“I won’t leave her,” I say.
“You might not have a choice.” His eyes, still locked on mine, harden.
“You can’t do that to her? To me—”
“You don’t understand. These are my orders. I can’t just throw my arms up in the air and leave you here, although there’re times I want to. I’m trying to do the right thing, but you make it so damn hard sometimes. I respect what you’re doing—really I do. But I’m telling you now that this can’t go on much longer. It’s starting to look suspicious,” he says. The grimace on his face makes my insides freeze with flashbacks of the execution.
“They don’t seriously think it’s like that… Do they?”
“Lexi? Are you here?” Alyssa interrupts our quiet conversation.
“I’m right here.” I run to her side. She lies under multiple blankets and no longer has the strength to sit up on her own. “What do you need?”
“Can I try some ice chips?” she rasps.
“Sure thing. I’ll be right back.”
I leave the room and rush down the hall. Amber isn’t at her usual post, but that doesn’t surprise me. I pass the linen closet on my way to the small kitchen area. Heavy breathing and the sound of scuffling feet force me to stop. It sounds like someone’s messing around in the closet. I tip toe into the kitchen, fill a glass with ice chips, and scurry past the closet. This time I know I’m not imagining things.
Someone’s definitely in there.
Curiosity wins over as I quietly set the glass down and turn the knob. It’s dark inside, but there’s enough light to see two figures. As I peek through the small viewing space, I decipher a male and female kissing passionately. I’m shocked. I didn’t know there was a male on the floor aside from Cole. Sutton went home an hour ago. I pull the door closed, pick up the glass and hurry back to Alyssa’s room, all while wondering whom it was.
“Thank you.” Alyssa’s been propped up with at least four pillows. “Cole helped me up while you were gone.” She smiles at me. I glance at him, but he’s already asleep. My mind is distracted.
“Can you wait another minute? I’ll be right back.” I ask and she nods her head while attempting to suck on an ice chip. I peek into the hallway. Amber walks toward me, fixes her hair, and surveys her surroundings.
“Where were you?”
Her hands fly up to her face and she jumps at the sound of my voice. She composes herself and says, “I took a fifteen-minute break. Why do you care?”
A few yards behind her, a guard enters the hallway from the linen closet. Amber looks at him, at me, and then at him. Disgusting. He’s tall like the others and wears a rigid, collared uniform. His relaxed stride proves that he’s not worried about getting caught. We’re all standing in the hallway now.
“What’s the problem?” He directs his question to me.
“Umm, nothing,” I stammer, putting my hand on the wall for support.
“She was just asking me for something, Zane. There’s no problem.” Her fearful eyes fix on me as she replies.
“Then why are the both of you standing in the hallway looking stupid?” His question is more of a statement. He tugs at his collar and steps toward me with a smile on his face. It’s cold and doesn’t reach his eyes. “Would you like to have a good time too? I can grant you special privileges around here if you make the right choice.”
His bold offer renders me speechless. My hand reaches for the doorway behind me. He steps closer and Amber nervously fiddles with her hands. Just then, Zeus plows into the hallway, snarling, and stands in front of me. A low growl comes from deep within his chest and fur stands up on his back.
“Back off, Zane. She’s not interested.” Cole’s voice cuts through the tension. Relief comes over me but quickly dissipates when I see his hand move toward the gun strapped on his leg. He unceremoniously sweeps me behind him into Alyssa’s room and reaches to close the door all without ever taking his eyes off Zane. Zeus dashes inside behind me and whines while I stand against the wall. An altercation takes place, but their low voices make it hard to decipher. After a few minutes, Cole reappears.
“What happened?” I ask, trying to mask the fear in my voice.
“Zane’s been reaping victims tonight. You almost became one.” He sits on his cot and attempts to unlace his boots. His fingers fumble with haste so he gives up with an exasperated sigh.
“You mean Amber didn’t choose to do that?” I ask.
He swallows in frustration. “Oh no, she chose to go. She likes the attention and the privileges that come with it. It’s hard to earn a living here if you don’t have some means of doing it.”
