, I decided then and there, you were never to be alone. It was why I answered your thoughts, accepting you as you are. I wanted you to be able to talk to me without worry. I wanted you to trust me.” He leaned in slowly, as I was to him. “Are you afraid of me?”
No.
“Are you afraid of what I am?”
No. I repeated. It doesn’t matter, not to me. I don’t care what you are because you’ve made me feel things I didn’t know I could either. I smiled, lifting my eyes to his. Will I be too much for you?
“No Kera.”
But I’m human … I mean. Fae. Don’t you want to feed off me?
“Your blood is not what I crave. Though, powerful; like all blood. Yours is sweet, luring yes. But it’s like you’re made for me to care for, not feed from.” Ethan pressed his hand to my neck; teasing my skin with the tips of his fingers, to trace slowly to the nape of my ear lobe. I shivered and blushed at the touch and the seduction it offered. “You’re the sweetest thing, and I will never hurt you.” His face was inches from mine, inching closer with each word he spoke until his cheek rested on mine; to hear his breath inhale, he pulled away suddenly to sit straighter on the sofa.
I frowned at his unexpected mood change. My thoughts were burning with a question when Elizabeth entered from the laundry room.
“There you are. I thought I heard you come in. Oh, Ethan. You’re still here.” She beamed, but even I could read it as a warning.
She wasn’t born yesterday as she constantly told me and Melody. She knows all about being young once. But this was different, since this was the first boy I brought home … who happened to be a vampire.
“Er … will the two of you stay for lunch?” She asked, stepping into the lounge room.
I was about to nod when Ethan drew himself from the couch.
“Actually, Ms Watson; I was hoping to shout Kera a meal down at the local shop, if that was all right. Was there anything you needed while we were down there?”
“Oh, that’s nice of you. Um …” She turned and reached for the stash of coins on the side table. “I’ll need you to get some milk.” There was a heavy note in her voice; she wanted me to return within a decent hour.
“I’ll make sure she doesn’t forget.” Ethan smiled wide, offering his hand to me, pulling me from the chair. I wasn’t worried about going with him, even if he hadn’t asked me. He wanted to talk to me. He wanted to show me his world.
“Thank you Ethan. Er … Kera. Do you want a jacket? Their might be chance of a thunderstorm.”
I glanced at Ethan. His eye shined as he nodded.
I had to release his hand to head upstairs, looking for a decent jacket; I needed to take a minute to breathe. I stared in the mirror wondering if this was it. This was when all I ever knew was going to change. I’d already crossed the bridge on the supernatural, but how much more could there be? How much more did I want to know? And Ethan did like me. My lips tilted upward with that thought. It was a nice feeling, to think it possible and to feel the same. I closed my eyes and remembered this morning. I was a nervous wreck waiting for him, and now, I was delaying time with him! No. I needed to get out there and find out all I could. There was no turning back. I liked him, more than I should because he was a vampire? No. Because I’d never liked anyone as much I liked him and none had paid any attention to me as he was. With another quick glance in the mirror, I reached for my light jacket and bounced down the stairs.
“Don’t be out all day Kera,” called Elizabeth as I came to the foot of the stairs where Ethan stood waiting for me. He was admiring my drawing of Spirit—him. His smile was worth the wait. I pocketed the coins and my keys before heading out the door and towards his car when a motorbike thundered past to do a wide arch. It pulled into our drive with a loud roar before cutting silent.
“Kera. Go inside for me.”
Course, I couldn’t move the moment I saw this motorbike. Familiar, like the wolf and Ethan. They were one and the same, and this man dressed in black, climbed from his bike with a pull of his helmet. My thoughts flooding to me, gasping at the realisation of who, and what and … and … Oh, my … This was another piece … Caleb? Marcus? The street, the motorbike, Stacy Gilbert; it all flooded into me with force. Ethan kept his eyes on … Tristan.
“We meet again brother.”
“What do you want?” His snarl was strong, his anger was clear.
“To talk and well. Let you know, found the Master.”
“Good. So go.”
“Can’t do.”
“Not here.”
“Here is where we are.”
“No. Not here. Go inside Kera. Now.”
“Well, actually I need her.”
“No. You don’t need her for anything.”
“Well, seems the Master does and since she’s what I need.” He took a step towards us.
Ethan grabbed me. Wrapped his arms around me with such care, I was swept into his embrace, and the next thing I knew. We were moving.
Fast too.
Trees were a blur, wind in my face; everything was melting behind me, Leaving it all behind. Like the time I ran away on the back of Spirit. This time I was in Ethan’s arms. The one and the same.