“If you’re hiding anything about Liv or know anything I should know about, and you knowingly withhold this information from me, you’ll suffer just as much as she will. Tell me and I’ll be merciful on you both. Understood?” he snapped while digging his fingers into my flesh. I tugged to no avail, trapped under his unrelenting grip. Grimacing, I wanted to grab a pen off the desk and stab him with it, but I stilled, knowing fighting would get me nowhere in this place, surrounded by his posse, if I hurt him.
I lifted my eyes and met his dark ones, feeling the wrath he could very well impose upon us all rippling beneath the surface, diminishing my will to fight. But I had to fight, not just for me, but for Liv and Saul. To save us all.
“I understand.”
The moment my answer left my lips, he abruptly let go and turned away, looking even more flustered toward the wall as his hand rubbed the stubble growing on his sharp jaw. There was a shaken fury boiling in him, and I feared the worst as I rubbed away the vile pain his fingers had inflicted on my arm.
“Very well, you can go now.” He dismissed me with a careless wave, like ordering away an underling while smoothing out his shirt and sleeves. “Send Liv in. I want to speak with her briefly before you guys get to work today. There’s still so much to do from what Random tells me.”
I jumped from the chair, taking one last hurried glance at Jonas before yanking the door open, never relieved to leave a room as much as that very moment. Still, I managed to catch the door and close it slowly behind me before it slammed shut and possibly angered him more. I was panting from holding my breath and praying my heart wouldn’t jump from my chest. Jonas looked like he was going to either pounce on someone like a panther to sink a pair of unforgiving canines into their flesh, or break down screaming. I didn’t want to be there for either event, and it was better to warn Liv of his mood than to risk her unnerving Jonas even more. He was too dangerous to be petty with, too temperamental to push too far.
I never wanted to push him that far. Who knew what he was capable of with all the power of the Cartel behind him? I stumbled forward past his guards as they gave me an even colder stare down. It sobered me up and got my feet moving as I made my way out of there.
I walked briskly down the hall, a few of the workers peering out of their offices to watch me pass. They all worked for someone named Jorge, who reported to Jonas. I don’t know how this business is run, but Jonas didn’t directly own it; he just backed it financially for his cousin Jorge Rodriquez. I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting Jorge yet.
I banged open the door to the studio where all heads turned toward me. “Liv,” I hollered. “Jonas wants to speak to you in the conference room number one.” I watched her grit her teeth as she stood up and headed toward the door without protesting. Before she could leave, I grabbed her arm and gave it a firm squeeze.
“He’s not in a good mood. Be careful,” I whispered low enough for her ears only, accompanying it with a look she knew meant to tread with caution. She met my eyes, scanning them knowingly before she nodded slightly, and I let go. She disappeared behind the door without a word.
At least being sisters had its advantages. Our practiced looks honed over years of conning and swindling our way through life paid off in moments where words needed to be as few as possible.
I hoped she took my warning to heart. Saul and Random were already working on one of the tracks without so much as glancing our way. I slipped down onto the seat Liz had vacated, feeling her warmth radiating from the cushions. Peeking down to my arm to find the blooming bruises in the shape of fingers already angrily forming across my skin, I cursed, hoping Jonas wouldn’t explode on Liv if he’d found out about Emilio. I hoped he’d never find out.
So many things to wish for.
Chapter Four
Liv
“You wanted to see me?” I peered past the crack of the door to the conference room where Jonas awaited. With Audrey’s warning in the back of my mind, I proceeded slowly past his body guards outside the room and did the same as I entered once he waved me in. He looked pristine, as he usually did—clean pressed white suit, shoes shined enough to see your face in the sheen, manicured nails and no hair out of place, despite the small amount of stubble on his face and dark circles under his eyes. He could definitely pass for a Cartel boss, a malicious and cold one.
