She inched open the lid. Inside were a journal and a daguerreotype. Lucy picked up the photo. It was of a young woman holding a baby. She had a look about her that reminded her of Nate. Lucy was looking at Nate’s mother. She was lovely, with a cloud of thick, dark hair and Nate’s stubborn mouth and expressive eyes.
A lump in her throat, Lucy dropped the picture back into the box and picked up the journal. It looked old, too old to be Nate’s personal journal. The battered leather cover felt loved and worn in her hand, and the pages smelled old and stale.
She opened the first page. Mary Elizabeth Stanton. His mother’s journal. Tears stung Lucy’s eyes. Poor motherless boy. This was all he had of his mother, all the experience he had of women as well, just some brief memories of a long-dead mother. No wonder his father was determined to find him a wife.
She read several pages. Mary had a gentle heart, and it appeared Henry had ruled the house tightly. There was a mention of his anger when she’d burned chicken one night. On another page Mary said he’d sold her favorite horse to pay for a new bull. She’d grieved that he’d done it without asking her. But in spite of having an autocratic husband, Mary had sprinkled her journal with bits of poetry, verses of Scripture, and hints of her sweet spirit.
Lucy wished she could have known the woman. Had Nate ever read this and seen his father through Mary’s eyes? Roger’s warning had begun to make a little more sense. Lucy would have to find the line between respect and keeping up necessary boundaries. It wouldn’t be easy without talking to Nate about it.
She put the journal back into the box. She shouldn’t have read it, not without Nate’s permission and knowledge. It was too private, almost sacred. Her anger mostly evaporated, she finished making the bed, then dropped the freshly folded clothes into a box that served as Nate’s chest.
She had just finished putting the clothes away when she heard a horse neigh in the yard. Compressing her lips, she glanced out the window. Jed was still mounted, but Nate jumped to the ground and was opening the barn door.
Lucy lifted the watch that hung around her neck. The watch had belonged to her mama and offered her some comfort as she checked the time. Four o’clock, almost time for supper, and the uneaten dinner sat congealing on the stove. Her anger raged again, and she went down to meet them.
NATE WAS BONE weary, and his stomach was gnawing on his backbone. Jed had made several pointed comments about dinner around one o’clock, but Nate had ignored him. The lad needed to grow up and realize that a man didn’t go running home when his belly got a little empty. He didn’t go home until the work was done, and there hadn’t been a good time to take a break, even though he’d told Lucy they would be home for lunch.
“Help me curry the horses, and we’ll see if Lucy can rustle us up some grub.”
The boy’s shoulders drooped, and Nate almost relented, then remembered he was supposed to be teaching Jed how to be a man. He was responsible for Jed now. He shoved open the sliding door to the barn and led his horse inside. They quickly curried the horses and turned them out into the stable. Nate tossed a pitchfork full of hay over the fence, then clapped Jed on the back.
“You did a man’s work today, Jed. I was mighty proud of you.”
Jed’s chest swelled, and if his grin were any bigger, it would have split his face. “Thank you, sir.”
“You as hungry as I am?”
Jed nodded. “Lucy is probably wondering where we are.”
“She knew we were working.” Nate started toward the house. “I’m sure she figured out we were busy when we didn’t make it back.”
A strange aroma wafted toward him when he opened the door. It smelled like something charred and a bit like glue. Whatever it was, it didn’t smell appetizing. Still, Nate would put a good face on it and force it down. He was hungry enough to eat whatever she threw at him.
He forced a smile. “Smells like something’s cooking.”
Lucy stood and put her fists on her hips. “Something was cooking. Now something is burned. But help yourself.” She made a sweeping gesture toward the cookstove. “If you dare.” Her eyebrows lifted in challenge.
Nate looked at Jed, and Jed looked at Nate. Nate knew he wore the same expression the boy did. A look of panic and dismay. He sidled over to the stove and glanced in the pan. It might have been chicken and noodles once, but now it more resembled a sticky gob of glue.
“Uh, looks good,” he said lamely. Lucy almost visibly swelled, and he was reminded of an outraged mother hen.
