His ragged breathing sounded in her ear as he placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. “That’s the problem,” he said quietly. “Every time I touch you it nearly kills me to let you go. Someday you won’t send me away, Cupcake.”
“Don’t call me that. I told you that before.”
The phone rang and she glanced at it guiltily, not able to answer it with her dough-covered hands.
“Aren’t you going to answer it?” Blake demanded.
She waved a floury hand in his direction.
“Wash your hands. I’ll get it for you.”
Because the water was running in the sink, Caasi didn’t hear what Blake said or who was on the line.
“It’s someone by the name of June. She sounded shocked that a man would answer your phone.”
Caasi threw him an angry glare and picked up the receiver. “Yes, June.”
“Who was that?” June demanded in low tones.
“My general manager. No one important.” Caasi smiled at Blake sweetly, hoping the dig had hit its mark.
“I just got out of the doctor’s office and he said that everything is looking great. He also said that I could have someone in the delivery room with me when my time came, and I was wondering if you’d like to be there.”
Caasi didn’t even have to think twice. “I’d love to, but what about Burt?”
“Oh, he doesn’t mind. I can have two people with me, and I wanted you to be one of them.”
“I’m honored.”
“I’m going to be touring the hospital facilities on Friday. Could you come?”
“Yes; that shouldn’t be any problem. I’ll phone you in the morning once I’ve had a chance to check my schedule.”
“I’ll let you get back to that unimportant, sexy-sounding manager.”
Caasi laughed lightly, knowing she hadn’t fooled her intuitive friend. “Talk to you tomorrow,” Caasi promised, and hung up.
When she returned to the kitchen, she discovered that Blake had taken off his jacket, rolled up his sleeves, and was placing the piecrust into the pan with the ease of an expert.
“Just what do you think you’re doing?” she demanded righteously.
“I figured you couldn’t possibly eat all this yourself and you’d probably want to invite me to dinner.”
“You have a high opinion of yourself, Blake Sherrill.”
His boyish smile would have disarmed a battalion. “And if you plan to invite me to dinner, the very least I can do is offer a hand in its making.”
Five
“Well, don’t just stand there,” Blake insisted. “Beat the eggs.”
Caasi hesitated, her feelings ambivalent. She wanted to tell Blake to leave, to get out of her life. He had hurt her in a way she had never expected. But at the same time he had awakened her to what it meant to be a woman, and she wanted him with her. He made her laugh, and when he touched her she felt more alive than she had in all her twenty-eight years.
Not fully understanding the reasons why, Caasi decided to swallow her pride and let him stay. She took the eggs and cracked them against the side of the bowl one by one. Silently they worked together. Caasi whipped the eggs until they were light and frothy while Blake chopped onion and green pepper and sliced zucchini.
“I’m going to the hospital Friday,” Caasi mentioned casually.
Blake paused and turned toward her. “Is something wrong?”
“No,” she assured him. “It’s one of the most natural things in the world. Babies usually are.”
A stunned silence crackled in the tension-filled room. “Did you say ‘baby’?”
Caasi was enjoying this. “Yes,” she murmured without looking up, pouring the milk into the measuring cup.
“Are you trying to tell me you’re pregnant?” Blake demanded.
Caasi had trouble keeping a smile from forming. “I’m not trying to tell you anything. All I did was make a casual comment about going to the hospital Friday.”
“Because of a baby?”
Caasi nodded. She could see the exasperation in his expression.
Blake’s eyes raked over her, and she noticed the way the paring knife was savagely attacking the green pepper. “Who’s the father?”
“Burt.”
“Who’s Burt?”
“June’s husband.”
“But that was June on the phone and …” Blake stopped in mid-sentence, as understanding leapt into his eyes. “You little tease,” he said deeply. “I should make you pay for that.”
“Tease? Me?” Caasi feigned shock. “How could you accuse me of something like that? You have to remember, I’m not a real woman, with real blood.”
Blake linked his arms around her waist and nuzzled her neck. “I don’t know, you’re becoming more womanlike by the minute.”
“You think so, do you?” A throb of excitement ran through her at his touch. Fleetingly Caasi wondered why she hadn’t experienced these sensations with other men.
“Yes, I do.” He turned her into his arms, linking his hands at the small of her back. Hungrily, his gaze studied her.
Caasi gave a nervous laugh and broke free. These feelings Blake was creating within her were all too new, too strong. They frightened her.
“I want you to know,” Caasi began, taking a shaky breath, “I thought about what you said at the dance—about having ink in my veins.”
A silence seemed to fill the small kitchen. “And?” Blake asked her softly.
“And I think you’re probably right. Ever since Dad died, I’ve been so busy with Crane Enterprises that I’ve allowed that role to dominate my life.” She slipped the onion and other vegetables he had chopped into the egg mixture and poured it over the thinly sliced zucchini already in the piecrust. “June and Edie tried to tell me the same thing,” she said, and gave a weak laugh. “Edie said what I needed was an affair.”
“An affair,” Blake repeated slowly, his dark eyes unreadable. “So that’s what this is all about.”
“What?”
“You heard me. What happened then? Did you suddenly look at me and see the most likely candidate?” His words went cold.
