“I like it when you call me that,” she murmurs as she takes an experimental lick. The feel of her soft, wet tongue on my head makes me want to scream, it feels so damn good.
“Then I’ll make sure to call you it more often. Princess.”
I hear her soft chuckle over the spray of water beating down on my back. I’m trying my best to block the flow from hitting her in the face by standing in front of it, but I find myself swaying on my feet, the water trickling down my chest. When I look down to make sure she’s still doing okay, her face is covered in droplets from the fine mist still getting by. She looks like a damn siren, her caramel eyes drugged with passion, her lips ruby red and swollen.
“Fuck, you look hot.”
“I could say the same about you.”
The husk in her voice is sexy as hell. My dick twitches in her hand, urging her to continue stroking. “Then say it,” I tell her. “Tell me how much you want me, how bad you want to taste my cock in your mouth.”
“I do,” she says, her voice growing breathless, her chest rising and falling harder as she leans in and sucks the tip between her lips. Just the tip, but I’m already ready to come. How does this woman get me so worked up so fast? She’s single-handedly ruining my run time.
“Then show me.”
She does. Boy, does she. Without any more prompting, Vista’s mouth engulfs me. She takes me all the way to the root. When I hit the back of her throat, I groan. Her mouth is magic. As she takes me deep over and over again, pumping my shaft in time with her mouth, I feel like I could scream from how good it feels. In a matter of minutes, pressure begins to build and I know I’m about to bust.
Then I think of the baby growing inside her. Shit! I can’t let my kid ingest that crap. What kind of father would I be if I let that happen?
Tunneling my fingers into her wet hair, I gently tug Vista back until I am free of her mouth. I’m sad as hell to go, but this isn’t cool.
“What’s wrong?” she asks, concerned as I hold my hand out and help her back to her feet. I notice that her movements are stiff, and I feel like a total asshole all over again. She shouldn’t be on her knees. She’s the mother of my kid and all I’m thinking about is myself.
“Nothing, princess,” I lie. Leaning down, I kiss her mouth, slipping my tongue inside and licking her until she relaxes into me. Drawing back, I brush wet hair from her face and look into her hooded eyes. Damn, she’s beautiful. “Let’s get you washed up. When I take you, I want you in a bed.”
Pouring body wash into my palm, I rub my hands together then smooth them over her skin, starting with her shoulders.
Leaning into my touch, Vista says, “A bed, huh? I thought you had a thing for having sex in the water.”
Working my way down, I cover her breasts, momentarily getting preoccupied with them as the nipples bead against my fingertips. “What makes you think that?”
“Hmm...the pond, the pool, now the shower.”
Thinking about it, I realize that every time we had sex, it took place in the water. Imagine that. “Huh, I guess I must like water sports,” I say, watching as my hand travels lower to the swell of her belly where our baby resides. “I don’t recall you complaining until now, though. Do you have something against mattresses?”
“Nope. They’re extremely forgiving, especially when you’re on your knees.”
Which I plan to be, very soon. My cock, which is still hard as a steel pipe, jumps at the mental picture of getting between her legs. I have a list of things I want to do to this woman, and most of them involve my mouth. What can I say? I’ve always preferred eating out.
“Let’s rinse you off, before I forget the bed and take you right here on the floor.”
“I wouldn’t be opposed to that.”
“Tell me that in two hours when your ass is bruised from the tiles.” As soon as we’re both soap-free, I dry off enough to ensure I won’t slip on the floor, then wrap Vista in a towel and carry her to bed.
***
“I told myself I wasn’t going to do that.”
“I gave you a chance to back out,” I remind her, my chest shaking with laughter. Why don’t girls believe me when I warn them?
“Not that!” Vista slaps my chest, laughing. “I meant the sex. I told myself I wasn’t going to have sex with you, and now look where we are.”
