“I want to sleep some more.” She didn’t want to be naked in front of him. She didn’t want to tempt him.
“No you don’t.” He drew the blankets away from her, ignoring her grip as he pulled them from her hands. “Come on now. Don’t fight me. Not right now, baby.”
His voice deepened, the muscle at his jaw working furiously as he stared down at her nakedness. Staring up at him in distress, Marly allowed him to draw her from the bed, barely hiding her gasp as her thighs protested every movement. She remembered the hard hands holding her, the driving thrusts inside her, and trembled at the memory. Too much. It had been too much pleasure, too many sensations piling inside her body with no ease, no time to assimilate them.
“I don’t want to bathe right now,” she protested as he picked her up in his arms and began to carry her to his bathroom. “I can bathe in my room, Cade.”
“This is your room now.” He set her down in front of the large sunken tub, swirling with steamy water.
Her eyes flew to his at his startling statement as he gathered her hair, twisting it expertly atop her head and anchoring it there with a thick clasp.
“No—” She shook her head in protest.
Cade’s lips quirked sensually at her instinctive reaction, and she watched the arousal that flared in his eyes. She shivered in reaction, her nipples hardening as his eyes flickered over them.
“Yes, Marly. My woman sleeps in my room, in my bed and bathes in my bath. It’s that simple,” he explained firmly.
“The others didn’t.” She shook her head, confusion running rife through her body.
“The others weren’t my women, Marly,” he told her gently. “I fucked them. They relieved an ache. That was it. I warned you what you were asking for. You can’t say I didn’t prepare you.”
The tender understanding in his voice brought tears to her eyes that she refused to shed. Her body throbbed for him, but she was terrified of the sensations he could build within it.
“Come on. Into the bath, then dinner. No more play for now, I promise. I know you hurt, Marly.” He reached out, his fingers caressing her cheek with a gentle touch.
He helped her into the bath, pushing her back until she was reclining against the back of the tub. The deliciously warm water washed over her sore body, and lapped at her swollen breasts. Her nipples were so hard they ached.
“You still want me.” He smiled down at her as his fingers caressed over one hard little point in a soft movement.
Marly closed her eyes on a whimper. She was so sensitive. Her body primed and ready, but her fears surrounding her.
“Sit and soak for a while.” He retreated from her, bringing a soft sigh of relief from her lips. “I used an extra dose of salts, and there’s relaxing oil in there as well. You’ll feel better when you get out.”
“I’m frightened, Cade.” She couldn’t stop the words. The fears.
He sighed roughly as he knelt beside the tub, leaning on the rim thoughtfully as he watched her.
“I know you are. I knew you would be.” He grimaced. “The fear will go away in time, Marly. That’s all I can tell you. I won’t let you go now. I can’t. There’s nothing we can do but get through this learning stage together, the best way we can.”
“I can’t take it again.” She shuddered, remembering the violent pleasure that racked her body. “It’s too much.”
“It’s not near enough,” he denied softly. “And you will take it baby, as soon as you’ve rested. Whenever I think you’re ready. And it never gets easier, but it does become less frightening. That’s all I can tell you.”
He caressed her cheek with his fingers, then leaned close and kissed her cheek with a light, reassuring touch.
“Your clothes will be laid out on the bed when you get out. Dress and come down to dinner. I’ll be waiting on you.”
There seemed a wealth of meaning in those last words, but Marly wasn’t able to decipher the message. She just prayed he didn’t mean what she was scared he did. She sighed roughly, sank to her shoulders in the water, and began to reconsider Cade as a lover.
Chapter Twenty
The clothes Cade had laid out would have been one of Marly’s choices if she was still intent on seducing him. Black silk thongs, a short black, stretching silk sheath that dipped low in the back, and skimmed the tops of her breasts in the front and made Marly feel like a million bucks. Smoky black thigh-highs and her favorite black heels completed the outfit. She looked like a dark angel when she finished, with her hair falling in long, riotous curls down the middle of her back.