“Of course not. I thought Edie was nuts. I’m not the type of woman who would have an affair. Do you honestly think I’d do something like that?”
“Why not? I won’t be around much longer. You can have your fling and be done with me.”
Words momentarily failed her as she struggled to control her outrage. “Why do you do this to me? I started out by telling you that you were right in what you’d said about me and suddenly I’m on the defensive again.” One hand gripped the oven door, and she knotted the other until the long nails bit into her palm. “June and Edie had noticed that I have no life except the business. All I’m saying is that I’m trying to change that.” Irritated with her inability to explain herself in simpler terms, Caasi walked across the suite to stand in front of the large picture window. Her arms hugged her stomach. These changes made her vulnerable to Blake. If these changes only brought pain, then she wanted no part of it.
He came to stand beside her but made no attempt to touch her. “Have you noticed how we can’t seem to be together anymore without disagreeing about one thing or another?”
“Oh yes, I’ve noticed.” Her hands dropped to fists at her side.
“By all rights you should throw me out.”
Caasi knew that, but she didn’t want him to leave. He might have the power to wound, but just as strong was his ability to comfort and heal.
“That wouldn’t be fair.” A wry smile twisted her mouth. “You made half the dinner.” It didn’t make sense, Caasi realized, but she wanted him with her, liked having him around.
“Truce, Caasi?” His voice was soft and gruff at the same time.
“For how long?” They hadn’t gone without fighting for more than a few minutes lately.
“Just tonight. We can get through one night without arguing.”
Caasi resisted the temptation to slip her arms
around him. “Working together, we can manage it.” They’d been a team for years—but soon that, too, would change. The thought was a forceful reminder that Blake had turned in his resignation and would be leaving soon. She wondered if she’d ever see him again after he left the Empress. The realization produced a painful sensation in the area of her heart. Blake had always been there. She relied on him. Nothing would be the same after he left. But she couldn’t mention that now. Not when they’d agreed on a truce. Every time she said something about him leaving, they argued.
“The quiche has to bake for an hour. Let’s listen to some music,” he suggested.
“And have a glass of wine.”
Caasi kept a supply of her favorite Chablis available and brought down two crystal glasses. While she poured, Blake reached for his phone and music started to play.
Music filled the suite as Caasi brought their drinks into the living room.
Blake sat on the couch, holding out his arm to indicate he wanted her at his side. Caasi handed him the wine and sat next to him on the plush leather sofa, leaning her head against his shoulder. A hand cupping her upper arm kept her close. Not that Caasi wanted to be anyplace else.
The music was mellow and soft, the ballad a love song. Oftentimes, after a long day, Caasi would sit with her feet propped up on the coffee table, close her eyes, and let the music work its magic on her tired body. But the only magic she needed that night was Blake.
“June asked me to go into the delivery room with her when her baby is born,” Caasi said, elaborating on the earlier conversation. “That’s why I’m going to the hospital this Friday. They want to familiarize the three of us with the procedures.”
“Three of you?”
“Four, actually,” Caasi said, correcting herself. “Burt, June, baby, and me.”
“You’re sure you want to do this?” Caasi felt his gaze wandering over her as if in assessment. “From what I understand, labor is no picnic, and for someone who’s never had a baby, it may be more than you can handle.”
Caasi stiffened. “I want to be there and nothing’s going to stop me.”
Blake glanced at his wristwatch. “Twenty minutes.”
“What’s twenty minutes?”
“How long we lasted without arguing.”
“We didn’t fight. I was tempted, but being the mature woman I am, I managed to avoid telling you that I found that remark unnecessarily condescending.”
Blake chuckled and took a sip of his wine. “I’m glad. Because then I can admit that sometimes I say things purposely just to see the anger spark in your eyes. You’re beautiful when you let that invisible guard down, and sometimes anger is the only thing that lowers it.”
Every part of her was conscious of Blake. Pressed close to his side, she ached for the feel of his arms around her and the taste of his mouth. But their truce wasn’t limited to arguments, although they hadn’t stated as much. They needed to find a level plane, a happy medium between the fighting and the loving.
“I’m working to change that about myself,” Caasi admitted softly. “When Dad was in charge he was firm in his belief about mixing business with pleasure. When he was in the office he was one man, and outside the office, another. In some ways I’m a lot like my father. We’ve worked together five years, Blake, but I never saw you as anything more than my general manager.”
“And you do now?”
Her voice was becoming huskier as she strove to keep the emotion out of it. “Yes.”
“Because I’m leaving?”
“Say …” She laughed shakily. “Why am I doing all the talking? Shouldn’t you make some deep revelation about yourself?”
Blake’s answering grin was dry. “I like fine wine”—he raised the glass to his lips and took a sip—“and the challenge of climbing mountains. I love the Pacific and enjoy walks along the beach in the early hours of the morning before the sun rises. Sometimes when the mood comes over me, I paint.” He paused. “Does that satisfy your curiosity?”
“In some ways.” But he didn’t offer to reveal more, and the point was well noted.
The timer on the stove rang and Caasi reluctantly broke from his arms. “I’ll check our dinner.”
