6 Months Earlier
The wedding
“You look beautiful, Lei,” I said, brushing down her white gown. Tiffany is late, and no one knows where she is, so it’s been my duty to make sure Leila doesn’t flip out and go into a panic. Fuck Tiffany.
“Thanks, Ame.” She turned to face me, her hands grasping mine. “How are you feeling about all this baby stuff?”
I thought over her words and shook my head. “Let’s not make this any more about me than it already has been.” No one had seen Maddox since yesterday, and quite frankly, I was scared.
“No, seriously, Amethyst. You’re my best friend, I care about you. I need to know how you’re feeling. Distract me, at the very least.”
Distraction, okay, I could do that for her. “Well,” I sighed. “A little nervous, a little scared, and…” I looked at her and squeezed her hand softly. “Does it make me a bad person that I wish I never met Travis and that I regret it already?”
She patted her brown hair that’s up in a bun and smiled. “No, babe. It makes you human and twenty-three years old with a whole life and career in front of her.” She squeezed me back. “It’s going to be okay. You have so much support. We’re going to get through this, okay?”
I nodded in agreement, even though it wasn’t going to be okay. Not even in the slightest. Then pulled her dress up to cover her boobs more. “You ready to be married?”
She whacked my hand away. “Yes, and leave the titties out.”
I laughed, giving myself one final glance in the mirror. Leila had the bridesmaid dresses similarly styled to hers, only where she wore white, we wore red. Tight, strapless gowns with a cinched waist. They were classy and over the top, much like her. My hair was down in soft curls and my makeup was light. Everything was classy, yet classic. I would’ve expected nothing less from Leila. The bedroom door swings open and Tiffany comes flying in with an angry looking Liza following behind her. Liza slams the door closed.
“Sorry,” Tiffany said, fixing her hair. “Was a little busy…”
I looked between them both, but Liza didn’t look back at me. She gave a silent look to Leila and then gestured to the door. “Shall we?”
Leila grabbed my hand. I stared back at her. “You okay?”
She searched my face, her eyebrows etched in worry, then she released and smiled. “Yes, I love you, Ame.”
“I love you too.”
I half expected Leila to walk down the aisle to Snoop Dogg, but instead, a soft melody played that I didn’t recognize. It was beautiful and relaxing. I put one foot in front of the other and slowly made my way down the aisle, making an effort not to look at Maddox, who I knew was standing beside his brother. I felt fire shooting toward me from that side, but I drove through it. I could hold my shit together for Leila. This was her day. I’ll raise that baby like it’s my own. I closed my eyes as I reached the altar, then opened them onto the entrance to wait for Leila. I couldn’t do that to him. It was not his issue, he already had his own child to care for. It wouldn’t be fair on him, and it wouldn’t be fair on Ken to have to share her daddy. Not that there’s anything wrong with mixed stepfamilies, but for right now, I couldn’t do it. Not to rule out the future, though. Tiffany was coming down, but she was distracted, seductively hooked on the groom’s side. I followed her line of sight, and I shouldn’t have.
Maddox.
His eyes lazily focused on Tiffany, a crooked grin on his face. His hair was messy, much like Tiffany’s and his tie wasn’t secured around his neck properly. He licked his lip and bit down, his eyes raking up and down Tiffany.
My heart snapped in my chest, my legs physically shaking unsteadily. I closed my eyes as scorching heat flushed through me. Just as my legs were about to give away, Liza was right there beside me, holding me up by my arm.
“It’s okay, Amethyst. Just don’t pay attention.” I search her face, but she was already sneering at both Tiffany and Maddox. If looks could kill…
Leila started walking down the aisle. Her sole focus should have been on her soon-to-be-husband, but they were on me, her eyebrows pulled in again in worry. She could probably sense it. We always were strangely wired together. I needed to pull my shit together for her. Everyone warned me about this. Elliot being the loudest, but I didn’t listen. It didn’t matter how betrayed or hurt I was feeling right now, I couldn’t shit on my best friend’s wedding. I took a deep breath in and out, while counting to ten in my head, then straightened my shoulders.
