Kitt laughs. "Titt? Great. Think we can put out a request to change it?"
"Oh, I'm going to."
"Read the shocking article," Coop says.
I flip the page, and my jaw drops. We've not been out in public yet. No one knows we're together, and I'm already fucking engaged to him.
"Quick work, Daniels," I say as I roll my eyes.
Dad looks over the article with a chilling silence.
What's going on inside his head?
"What are you going to do? I thought the plan was to keep it under wraps for as long as possible?" Milo asks.
"Ignore it," Dad says.
Everyone's eyes flick to him.
"Stories are in the paper every day. Ignore it until you're ready, and it'll die down."
He is determined to keep my life normal for as long as possible, and I'm all for it. Kitt and I will announce we're together soon, of course, but it makes sense to do it during a break in the tour. Hopefully, after that, things will die down, and we can get on with the second half of the tour.
I know what it's like to be mobbed on tour because something in your life has changed, and everyone has the right to know about it because you live in the spotlight.
Five years ago, Jimmy and Saskia suffered a tragic miscarriage, and the paparazzi were everywhere. It was the same when a girl claimed Will had forced himself on her. It was quickly proven that he hadn't. And again when Dad let it slip that he loved Jennifer. He'd meant as the mother of his child, but it was taken the wrong way.
Rubbish written by the pap is the reason my relationship with Xander was kept under wraps. It's the reason I want more time with Kitt without the media circus that is waiting in the wings.
"Tex?" Kitt says. "Is that what you want to do?"
I nod. "I think so. There's not long left until we get home, and--"
He leans over and plants a hard kiss on my mouth. "You don't have to explain. If that's how you want to handle this..." He folds the paper over, showing me that it's done and we're not going to give it another second of our time.
Dad smiles. "You've made the right decision. When we're home, I'll up security."
Can't wait.
"You ready for even more people in your house, Kitt?"
I have two reasons for asking this. Kitt needs to be prepared for the entourage my dad is going to have following me around. Kitt is used to Ted, but that's going to be upped. And my dad needs to know that I'll be over at Kitt's a lot.
He shrugs. "Doesn't bother me."
"It'd better not," Dad says. "Remember, I'm watching."
Cooper laughs. "One wrong move, and you're toast. And I can take centre stage."
I tilt my head. "You don't have the voice, Coop."
"My other qualities would more than make up for the fact that this pussy has a better voice." He looks down to his groin while jabbing his thumb towards Kitt.
"Gross," I mutter. "Are we anywhere near Stockholm yet?"
Milo snorts. "Tex, we left Norway five minutes ago."
"Then, can we chuck Cooper off?"
"Seconded," Jimmy says.
"You shits always pick on me, and you know why?"
We all wait.
"Because you're jealous," Cooper says.
Laughter drowns out the sound of the road.
"We certainly wouldn't want to be here without you, Coop," Dad says, slapping Cooper's back.
I blow him a kiss. "No, we love you and your delusions. Really."
On the table, my phone starts to flash with a notification, and then they come every few seconds. Oh, great.
"Looks like the article is out there," Kitt says, wrapping his arm around my waist, much like he did in the photo. "Ready for the crazy?"
I give him a look. "I'm always ready for the crazy, so bring it on."
The world can do its worst. We're stronger than anything they have up their sleeves.
KITT
FRIDAY, JUNE 5
STOCKHOLM, SWEDEN
Since the photo of Tex and I was released, the whole world has gone fucking crazy. How can people be so invested in the lives of strangers? But they are. Everyone is obsessed with us being a couple--whether they love or hate us. My critics say I'm not good enough, and Tex's critics say she's not.
It's a good thing we don't care what anyone else thinks.
Our Facebook and Twitter pages have exploded. There's something new online every minute, and it's the first question the paparazzi fire at us. They want confirmation, one way or another.
We've upped security for Tex now because the level of harassment is insane. It changed overnight, and I'm on edge every time she goes out in public.
