“Who said that I wanted to ‘catch’ him?” I demanded.
Ursula gave me a sympathetic look, like I was a child and she was about to tell me that unicorns weren’t real.
“I saw the way that you look at him. You’ve got it bad. I’m telling you, he’s not exactly a one-girl kind of guy. After the way he’s been acting since that chick broke his heart, you don’t stand a chance.”
Broke his heart? Had I broken his heart? He was the one who’d stormed out of my room! He was the one who hadn’t called. Well, okay, maybe neither of us had called; but where was he when I needed him? Where was he while I was learning to walk again? Sure, he claimed that he’d missed me and the kiss in the hangar made it feel as if nothing had changed between us, but still.
“Don’t look so depressed, Talia,” Ursula continued. “The way I hear it, you’ve got the Director’s son wrapped around your little finger.” She held up her pinkie for emphasis.
“It’s not like that,” I insisted.
Ursula didn’t look convinced. “If that’s the case, turn him loose so that the rest of us can have a shot. He’s the only good-looking guy with all of his hair at this school, unless you count the students.” Ursula shrugged, surveying her class of teenagers like she was selecting her next meal. I gaped at her, shocked and disgusted. The oldest students at the School were two years younger than I was, and like six years younger than Ursula.
“Alright, class dismissed. Good job today, guys,” she yelled, cupping her hands around her mouth to amplify her voice.
I turned and left without another word, feeling slightly dirty after watching her ogle her male students. It was unlikely that Ursula Bane was a traitor, but she was most certainly a cradle robber.
I caught up with Kenly, and we walked together to the indoor arena for our first nightly training session. After her less-than-stellar performance in Ursula’s class, I decided to start with the basics.
Since Kenly’s Higher Reasoning Talent was more developed than her Telekinesis, she hadn’t taken advanced combat and weapons training. I’d hoped that Kenly’s poor performance during Career Fair was nerves. Unfortunately, the more that I watched her, the less optimistic I was; Kenly wasn’t a particularly good fighter.
We worked on basic maneuvers into the night, but she never once complained. Every time that she fell, she got right back up. She took every correction that I made to heart, and tried to implement them immediately – emphasis on tried. By the end of the evening she’d made no discernible improvement, yet I still left the Arena feeling confident in my decision.
“It takes time,” I assured her as we crossed the campus grounds.
Kenly pulled absently at a loose thread on the hem of her workout tee. “I know, but it feels like all the practice in the world couldn’t prepare me for my exams,” she replied.
“You’ll be ready,” I promised, willing her doubts away.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, Ms. Ly – I mean, Talia,” she said, turning to veer right on the path leading to her dorm.
“’Night, Kenly,” I called after her.
When I returned to my room, I had several comms waiting for me. One was from Erik, one from Donavon, and one from Mac. Mac wanted to know how my training session with Kenly had gone. I wasn’t eager to inform him that she was even worse than he’d originally thought, so I decided against calling him back. Donavon wanted to know if he could come over; I knew that was a bad idea, so I didn’t respond to him either. Erik’s message reminded me of something that I’d forgotten about: Festivis Day.
I hit the reply button immediately, and Erik answered on the second ring.
“Hey,” his voice filled my room.
“Hey ...how are you?”
“Better now that you decided to call me back,” he teased. I heard the bedsprings squeak and I imagined him flopping carelessly on to his bed, hopefully shirtless.
“Sorry, I’ve been busy,” I said lamely.
“Yeah, I kinda figured. So ...how about meeting me in the city for Festivis?” Erik asked tentatively.
“I have to ask Mac. I’m not really clear on whether I’m allowed to leave campus,” I said apologetically. I wanted to go - I wanted to see him. Hearing his voice wasn’t enough; I needed to touch him.
“Why don’t you suggest that you deserve some time off?” he said, emphasizing “suggest.” I caught his meaning; he wanted me to manipulate Mac into letting me go. A thrill ran through me; I wasn’t the only one missing the physical closeness.