She set the quiche on top of the stove to cool and returned to the living room. Blake was looking out the window at the view.
“Some nights, especially when things are troubling me,” Caasi admitted softly, as she joined him, “I’ll stand here and think.”
“So that’s why there’s a worn spot in the carpet,” Blake teased.
“I’ve been here a lot lately.”
“Why?” Blake turned and took a step toward her. Only a few inches separated them.
Caasi lowered her gaze to the floor and shrugged. “Lots of things.”
“Anything in particular?”
She ignored the question. “The quiche is ready if you are.”
Blake brushed a strand of hair from her face. When his hand grazed her cheek, Caasi swallowed her gasp of pleasure.
“No,” Blake said slowly, his words barely audible. “I’m not ready.” His hand worked its way around the back of her neck, his fingers twining into her hair as he brought her mouth up to meet his.
With a small whisper of welcome, Caasi swayed into him, melting against him, her arms reaching instinctively for him. Her response was so automatic she didn’t have time to question it.
As his mouth plundered hers, Caasi felt as though she were on fire, the burning heat spreading down her legs until she was weak and clinging.
This wasn’t supposed to happen, they’d promised each other it wouldn’t, but they were like two climbers waiting to explore a mountain and would no longer be denied the thrill of the challenge.
Her hands reveled in the feel of the hard muscles and smooth skin of his back. A languor spread through her, and her breath came in short, soft gasps.
Blake buried his face in the hollow of her throat and shuddered. “Let’s eat,” he whispered, and Caasi smiled at the husky timbre of his voice as she realized he was experiencing the same sensations she was.
Neither showed much interest in the meal. Blake commented that she’d done a good job and Caasi was pleased with her efforts, but her mind wasn’t on the food.
They hardly spoke, but each intuitively seemed to know what the other was thinking. Caasi wished she had her wine, and without a word Blake stood and brought it to her.
Simultaneously they set their forks across half-full plates, their interest in food entirely gone. Blake stood and held out his hand to her.
Heedless of where he was taking her, Caasi realized she would have followed him to Mars. She placed her hand in his. Blake reached for his phone and once more the music played as he led her back to the sofa.
Caasi slid an arm around him and rested the side of her face close to his heart. Blake rubbed his jaw against the top of her head in a slow, rotating action that was faintly hypnotic. His fingers were in her hair.
Caasi didn’t need to look to know that his eyes were closed. This was like a dream, a trance from which she never wanted to wake. The barriers were down.
Caasi didn’t know how long he had held her. The music had faded long ago, but they made their own. She didn’t even need to close her eyes to hear the violins.
Blake shifted and Caasi was shocked to look at her watch and see that it was almost midnight.
“Walk me to the door,” he whispered, and kissed the crown of her head, his breath stirring her dark hair.
She nodded, not finding the words to release him readily.
“Our truce lasted,” she said softly, and added, with a warm smile, “sort of.”
“If we’re going to fight, let’s do it like this. Agreed?” He took her in his arms, gazing down at her upturned face with a warmth that reached all the way to the soles of her feet.
“Yes, I agree.” Her hand lovingly stroked his thick, unruly hair. “Are you really going to leave me, Blake?”
He went complete
ly still. “How do you mean?”
Did he think she was asking him to spend the night? If she was honest, she’d admit the thought wasn’t an alien one. But she had been sincere when she explained that she wasn’t one to indulge in casual affairs. She wanted Blake; Caasi couldn’t deny it. But she wanted him forever.
“The Empress,” she explained. “You’re not going to leave, are you?” The minute the words were out, she knew she’d said the wrong thing.
Blake looked as if she’d physically struck him. He pulled her arms away, severing the contact. “So that was what this was all about.” Impatience shadowed his face.
“Blake, no!” But he wasn’t listening as he sharply turned, opened the door, and left.
“There’s a Gina Sherrill to see you,” Laurie announced the following Monday.
“Send her in,” Caasi replied. “And, Laurie, could you see to it that we’re not disturbed?”
“Of course.”
Gina stepped into the office a moment later.
“Hi, Caasi.” She looked uncertain, her eyes taking in the expensive décor of the room. “Wow, you’ve got a great view from up here, haven’t you? How do you ever get anything done?”
“It’s hard, especially on a sunny day like today when it seems that the whole world is outside this window and ready to be explored.”
“We missed you Sunday.”
Caasi rolled a pen between her palms. “I had a previous engagement.” The lie was a small one.
“Everyone likes you, and we were hoping you’d come again.”
“I will,” Caasi assured her, but secretly doubted that she could. Not with Blake in his present state of mind. Another confrontation with him was to be avoided at all costs. Since the night they’d cooked together they treated each other like polite strangers. Blake had hired his replacement and was training the middle-aged man now. Caasi liked Brian Harris and had recognized almost instantly that she wouldn’t have any trouble working with him.
Blake’s last day was scheduled for the end of the month, less than ten days away.
“Let’s go down to the Blue Room and you can tell me what kind of decorations you want. Are the other women coming?” Caasi asked. Gina had asked to include her maid of honor and bridesmaids in the shower planning.