How could Shauna Alexander possibly begin to understand all that his daughter meant to him? How could she comprehend the fact that Charity was the last piece of Faith he had—the only lasting reminder? How dare she spend so much time focusing on the negative without once mentioning Charity’s need for love and acceptance?
In her entire conversation, she hadn’t taken the time to once address the need in Charity’s life, only the lack. Well, he would show her. He would telephone Mrs. Fritz and deal with this first thing in the morning.
Just as soon as he had a chance to cool down and think a little more rationally.
“Daddy?” Charity’s voice rang out. He heard it, but his thoughts wouldn’t still themselves long enough to respond. Shauna had no right to pass judgment on a child she barely knew. She had only worked at the school a few weeks, for Pete’s sake. And Mrs. Fritz would have let him know if Charity was really as bad as all that.
“Daddy!” Charity let out another squeal. “Teacher mean!”
Yes, she is.
“Teacher mean. Charity no like teacher.”
“I know, honey.” He sighed. “But don’t worry about that now. We’re going home.”
“Go store.” She kicked her feet against the back of his seat.
“No. We’re going home, honey, not the store.”
“Go store, Daddy. Buy baby a toy.” Whining followed then a few tears.
“You’re not a baby anymore,” he corrected. “You’re Daddy’s big girl.”
“Toy!”
“We’re going home, Charity.”
She let out a cry, and he struggled to keep his wits about him as he drove. Sure, Charity was a handful, but so were all two- and three-year-olds. No reason to think she surpassed the other children with bad behavior.
“Toy, Daddy!” Charity continued to cry out. “We go to store!”
“No store, Charity. Now be a good girl and stop crying.”
Instead of heeding his plea, she cried even louder. I do need to pick up a few things from the store. Kent sighed. I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to stop off at the toy department and pick up a little something for her. She’s had a hard day. We’ve both had a bad day.
His thoughts shifted to Shauna again. “She’s the reason for my daughter’s bad day.”
Oh, but how Shauna’s beautiful eyes had glistened as she had poured out her heart in the lobby of the day-care center. Her cheeks had flushed with a passionate glow as she laid out a plan for change. For some reason, her words and her passion left a lasting memory etched upon his seared conscience. Was she right? Did he need to make some changes? Was Charity as bad as she seemed to think?
“Toy, Daddy!” Charity kicked the back of his seat, bringing him back to his senses. With his thoughts a jumbled mess, he turned the car in the direction of the store.
twelve
Shauna brushed away a loose tear as she struggled to bring some order to the classroom. “Children, pick up your toys. We’re going to go to the playground.”
As usual, most of the children chattered merrily as they picked up the colorful blocks and puzzle pieces. All but Charity, who refused to cooperate. Instead, she sulked in the corner.
Shauna gazed at the youngster, her heart twisting. How could I not have noticed her bright green eyes—same as Kent’s? And that round bulb of a nose? She’s almost a duplicate, feature for feature.
Charity yanked up a block into her tiny palm and threw it across the room, nearly hitting one of the other children. Shauna scolded her as she reached down to pick up the block. “Charity, be careful.” When she did not receive a response, she added, “It’s time to pick up.”
“No.” The youngster folded her arms. “No pick up. You.”
Shauna shook her head, trying to imagine how someone as wonderful as Kent Chapman could possibly manage a handful like this.
Of course, he hadn’t seemed so wonderful during their last exchange. In fact, he had been downright rude.
Well, maybe not rude—but irritated. And determined to prove her wrong. Am I wrong? Have I been too hard on his daughter? If I had known Charity was his little girl, would I have treated her differently? Would I have treated him differently?
Too late to worry about all of that now. Chances were pretty good Kent Chapman would never speak to her again. If he doesn’t, that’s just childish. We can be friends, at the very least. Besides, someone has to be honest with him about his daughter. She’s spoiled rotten. If I don’t speak up, who will? She glanced down at the youngster, who sat on the floor playing, completely ignoring Shauna’s instruction.