It's been amazing for our record sales and catapulted the album up to number five in the charts, but I hate how much the extra attention is bothering Tex. It's shit like this, which is why Mark didn't want her with someone like me. I get it, too. Finally, I fully understand why he was against her being with someone in the spotlight. He wants to protect her as much as I do.
Mark spends his life trying to extinguish the media fire around Texas, and here I am, adding fuel to it. But I'm too much of a selfish bastard to let her go, not that either of us would allow someone else to influence our relationship.
Not even her dad.
The only people who know the truth are on tour with us, and they'd never talk. I think Peyton knows, too.
Mark has been watching me like a hawk, even more than before, judging how I'm dealing with the unwanted attention. He's not mentioned anything or given me any advice, so he either thinks I'm doing all right, or he's keeping his mouth closed and letting me work through it with Tex.
I feel like I'm on fucking trial. It's almost like he's waiting for me to screw up, and I'm downright petrified that, under his constant scrutiny, I will. It's a lot of pressure. I'm drowning under it, but I remind myself of what this is all for--Texas. My mind overworks, dreaming up every eventuality, and I stress over every little thing from a single line in a new song to being dropped by the label to Texas having enough.
Then, she smiles at me or says she loves me, and everything else turns to white noise.
"Anal?" Texas says, snapping me right out of my thoughts. We're sitting on the sofa together.
"What?" I blink. "What?"
"Ah, welcome back. No, by the way, to anal. I just wanted your attention. Tomorrow, you guys are on TV at seven a.m., so no partying tonight. I'll let you tell Coop."
"Thanks. Why seven? Couldn't you have booked it later?"
"Right, I control the breakfast show. Just because you're a rock star, Kitt, doesn't mean you get to make all the rules. Plus, I didn't book it. I, for sure, would have gotten it later because I'm the mug who has to try getting your hungover arses to places on time."
"You manage us better than Jodie."
"She's super busy with a much better artist."
I narrow my eyes, and she laughs.
"I'm joking. You guys are getting bigger, so I think she'll soon get someone else to manage you guys full-time. She needs to concentrate on her train-wreck singer. That chick needs an intervention."
Jodie's other client is pop star Elody Wild, who's been in the industry since she was fucking conceived. The meltdown was coming, and she did not disappoint. Elody's breakdown means that Jodie is unable to be here the whole time. But Jodie was only ever our temp manager.
It's a good thing Tex is here because there's no way we'd make appearances on our own.
"I'm glad she's not here. She'd only moan about the volume of alcohol entering our bodies."
Tex twists and sits on my lap, almost kneeing me in my most important area. "Should I scold you for that?" she rasps.
I run my hands up her thighs, and I'm about to take her mouth when the bus door opens. Gripping her waist, I launch her off me, and she lands on the sofa, staring at me like I've lost it.
"What the fuck, Kitt?" she snaps, whacking my arm, as Mark, Jimmy and Will walk into the room.
Mark is immediately suspicious of Texas's action. I laugh, trying desperately to make it look like a joke. I'm not really sure how to explain to him that his daughter was straddling me five seconds ago.
He's accepted our relationship--although I do think he's been a little too cool with it. We get no hassle, but it won't take much for him to freak out again, and I know Texas will always choose him. From the second she was born, she's been a daddy's girl. I'm close to my grandparents, but I had a closer version of a normal childhood. The way Mark and Texas live and what they've been through makes their relationship a little different. It's strong as fucking steel.
"Hey, Daddy. How'd the sound check go?" Texas asks, settling back into the sofa after realising why I threw her like she'd burned me. Her cheeks turn pink, and she looks to the left of Mark.
The girl is shit at lying.
"Speakers cool now?" I ask.
Mark nods, mouth tight. "All good."
"I'm fucking starving," Will says. "Jimmy, cook some bacon."
"Why do I have to cook?"
Will rolls his eyes. "Mark, cook the bacon."
"Jesus Christ!" Texas says, pushing herself up and stroking my hand as she goes. "I'll cook! Besides Will, you all suck anyway."