“She was scared though…”
“Because we all know what happens when sinners defy guards.”
“So you’re telling me that she slept with him for extra benefits?” Ugh. Sometimes people are exactly what you think they are.
“People do all sorts of things in this place. It’s not black and white like you think.”
“Did you know she was doing that? Have you—?” I can’t even finish the sentence.
“Yes, I’ve known for a while. And no, I haven’t and wouldn’t do that, ever.” I let out a sigh of relief, willing my mind not to think of him doing something so disgusting. “Don’t worry about it; that’s why I’m here, plus Zeus woke me up when he heard Zane outside. So there’s no doubt you have the best team protecting you.” He collapses on his cot, not even bothering to take off his guns. I’m starting to love that dog. I make my way over to Alyssa’s bed.
“Is everything okay?” Alyssa’s concern humbles me.
“I’m fine. Just a mix up in the hallway. Nothing to worry about.” I brush it off for her sake.
“I hate those guards,” she whispers as if she is afraid they can hear her through the walls. She gives a small cough and tries to get comfortable again. “Are you sure you are okay? The way Zeus bolted out of here I thought something really bad happened.”
“One of the guards decided he wanted to try to push me around, but it’s okay, really. I’m fine. Zeus is quite the protector from evil.” I stroke her head and help her settle down to sleep.
“You’re lucky you have Cole. He’s the only good one.”
“Yeah, he’s good, but he’s still a guard.” I make a face, and her laugh sounds like tinkling bells.
“I heard that,” Cole says. Alyssa laughs louder and I roll my eyes.
After a few minutes of playful bantering, Cole lies down and falls asleep in one motion. I sit on Alyssa’s bed and braid a few small strands of her hair as she stares at me.
“Doesn’t it scare you that you might never be free?” Her playful expression turns serious, and her crystal-blue eyes pierce me. “I can’t imagine being as pretty as you, and having all those guards around. If it were me, I’d try to find a way to escape,” she whispers; her eyes dart to the door and her hands shake at just the thought.
“Lexi, can I ask you something?” She raises her searching eyes to mine.
“Sure, you can ask me anything. You know that.”
“If you got out of here, where would you go?”
“Now, that’s easy. I’d have to say Lexington Bay… if I could ever find it. Hey, what about you? Where would you go?”
“Anywhere would be better than here. But I don’t know what’s beyond the Hole.” She sighs with disappointment.
“I’m afraid it’s not much better really.”
“Anything has to be better than this.” Alyssa’s eyes snap to mine with the desire for knowledge.
“Well… after my father died, my mom remarried and we had to leave the countryside, so I spent the rest of my time in High Society—where what’s left of the wealthy live. It’s a northern city, the largest one left… which isn’t saying much since only 1/18 of it remains after the war. Outside High Society, we’re surrounded by poverty and beggars just like the Hole.”
“Really?” Alyssa says.
“Yup, really. Anyway, pretty much everyone live
s in terror, trying to survive without being accused—money doesn’t always buy them freedom. It just happens to be the luck of the draw. If they’re accused by someone who’s got a vendetta against them then they get arrested… It’s so sick and twisted. I hate it there too. There are a lot of empty houses and abandoned buildings. Not much to see, nothing to enjoy, and really no life anymore. Mostly everyone stays in their homes, only going out for errands and things like that.”
“Did you go to school? I used to love learning…”
“Yeah, they still have school, although it’s pretty warped what they teach. I’m lucky my dad taught me a lot from home.”
Alyssa’s eyes drop to her hands, disappointed. “I wonder if my family’s still alive.”
“If they are, it’s because of you.” I take her hand in mine to reassure her.
“I want to be cremated,” Alyssa blurts out.
“Where did that come from?” I blink with surprise.
“I had a dream about it. Please, promise me you won’t let them put me in a box and bury me where bugs can eat my body.”
“Sure, if that’s what you want, I’ll do it for you.” I clasp her hand harder and feel the tears well up in my eyes.
