Working my jaw, I watch as she leans into the guy and he turns to smile down at her. I recognize him. The ex-boyfriend. The asshole who lost her in a bet. Noel or Joel or whatever the fuck his name is.
No way can Jade be serious about that guy.
“Hey.” I turn to find Tristan standing in front of me, clutching what looks like a jug of vodka. Damn, he’s good to me. It’s like he knows exactly what I need. “It’s cheap but better than foamy warm beer, right?” He hands me a cup with a couple of cubes of ice inside and I take it gratefully.
“Pour it.” I hold the cup out and Tristan undoes the cap, then fills the cup almost to the very top. “Thanks man,” I say before I swallow half of it and hold out the cup again.
“You’re gonna get wasted fast on this,” Tristan warns me and I ignore him, waving my cup at him. Frowning, he refills it.
“That’s the plan,” I mutter as I take a couple of more swallows, slowly turning to see if Jade is still standing there.
She is. The guys are gone. She’s with Kelli and the both of them are watching me, their lips curled like I’m a bug buzzing around their heads and they’re dying to kill me. Squash me dead.
Feeling brave with vodka coursing through my veins, I start to approach them, ignoring Tristan as he calls my name, ignoring the girls who giggle and offer up squeaky greetings as I pass by. I hear no one else, see no one else with the exception of Jade.
I stop just in front of her, my gaze dropping to her legs. Good God, they’re long. Why did I never notice this before? I can only imagine having them wrapped around me as I fuck her deep.
You blew that chance asshole.
“What do you want?” she asks snidely. No hi, no what’s up Shep. Not that I deserve anything more.
“You,” I tell her like an idiot. I swallow hard, ignoring the buzzing sound swarming in my head that’s most likely vodka-induced. “I want you, Jade.”
Her eyes flare the slightest bit and then narrow. Like she had a glimmer of hope there for about two seconds before she realized oh that’s right, I’m a total asshole. “You had your chance,” she whispers as she steps closer to me. Was she always this tall? I let my gaze drop to her feet, see that they’re encased in wedge sandals—I know about wedges, don’t forget I have two older, very fashion conscious sisters—that make her impossibly tall.
Impossibly sexy.
“And you ruined it,” she continues, her eyes sparkling and full of anger. I’ve never seen her look prettier.
Well, that’s a lie. I loved seeing her with no makeup, just bare skin covered in freckles.
“Yeah. I did. I’m sure you won’t accept my apology and I totally understand why,” I start, clamping my lips shut when her roommate appears at her side.
“Is this asshole giving you trouble, J?” Kelli sends me a look, one that says she’d like to poke me in the balls with an extra sharp stick.
“No.” She tears her gaze away from mine to smile at Kelli. “He’s harmless.” She looks at me once more, her lips curling in distaste. “Like a rat.”
“Rats are disgusting, dirty creatures,” Kelli says, sneering at me.
I say nothing. I deserve their shitty words, Jade’s hatred. She hates me. She has to. I’d hate me too. I do hate me.
“Sometimes you can keep them as pets,” Jade points out, like maybe she has hope I could change. Does she? God, I wish. “They can be really sweet.”
“Yeah, but they’re all beady eyed with pointy little noses and long, disgusting tails.” Kelli visibly shudders. “They’re awful.”
“Hey.” Noel-Joel reappears on the opposite side of Jade, turning to look at me. His eyes go wide when he recognizes me and I don’t smile. I don’t react at all. This guy can go suck a dick for all I care. “Prescott. What’s up?”
I nod, still not saying a word.
“You remember Joel, don’t you?” Jade asks me sweetly. Too sweetly.
Joel. I knew it was one or the other. Hmm, Joel and Jade. Don’t they make a cute couple? I think I’m going to throw up. “Hey,” I tell him, lifting my chin in greeting.
Jade rolls her eyes as Joel asks politely, “How are you, man?”
He appears uneasy and he should. He’s got his eye on my prize. Hell, I’m fairly certain he brought my prize here tonight and while I’m tempted to thank him for bringing Jade to me, I know she wouldn’t appreciate that.
And I bet he wouldn’t either.