Fuck. Maddox, and that whore Tiffany.
The reception was much worse. Maddox and Tiffany were all over each other throughout the night. It made me physically sick to watch. Could I blame him, though? It’s not like I didn’t come here with someone of my own. But in saying that, he did get married. My head hurt.
We didn’t stay for long, leaving quite early on in the night. Travis took me back to Mom and Elliot’s quickly so I could say goodbye to Kennedy. We were having hot cocoa in the kitchen with marshmallows when the doorbell rang. The babysitter, a middle-aged woman named Tessa, called out that she would get it.
“Hey, so!” I pinched her cheeks. “I’ve got to go back to LA.”
Kennedy’s face dropped. “Why? But I thought you and Daddy were going to be happily ever after?”
I froze, then quickly collected my wits. “Why would you think that?”
She shrugged, her shoulders sagging. “Because you look at each other in a Disney kind of way.”
“Hey.” I hopped down and kneeled in front of her, trying to ignore the fact that my heart was physically throbbing in my chest. “We’re still family, sweetheart.”
She smiled. “We are, aren’t we?”
I nodded.
“Kennedy! Are you ready, darling?” Tessa said, holding Kennedy’s bags.
“I’ll walk her out.” I took the bags off Tessa and gently caught Kennedy’s hand in mine.
I was still looking at her when we reached the door and I saw Cassidy standing there. She looked slightly different from what I remembered. Her hair was now short, and there were a few bags under her eyes.
“Hi…” I said, mainly to test out her vibe.
She sighed like she was tired, then looked down at Kennedy. “Hi, honey, go and jump into the car. Jessie has your favorite ice cream.”
Kennedy shot off and we both smiled after her, watching as she climbed into the Range Rover.
Cassidy looked back at me. “Listen, whatever is going on with you and Maddox, can you please not let it touch Kennedy. You’re both so toxic together, I will kill both of you if it comes near my daughter—”
I interrupted her. “No, no. Nothing’s happening.” And you don’t know anything about me and Maddox.
She glared at me like she didn’t believe me.
“Seriously,” I whispered, clearing my throat. “I have a boyfriend and whatever was going to happen between Maddox and I—just, will never happen.”
She searched my eyes. “You can say that, Amethyst, but everybody knows that’s not true. You don’t get a say in what happens between you and Maddox. I wish I was that girl for him, but I’m not, and no one ever will be, do you know why?”
I shook my head.
“Because there’s only one you.”
“Lucky me,” I answered sarcastically, leaning on the doorframe. Were we bonding?
She chuckled. “That bad, huh?” Then she started walking back to the car. “We could probably have some drinks one day and a good gossip session.”
I snorted. “Not likely, but thanks.”
“Thank God, but at least I asked.” She winked at me and then they shot off.
AMETHYST
Present
Cassidy and I have become somewhat friends. I know, right, weird. She added me on Facebook, and then started liking my photos and then the next thing I know, we’re tagging each other in memes (and we all know what that means). But it also means that I get to see Kennedy through Cassidy, so I love it. I love the time I get to s
pend with Kennedy, which includes her and I working on my halfpipe. She’s quite the artist, it has been our bonding time. Cassidy has only managed to bring her over twice, but both times they stayed the weekend and we spent all night and day splashing graffiti on the halfpipe. Ken does all sorts of cute drawings. A beaming sun, a pink frog, and curly hearts. So many hearts. But the one that really gets me is the stick family she drew. She says it’s me, her and Maddox and we’re all at the snow together. She even drew a little snowflake beside us, and a cat named Greg. Don’t ask me why she named it Greg, she doesn’t even know, she just said that she liked the name. Can’t argue with that. Cassidy would always be sunbathing by the pool, sucking down cocktails while Kennedy and I were dressed in matching denim coveralls with paint splashed all over them.