“Please, have a seat.” He motioned toward the chair across from him, and I slipped down into it, trying to keep my eyes focused on Jonas. His dark brown eyes studied me hard, digging into my soul, burning, yet oddly undressing me at the same time. I was used to his hungry gaze. I’d seen it many times already. He’d touched me so many times, caressed my skin and ran his hands across every crevice of my body, sent zinging pleasure to my very core. Yet, even so, he was more a stranger to me than a person lost in the audiences we performed to almost every weekend.
It was this abyss between us that kept things awkward for me. I wondered sometimes if I could’ve loved him if not for Emilio. Jonas was debonair, full of manners and prestige. He could make anyone feel like a lady or debutante. Though I preferred to wear my rock and roll garb of tight jeans or leather pants, cropped tops or fitted vests with scarves galore along with dozens of bangles, long earrings and studs strewn through my ears with layers of makeup on my face, he preferred I tone it down and wear more dresses with him or conservative suits when I was around his business partners at parties or meetings.
He was fierce under that pristine exterior.
It wouldn’t be so bad, but I knew what truly laid behind those hungry eyes—those shiny irises that looked unnatural in the artificial light of the conference room. The slight sheen seemed to reflect my very soul and showed me what I feared the most. Jonas had to know something of Emilio and me by now. But how much? We’d been careless, thinking Jonas had stopped looking for any kind of breech between him and I, a divide to keep me from him. It could be that it was involving Emilio, his younger brother, that caused him to pull the wool over his eyes more than if it’d been some other person with me. Regardless, I was full of fear and struggled to keep from shivering.
“What’s going on? We’re in the middle of arranging the songs on the album. We’re just about to make the final…” I started.
“I want to know something,” Jonas interrupted.
I closed my mouth, which was still hanging open from speaking. “What do you want to know?”
Here it comes…
“I don’t miss much. I let things slide when I want to. Nothing happens around me without my permission. But…there’s only so much I will tolerate.”
I cleared my throat, trying my best to look nonchalant.
“That’s reasonable.”
“Emilio!” Jonas called out behind him. From a door that led to another room, Emilio entered the room and came to stand next to Jonas, looking straight ahead, a rigid expression pasted on his unmoving face. I guess it wouldn’t seem out of the norm to see him with Jonas. Now, though, there was a body guard who followed closely behind him, in case he didn’t follow through with coming to see Jonas. This was highly suspicious.
“Yes, brother?”
Jonas chuckled, getting to his feet to give Emilio a warm embrace, though it was all for show. I could tell, seeing that his body wasn’t into it and how Emilio didn’t move away or toward him, but let him embrace his body, bringing his arms up around his brother in a subtle response.
“Ah, Emilio. My little brother. My most loyal of friends.” I gulped as I watched the interaction between them. Jonas patted his brother on the back before he sat down and offered him a chair that the same body guard had just brought into the room. It never escaped my notice that he didn’t place the chair next to me to face Jonas, but next to him instead.
My heart was jumping in my chest, and I tried my best to keep my breaths even and calm, even though every alarm in my head was going off like a six alarm fire station.
“Emilio, my brother,” he repeated, as though he was trying t
o assure himself that it was true. “Tell me, Hermano, has keeping the Westing sisters safe been hard on you?”
Why was he doing this in front of me? I narrowed my eyes, wondering what he was getting at. Praying…praying hard it wasn’t going to go the way I thought it would.
“They can be a handful at times, especially this one.” Emilio nonchalantly waved a languid hand toward me, as though I was just a small nuisance to take care of. “But it’s really not a problem. We keep everyone in line and as safe as possible. The shows can be somewhat chaotic if not disorganized.”
“I see.” Jonas rubbed his chin, thinking on Emilio’s words. I wondered why they never went over the aspects of the work he had Emilio doing; protecting my sister and me at the shows and escorting us around the state. He was going to expand on his security detail once we went on tour in the coming weeks across the country, so…What the hell was going on here?
“Is there something else you need from me?” Emilio let his voice slip out haughty and gruff, but noticed his slip, clearing his throat to cover it up.