"May I remind you, master chef, that you burned toast?" Mark says, pointing at Tex.
She turns and narrows her eyes. "I was distracted. The toaster didn't pop up on time."
"Blame the toaster, Tex? Really?" I tease.
The look she gives me tells me that if her dad wasn't here right now, she'd be telling me that I'd be outta luck for sex tonight. Unlucky for her--and lucky for me--she could never stick to a threat like that.
"You wouldn't even know which end to put the bread in, Kitt, so I don't know why you're taking the piss."
"Have you ever thought that I pretend to be an awful cook, so I don't have to do it?"
She takes a minute before replying, "No. I think you're just horrible at it, but please feel free to cook us all some bacon and prove me wrong."
Fuck, she's got me. If I don't do it, she'll think she's won, and if I do it, she'll have food cooked for her and still win.
And from the cocky head tilt and pursed lips, she knows it, too.
She puts her hands on her hips. "Well?"
"Well, I'll sit right here and let you win while getting me meat." If I'm losing, I'm getting something out of it.
Out of the corner of my eye, I can see Mark watching us. He's intrigued, confused almost. He enjoys seeing how we interact because he can see that we're meant to be. But he's still watching.
"Fine. I'll make it. You're buying dinner anyway." She smiles and heads to the kitchen area.
"When have I not paid, Tex?"
"I'll treat you one day."
She bloody won't, but I don't want her to. I want to be the one who looks after her. And I will. Tex has a pretty strong personality, but I'm not backing down from that. She can kick and scream, but she's mine, and I'm taking care of her.
"Where's Milo and Cooper?" Will asks, flopping down beside me and throwing his hands behind his head.
"On the piss somewhere, I think. That, or screwing some chicks."
"Men are disgusting!" Texas shouts over her shoulder.
I watch Texas while she cooks. Her head is tilted to the side as she flips the bacon with one hand and looks at something on her phone with the other. She turns away, and I realise it's because she's reacting to something she's read.
Her shoulders slouch, and I'm on my feet. Something is up.
I walk over to her, stand close, and ask, "What's going on?"
"Last night, you cheated on me with this chick," she replies, shoving her phone in my face.
"Tex, no, I--"
"Don't," she says, ending my sentence. "I know it didn't happen. It's been twenty-four hours, and I can't count how many times one of us has cheated or there's been a new rumour. I can't keep up on any of my pages because they're being bombarded, and anytime I step outside this bus, people are there in crowds, waiting to fire questions and tell me how to live my life."
Shit. This never bothered her before, but like she said, it's been a day, and she can't keep up. She's already had enough. I can't wait to get this show over with, then we only have a quick stop in Finland before home.
"I'm sorry, baby."
She wraps her arms around my waist. "It's not your fault, Kitt. I need to stop looking so much. I'll ignore it. Doesn't matter what anyone else says anyway."
"You sure you're okay?"
Letting go, she gives me a playful shove. "I'm better than okay. I have you. Now, go sit down, and stop distracting me, or I'll never get this cooked to perfection."
I watch her for a second, looking for any signs of indecision.
There is none. She's still sure about us. She's still all in.
TEXAS
SATURDAY, JUNE 13
LONDON, ENGLAND
We're back in the UK for a week before going to America. I thought I'd feel less stressed here, but the storm surrounding our relationship is raging. It's pissing me off because I don't get stressed.
I'd just like to be a regular couple, even for a day.
Kitt is worried because I'm not as chipper as I usually am. I need to regroup and get my fuck it back. I need to hold my middle finger up and say, Sod it.
Easier said than done.
Kitt rolls over on my bed and throws his arm across my waist. That helps. "Are you really kicking me out?"
"Yep," I reply. "I don't want you to see me before I'm ready."
"That's a stupid idea. I like seeing you before you're ready."
Tonight, we're going to a red-carpet event, a movie premiere, and it's the first time Kitt and I will be together in public as a couple. It's time. Maybe once we've confirmed what everyone already knows, I'll do better with not caring.