The last time they were here, Ken did my hair in pigtail messy knots and we snapped a whole ton of selfies, uploading them to social media. I wasn’t sure whether Maddox knew about Cassidy, mine, and Ken’s friendship, and I didn’t care to ask. I was just happy to still be a part of Kennedy’s life and I’ll forever owe Cass for that. Cass isn’t too bad of a chick, though. She’s a princess, and a bitch, but she’s a great mom and not too bad of a friend. I can always count on her to give it to me straight. When we first started hanging out, there was once that she came out and said she needed to clear something up before we could become friends. I was nervous because it’s Cassie.
She then went on to tell me the gory details of her and Maddox’s divorce. She said that she took too many pills one night and had a bit too much to drink and that everyone assumed she had tried to commit suicide. It was hard to listen to, but it was only a solid ten or so minutes, and then it was done after that and we never had to speak of him or that again. I respected why she wanted and needed to tell me, she wanted to make sure that I knew she wasn’t some crazy ass ex-wife trying to get close to the real love of his life. I interrupted her when she said that.
Leila still isn’t hot on her, but I can see her slowly coming around. Leila is a hard nut to crack, which is why I never understood her friendship with Tiffany—who is no longer a friend. After the wedding drama, Leila kicked her out of her life. I don’t know about Maddox, though.
I answer my phone while unlocking the front door to my house. Today was a long day that started at three a.m. It’s now nine p.m. and I’m beat.
“Hello?”
“Amethyst?”
“Hi, Daddy. Whatcha doing?” Hearing from my dad always puts a smile on my face.
“Good, baby girl. How you doing? Have you been taking it easy? We watch your show every week.”
I toss my keys onto the counter and change ears. “Thanks, Dad. Everything is good, I’m tired, though.”
“Has that boy been leaving you alone?”
I roll my eyes. I made a huge mistake telling my dad that Travis was hassling me when I first broke it off with him. Travis went into a drug and alcohol spiral and the show killed him off. He was that bad. I had to use huge force to stop Dad and my uncle Marcus from physically hurting Maddox every time we went bust, but the shit with Travis and I? That was a whole new ball game. Dad and Uncle Marcus straight up had a plan and a plot of land for Travis’ body. It took me a whole week to calm them both down.
“Yes, Dad. He’s fine now.”
“Good. It’s your birthday soon, anything planned for it?”
“Um.” I pull open the fridge door and take out a bottle of water. “Not yet. I was thinking of just doing something small. It’s hard enough to get everyone on the same phone call let alone in the same town.”
“Okay, baby, well stop being a stranger and come home soon.”
“I will, Daddy.”
Hanging up my phone, I jump into the shower, scrubbing off the day, then slip into my bed. I contemplate turning on Netflix but find myself enjoying the silence. No one yelling cut, no one screaming orders. No flashing cameras or screaming paparazzi. I turn to the side, tucking my hand under the side of my head. The whole wall is glass, looking out over the pool, my halfpipe, and the rest of LA twinkling like an animated backdrop. I know that I should go back and visit Dad. I haven’t been since Maddox was with me. I sigh, flipping onto my back. I’ve fought the urge to ask anyone how Maddox has been. If he’s remarried or had any new kids. Cass is always quiet when it comes to Maddox, and Ken doesn’t talk about him either. Every time I chat with Leila, she doesn’t even go near the Maddox subject.
I exhale, flipping to my back. Fucking insomnia. My phone starts ringing on the table top and I reach for it aimlessly, sliding it unlocked without looking.
“Yes?”
“Ame, you need to come home.”
I sit up at the sound of Talon’s voice. “What? Why?” I shove the covers off me and stand, my heart pounding in my chest.
“Something has happened, and we need you here. Don’t turn on the TV.”
“Who needs me?” I start ripping off my pajamas, putting my phone on speaker and tossing it onto the bed.
I fly into the closet and tear down clothes, throwing them into my suitcase.
“We all do. Get here, and don’t talk to anyone. Don’t turn the TV on, don’t do anything.”
He hangs up and I freeze, staring at the phone on my bed. “Fuck.”
I throw all of my clothes into my bag and once I’m packed, I run out to my car, shoving a baseball cap over my messy long hair. I start to make my way to the airport, the flashing bright lights beaming over the highway. I punch the Bluetooth feature on the steering wheel.