“Charity, pick up your puzzle.” This time, instead of raising her voice, Shauna walked over to the youngster and helped her with the task. Charity’s cheeks blazed pink with excitement. “Outside! Play.”
“Yes, we’re going out right now. Just as soon as you finish picking up. That’s what big girls do.”
“Charity baby.”
“Charity is a big girl. You’re Daddy’s big girl, and you’re teacher’s big girl, too.” Shauna gave the warmest smile she could muster.
“I big girl. I pick up.” Charity flew into action, scooping up puzzle pieces. She smiled as she finished. “Go outside now?”
“Yes, we go outside.” Charity stood and reached for Shauna’s hand.
Shauna led the little ones out to the playground, where they at once headed for the swings.
Soft-spoken Dinah gave Marisa her spot on the swings. Clay, ever the clown, made faces at the two of them, and they giggled then told him to go away. He refused, choosing to tease them even more.
Precious Abigail climbed to the top of the slide but seemed hesitant to slide down until Joey and Jonathan came up behind her and insisted she give them a turn. McKinsey Chesterfield and petite Elizabeth Darby held hands and spun in a circle.
Bobby lingered behind, begging for a snack. When Shauna refused, he sauntered off to join Danny on the teeter-totter, though Bobby clearly weighed a good fifteen or twenty pounds more. Danny sat perched up in the air, all smiles—clearly happy to be the smaller of the two, since it put him in the higher position.
Sweet April Madison sat alone on the ground, playing with a doodlebug. And Charity, never one to rest on her laurels, made the rounds from child to child, demanding her turn on every piece of playground equipment. Shauna couldn’t help but understand the children’s frustration at the little girl.
I can’t focus on her flaws. I have to stay positive.
Shauna turned her attention to Ellen, who entered the playground alone. “Are you on a break?”
“Nope.” Ellen’s brow wrinkled as she spoke. “Mrs. Fritz sent me out to keep an eye on your class for you.”
“What do you mean?”
“She, uh, she wants to see you in her office.” Ellen gestured toward the door where Mrs. Fritz stood waiting.
“Did she say what she wanted?” Shauna whispered.
Ellen shook her head, and a sense of foreboding came over Shauna. She couldn’t help but wonder at the seriousness in Mrs. Fritz’s eyes. Rarely had she seen her with such a stern expression. What in the world did I do?
“Children, I’ll be back in a few minutes,” Shauna called out across the playground. “Mind Miss Ellen while I’m gone.” With a deep breath, she turned and made her way toward the back door. She followed along behind Mrs. Fritz toward the front office like an obedient puppy. They walked inside the tiny room, and the older woman closed the door with a click.
“I know you’re probably wondering why I’ve called you in here.” The director settled herself into the chair behind the desk.
“Yes.” Shauna could only manage the one word as she sat. Her nerves wouldn’t allow much more. The clicking of the clock on the wall distracted her momentarily. Or was that the sound of her heart beating in her ears? She couldn’t be quite sure. At any rate, she needed to stay focused.
“To be honest,” Mrs. Fritz said, “I’ve been a little disappointed in your work these past few day
s. You haven’t been yourself, and it shows.”
“Really?” Shauna let her imagination run wild for a moment. “I’ve been working harder than ever, and there haven’t been any unusual incidents with the children, so I’m not sure what you mean.”
“What I mean,” Mrs. Fritz gave her a thoughtful stare, “is that you haven’t been happy. You’ve come across as a little sharp-tempered and uncaring, and that’s out of character for you.”
“I have?” Shauna’s heart began to race. “I. . .”
“Some of the other teachers have noticed. And I’ve spent a little time observing you the past few days, as well.”
“You have?”
“Perhaps. . .perhaps I made a mistake by placing you with the two-year-olds.”