“It was good around one o’clock. Even at two it was still edible. Now it looks—it looks like porridge!” Lucy stalked toward the fireplace and sat beside Eileen. Even Lucy’s back and neck looked outraged.
Nate scratched his head. The boy’s eyes were round and pleading as he stared from the mess on the stove to Nate.
“Do we have to eat it?” he whispered.
“I heard that, and the answer is yes.” Lucy jumped to her feet again. “Maybe it will help you remember to come home in time to eat tomorrow.”
Nate frowned. This was not going the way he had pictured the evening. He’d planned to eat a hot, home-cooked meal, then take the buggy over to the main house and check on Pa.
“I see I need to explain the way a ranch works.”
“No, I need to explain the way a cook works,” Lucy said. “When food is ready to be eaten, the men come and eat it. Jed is a growing boy. He needs to eat three square meals a day. Look at him, Nate. He’s skinny as a pitchfork and needs fattening. Providing for my family is one reason I agreed to marry you. And you need to eat three meals a day yourself. If you can’t be bothered to come home for dinner, then you need to tell me, and I’ll pack you a lunch or bring it to you.”
She was right. His heart clenched at the boy’s thinness. He looked back at Lucy. Her cheeks were rosy and her blue eyes sparkled. He grinned. “A bit riled, aren’t you? You sure look pretty that way. Maybe we’ll have to try this again tomorrow, Jed.”
Her brother grinned, though his eyes were still anxious. He’d obviously been made to toe the line by his sister before.
For a moment the color in Lucy’s cheeks deepened. Then the corner of her mouth lifted and her dimple appeared. “Don’t think fake compliments will make me forgive you.” Though her tone was severe, her eyes smiled.
He held up his hands and turned to the boy. “She has me, Jed. I should have realized you would need to be fed. But we’ll take our punishment like men, what do you say?”
Jed gave a doubtful glare at the mess in the pan. “Do we have to?”
“Are you a man or a rabbit? Come on, this will taste better than it looks.” He grabbed the ladle and tried to scoop some out of the pan. It stuck to the spoon and refused to drop to the plate.
“I think I’ll be a rabbit today,” Jed said.
Lucy sighed. “Since you’re truly contrite, I’ll see if I can find something edible for you.”
Nate shook the spoon again. The glob clung steadfastly to the spoon. He dropped it back into the pan with a sigh of relief. “Jed and I will rise up and call you blessed, won’t we?”
“If I don’t have to eat that slop, I’ll even tell everyone she’s the prettiest woman in Indiana,” Jed said.
“Indiana, my foot! She’s the prettiest woman in the Red River Valley—in Texas even.” Nate caught Lucy by the waist as she sashayed past him. She smelled good, kind of like fresh-baked bread. “Do you forgive us?”
“I forgive Jed. I haven’t decided about you yet.” Her lashes lowered to her cheeks, then she raised them, and he was dazzled by the light in her eyes.
He wished the kids weren’t here. How was he supposed to woo his wife with a constant audience? It would be a challenge, but for the first time Nate realized he intended to do just that. Almost against his will, his hands tightened around her waist, and he pulled her against his chest and rested his chin on her head.
“You’re staying right here until you tell me I’m forgiven,” he said softly.
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She struggled to get free for a moment, but then her arms circled his waist, and she stood content in his arms. “I’m not complaining,” she said too softly for the kids to hear. She pulled away. “I need to tell you something.”
He studied her troubled eyes. “What’s wrong?”
“I saw your mother’s journal in your room. I must confess I read a few pages. She was a lovely woman, Nate.”
His throat tightened. “You can read it all you like, Lucy. I’d like to think my mother is looking down and is happy I have a good wife.”
Her eyes filled with tears and she nestled her face against his chest.
His heart soared. She must find him attractive. Maybe even as attractive as he found her. The Bible admonished him to love his wife. He was beginning to realize that might not be too difficult.