While I'm with Kitt, I'll get more attention. It's always going to happen. So, maybe what I need to do is get used to how it is now. Is this how Peyton felt when she joined the cast, and things got crazy?
"Go, Kitt. Promise, I'll make it worth it later."
I watch the struggle in his eyes. He wants to stay, but he wants me to make it up to him.
"What will it be, Daniels?"
He kisses my forehead, rolls over, and catapults himself off the bed. "Until tonight," he calls over his shoulder.
I laugh and fall back against my bed. Thought so.
Time to get ready.
I'm torn. I want to be me because no one else can do it better, but I want to be what Kitt deserves.
Oh.
No, no.
What the hell is wrong with me?
Fuck the posh dresses. I'm going as me.
And if I ever think like that again, I'm going to stab myself in the head.
Shunning the long-length ball gowns, I slip on my deep red skater dress and black heels. I will be exactly who I am, and I don't care who doesn't like it. Let people say I'm not enough or that my clothes aren't red-carpet worthy. They don't matter. I have Kitt, and there will be alcohol.
I've grown up in the spotlight, but my dad sheltered me from much more than I realised until recently. Now, I'm jumping into it with both feet. There's no way I can keep as much privacy anymore, not since I'm with the heartthrob lead singer in one of the fastest rising bands.
"Damn it!" I snap, poking my hair in front of the mirror. I'm in the dress I want, but my hair is not going right.
Dad laughs from my doorway.
I frown at his reflection. "What's so funny?"
"You're stressing about your appearance, pumpkin. You're turning into a girl."
I glare at him and go back to the unruly mop on my head. "This is all your fault. Why did I have to get your stupid hair? Jennifer's hair is perfect all the time, and mine always looks like I've just woken up."
"You've never cared about your hair before, Texas. Why now?"
"Because it won't pin up properly!"
"And you thi
nk Kitt will care what your hair looks like?"
"No...but I do."
Dad walks into my room with a frown on his face. He pulls my hand away from my hair and gives it a squeeze. "If you care what the whole world thinks, I'll call a hairdresser in now. If you only care what you think, leave it alone."
"You're right," I reply. Sod the hair. It can be down. I give him a hug. "Thanks, Dad."
He hugs me back a little harder than usual and kisses my forehead. "Anytime. You look beautiful, by the way."
"Thank you. I don't really like the whole dress thing."
"There's my girl." He releases me with a smile. "I'm proud of you, Texas."
"Thank you. I'm proud of you, too. You're handling this Kitt thing a lot better than I thought. You even gave him a compliment there. He really wouldn't care what my hair is like."
"And I'll keep dealing with it just fine as long as he doesn't hurt you."
"He won't. This is more than what he had with other girls."
Lots and lots of other girls who I choose to forget about on a regular basis. A few pop up here and there to sell their kiss-and-tell stories, and those are the ones I feel sorry for. All they have of him is a memory and a couple hundred. Their time with him isn't even private anymore. I could never share anything that's just between us with the world, no matter what the price tag was.
"I understand that. I guess I've seen a lot of rock stars over the years. Each generation seems to...enjoy what the nature of the business has to offer more and more. I never wanted you to be a part of that."
"Never bloody will be. If Kitt didn't like me back, there was no way I would've let anything happen between us. I won't be Jennifer."
"Texas..." he warns.
"Whatever. You don't want me to be a teen knocked up by a touring rock star either. Good thing I'm not Jennifer, and Kitt's not you."
"I really wish I'd lied to you about your conception."
I grin. "But we have a no-lying-to-each-other rule."
A rule I have seriously pushed.
"Yes, we do. Remember that, Texas."
Oh, that's a warning. Whenever he asks a question about Kitt, he and I both know I'll have to give him a straight, honest answer.
"Kitt's here," I say as the front door opens and slams.
"I'm so glad I never took away his key," Dad says sarcastically.
"Play nice, please. He's important to me."
He groans and walks out, muttering something about hating me getting older. Clearly, he's still oblivious to the fact that I'm already older.