“I’ll ask,” I promised, not bothering to hide the smile creeping into my voice.
“Good. Call me as soon as you know?”
“I’ll talk to him tomorrow,” I swore.
There was a long pause, neither of us speaking. Erik’s breathing became heavier, and my thoughts of him half-naked in his bed ran wild.
“I miss you, Tals,” he finally whispered.
“I miss you, too,” I breathed, getting a little choked up. I swallowed over the lump forming in my throat. “I’ll talk to you soon.” I disconnected before Erik could realize how emotional I was.
I considered calling Mac right then, but I wasn’t sure if he was on campus. If I was going to “suggest” that he let me go to the city for Festivis, I needed to see him in person. Resolving to hunt Mac down the following day, I crawled into bed feeling a little happier. I wasn’t sure that I’d be able to convince Mac, but the prospect of seeing Erik again so soon was too enticing to not at least try.
Chapter Twenty-Two
“So, what would it take for you to help me with Kenly?” I asked Donavon the next morning over runny scrambled eggs and burnt bacon in the cafeteria.
“Wow, admitting that you can’t do this already? She must be really awful,” he teased.
“No, no, I’m not admitting anything. I’m just asking for a little help. After all, you’re a teacher, aren’t you? Maybe you could just give me some ideas.”
“Tal, you’ve been training to be a Hunter for years. Why don’t you just do the same things that we were taught?” he asked, shoveling a huge spoonful of egg in his mouth.
“Right, and Kenly doesn’t have years. I’m looking for more of a crash course in becoming a Hunter.”
“Exactly. That’s why this is a lost cause – there’s no such thing as a ‘crash course’ in becoming a Hunter.” He grinned and bit into a heavily buttered piece of cranberry bread. I rolled my eyes.
“Donavon, look at me,” I demanded. “I really need your help.”
“Don’t you dare use your manipulation on me, Tal,” he warned.
“Pretty please,” I begged, switching tactics.
“You’re pathetic,” he declared. “But I’ll make you a deal. Tell me why you didn’t return my message last night, and I’ll help you.”
“I told you. I didn’t see your comm before I went to bed.” The lie came easily to my lips. Part of me had really wanted to see him, but part of me felt guilty about doing so after I’d promised Erik that I would try to meet him in D.C. If I’d agreed to let Donavon come over, I would have only been using him for the comfort that he provided. That wasn’t fair to either of us, or to Erik. I wasn’t ready to distance myself completely from Donavon, evidenced by the fact we were currently having breakfast together, but I knew that I needed to put a stop to any alone time.
“You’re lying,” Donavon accused.
“How dare you make such an accusation!” I feigned outrage.
“Talia, I know you better than you know yourself. I know that you’re lying.”
“You’re right,” I admitted, hoping that honesty would win me some brownie points. “Look, Donavon. I just need some time to think. I’m really confused right now.”
“About us?” he asked.
“Well, yeah - us, the spy, my health, everything,” I rambled. I knew that I didn’t want to get back together with Donavon, but I also wasn’t ready to lose him completely. If I told him about Erik, that we’d kissed and I’d nearly fainted, it
would be the end of our friendship. Now who was the one lying and omitting important details, I thought.
He put down his fork, reached across the table, and took my hand. “Take all the time you need, Tal. If you want help with Kenly, then I will help you. And if you don’t want me to come over at night, I understand.”
“Thanks,” I whispered. “I just need some time to think.”
By the end of the school day, I was in a horrendous mood. My extra time in the Crypto Bank wasn’t yielding any results, I wasn’t getting anywhere with my remaining suspects, and I hadn’t managed to locate Mac. I felt dejected and hopeless. If we didn’t find the spy, would I ever get better? The Instructors that Mac assigned me to had raised red flags initially, but they couldn’t be the only ones. I understood that they were just a starting point since they were here, but was Mac planning to send me undercover everywhere that he found a suspect? That would take years. I didn’t have that much time; Ian Crane was still out there, killing innocent people ...or was he? You have no idea what your Agency does to innocent people.