TWENTY-ONE
The days sped by in a blur of busyness. Lucy had so much to learn she felt her head must surely explode with the knowledge she stuffed in. She and Nate were still wary around one another, but they were slowly learning about each other. They had begun evening devotions with the children, and he’d given her his mother’s journal to read.
Spring had finally come to Texas. Wildflowers brought welcome bits of color to the landscape, and the air was filled with the fragrance of new life. Lucy carted her washtub outside and scrubbed the clothes while Eileen occupied herself “planting” her own small garden, though the seeds were way too deep. Lucy would have to fix it when Eileen wasn’t looking.
Lucy rubbed at a spot on Nate’s dungarees. Her hands were red and chapped, but who would have thought she would find such satisfaction in caring for a man and his belongings? Nate’s prediction about the softness of her hands had proven true, but Lucy didn’t mind. Her rough hands were proof of the effort she was putting into this marriage.
She hung the clothes on the line Nate had put up for her and went to the house to start dinner. Nate had told her he would be in the south pasture all day and had asked her to bring the meal to him. Since that one missed meal, he had been conscientious about keeping her informed of his mealtime activities. She allowed herself a small grin at the tiny victory.
“Eileen, it’s time to come in.”
Lucy went inside and took the bread from the bread box. She cut thick slices and made egg sandwiches, then wrapped them in cloth and put them in a box. She added cheese and the pie she’d made earlier in the day.
She cocked her head and listened. Eileen still hadn’t answered her. She went to the back door. “Eileen, come in now!” There was still no answer, so Lucy stepped outside. She sighed when she saw no sign of her sister. Eileen was probably in the barn petting the calf.
Lucy hurried across the yard to the barn. They would have to hurry, or Nate would accuse her of ignoring his mealtime. She shoved open the door and stepped into the dimly lit barn. A shaft of sunlight illuminated the dust motes, and the straw made her sneeze.
“Eileen?”
The only answer she got was the snort of the horse in the far stall and the rustle as the calf shuffled in the hay. Beginning to be alarmed, Lucy turned and ran back to the front yard. “Eileen! Where are you?” She raced around the house several times before she could admit the obvious to herself.
Eileen was nowhere to be found.
Her heart was racing like a runaway train, and her mouth was dry with panic. Shading her eyes, she stared out at the horizon. Where could Eileen be? Lucy was torn between wandering out to find Eileen herself and going for help. Her heart screamed for her to find her sister now, but wisdom dictated finding Nate. He knew the area.
She threw the sidesaddle on Wanda and clambered atop the mare’s broad back. Digging her heels into Wanda’s sides, she clung desperately to the pommel as the horse broke into a canter. Within minutes she was in sight of the herd of longhorn and could make out Nate’s familiar broad shoulders.
At the sight of her husband, tears sprang from her eyes and she began to sob. “Nate!” she screamed. The sound that came out of her mouth was closer to a croak.
Nate’s head came up, and he kicked his horse into a run, with Jed right behind him. “What is it? What’s wrong?” His gaze darted past her. “Where’s Eileen?”
“She’s gone! I was doing laundry, and she was playing outside. When I called her for lunch, she was missing.” Aware she was beginning to babble, Lucy took a deep breath. “I didn’t know where to look.”
Nate turned and whistled. “Bridget, come here, girl!” The dog came bounding to him.
The dog. Lucy dared to hope. “Do you think Bridget can find her?”
“She loves Eileen. She’ll find her.”
They turned and rode back to the cabin. There was no sign of a small blond head anywhere. Lucy fought the tears that wanted to fall. “She’s still not here.”
“I’ll look around just to make sure,” Nate said. “Did you check the privy?”
“Yes, she’s not there. Let me check again.” Lucy rushed to the privy and threw open the door. Empty. Her shoulders drooping, she followed Nate as he strode around the yard and then checked the barn.
He knelt and took Bridget’s head in his hands. “Find Eileen, Bridget.” He released her. “Go, find Eileen!”
Bridget barked and began sniffing the ground. She circled the privy, then went around to the front. She paused at Eileen’s small garden plot and then tore off toward the north.
“Quick, get the horses, we’ll follow her!”