Speaking of bets…
“I’m good. Sort of pissed at your girl here for reneging on her part of our bet,” I say, earning a pissed off glare from Jade.
“Trust me, we’re paid up on that stupid bet,” she mutters, crossing her arms in front of her chest.
Big mistake. I see her cleavage, remember how I’ve had my mouth there, kissing along the tops of her breasts and I break out in a sweat.
“You’re really going to hold her to it?” Joel asks incredulously. “That was all talk, bro.”
“Yeah, well I’m sure if I’d lost and didn’t pay you your fifty grand, I could offer up the it was all talk bro excuse and you’d go for it?” When Joel frowns I continue. “Didn’t think so.”
“Let it go.” Jade steps closer to me, her gaze pleading. She doesn’t look mad anymore. No, she looks…sad. It kills me that I put that look on her face. I hate this. What I’ve done to her, what I’ve done to us. If there ever really was an us. “Please?”
“You owe me fair and square,” I murmur, wishing I could touch her. Having her this close, I can smell her, see the freckles on the bridge of her nose, watch as those perfect, juicy peach colored lips part, as if she’s searching for words and can come up with nothing.
I understand the feeling.
“I owe you nothing,” she whispers fiercely. “Go away.”
I stand my ground. “No.”
An exasperated breath leaves her and she turns to look at Kelli. “This was a mistake,” she tells her.
“Wait a minute,” Joel says, touching Jade’s arm. I see red. He can so casually touch her while I can’t makes me want to rip his fingers off, one by one. “Did you come here with me tonight in the hopes of seeing him?”
Jade sends me a look that reminds me of a death sentence before she turns to face Joel. “Of course not. I came tonight so I could hang out with you.”
“Doesn’t look like it to me. More like you just wanted to see this asshole again.” He waves a hand in my general direction, not bothering to look at me. I take a step back and sip from my cup, enjoying the show.
I only have hopes the evening continues playing out in my favor.
Okay this is backfiring big time and I don’t like it. I wanted to drive Shep crazy with lust, but I certainly didn’t expect him to approach me. And I didn’t expect him to say that he wanted me either. God, that had been all sorts of hot, how serious he sounded, the forlorn look on his stupidly handsome face.
You. I want you, Jade.
I shake the words out of my brain and try to focus on reassuring Joel. I’ve already half lost him though. He looks angry, with a little bit of butt hurt to add for good measure.
“I didn’t know he’d be here,” I tell Joel quietly, taking his arm and guiding him a few steps away so no one can hear us talk. And when I mean no one, I’m referring to Kelli and Shep. They haven’t really budged. Kelli’s scowling at Shep and he’s drinking continuously from the cup he’s holding, like it’s bottomless. “I swear.”
That’s the truth. I’d hope he’d show up and he didn’t disappoint. But I didn’t come with Joel to hurt him. I came here to hurt Shep. And maybe I did, maybe I am hurting him, but I’m also taking Joel down along with him.
And that’s not cool.
“Do you like me, Jade?” Joel asks, his voice low, his expression earnest.
I sigh, unsure how to answer. “I do. But just as a friend, Joel. I already told you this. I don’t—it’s not going to work between us anymore. I don’t want to lead you on,” I explain, biting my lower lip. I f
eel like a jerk. I knew he wanted more and I came to this party with him anyway. All in the hopes of seeing Shep and making him jealous.
I’m awful. I deserve Joel’s anger.
Joel studies me for a long, quiet moment, his jaw tight, his gaze narrowing. Then he does something so unexpected, so un-Joel-like, I have no choice but to take it for a few brief, mind-numbing seconds.
He’s kissing me. Like he’s trying to push my lips off my face, kissing me so hard and so ferociously I have to shove at his chest to get him to stop.
Joel springs away from me, his expression hard, his lips damp. “You’d rather have him than me,” he says accusingly, though he’s not asking, he’s stating it as fact. There’s no use denying my feelings. Though I’m not going to give them all up. Shep doesn’t deserve them.