I stare up at the chipped and peeling ceiling that’s probably full of lead and asbestos, knowing exactly what she means and yet I’m a little hurt to hear that she didn’t want to be here with me. It’s a bit hypocritical, I know, but I never claimed to be perfect. I’ve wanted Vista for a long time. After Chicago, I can’t go back to a life without her in it. The sex is an added bonus that I’d just as soon not go without, either.
“I’m sorry I’m so irresistible. It’s my cross to bear.”
“Oh, shush,” she says, laughing again.
I love the sound of it. When I think about going back to my hotel—back on the road—alone, I suddenly feel empty inside.
“What are we going to do?” I ask her, not even bothering to elaborate because I know that she understands. It’s hard to miss the elephant in the room.
“Well,” she says, sobering. She nuzzles her cheek against my chest, getting comfortable. Or using the time to formulate a response. “I’ll start by calling the woman at the agency and telling her the deal is off.”
I nod, glad that I don’t have to get into another fight with her over it. I’d like to avoid yelling as much as possible for the remainder of my time here. “And then?”
“I don’t know.” Rolling onto her back, she stares up at the ceiling with me. The spot on my chest where her cheek rested feels cold without her there and I place my hand over it, but it does nothing to scare away the chill. “I guess I’ll just work. What are you going to do?” she asks, her hair rustling on the pillow as she turns her head to look at me.
“I’ll be heading back to my hotel tomorrow night to get ready for the game.”
“Oh.” I hear the disappointment in her voice and it probably makes me a son of a bitch, but I like it. I like knowing that she doesn’t want me to leave.
“You’re always welcome to come stay with me,” I offer. “I have plenty of room, and you could watch me play.”
She smiles, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. I know her answer before she says it. “Thanks, but I don’t know if that’s a good idea. My office just opened. I can’t leave it now.”
“What’s one day?” I ask, shocked by the almost desperate need to have her there, to see me do what I do best. I’ve never had anyone there just for me, who didn’t have an agenda other than making sure I won. I find myself wondering what it would feel like to have Vista there, cheering me on from the stands.
And what is it all worth, really, if I don’t have her there with me? Isn’t that the whole reason I came here in the first place, to get her back?
“Are you kidding me?” Vista is staring at me like she can’t believe what she’s hearing, and I totally get that. I can hardly believe me either. “It’s everything. I’m the boss. If I’m not here…”
“What? The whole place will fall to pieces?” I challenge. “Do you really think that will happen two days into it? You have other people working for you who know what they’re doing. I’m sure they could hold down the fort for one day.”
“Say I did go. Then what? Are you going to run off, travel the country, forget we exist? Go back to Chicago and settle in, commute for visits?”
Her questions hit me right between the eyes. I hadn’t thought that far ahead. I hadn’t thought coming here for her would result in planning an entire future. A family.
I look down, needing to be released from her intent gaze while I gather my thoughts, and my eyes fall on her stomach. It’s covered up by the blankets, hidden from view, but knowing what’s under there is enough to give me the answer I’m looking for. I’ve never been the kind of man anyone would venture to call father material, but now, with Vista lying b
eside me and my baby growing inside her, I feel like I could be. At the very least, I want the chance to try.
“I don’t know what comes next,” I admit. “But I can promise you that whatever happens, I’m all-in. I’ll make this work, whether it’s here or Chicago or someplace else. Just don’t write me off yet. Promise me that you’ll give me a chance to figure this out.”
Rubbing her forehead, Vista huffs. “Why should I? Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t draw the line right now and end this once and for all.”
Meeting her eyes, I feel my heart climb into my throat. It’s time to come clean. To lay everything straight so there will be no misunderstanding. “Because, princess. I risked everything when I came here for you.”
Her sharp inhale and the way she holds my gaze steady in hers leaves me feeling stripped bare. There is no hiding what I feel for this woman. Not anymore.
Drawing in a steady breath, I take the leap that could break me worse than any bone ever has. “I’m in love with you.”