No mistaking her meaning there. “It is true that I’ve spent more time with the older ones, but I feel sure I can adapt what I learned in school. You said it yourself that first day—‘Children are children.’ ” Shauna felt tears well up.
“I’m concerned about your ability to connect with the little ones in your class.” Mrs. Fritz’s eyes narrowed a bit. “Just because you’ve studied children doesn’t mean you have a natural way with them. That has to come with time and opportunity. I’ve wanted to give you that opportunity.”
“Wanted to? Are you. . .are you firing me?” Tears spilled out onto her lashes now, and she brushed them away.
“Shauna. . .” Mrs. Fritz stood. “I don’t want to be hurtful, but I felt like I needed to say something. There’s no point in moving forward if you’re really unhappy.”
“I’m happy with everything except. . .” Shauna’s gaze shifted to the floor.
“Charity.” Mrs. Fritz spoke the child’s name softly, and tears tumbled down Shauna’s cheeks.
“Yes. Charity. I can’t get a handle on her. She doesn’t like me, and I can’t seem to get her to mind, no matter what I do. It’s not that I haven’t tried. I have. In fact, I lie in bed at night trying to think of ways to deal with her. I’ve tried everything. Absolutely everything. At least, everything I’ve been taught.”
Mrs. Fritz leaned back in her chair and pursed her lips before finally speaking. “Has it occurred to you that she senses your dislike?”
“Dislike?” For a moment, Shauna thought about arguing but settled back into her chair, overcome with shame. Lord, is that what it is? Do I really dislike her?
A scripture came to mind at once, one she could not ignore: Whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me. But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.
Regret washed over Shauna immediately.
Mrs. Fritz placed a gentle hand on Shauna’s shoulder. “Some things just take time. And I want to give you the time to fall in love with Charity. It will happen, trust me. I’ve had dozens of tough cases through the years, and there were times I thought I’d quit before working with some of those children again.”
“Really?” Shauna looked up in amazement. “You’re so great with all of the kids, even the hard ones. How did you do it?”
“It just takes time, honey. Pretty soon you’ll fall so in love with them that leaving each day will be painful.”
Was that possible? “I. . .I hope so.” Shauna sighed.
“I know so,” the older woman said with an encouraging nod. “And you’ll have to trust me when I say that I didn’t learn that in any university or classroom.”
Ouch. Shauna looked down at her hands as she spoke. “Please give me another chance with Charity. I’ll try harder. I will.”
“I spoke to her father this morning. Mr. Chapman wants to make sure his daughter is not singled out—that she receives the same love and care as all the other children.”
Shauna’s stomach flip-flopped at the mention of Kent’s name. Had he called to complain about her involvement? “If you give me time,” she said, “things will get better. I’m sure of it. You won’t be sorry.”
“I hope not, honey.” Mrs. Fritz gave her another concerned look. “That little girl has lost so much already. She needs all the love we can possibly pour out on her and more. We can’t take the place of her mother, but we can show her what loving women are like so that she can grow up to be one.”
Shauna’s heart wrenched. “You’re right.” She pressed away the lump in her throat. “I know you’re right. And from now on, I won’t just tolerate Charity. I’ll ask the Lord to give me a love for her.”
Mrs. Fritz gave her a warm smile then patted her on the shoulder. “Now that’s the kind of answer I was looking for. And don’t be ashamed of the fact that you have to ask Him to give you that love. Sometimes it doesn’t come naturally. One of these days, you’ll have your own children, and your love for them will be overwhelming. Natural. But in cases like these, sometimes love has to grow. I predict Charity will learn to love you, too.”
Shauna stood, and the older woman wrapped her in a warm embrace.
“It’s pretty amazing what a little love will do,” Mrs. Fritz said with a smile. “A little goes a long, long way.”
Shauna drew in a deep breath and stepped toward the door, prepared to begin a new phase in her journey.