She smoothed the dress over her hips, standing in front of the full-length mirror that had somehow made it from her room to Cade’s. She sighed; her clothes filled his closet as well, and his dresser. He had been busy while she slept. She wasn’t certain if she cared much for the high handedness he was displaying.
He was taking complete control of her now, and she didn’t much like it. It didn’t matter that he had warned her he would, she wasn’t a child to be ordered, nor was she so submissive she would willingly give him total control in everything. She shivered, remembering the control he had exerted over her in bed. She couldn’t fight that, and she knew it. For the first time since beginning her campaign to seduce him, she doubted herself. She wasn’t experienced enough to handle Cade, and she knew it.
“Stop worrying so much, Marly.” He had slipped into the bedroom quietly, and now stood watching her with that intent dark stare that made her stomach tighten spasmodically.
She swallowed deeply as he came toward her. He was dressed in jeans again, a smoky gray cotton shirt, and boots. And he was aroused. She closed her eyes as he came up behind her, pulling her hair away from her neck to deposit a kiss there. She shivered at the caress.
“You’re beautiful.” His gaze met hers in the mirror, and Marly barely contained a groan of pure sensation as his look traveled over her body. “Absolutely beautiful.”
His hands moved slowly down her bare arms, making her breathing escalate.
She couldn’t speak. She wanted to. She wanted to protest the sudden heat flaring in her stomach, the erection she could feel pressed against her back as he leaned close to her.
“Dinner’s ready. Marie cooked for us and left everything on the stove to serve ourselves before leaving. The boys are out for the evening and we’ll have the house to ourselves.” He watched her as he spoke, and Marly knew he was assessing her silence, her expression, everything.
“Where did they go?” Her breathing hitched in her throat when his lips began to caress her neck again and his hands gripped her hips, pulling her closer against him.
“Hm, who knows about those two?” Marly watched as his eyes closed, his mouth moving to the bend of neck and shoulder.
“Cade.” Her neck arched despite her own best intentions as his teeth nipped the skin there, sending heat rolling through her body.
“Shh, it’s just a kiss.” But he was breathing hard, and the hands at her hips were pressing her firmly into his thighs. “I promise, no play for a while.”
But his control was shaky at best, Marly thought. He wanted her again; she could see it in the wild swirl of color in his eyes as he glanced at her in the mirror.
“Come on.” He finally sighed roughly, moving away from her. “Dinner. Then maybe a movie. We haven’t watched a show together in forever, Marly.”
Marly felt dazed, confused. His voice smoothed out once again as he took her hand and led her from the bedroom. He was almost like the old Cade, gentle and non-threatening. Marly was well aware of the irony of the situation. She had wanted nothing more than his passion until she had it. Now, she still wanted it, but the extremity of it terrified her. Perhaps she should have paid attention to the warnings her friends had given her years before.
Cade escorted her from the room, his hand riding low on her back as they walked downstairs. The lights were low in the house tonight, the silence so pervasive that the hollow click of her heels on the hardwood fl
oor of the hallway was almost eerie.
“Are you going to ever speak to me again, Marly?” Cade finally asked her softly as he led her into the kitchen, and pulled her chair out at the table.
“I’m sorry.” She cleared her throat, fighting the huskiness in her voice.
“Here.” He poured her a glass of wine, setting it softly in front of her, then moved back to the stove.
Dinner was fresh grilled steak and shrimp, potatoes and greens with soft rolls on the side. The wine was smooth and slid easily down her throat, loosening the tension in her body as she sipped at it. As her glass emptied, Cade refilled it, all the while watching her as the silence wrapped around them.
“Finished?” he finally asked her as she pushed her half eaten meal away and sipped from the glass once again.
“Yes.” Her fingers played nervously with the stem of her glass.