At the very least, I needed to talk to Crane again. I needed for him to answer my questions, and I needed to know why he’d sent his men to kill my parents. I needed to know what he meant by those words, the ones that played in my mind like a mantra – You have no idea what your Agency does to innocent people.
That afternoon, Donavon showed up to help with Kenly as promised. Every time that he got close to her to guide her through the moves, she blushed. I began to worry that maybe his presence was going to be more of a distraction than an asset. By the end of our second practice, I felt significantly less confident about my decision.
“Do you think she’ll ever get it?” I asked Donavon after we’d parted ways with Kenly.
“Hard to say, but doubtful, given the time constraints,” he responded, cupping the back of my neck and massaging the knots of tension away. I let his hand linger for several seconds before shrugging out of his grip. Donavon sighed heavily, but refrained from touching me again. We said goodnight in the lobby of the dorm. He didn’t ask if I wanted him to come to my room, saving me the unpleasantness of saying no.
Back in my room, I sank down on my bed, exhausted. Both Erik and Mac had left me comms. My first instinct was to call Erik back first, but I had nothing to report and decided I would wait, despite my desire to hear his voice. Instead, I dialed Mac’s number.
“Natalia,” he greeted me after the first ring.
“Hey, Mac,” I responded.
“How is the training with Ms. Baker?” he asked, sounding distracted, and as if he didn’t really care.
“Um, you know, pretty good. She’ll get the hang of it,” I mumbled, hoping that vague answers would suffice. “So, where are you? Are you on campus?” I asked.
“I just got back a couple of hours ago. I am in my office. Why?” Mac responded, finally sounding like he was giving me his undivided attention.
“I kinda wanted to talk to you about something. Can I come over?” I crossed my fingers and said a silent prayer.
“Are you okay? Did something happen?” Mac sounded alarmed, and I could imagine his gray eyes narrowing in concentration.
“Oh, I’m fine. It’s nothing like that. I just wanted to ask you a question and thought that it might be better if we talked in person,” I hedged, cringing a little at how obvious I must sound.
Mac sighed. “It’s late, Natalia. What is it that you want now?” He wasn’t going to agree to an in-person meeting – crap.
I debated for several seconds. If I asked him over the communicator and he said no, then I would’ve blown my chance; but if I waited until tomorrow, he’d likely be prepared for my suggestive question. I decided to just go for it.
“Can I go into the city for Festivis next week?” I held my breath, willing him through the phone to agree.
“I don’t know......,” he began.
Since it wasn’t an immediate no, I jumped at the opportunity to plead my case.
“Mac, please,” I begged. “No one will really be on campus anyway, and I haven’t been off this compound since you brought me here ten months ago.”
Mac didn’t answer right away, and I started to lose hope. Then he gave another tired sigh and cleared his throat.
“How are you planning to get down there? You cannot drive yourself, and I am sending Donavon to Atlanta to take part in a Festivis Day ceremony there.”
Atlanta? Why hadn’t Donavon mentioned that? Even as I felt a slight pang of bitterness, I realized that if Donavon were preoccupied I wouldn’t have to tell him that I was going to meet Erik. I knew that I should tell him, but I didn’t want to upset him.
“I thought that Penny could drive. She has her hover license and, unless I’m mistaken, she isn’t under the same restrictions that I am. She’s free to leave whenever she likes, right?”
Mac grew quiet again, and I heard the shuffling of papers across his desk and his fingers chirping on computer keys. “You may go,” he finally decided.
I let out the breath that I’d been holding and smiled from ear to ear. He’d actually agreed, and I didn’t even have to manipulate him.
“Thank you so much, Mac!” I exclaimed, wishing that I’d talked to him in person so I could hug him right then.
“Hold on - don’t get too excited just yet. You may go, but there are a couple of conditions,” he warned, backpedaling slightly. Conditions? I didn’t like the sound of that.