Lucy wanted to just run after her, but she’d never keep up with the dog. She grabbed Wanda’s reins and managed to mount by herself. Nate and Jed were already ahead of her. She bounced hard in the saddle as Wanda strove to catch them.
She could hear Bridget barking as she made her way toward a meadow by the river. Eileen loved water. Her heart in her mouth, Lucy bent low over Wanda’s neck and smacked her hand on the horse’s rump. “Eileen!”
Nate and Jed reached the grove of trees, and Lucy got there a moment later. Panting nearly as hard as Wanda, she looked around for her sister. Nothing.
“We’ll check the river. You check the area.” Nate’s voice was grim, and Lucy’s eyes filled with tears as she watched him and Jed stalk purposefully toward the river. She could hear the rushing water from here. The Red River could be deadly this time of year.
Then Bridget gave a joyful bark. The dog was leaping happily into the air. Lucy looked closer and saw the still form of her sister on the ground. She rushed to Eileen and reached her just as the little girl sat up and rubbed her eyes sleepily. Bridget licked her face, and Eileen began to cry.
Lucy scooped her into her arms and hugged her fiercely. “Here she is,” she shouted.
“Lucy, you’re hurting me.”
Lucy wanted to loosen her grip, but she couldn’t let go. “I thought I’d lost you,” she whispered. “Don’t ever do that again, Eileen. You know better than to go off without telling me.”
Jed and Nate came running. Jed’s face was streaked from tears, and Nate’s eyes were bright with relief. Jed took his sister from Lucy, and she wrapped her arms and legs around him.
“I looked for you, Jed, but you was hiding,” she said reproachfully. “I walked and walked, but you weren’t there.”
Nate held out his arms for Eileen, and she went to him. He set her on the ground and knelt beside her. “Eileen, what did I tell you about watching out for Lucy?”
She hung her head. “You said to stay close to her all the time, so’s I could see her.”
“That’s right. What did you do today?”
Eileen started to cry. “I just wanted to find you and Jed. I wanted Jed to see my flowers.”
“I know, sweetheart, but you disobeyed me. You know what that means, don’t you?” Nate’s voice was gentle but firm.
“I . . . have to be punished?” Eileen’s tears flowed in earnest now.
Nate nodded. “Afraid so.”
“Nate, no! I’m just glad to have her back safe and sound.”
He took Lucy’s hand and led her away from the children. “Eileen knew the rules, Lucy. If we let her get away with it this time, she might not remember how important this rule is the next time. The next time she could drown or Indians could find her first. I’m responsible for her now, and this is the way it has to be.”
Lucy’s eyes burned from all the tears she’d shed. “You’re right. I’ve never had to punish her before.”
He turned and went back to Eileen. He picked her up and went to his horse. “We’ll discuss what the punishment will be when we get home.”
Lucy mounted her horse and followed Jed and Nate home. She knew Nate was right, but that didn’t make it easier. It had always been hard for her to discipline Eileen, who was so small and engaging. But this had been willful disobedience. She knew she wasn’t to leave the yard.
They reached the cabin, and Jed took the horses to the barn. Nate carried Eileen inside while Lucy followed, her footsteps dragging. He sat on a chair and pulled Eileen onto his lap, then motioned for Lucy to be seated next to him.
“What do you have to say, Eileen?”
“I’s sorry,” she wept. “I shouldn’t have gone out of the yard. I knew I wasn’t s’posed to.”
“Lucy was very sad when she found you gone. And we didn’t make the rule to be mean. You remember when the mongrel wolf came?”
Eileen nodded. “Lucy shooted it with the gun.”
“Another wolf could have come when Lucy wasn’t there with the gun. There are Indians and snakes too. All kinds of things that could hurt you. We make a rule because we love you. And Jesus is sad when we disobey. Do you want to tell him you’re sorry too?”
Eileen nodded again and clasped her little hands together. “Jesus, I’s sorry,” she sobbed. “I didn’t want to make you sad, and I didn’t want to worry Lucy. Help me be a good girl next time. Amen.” She sniveled and wiped her nose with the back of her hand.