Cade sighed, standing to his feet and carrying the plates to the sink as Marly sipped from her wine once again. She rarely drank, usually not caring much for the state it left her in. When her inhibitions loosened, she thought too much, wanted too much. But the nervous tension in her body was just as bad. She hated feeling this way, hated the hesitancy she now felt at wanting Cade. She loved him so much she ached from it, but he terrified her now.
“Come on, Marly.” He pulled her slowly from the chair, watching as she hastily retrieved her wine glass.
“Where are we going?” Damn that smoky sound in her voice, she thought. She didn’t want to sound sexy right now.
“To watch television.” She could hear the amusement in his voice.
“You’re laughing at me,” she whispered as he pushed her ahead of him, careful to keep his hand at her back in case she needed to be steadied.
“You’re nearly buzzing on two glasses of wine,” he said, and she could hear the smile in his voice. “I can assume this means there were no wild parties at school. You still aren’t used to alcohol.”
Marly frowned. He sounded tolerant. She hated it when he sounded tolerant and patient, as though she were still a teenager.
“I don’t like parties, you know that.” She shrugged as he led her into the family room and pulled her down on the couch beside him.
“I know you don’t, baby.” He pulled her against him as he flipped the television on and began scanning through the channels.
Marly took another drink of the wine, closing her eyes as she felt the alcohol slowly easing her terrible tension. When she opened them again, glancing at the television, she was surprised to see the latest action movie she had heard advertised. Thank God, he hadn’t chosen to watch one of the racier channels she knew the satellite carried.
“Stop being scared of me, Marly.” He lifted the empty glass from her hand and set it on the table beside the couch.
“I’m not scared.” She was terrified.
“Are you feeling better after the bath?” He changed the subject abruptly.
“Yes, thank you.” Her fingers laced together nervously.
“I didn’t mean to be so hard on you, Marly.” His hand smoothed her hair, his attention seemingly on the movie before them. “I lost control.”
Marly shrugged, not certain what to say.
She felt him sigh deeply, and knew when he turned his head he was watching her closely. He held her against his side, his large body sheltering, his arm wrapped around her shoulders so his fingers could play with the curls at the side of her head.
“Marly, look at me.” She shivered at the dark, rough quality of his voice.
She tipped her head back, staring up at him quietly.
“You said you heard about me and what I like sexually?” he asked her softly.
Marly nodded, thankful for the calming effects of the wine.
“Then you know I wouldn’t hurt you, don’t you?” he asked her gently, his other hand framing her face warmly as he watched her.
“Yes.” She licked her lips, a bit of her earlier nerves stealing over her. “You didn’t hurt me, Cade.”
“If you heard what I liked, then you know what it does to me when you fight me. When I know the pleasure is killing you and you deny me. Don’t do that, Marly. For both our sakes, because I don’t like scaring you.” He was watching her intently, staring down at her as he breathed roughly. “I can control myself until you do that.”
“It’s too much.” She trembled against him. “I can’t do it again, Cade. I can’t.”
She needed him to understand. She hated being frightened. She had never been frightened since Cade had removed the threat of Joe striking her again. He and Sam and Brock had done everything to make certain her life contained no fears. And now she was terrified.
“Trust me, Marly.” He kissed her forehead gently. “Trust me to guide you through it.”
She shook her head, then stilled as his eyes darkened. He smiled slowly, sexily.
“I can feel how much you want me, Marly,” he assured her. “I can see it in those hard little nipples poking through your dress, and I bet your panties are wet, even now.”
Marly shook at the sound of his voice.
“This movie is supposed to be good,” she stuttered out in a desperate attempt to draw his attention away from her. “I’ve been wanting to watch it, Cade.”
His gaze narrowed. Finally he sighed, moving his hand from her face and turning his attention back to the movie.
“By all means, let’s watch it then,” he said in resignation. “We can talk later.”