“Call Alesha.”
“Calling Alesha.”
The phone rings a few times before Alesha’s groggy voice comes through. “Hello?”
“Alesha, it’s me, listen can you please book a flight to New York for tonight. The first flight I can get.”
“I’m on it. Is everything ok?”
“I don’t know, I hope so.”
The flight was fast, even though I got no sleep on the way here. A hundred different scenarios went through my head—none good. I’m walking through the arrival lounge with big glasses and a baseball cap pulled over my messy hair when the TV catches my attention.
Travis’s face.
My brows pinch together.
The video murky, aimed at Travis’s bed.
Me spread out, naked with censored bits blurred out.
My walking slows, and someone slams into my back.
He taped us?
I draw in a deep breath, hot flashes coming in and out.
“Wha—what?” I whisper out, the room spinning. My head pounds, and then everything goes black.
I wake up to my head thudding and my eyelids heavy. Pushing up from the couch, I rub my temples together.
“What the fuck happened?” I clear my throat and wipe my eyes. When they come into focus, I’m staring at Leila, Talon, Liza, and Wolf.
I straighten. “Am I in trouble?”
Leila looks to Wolf, and then back at me. “You blacked out.”
“Oh.” My eyebrows cross, then the memories come back. “Oh…” I squeak, my head burying in my hands. “I can’t believe he’d do that to me.”
Talon, who has been silent, launches off the couch, his hand running through his hair. “This isn’t good.”
“Wait.” I straighten my shoulders. “Is that why you called me here?”
Leila stares at me. “No, honey. We called you because Maddox has put Travis in the hospital.”
“What!” I shoot up from the couch, my eyes darting between them all. “What do you mean?”
“I mean,” Talon says, coming toward me and pulling me in for a hug. He’s hard as rock so it’s always a little awkward when he hugs me. “Maddox is in jail right now, but Dad has gone to bail him out.”
“Why? Where? In LA? Why didn’t you just tell me! I would have bailed him out! Why would you send me here!” I’m yelling. My chest is heaving up and down and I swear sweat is dripping down my face.
“I don’t feel well,?
?? I add, my hand coming to my forehead.
Leila jumps up, catching my hand and pulling me into her, away from Talon. “He didn’t want to see you, babe.”
“What?” I ask, wiping the sweat from my head. “Seriously, I don’t—” I lunge forward, running for the bathroom. I’ve only been here a few times, but every time I come here, Leila has done something new to the décor. They ended up buying in New York.
After emptying my stomach into the bowl, I flush the toilet and turn the tap on, splashing warm water over my face. Patting the towel over my cheeks, I put it back and open the bathroom door. Breathe in and out, Amethyst. Why wouldn’t he want to see me? He just beat my ex-boyfriend’s face in for me. What a head-fuck, like usual.
Leila’s on the other side when I open the door, leaning against the wall. “Are you okay?”
“No.” I shut the door behind me. “What’s going on?”
Leila gapes down the long hallway, and then walks closer to me, tugging my arm and pulling me into one of the spare rooms in their condo. She shuts the door, her hands resting on her hips.
“Maddox has lost his shit.” She starts walking back and forth.
“Why!” I yell, my hands going up in the air. “What the fuck is it to him?”
She pauses, turning to face me. It’s the first time I’ve seen Leila sort of angry at me. “Amethyst, you fucking said his name.”
“Wha—” I pause, my mouth shutting. Pure horror rushes through me. “No, no I didn’t…I wouldn’t…” Would I?
She smiles slightly, seemingly enjoying my discomfort. “Yes, you did.”
I flop down onto the bed. “Fuck. Did I?”
Leila bursts out laughing, taking a seat beside me. “Have you not watched?”
“Why the fuck would I watch?” Now it’s my turn to be angry. “Leila, I literally only just found out that there even was a fucking tape!”
“Wait.” Her smile falls, her jaw turning stiff. “He filmed that without your knowledge?”