22
This would be the time where I say I love him, too, but I can’t form any words. I’m in shock. That has to be it. Levi Black is in love? With me? But…he’s never even had a steady girlfriend. I can’t wrap my brain around it.
“Run that by me again,” I say, my voice nothing but a whisper.
Flipping onto his side, Levi faces me, his blue eyes focused on mine with an intensity that is flat-out scary. Especially on him. I’ve never known Levi to be serious about anything. Except soccer. And women. And having sex with women.
Reaching out, he takes my hand. Drawing patterns on the back of my fingers with one of his, he says, “I love you, Vista. That’s what I came here to tell you. Since the day you walked out that door, I’ve been working my way back to you.”
I...don’t know what to say. I can’t think. I can’t... Withdrawing my hand, I flip onto my back, and then toss back the blankets, setting my feet on the floor and reaching for my robe that hangs on one of the bedposts.
“Too much?”
Standing, I turn back to look at him. “Yeah, too much.” Way too much, too fast. It’s everything I’ve dreamed of hearing from the man I love, but…Of all the women he’s been with, why me? Who am I but a girl whose mom married his dad? How the hell have I possibly tamed this man when no one else has ever come close? It doesn’t make sense to me.
Levi’s frown runs deep, but it’s clear that it’s not going to deter him. Sitting up, he tells me, “It’s a lot to take in. I’m still getting used to it myself, but, Vista—princess—I swear it’s true. I know I’m the last person in the world you’d ever expect to fall in love with someone, but I love you. I do, and if you need me to take out an ad on a billboard or something to prove it, I will. I’ll call Vincent right now and he’ll get on it.”
I feel my own frown fall into place in response. “Who’s Vincent?”
“You met him once. The first day you came to stay with me.”
Who..? Oh, that guy. I feel my eyes widen at the memory. “The guy with the beard?”
“Yeah, that’s him,” Levi says, a smirk playing on his face as he scratches his nails over his own chin hair.
“I don’t think I like Vincent,” I tell him. Granted, it turned out to be an all-around bad evening and I could be projecting my anger toward Levi and his audacity to bring women back to the apartment against him, but anyone who runs with Levi is bound to fall under the same scrutiny.
Damn, does that mean that I fall under the same axe of judgment?
“You don’t know Vincent. He’s wild, but he’s a good guy, once you get to know him,” Levi defends.
Do I hear a story in there somewhere? I shake my head. This conversation is getting way off track, fast. “Levi, I don’t even know what to say to you right now.” Wait, yes I do. “Is this about the baby? Is that why you’re saying this? Professing your love? Because if you’re worried about making an honest woman of me or dodging the press coverage or something, I don’t want any part of it.”
“That’s not even close to the reason,” Levi insists as he shoves back the rest of the blankets and scoots toward me.
I can’t help it. He’s completely naked and now he’s completely exposed, too. A girl can only take so much. My gaze drops to his crotch. Damn, he’s seriously well-endowed. Like, seriously. I feel my cheeks begin to redden as his cock stiffens right before my eyes.
Placing his feet on the floor, Levi reaches out for me. I go to him, powerless to say no. With his arms locked loosely around my hips, he presses his lips to my stomach first before peering up at me through his thick black lashes. “I’d love you even if you weren’t having my baby,” he says sincerely. “I was already coming to tell you that before I even knew you were pregnant.”
Thinking back, I know he’s telling me the truth. He was shocked, seriously upset, and even went through a brief period of denial, and all before my eyes. There’s no faking that kind of reaction, so I have to believe him. Which makes this seem all the more unreal. Levi, the famous soccer player and infamous Lothario, is in love with me?
Sighing, I lean a little deeper into him, feeling his arms fasten tighter around me. “Assuming I’m in agreement here...how is this going to work, Levi?” I ask him as doubts begin creeping in. “You’re off traveling the country and I live here. Even when you do happen to be home, that’s still a hell of a commute. Not to mention the fallout when word gets out about us. Your dad is going to be crazy pissed.”