“Yes, actually.” Jonas slammed his hand on the desk, making everyone in the room flinch. “I have more important matters for you to attend to in Mexico. You no longer will be assigned to the sisters. Here…” He handed an envelope to Emilio and gave him a curt nod as dismissal.
“What?” I blurted out. “But Emilio heads up all the security. Starting over is going to be a mess with whomever you choose…”
Another slam of his fist on the table shut me up, my words jamming in my throat.
“That is not of your concern, is it, Liv?” He leaned forward, his lips pressed so tightly they paled before my eyes. Even his accent thickened as he continued. “Your job is to sing and be the pretty face, isn’t it?”
“You forgot being your girlfriend,” I muttered. The moment I said the words, I regretted them. Jonas’ face deepened into a deep maroon as his eyes burned, and his rage was beginning to wear on the lines across his face.
“Emilio will no longer be near you or Audrey. He has more important things to spend his time on than a little rock and roll band security detail. I won’t waste his resourcefulness on trifle minute things,” he spat, shaking as he attempted to regain control of his temper. Turning to Emilio, he tossed the envelope toward him. “Get it done. I don’t want to see your face here in Los Angeles for a good long time. There’re things that need to be done besides having fun.”
No…no…no. Jonas was sending Emilio away? How dared he? He knew something about us…that was the only explanation. Why else would he do this?
“But why?” I just couldn’t help myself, could I? My hands shook as I wrung them together in my lap, hoping to keep myself from falling apart at this sickening news.
Jonas didn’t turn back toward me. Instead, he stared at Emilio, his eyes darkening with a violent fury, threatening to spill over, daring him to refuse.
“You have your orders. You may go now, brother…”
They stared at each other for a good long minute, both challenging the other to make the first move. The world was going to implode around me, and there was nothing I could do to make it stop.
Emilio threw me one tiny glance, not risking showing anything in those beautiful, tan brown eyes of his. He bowed his head to Jonas, letting his gaze drop to the floor, away from me, in submission. How it ached to feel his eyes leave mine, like someone had stolen the warmth from the air surrounding this tiny bubble of a life I barely managed to live. I’d lost so much along the way and knew very well how it felt when things were going to be lost again. It was a freight train heading my way, and I was stuck on the tracks, unable to move to save my own life. I wanted to let go of the chair arms, but only managed to grip onto them even harder, as though I were holding on to them for dear life.
“Of course. I always do as you ask. We’re brothers. Are we not?” With that, he turned away and walked around the desk. He came to a stop next to me, avoiding looking my way as he spoke with a cool, steady tone. “It was a pleasure serving you and your sister, Miss Westing. May your music bring you and Jonas much fortune and happiness…”
Like a slap in the face, he swiftly left the room and marched down the hall. The sound of the door swinging shut behind him felt like a needle piercing my heart, and I found myself staring at the closed door, inhaling slowly in and out, now gripping the chair like it could transport me anywhere else but here. Better yet, I wanted to run after Emilio, grab his hand, and run away together from this oppressive environment which was suffocating us both.
But that wasn’t an option, was it? I remained glued to my chair, knowing every step I took, every emotion that crossed my face, every action I made would not only affect my entire world, but also Audrey’s, Saul’s, and especially…Emilio’s. My world had just walked out the door without me, without a clue to where he’d be headed, or when I’d see him again, if ever. My heart was being ripped out as I tried my hardest to focus my head back into the room where Jonas was speaking to me again.
“Emilio’s team will remain under instructions of his second in command, Lonzo, so nothing will drastically change, really. It’ll be like Emilio is still there, so there really isn’t anything to worry about, Bonita.” Jonas’ cold smile made me sick to my stomach, and I was probably turning an unsightly shade of green as he kept on about other stuff that didn’t have anything to do with Emilio anymore. Why did he want to erase Emilio from his life so? From mine? I knew why, but I thought he’d be better than that. To send his own brother away, good as banished, confused me. I’d never do anything to keep my sister away. Never.