“If you ever get out, take my ashes and spread them in the ocean, would you?” She’s so mature for thirteen I forget sometimes she’s just a child. “I’m not afraid of dying anymore because I know you’ll be with me.” She smiles faintly while clutching my hand. “But you know what? I think dying is easier compared to living here.”
When she finishes, tears obscure my vision. I hug her as tightly as I think I can without hurting her. I know exactly what she means. I was in that place not too long ago, where taking my life would’ve been easier than continuing to live. But now it’s different.
“I wish I had your strength. I don’t think—” My voice cracks, and I’m unable to finish my sentence.
Her eyes close as she fades out. “You’re strong. You just haven’t realized it yet, but you’ll find your strength. I know you will.”
A loud beeping sound coming from Cole’s pocket causes me to jump.
“You’ve got to be kidding me. Now what?” He shoves his hand in his pocket, pulling out a beeper, and squints while trying to decipher the number. The light from the pager illuminates his face like an apparition. “Unbelievable.” He sits up, rubs his bleary eyes, swings his jacket over his back, and glides his arms through the sleeves.
“Where are you going?” My voice shakes as I speak.
“I have to run across the street real fast. Something’s going down and they called for backup. When I leave, put your chair under the door knob like this.” He demonstrates exactly what he wants me to do. “Let me grab an extra one for you to sit on.” Cole brings me a chair and puts it down right next to the window and across from Alyssa.
“Thanks.”
“Yeah, no problem. Don’t open the door for anyone until you hear Zeus bark, all right? Even if it sounds like me, don’t do it. You got that?” He arches his eyebrows in expectation.
“I understand. Please hurry.” I check on Alyssa, feeling the panic rise in my chest, but she remains peaceful. Thankfully, the alarm didn’t disturb her.
“Will do. All of the guards within a mile radius of the call have to respond, so you’re going to be guard-free for a little while.”
“Is that a good or bad thing?”
“Good. I don’t trust most of them when it comes to you. Okay, I gotta go.”
After he leaves I place the chair under the doorknob. I sit down, lean back, and decide to count with the clock. The ticking doesn’t calm my nerves though. It only reminds me of how slow time moves when you want it to go faster.
Within five minutes, I hear a male voice reverberating through the hall. The string of vulgarity that easily slips off his tongue puts me on edge. It sounds unfamiliar, but who knows. My eyes lock on the door, waiting for any motion, as fear pulses within my veins.
One knock.
“Open the door,” the voice demands.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see Alyssa stir and open her eyes. I leap to her bed and fling my hand over her mouth. I whisper, “Don’t say a word.”
“I said open the door! Now!” he yells while pounding his fists against the frame.
Go away, go away, please, please go away and leave us alone.
“All right. I’ll do this my way,” he says, the menace of his words reaching me even through the door.
Alyssa grabs my hands with all of her strength and I realize I’m the only one here to protect her. I shove my fright back into the corner of my brain and answer him.
“If it’s me you’re after, you can have me, just don’t hurt her.”
“HA.” The door bashes in and a man whom I’ve never seen before walks in wearing a hospital gown. The smell of his body odor causes me to scrunch my face. His bloodshot eyes match his red brand, but he doesn’t look at either of us. “I don’t want you.” He points behind me and laughs mockingly at my face. “I want her morphine.”
“No.”
He doesn’t like my answer, not one bit. His face turns scarlet like he’s going to detonate. He smiles sadistically and cracks his neck. “It doesn’t work that way. I get what I want, when I want it. So do yourself and the little girl a favor and move.”
“There isn’t anymore,” I lie. Not convincing enough. I move in front of Alyssa’s bed to block her view of his face.
“I know. I’ve checked all the other patients. She’s the only one. Now move.”
I can’t focus or think straight, so I say something I regret the second it comes out. “Over my dead body.”
He cocks his head and sneers. “Now that’s not a problem.”
