Right where the giant could see them.
Enormous knees creaking, he rose to his full height.
“You!” The giant pointed at Jack with a finger the size of a pool noodle. “You are the little thief who stole my singing harp!”
The giant took one giant step forward.
“Run!” shouted Billy.
He took off with Jack and Walter close behind. They dashed between the giant’s booted feet and raced toward a tight tangle of twisting trails.
“Whaaa?” The giant bent at the waist, tucked his head between his legs, and watched the fleeing boys. “Why are you children upside down?”
After maybe ten minutes in a maze of trees Billy and Walter had not yet explored, they came to a tall chain-link fence. A squat cinder-block building with dark tinted windows sat in a small clearing on the other side. A satellite dish was mounted on its roof.
“What’s that?” said Walter.
“I don’t know,” said Billy. “But we should hide in there!”
Walter jiggled the gate. “It’s locked.”
“I’ll climb over it,” said Jack. “I’m good at climbing.”
He grabbed hold of the fencing.
ZZZZT!
It sparked and crackled. The jolt nearly knocked Jack out of his pointy-toed boots.
“It’s electrified!” said Billy.
“So it’d be perfect to hide behind,” said Walter. He rattled the gate again. The gate wasn’t electrified, but it was still locked.
“Never fear,” said Jack. “I’ll be nimble, I’ll be quick!”
“Um, I think that’s the wrong story,” said Walter.
“Never mind,” said Billy. “We can use it. Go!”
Jack scurried up a nearby tree to a branch that stretched out over the electrified fence. In no time he was safe on the ground on the other side—which was a good thing.
Because the earth started quaking again.
“Fee, fi, fo, fum!”
The giant thrashed through the forest.
He was close, and coming closer.
“Hide behind that building!” Billy shouted at Jack. “Hurry.”
Jack ran behind the cinder-block structure.
“N-n-now what?” said Walter as the whole forest trembled every time the giant stepped closer.
“We need to make up our own fairy tale,” said Billy.
The giant shoved aside two leafy treetops and peered down at Billy and Walter.
“Fee, fi, fo, fum! I smell the blood of an Englishman!”
Walter wheezed and pumped. Wheezed and pumped.
“Jack’s not here,” said Billy as coolly as he could.
“Where did he go?”
“Upstairs.” He jabbed his thumb toward the sky.
“That little thief stole my magic harp.”
“We know. He told us. And while you’re wasting your time down here, chasing after Walter and me, Jack’s back up in the clouds grabbing your goose, the one that lays the golden eggs.”
“No!” said the giant, turning his massive body around as quickly as he could, which wasn’t very quickly at all. “He cannot have Goldie!”
“Then you better hurry home to protect her.”
“I will!”
And off he lumbered. Slowly. Very, very slowly. Each step thudded like it was taken by a twenty-ton elephant wearing cement work boots.
When the giant was finally out of sight, Walter was able to breathe a little easier.
“So, he’s going to climb back up the beanstalk to his castle in the sky?”
“Yup,” said Billy. “We’ll give him a five-minute head start. Then we’ll run back to Jack’s house, find an ax, and—”
A sharp reflection of something silver flared through the trees.
Billy grabbed Walter and pulled him down behind the nearest clump of shrubs.
A gangly six-foot-tall gecko—dressed in a shiny silver space suit—crept through the forest toting a silver ray gun. His curled silver tail slithered along the forest floor behind him.
“I don’t believe this,” said Billy.
“W-w-what?” stammered Walter. “Wh-wh-who is that?”
“The Space Lizard.”
The crazy island was spinning wildly out of control.
“Who?” asked Walter in a panicky whisper.
“From the comic books and video games.”
The Space Lizard flicked out his tongue and nabbed a robin’s egg from a nearby nest.
When the mother bird squawked, the Space Lizard hissed at her. His acidic spit shriveled a clump of leaves and blackened the branches of the tree.
“He eats eggs?” asked Walter.
“He collects them,” Billy explained. “Different eggs are worth different points.”
The Space Lizard had his visor rolled up into his astronaut helmet, exposing his long, twitchy snout, beady black eyes, and flittering tongue. His acid-blaster ray gun had so many bulges and bubbles along its barrel it looked like it had been designed by a guy who also made balloon poodles.
In the distance, Billy could see the giant climbing up the beanstalk, which had poked a hole in the mesh dome. He was telephone-poling his way toward a towering cauliflower of a cloud, which, when the sunlight shifted, really did look like a cotton-candy castle in the sky.
“Fee, fi, fo, fum!” The giant’s voice boomed like rolling thunder through the air. “I’ve come to get you, Englishman!”
The Space Lizard heard the giant, too. He twitched his head sideways. Tilted it up. Twitched it some more.
And then the Space Lizard hopped over a stump and darted into the thick forest. It looked like he might be heading to Jack’s house.
Billy and Walter stood up.
“Billy? How did a monster from a video game end up on our island?”
“I don’t know. Maybe when Nick Farkas came out here yesterday, he brought along a couple of his Space Lizard comic books or that cheat guide his mother bought him.”