In this lies the greatest difference between them and us.
Chapter Five
Four Months Later….
Audrey
“Thank you for having us! Goodnight Chicago!” Gripping Liv and Saul’s hands as we thanked the crowd, the roar echoed in my ears as we stared across the expanse of the stadium, filled with bobbing heads, flashes from camera phones, and the endless blinding lights dancing above us and into our faces, making the crowd disappear into it. I loved it. There was nothing like the end of the show when people called out our names and screamed for more.
Encore! Encore! Encore!
Even Liv thrived on it. It became our drug, our nightly hit of pure adrenaline with a shot of star power. The arenas were filling up, selling out, and each venue got bigger and bigger. Our station wagon was left behind in storage as we toured the country in a tripped out tour bus that contained every little necessary accommodation a person could need…could want…and more. The moment we’d stepped inside it the first week of our stateside tour, we were enamored to say the least.
“Is this for real?” Liv and I eyed each other before diving into the tour bus and examining every gadget, nook, button and hideaway it offered. It’d been a glorious day, beyond belief, more than either of us had ever imagined we’d have.
“It’s as real as it fucking gets!” I couldn’t contain myself at that moment. These echoes of our laughter…our happiness…kept me alive in the moments of doubt, the moments which woke me up in the middle of the night and choked me up before getting on stage. Liv never showed anything of nervousness, beyond her drinking. She was always so poised, solid and secure. Relaxed and loose. I wanted to be that way, unmoving in the face of a tidal wave called fame. Where Liv fed off the energy of the crowd and came alive, even though I did the same sometimes, it was the after burn… the moments when the energy ebbed away without the crowd where my insides turned cold again.
Luckily, Saul would snap me out of it almost immediately. It wasn’t that I didn’t appreciate what I had, but everything felt fragile, aching to fall apart and disintegrate. I wasn’t usually a pessimist, but something was coming to wreck it all. I didn’t know when or what would cause it, especially since the main reason of my uneasiness, Emilio, was gone. We were still working for Jonas, still his pawns, his pariahs. How could we ever truly be free if this tied us all together, forever?
> “Hey, you okay, Audrey?” Saul slipped his hands over my shoulders as we settled into the green room. His fingers kneaded at my shoulders and neck, forcing me to relax as I released the tension, letting it flow out with a long exhale. I had to make a conscious effort to do this, or I’d remain wound up tight and hard, ready to shatter like a plate glass window with the right blow.
“Yeah, I’m alright. You?” I leaned forward, my signal for him to stop. Saul never missed a beat. He headed over to the water cooler, filling two cups before returning and taking Liv’s chair next to mine.
“Never better. You know me… nothing much fazes me.” His wide toothy grin broke through my force field, and I let his contagious attitude dilute mine.
“I’m glad nothing does. Someone has to remain grounded here.”
Liv swayed into the dressing room, shirtless but with her black bra still on. Never had I ever been relieved to know Saul couldn’t see her like this. She was already shitfaced, having most definitely finished off a bottle of something, and then some, while in the restroom. The thick smell of alcohol followed in her wake.
“How’s it going, Sis?” I mumbled, feeling the released tension itching to return in a millisecond.
Liv was humming to herself, and it dug under my skin for some odd reason. I wished I could just forget a lot of things and let her bury herself if she chose to do so. So done.
“Liv?” I questioned her again.
“Hmm?” Liv leaned toward me, her glassy eyes shiny under the lights of the vanity mirror’s illumination.
“Did you even hear me?” I downed the cup of water, surprised to find I wanted more. Performing drained every drop of fluid out of me, and I never drank enough water to keep the thirst at bay.
“Going to go hang out with some friends tonight.” She sashayed toward the door, trying to look sober, but I caught the tiniest of trips as she grabbed for the knob, saving herself from upturning onto the floor in a belly flop. “See?” She opened the door and waved to a group of young men—fans patiently waiting on the other side with security.