***
Kent paced across the office, toying with the idea of telephoning Shauna. When his fractured nerves could take it no more, he picked up the telephone and punched in the number. Her phone rang four times before finally transitioning to the prerecorded message.
“I’m sorry I can’t come to the phone right now,” her cheery voice greeted him. “I’m probably hugging a child or teaching someone their ABCs. Leave a message, and I’ll get back to you during nap time or after school.”
With a lump in his throat, he left a raspy message. “Shauna. . .Shauna, this is Kent Chapman. I really need to talk to you. . .” His voice drifted off as he thought about what to say next. For some reason he couldn’t seem to think clearly. Her beautiful smile seemed to penetrate his heart, making words impossible. “I. . .I. . .Could you call me back? This isn’t really about Charity. I just wanted. . .needed to talk to you.”
He clicked off, feeling like an idiot—not just for the choppy message but also the call he had made earlier this morning to Mrs. Fritz. Had he made a mistake by telephoning the school’s director to offer critique? Had he come down too hard on Shauna? Maybe she just needed someone to help her understand Charity’s special situation—her need for female role models.
Kent couldn’t help but smile as he remembered Shauna on the night of their date. She had looked so happy to be with him—so carefree—and her eyes had twinkled merrily as they made their way into the restaurant.
Of course, there was that one part where she had commented on the unruly child. What was it she had said about parents allowing their children to get away with too much? And hadn’t she complained about her job that night, letting him know that her situation at work was nearing the unbearable point? Could she have been talking about his daughter, or were there other things to be factored into the equation?
He sighed, knowing in his heart that he had, at least in part, spoiled Charity. In so many ways, he had made allowances for her behavior because of her situation.
Perhaps more than made allowances. In his heart, Kent had to acknowledge that he had played a role in the development of his daughter’s poor habits.
I’ve given her everything she ever wanted. I’ve let her get away with far too much. I’ve allowed the temper tantrums to go on without really stopping to discipline. All because. . .
His thoughts shifted to Faith and tears stung his eyes. I’ll never know how Faith would have raised her. But I know what God is calling me to do. I have to raise her in the fear and admonition of the Lord. And if that means a little discipline. . .
So be it.
thirteen
Kent stood outside his mother’s bookstore, waiting for Shauna. His nerves were a jum
bled mess. They had been, ever since her phone call, agreeing to meet him. He fought to balance his feelings of guilt with his need to explain his daughter’s behavior. Lord, please give me the words to say. I don’t want to blow this. I really like Shauna.
I really like Shauna. For the first time, he found himself facing the truth of the matter. He liked Shauna. And he wanted Shauna to like—no, love—Charity. But he couldn’t make that happen. Only the Lord could manage such a seemingly impossible task.
When Shauna’s white Saturn pulled up, he walked to the driver’s side and opened the door for her.
She seemed a bit surprised at his gesture but greeted him with a quiet, “Hello.” Restrained. But he didn’t blame her.
“Hello to you, too. Glad you could make it.” Kent gave her a bright smile and led the way into the coffee shop at the back of the store. She followed behind in silence. He hoped to break it with the offer of something warm to drink. “Would you like some coffee?” He nodded toward the counter.
She gave a little shiver. “Yes. It’s really getting chilly out there.”
I sure hope it doesn’t get chilly in here. “Almost feels like fall, doesn’t it?”
Her lips curled up, the first hint at a smile. “I love our long summers, but I was happy to see that cold front come through. I was starting to think it would never happen.”
“If you could call it a cold front.” He chuckled. “In Houston, when it dips down into the sixties, we pull out our coats. I remember one winter it actually snowed about an inch. They let school out for the day.” He chuckled, remembering.
“I was in second grade that year.” Her face lit up. “We tried to build a snowman, but it melted before we could get it put together.”
“I was in sixth grade that year,” he said. “And you know what? We tried the snowman thing, too. Isn’t it weird to think we were probably building snowmen at the same time just a few miles apart from each other?” They stared at each other for a moment in silence.