“I don’t want either of you.” Lifting my chin, I try my best for haughty, aloof ice queen and I think it’s working. At least Joel is falling for it. But then I catch sight of Shep, see the way he’s studying me with a mixture of disgust and arousal, his mouth grim, his jaw tight. He’s angry, most likely because Joel kissed me, but it couldn’t be helped.
In fact, I’m glad he saw that. Maybe he’ll realize that I am desirable, that I can find someone else. I don’t need Shep.
I don’t need any stupid guy.
Without another word I leave them all where they stand, pissed at Kelli for not trying to get me out of there sooner. Pissed at Joel for calling me out on my crap. Pissed the most at Shep for saying such sweet, sexy things and looking so damn good and sad and wonderful and sexy that I want to both punch him and kiss him, though I haven’t decided yet what I’d do first.
Most likely kiss him. I miss those stupid lips of his. I could get around to punching him later.
I shove through the crowds of people, angry that I left my cup of beer back at the stupid table next to where Kelli’s standing and I glance in the direction of the open kitchen, see that it’s incredibly packed with a ping pong table set up in the middle of the room, a bunch of people surrounding it playing beer pong.
Whatever. I’m so glad everyone can have a great time while my world is crumbling around me, thank you very much. I hate boys. They’re the worst. Either they make you feel like an incompetent loser, or they ignore you like you don’t even exist. Or even worse, for whatever reason you suddenly come back into existence in their pitiful little worlds and now they won’t leave you alone.
This is my life in a nutshell.
“Jade.”
I don’t bother turning around, though my stomach dips when I realize that it’s Shep calling me. “Leave me alone,” I toss over my shoulder, never slowing my pace. I should walk right out of this house and let the night swallow me up. Not like I’d do anything exciting. More like I’d stumble back to my dorm room on these stupid wedge heels, praying Shep wakes up with a massive headache and a case of herpes because he let some other dumb girl fuck him into oblivion.
God, my thoughts are so bitter, it’s pitiful.
“Jade, stop.”
I continue to ignore him, coming to a stop when I see a giant group of guys standing in front of the door leading out to the massive wrap around porch. A few of them pick up a smaller guy who’s wearing the fraternity T-shirt, holding him upside down as he struggles and begs them to put him down.
Yeah, I’m not getting past that crowd anytime soon. Deciding to deviate from my plan, I turn a sharp right and head up the stairs, hoping like crazy I can hide out for a bit until Shep disappears. He won’t be persistent. I don’t think he has a persistent bone in his body and how am I going to make him change?
I’m not. I need to face that.
The stairs seem incredibly steep and I’m practically out of breath when I reach the top, glancing around before I start down the hall. I throw open the first door on the left to find a guy and a girl writhing on the bed half naked. They’re so into each other, they don’t even notice me.
I don’t bother saying sorry as I quickly close the door.
It’s like this in practically every room I peer into. If they’re not having sex, they’re passing a joint and in one room, I found one of the Ems—I’m not sure which one—and I wave at her as she smiles and taps the side of her nose, the guy with her holding a mirror in front of her covered with tiny white lines.
Looks like someone is about to get a bump.
I still can’t believe I’d almost done one myself. I’m not one to cave in to peer pressure but I’d been so drunk, feeling so unsure…I can’t explain it. Since the moment I met Shep, I can’t explain my behavior.
The man makes me crazy. Makes me do crazy things. Makes me want even crazier things.
Giving up, I find an empty bathroom and shut the door, turning the lock and going to the sink, where I wash my hands, then splash cool water on my cheeks. It doesn’t help. I’m still flushed, most likely from anger, but also from…arousal. I’d actually enjoyed that little encounter with Shep. Everything between us is always heightened. The colors brighter, the sounds louder, our words intense, the way I want him…overwhelming. Whenever we snip at each other, it usually turns me on.
What this says about me I’m not sure but I’m not going to question it at the moment.
The door handle turns this way and that, the actual door starting to move and I call out, “Occupied, give me a minute,” as I grab a towel and start drying my hands.
But the jerk on the other side of the door is persistent. The handle rattles again, harder this time and then the door swings open, leaving me standing there with my mouth hanging open, so thankful I wasn’t sitting on the toilet when this particular moment happened.