An ear-piercing boat horn blared in the distance.
“That’s my mom,” said Billy. “I’ve gotta go. My dad’s here.”
“But the giant,” said Walter. “When he finds out you were just making that stuff up about Jack and the goose, he’ll climb back down.”
“It’ll be okay. Jack’s safe.”
“Yes, I am!” shouted Jack from behind the cinder-block building.
Walter was still worried. “But what about the treasure? How can we dig it up if the Space Lizard—”
“Walter, my dad is here. My mom needs me. We’ll come back later to deal with everything else.”
“B-b-but—”
“Later!”
“Good luck at home,” said Walter once the rowboat was tied up at the dock.
“Thanks.”
“If you need anything …”
“I’ll let you know.”
Walter took off for the Hodgepodge Lodge. Billy made his way toward Dr. Libris’s cabin.
He noticed cookout supplies spread across the backyard. A small charcoal grill. Fancy barbecue cooking utensils that all matched. A grocery sack filled with marshmallows, chocolate bars, and graham crackers.
His dad probably brought all that junk up from the city. He loved making s’mores, even in their apartment’s toaster oven.
Billy picked up his pace.
His mom and dad were nowhere in sight.
So he headed around the side of the cabin and into the driveway, where he saw his dad’s convertible. A bunch of grocery bags were lined up on the gravel behind the rear bumper.
And then he heard his parents.
It sounded like they were around the corner, talking on the front porch.
“You really want to do a cookout, Bill?” he heard his mother say.
“It’s what we always do at the lake,” said his dad.
“That was a long time ago.”
“I thought it might make this … easier.”
“For who?”
“For Billy.
Where is he, anyway?”
“In a hurry to tell him your big news?”
Billy held on to the side of his dad’s car for support.
He didn’t know what to do.
So he put on a brave smile and rounded the corner. It was time to play the real, live glad game.
“Hey, Dad!”
“There you are!” Billy’s father came down the porch steps and gave Billy a bear hug. “How you doin’, kiddo?”
“Not bad. How’s New York?”
“Crazy busy. Oh, that reminds me.” His dad broke out of the hug and went back to the porch to retrieve the shoulder bag he carried to work instead of a briefcase. “I swung by the Apple Store.”
He handed Billy a brand-new iPhone.
“Your mom told me what happened to your old one. Ouch.”
“That’s an early birthday gift, Billy,” said his mother.
“That’s right,” said his dad. “Your mom and I talked about it. We both agreed.”
Billy took the iPhone. His birthday wasn’t till September.
Did this mean his mom and dad weren’t getting back together after the summer?
His dad had the queasy look on his face that he always got right before he had to say something grown-up-ish instead of silly.
“Well, I better, um, go inside and charge it,” said Billy.
“Your dad wants to talk to you,” said his mom, sounding even sadder than she had at breakfast. Guess this story wasn’t turning out the way she wanted it to, either.
“Yeah,” said his father. “We need to talk.”
“Okay. But right now I want to, you know …” He waggled the iPhone.
“Sure,” said his dad. “We’ll talk later. We’re putting together a little cookout.”
“I saw. I’ll be upstairs in my room.”
Billy went into the cabin, ran up the steps, and flopped down face-first onto his bed. He didn’t even plug in his shiny new iPhone.
He just wished he could head back to the island, where, sooner or later, stories seemed to find their happy endings.
Billy spent the rest of the afternoon avoiding his parents.
He figured if they couldn’t sit him down for “the talk,” they couldn’t tell him their news. From the look on his mother’s face, he could guess it wasn’t anything good.
He decided he’d try to sneak downstairs. Hide over at Walter’s place.
But his dad caught him at the back door.
“Hey, Billy,” his dad said, gesturing toward two lawn chairs. “Got a minute?”
“Well, I really wanted to run next door. Show my friend Walter my new iPhone.”
“Okay,” said his mom, coming down from the cabin with a small cooler filled with drinks. “But dinner is at six.”
“Can Walter come?”
“Not tonight, hon. Family only. Okay?”
Billy nodded.
And he ran over to Walter’s house.
Walter’s bedroom was under the upside-down boat section of the Hodgepodge Lodge.
Billy plugged his new iPhone into the wall so he and Walter could load it up with apps.
“This house is so awesome,” said Billy.
“Yeah,” said Walter. “Dr. Libris liked it, too. He’d always say my dad had an amazing imagination. Then he’d say something like ‘too bad you’re not Walter’s age,’ and they’d both laugh.”
“Why?”
Walter shrugged. “They’re grown-ups. Who knows why grown-ups laugh at anything?”
His mom came into the boat bedroom with a plate of homemade cookies.
“Thanks for taking Alyssa out to the island,” she said. “That was sweet of you boys.”
“You’re welcome,” said Billy.
The instant Mrs. Andrews was gone, Walter took in a deep breath. “You know, Billy, I’ve been thinking. And you were right. It was my fault. I shouldn’t’ve let Alyssa go out to the island with Jack and the Beanstalk.”