“Fuck my dad and fuck the media,” he replies fiercely. “I don’t give a shit about any of that. I told you before, this is our life. They don’t have any part of it except being voyeurs. So they can make all the judgments in the world, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to live by them. And neither should you.”
Standing, he rubs his palms down my arms, looking me straight in the eyes. “I’ve loved you for forever, Vista. Since the moment you walked into my life. There isn’t anything that anyone can say or do that would ever make that change. Can you say the same?”
Holding his gaze, I fumble for words. “I don’t know, Levi,” I answer honestly. “I’ve never dealt with anything like this before. I don’t know what I would do.”
“Then we’ll figure it out together.” Taking my hand, he begins leading me toward the bathroom. “Just know this,” he says as he cranks the water on. When his blue eyes meet mine, they’re swimming with laughter. “You can run, you can hide, but I’ll always follow. Always.”
“Well, that’s not creepy at all,” I joke. But in all seriousness, I hear what he’s telling me. Levi is willing to fight for what he wants. He’s willing to fight for me. It’s actually pretty romantic, and I can’t not be touched by that. I’ve never had a man care enough to follow me across the states to be with me. Even my own father ditched out on me before I was born.
Levi’s smile steals my breath as sure as if he’d kissed it out of me. That’s what this man does to me. Even if I wanted to deny the feelings I have for him, I’d never be able to deny how badly I want him. How badly I’ve always wanted him. It’s taken four years to come to terms with it, but now I know that, this time, I won’t be the one who walks away.
***
Levi hovered over me when I called Juliet, the adoption coordinator, and told her that I’d changed my mind. It was a long phone call that required a lot of patience and a hard heart. Juliet didn’t want me to go even though she was happy that I had changed my mind. Companies like hers have a personal stake in both parties’ outcome. In the end, she just wanted me to be sure and happy with my decision.
The only thing I can say that I regret is going to her in the first place.
It was a difficult decision to begin with, which should have told me what I already knew but refused to acknowledge: I was never meant to give up my child.
I know now that I would have regretted it for the rest of my life. Whether or not Levi is in the picture once our baby gets here, I know that I will do anything it takes to ma
ke sure this baby is happy and healthy. Anything.
I’m sitting in a patch of grass beneath filtered sunlight that falls through the tree canopy, leaning against a tree trunk with a giant root digging into my left butt cheek, while licking melting ice cream from the sides of the cone holding my large vanilla twist covered in colored sprinkles and a little set of candy eyes.
The day is turning out to be incredible. All I can think about is how I’m going to get to hold my baby in a few months. The idea of all the sugar and calories I’m packing away right now doesn’t even register because I am in heaven.
“I like how you work that cone, princess,” Levi comments while looking sidelong at me. He chose to eat his ice cream in a cup with a spoon, which is blasphemy as far as I’m concerned. It ruins the experience.
“I know a lot of tricks you might like,” I tell him, enjoying how his eyes light up with excitement. I actually have no idea what I’m talking about. I’m not very experienced in the sex department. Including Levi, I’ve only been with three men in my lifetime and with the exception of Levi, the sex was pretty straight forward. Needless to say, I’m in need of some instruction, but I have a feeling that Levi will be the perfect teacher.
“Wanna know what that ice cream reminds me of?”
I shake my head, grinning as I stick out my tongue to catch a rivulet of melted chocolate. “Don’t even say it.”
“What? I was just going to say that it reminded me of childhood memories,” he says, chuckling in a way that is one hundred percent devious.
I know damn well that’s not what he intended to say, but why encourage him? When we’re finished with our treat, we climb back onto Levi’s motorcycle. The day is too nice to go back home or spend it indoors, and Levi must be thinking the same thing, because he heads in the opposite direction.
It’s the scenic route. One that is filled with tree-lined country roads that go on for miles. Propping my chin on his shoulder, I close my eyes and smile to myself as the wind whips against my face.