Especially when I see who’s standing in the doorway.
Shep.
I gape at him, pissed that he’d invade my privacy so easily, secretly thrilled that he was so dogged in his pursuit of…me.
“What are you doing?” I ask, my voice shrill, my emotions going haywire. On one side I’m pissed that he had the nerve to just bust in on me like this. On the other side, I’m thrilled he’s proven persistent after all.
Typically confused. That’s normal when it comes to my feelings for Shep.
“Looking for you,” he says simply as he strides into the bathroom and turns to lock the door, and then the deadbolt above it. “The lock in the handle doesn’t really work,” he explains as he turns to face me.
“Yeah, just realized that.” He would know this, considering it’s his frat house and all. How could I be so stupid, thinking I could escape him? He’s everywhere. “I don’t want to talk to you. And I definitely don’t want you locking us in here together.”
“We have to talk.” He leans against the door, looking freaking amazing. God, I hate him. It’s like he didn’t even try and he looks like pure sex. Wearing a charcoal colored T-shirt that stretches across his broad shoulders and chest, accompanied by dark rinse jeans that mold to his thighs, reminding me exactly how strong and thick they are.
Not that I need to remember. The sensation of his hairy thigh is forever imprinted on my palm, thank you very much.
“There’s nothing to talk about. Trust me, it’s over.” I back up a step, my knee nudging against the toilet seat and I step away, grossed out by the thought of all the male butts that have sat on that thing. “Go away.”
“I’m not some trained pet you can send away at your every command, Jade.” He takes a step closer, like he knows he has me cornered and knowing his asshole tendencies of late, I bet he does know this. Has he kept tabs on me? God, I hope not. I’m infinitely boring, especially by Shep standards.
I take another step back, glancing over my shoulder to see the hideous floral printed shower curtain directly behind me. If I don’t watch it I’m falling ass backward into the tub and wouldn’t that be a sight?
Not that I care any longer what this man thinks of me.
“I wish you were so I could get rid of you once and for all,” I retort. “Stop chasing after me, Shep. There’s no
use.”
His eyes light up and I wonder if it was my use of the word Shep. I rarely say his name and I know he realizes it. “I’m sorry.” He’s approaching, slowly but surely and I have nowhere else to go. Nowhere to escape. He’s got me well and truly cornered. “For what I did to you. I was a total dick.”
An apology. Again, not what I was expecting. “Do you even realize what you did?”
He nods solemnly, looking downright contrite. “I shouldn’t have run.”
Ah, so he considers it running. I figured he’d found another girl and that was the end of Shep and Jade. “So you ran away from me?” After I gave you a blowjob? I want to say exactly that but I’m too embarrassed. I’ll be humiliated if he hated it.
And he must’ve hated it if it made him run.
“Yeah.” He nods, lifts up his hand to run it across his cheek. I don’t think he’s shaved and it’s like I can feel the rasp of his whiskers. As if I’m the one who’s touching him. “It’s what I do. Run. I’m real good at it. Should’ve been on the cross country team when I was in high school. Or track. Yeah, definitely track. I would’ve kicked ass at both of them but I was too busy lighting up bombs and trying to burn down the chem lab.”
I frown. He’s not making any sense. And he has that ever-present red cup in his hand. “Hand it over,” I tell him, wagging my fingers at him, indicating I want to see it. He offers it to me and I lift the glass to my nose, sniffing at the contents.
Nothing.
Though aren’t some liquors hard to smell? As in they’re odorless. I’ve heard that about vodka…is that what’s in Shep’s cup? I wouldn’t put it past him.
“Are you drunk?” I hand him back his cup, thankful that he moves away from me. Even though it’s only by a few inches, it’s still enough to make me feel like I can breathe again.
He smiles and the sight is fucking dazzling. He has the best smile ever. I’m breathless all over again just looking at him. “That’s my goal.”
Ugh. Men are pathetic. “I think you’re close.” I sigh. “Just tell me what you’re drinking.” Why I care I don’t know. He should be drinking cheap beer like everyone else but nooo. He’s Shepard Prescott, special snowflake.