He comes toward us, so I grab the chair near the window, turn my head away, and swing it into the glass with everything I have. The jarring crash sends glass flying everywhere, and I release the chair and let it fly out the window. Immediately, the crashing of the chair coupled with the sound of vehicles in the street and people bickering waft into the room.
“Now, that wasn’t necessary, was it?” Then with unexpected speed, he darts forward. I lunge into him to try to block him from getting to Alyssa. He shoves me into the wall, smacking the back of my head, and I crumple to the floor. Darkness fills my vision for a moment, making it hard to focus. He turns his back to me, thinking I’m finished, but I have enough sense to latch onto his legs.
“Stupid girl,” he curses. His fist hammers my back, jolting my shoulders with excruciating pain.
“Stop it!” Alyssa yells. “Don’t hurt her. Take the morphine.” I look up and she has the bag in her hands.
“Drop it!” I yell to Alyssa. Can’t hold on much longer…
His brutish arms wrap around my waist and he pulls me up like a sack of flour, ripping my hands away from his legs. In one motion, he sends me crashing into the side of Alyssa’s bed. The room spins as I attempt to gather myself.
She tosses the bag to me and it lands on the floor. I grab the clamp and slide the ball up leaving the tubing wide open.
“What the hell are you doing? Just give me the damn bag.”
I watch anxiously as Alyssa’s blood starts running down from her hand, creeping closer to the bag. I pick up the bag and lay it on my lap. Hurry, hurry. His eyes register deceit and he punches me in the face. My head whips back, but I manage to hold on to the morphine. I look down just as her blood reaches the bag.
“Clamp it,” I say. I stand up on wobbly legs and hand Alyssa the bag of morphine. Broken but victorious, I say, “You can have it now, but I wouldn’t take any if I were you.”
“A little bit of blood doesn’t scare me. Now hand it over or I’ll put you in a coffin.”
“Well, it should.”
“Oh yeah. Why’s that?”
“Hers is lethal. That entire bag is now contaminated with the virus that’s killing her. So do us all a favor. Take it. Go inject all your drug buddies and take bets on who
will be the last to die.”
“You’re lying!” He grabs me with one hand, lifting me off my toes.
“She wouldn’t be lying here if I was!” I scream at him. I’ve taken a beating and run out of ideas for holding him at bay.
“Then you’re both dead.” He jams his fist straight into my windpipe and I’m unable to scream. At the same time, he releases my shirt and I land flat on my back. He mounts me and wraps his hands around my neck.
“Get off of her!” Alyssa sits ramrod straight in bed, her tiny voice projecting louder than I thought possible. Her wild eyes plead with him.
“You. Shut up,” he says.
I’m struggling to get him off my chest, but I can’t breathe. My throat is in a knot where his fist smashed me. It’s no use. He overpowers me. His grimy smell and devilish eyes make me panic. His dirty fingers close around my windpipe like a vice. If I could just breathe. In a frenzy, I claw at him with my fingernails, but his grip proves unbreakable. My legs flail at nothing but air. My chest feels like it’s going to explode with the need for air. This is it. I hope he makes it quick.
Nothing can brace me for the slow deprivation of oxygen. Images around me blur, and darkness creeps up like shadows, but then something slams into him forcing him off me and onto the ground. He screams for mercy.
“Look away.” Cole’s voice fills my ears.
Alyssa pulls the sheet over her eyes. I roll over, clutching my neck, and gasping for air. Thank God, thank you for air. Out of the corner of my eye, I can see Cole’s eyes squint in anger. The vein in his forehead pulses with fury.
“Hold him there,” Cole says to Zeus. He turns to the man. “Were you going to kill her?”
“No. I just wanted the morphine and the stupid bi—”
Cole punches him in the jaw, making the addict flop like a rag doll. “Don’t you dare call her that.” His hands wrap quickly around the man’s head in a jerking motion and I hear a snap, followed by a thud. Then I see the man’s lifeless face just a few feet from mine. His eyes remain open, and his neck bulges from where Cole broke it.