“Okay, sure. What conditions?” I asked hesitantly.
“No drinking, and I want you back at a decent hour,” Mac insisted. No drinking? That was fine; it wasn’t like I wanted to go just to get drunk. And a decent hour just meant that I couldn’t stay out all night. No big deal; most of the celebrations took place during the day anyway.
“No problem!” I agreed, audible excitement evident in my voice. “Thanks, Mac, I really appreciate it.”
“Gretchen and I will be in New York for the holiday. We have a banquet to attend, but Janet will be here if you need anything. I want you to report in to her when you return, so that she knows you are okay,” Mac continued.
“I can do that!” Janet was much more lenient than Mac. As long as I didn’t have a seizure, she’d let me do whatever I wanted. Now I just had to convince Penny, and I doubted that she would need much encouragement; Penny loved getting dressed up.
I felt a hundred times better as I brushed my teeth and got ready for bed. While I was mostly excited about seeing Erik, I was also happy to finally leave the grounds. Even with my newly acquired freedom, the campus still felt like a prison.
After donning my pajamas, I dialed Erik and rested my head on the pillow while I waited for him to answer.
“Hello?” he said groggily.
“Guess what?” I practically squealed.
“Hey, Tals,” he replied, sounding more awake now that he knew it was me. “I’m guessing by how excited you sound that you talked to the Director?”
“I did,” I confirmed. “And, he said I can go!”
“Good,” Erik sounded relieved, but not nearly as enthusiastic as I’d hoped.
“You still want to meet me, right?” I asked, a little worried that he’d changed his mind.
“Of course. I’m sorry, I’m just really tired. It’s late, and Henri and I are leaving in the morning for a mission,” he said, trying to muster a happier tone for my benefit.
“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t know......” I felt just the tiniest bit guilty now. I should’ve checked the time, but in my haste to hear his voice, I hadn’t bothered.
“It’s okay. I can’t wait to see you,” he added.
“Yeah, me too. ’Night, Erik. Be safe tomorrow.” I smiled, wishing that I’d chosen the holograph option when I called, so that I could see his face.
“’Night, Tals. I’ll call you when I get back.” With that he disconnected and I pulled the covers tighter around me, wishing that they were his arms.
Chapter Twenty-Three
The days quickly began to run together. Every morning I woke and met Donavon in the Instructor cafeteria for breakfast. After that was my routine visit to the Medical building for a daily dose of Dr. Thistler and her not-so-miracle equalizing drug. Some mornings I would sneak down to the Psych wing and visit Ernest after I met with her. Most days I just sat in his room and watched him stare off into space. Other days I brought books and read random chapters to him, hoping to elicit a reaction. Someday I hoped to have the courage to try restoring some of the memories that I’d stolen, but as of yet I was too scared.
After my visit with Ernest, I’d make my way over to the Crypto Bank. I spent the following hours searching through personnel files while Penny and Gemma did whatever it was that Crypto workers actually did on a day-to-day basis. I spent my lunch hour training with Kenly since her skills were more remedial than I’d first thought.
I also attended the classes that Mac still wanted me to assist in. Annalise kept me busy grading papers, and I continued to engage her in small talk at every opportunity. Cadence continued to dislike me, and I continued to reciprocate her feelings. Mac grudgingly agreed to release me from my obligation to assist Thad, so that was another hour that I spent back in the Crypto Bank. I took out my aggression by sparring with Griffin’s students; some days my feelings were so out of control that he had to remind me to go easy on them. Ursula’s class gave me more time to work with Kenly, and I didn’t waste it. I routinely spent the hour focused on helping her develop her abilities, and avoided talking to Ursula about Erik.
Ursula’s comment about the “chick” that had broken his heart weighed heavily on my mind. Was I really that “chick”? I was almost certain that I was.
Thoughts of Erik consumed my dreams and distracted me from my daily tasks. I played his messages over and over again just to hear his voice. It didn’t compare to actually talking to him, but I didn’t really have another option since he was away on his mission.