They watched the movie as tension swirled around them, keeping their senses heightened. Finally, Cade moved from her, walking to the built-in bar at the side of the room. He poured himself a drink, mixed another for Marly, then returned to his seat. Marly had shifted back a little, her legs tucked beside her on the couch as her head lay against the back of the couch.
“Here.” Cade handed her the glass, watching as she tasted it, then sipped comfortably.
The mix of soda, gin and whisky would go down smooth, and he hoped it would help to calm her nerves. She was riding on nerves and arousal, fighting both with her inexperienced fears. He had to calm those fears. If he didn’t, he knew she would never come willingly to his arms again. And he was dying for her. He remembered the tight, hot clasp of her vagina as though it had been seconds rather than hours ago that he had thrust into it. The slick, wet heat, the torturous grip on the sensitized flesh of his erection was more pleasure than he had ever known with another woman.
The movie was finally over. As the credits rolled he checked her glass, thankful it was empty. Taking it, he set it with her wine glass on the table beside him. Narrowing his eyes, he watched as the next movie came on. He wasn’t going to make it through the night, he thought miserably. He was so hard, so horny he could barely stand it.
“Why did you call me a whore in the barn, Cade?” Her voice was thoughtful, her question shocking. Cade’s cock jerked at the remembrance of her hot mouth wrapped around it.
He turned to her, angling his body into the corner of the couch so he could watch her expression.
“Frustration. Wanting you so badly it was tearing me apart with guilt, Marly.” He shook his head at his own ignorance that day. “You pushed me too far, and I reacted out of anger.”
“Why did you stop fighting it?” She raised her eyes to his, her head tilting as she studied him. “You gave in too easy.”
He watched her, a shadow of pain and anger in his eyes.
“There’s so much you don’t know,” he said, his voice so gentle, yet so filled with bitterness it brought tears to her eyes. “So many things I can’t tell you, Marly. I wanted to protect you. That was all. Just protect you.”
“From what, Cade?” Confusion whirled inside her brain. “What would be so bad that you have to protect me from it?”
He laid his head back on the couch, staring at the ceiling in silence as she watched him. He was so strong, so broad. He exuded quiet confidence and power. He made her feel soft, feminine, aroused.
/> “I love you,” he whispered, resignation filling his voice. “You don’t know how much.”
Marly’s heart sped up, pounding furiously in her breast.
“How do you love me?” She had to know. Had to know it was the same.
“I love you so much, I want to give you everything I am, Marly. Every part of me. Even the monster I’ve fought to keep hidden.” He looked down at her, somber, sad. “Does that frighten you, baby?”
She licked her lips nervously. She could tell it was supposed to.
“No.” She shook her head warily. “I want all of you, Cade. Everything.”
“The stories you heard about me sexually,” he said darkly. “How bad did they get?”
Marly swallowed, fighting past the sudden tightening in her throat as the buzz of distant conversations filtered through her head.
“Bad,” she finally whispered, then bit her lip as his eyes darkened.
“Tell me how bad, Marly. The worse thing you’ve ever heard. How bad was it? What was it?”
She had to fight for her breath.
“You, Brock and Cade.” She could barely push the words past her lips.
His hand tangled in her hair as he shifted, facing her now on the couch, his eyes staring down at her. There was no shock in his expression. Marly saw acceptance, and she felt the tremble that suddenly wracked his body. “You don’t do that.”
He broke eye contact, his gaze going to her shoulder as his hands slowly smoothed over her arms. Bleak. His eyes went so dark, shadows and pain churning in the stormy depths until she thought she would scream out at the torment reflected there
“Something happened to us, Marly. A long time ago.” He laid his finger on her lips as she began to ask what. “Please, God, don’t ask me, just listen to me. What happened doesn’t matter. Brock and Sam won’t tell you either. Suffice to say, it was bad enough that it scarred us. Made us different, Marly.” His eyes begged her to understand the impossible.
“Different? That goes beyond different, Cade,” she whispered, feeling the calloused tip of his finger against her lips.