“Don’t worry. We’ll take care of it.”
“When?”
“Tomorrow. I promise.”
Walter sniffed the air. “Are you guys grilling burgers?”
“Yeah. And hot dogs.”
“Can I come over?”
“Sorry. I asked. They said it’s family-only tonight.”
“Seriously?”
“Seriously.”
“This sounds bad, Billy. Way bad.”
“Yeah. Tell me about it.”
“You want another burger?” Billy’s dad asked.
“Sure,” said Billy.
“That’s your third one!”
Billy was still stalling. He burped to make enough room for his next burger.
“Billy?” his mom whispered when his dad was back at the grill. “I know this is hard, but you really need to talk with your father.”
“I don’t want to.”
“But you need to.” She took a breath and looked Billy square in the eyes. “He’s going to L.A.”
“To film more commercials?”
“No. He sold one of his screenplays.”
Billy brightened. He and Walter might not need to find that treasure after all. “That means he’ll make a ton of money, right?”
“Yes,” she answered carefully. “It also means he wants to live out there. Permanently.”
Billy refused to meet her gaze. “Cool,” he said casually. “I could learn how to surf.”
“Billy? You and I will be staying here. Well, not here. We’d keep the apartment in the city while your dad …”
Billy wanted to jab his fingers in his ears and scream, “NAH, NAH, NAH, NAH!” so he wouldn’t have to hear any more of this. Instead, he blurted, “How about marshmallows?”
“Billy? Did you hear what I just said?”
“One burger, coming up!” his dad called from the grill.
“I changed my mind,” Billy called back, standing up from the picnic table. “I’m ready for dessert. I’m going to gather up some green sticks so we can toast those marshmallows.”
Billy rushed over to the stand of trees bordering Walter’s backyard.
“Hi, Billy.”
It was Alyssa.
“What’re you guys doing?”
Billy wasn’t sure what to tell her, exactly. “Uh, getting ready to toast some marshmallows.”
“How come you’re not camping with Walter?”
“What?”
“Walter told Mom that you guys were spending the night out on the island. He packed up his sleeping bag and everything.”
Billy looked toward the island.
What was Walter trying to do?
“When did he leave?”
“About an hour ago. Right after you went home. He took our canoe.”
Billy’s mind raced.
Walter could get in serious trouble all by himself on the island.
Especially at night.
Especially if the giant climbed back down the beanstalk—not to mention that an alien lizard from an extremely violent video game was hopping around spritzing everything it could find with hydrochloric acid.
“Billy?”
“What?”
“Tell Walter to bring back my library book.”
“Huh?”
“Jack and the Beanstalk. He took that out to the island, too.”
Billy snatched a couple of twigs off the ground.
He had to get back to the island, fast.
It was time to wrap up the family cookout, even if that meant sitting down and talking with his dad.
“You know what?” he said. “I’m stuffed. Here’s some sticks. You guys can toast marshmallows without me. What do you want to talk about, Dad?”
His mom dropped her head and walked away.
His dad got that queasy face again. He scooted two lawn chairs around on the grass so they were facing each other. Billy sat down. His father took a seat and put on his serious grown-up face.
“Son, as you may have noticed, your mom and I …”
 
; “BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH,” was all Billy heard for the next five, maybe ten, minutes.
Finally, his father finished. “We just think it’ll be best for everybody.”
“So when are you leaving?” Billy asked. “Right now?”
“No. I’m going to spend the night. Sleep in the living room.”
Billy just nodded.
“Well, I’m glad we could have this talk.”
Grown-ups always said that.
Apparently, talking made them feel better, even when the same talk made a kid feel worse.
“Can I be excused now?” Billy asked, the way he would if they were at the dinner table back home.
“Oh. Sure. Guess you need some time to think about all this, huh?”
“Yeah.”
The sun was starting to set.
Night was falling.
Walter was all alone on the island.
Well, actually, he wasn’t alone.
And that was the problem.
Billy hurried down to the dock.
“Where are you going, hon?” his mom called from the back porch.
“Out to the island.”
“It’s getting dark.”
“I’ll be okay. My new iPhone has a flashlight app.”
“Okay. Be sure to wear—”
Billy held up his life jacket before she could say it.
His mom hugged herself like she was cold, and headed back into the cabin.
Billy docked at the island just as the sun set.
When he reached the field on the far side of the gate, he saw Robin Hood, Maid Marian, Hercules, Tom Sawyer, and Pollyanna. All of them were sitting on logs set up in a semicircle, and they were staring at something on the ground.
Billy flicked on his flashlight app and waved his iPhone.
“You guys? It’s me. Have any of you seen Walter?”
“Yes,” said Hercules. “As soon as Pollyanna told us that Walter was alone on the island, we came rushing back.”
“And,” said Robin, “we were most surprised to learn that thou, Sir William, were not here assisting valiant Walter in his noble quest.”
“Robin?” said Maid Marian, shaking her head. “Leave Billy be.”
“I’m sorry,” mumbled Billy. “I had this thing. With my parents. So, where is he?”