His fingertips burned against the flesh of her belly and thankfully he didn’t break their kiss or pull away. However he also didn’t go to her breasts. His hand curled around her waist and squeezed her in a way that had her sex weeping. His mouth ripped from hers and began to kiss her neck.
When his mouth latched onto the lobe of her ear and he sucked, his breath tickling and sending shivers racing down her spine and across her nipples, she moaned. “Oh my God, Colin.”
Teeth nipped at her neck and licked up to her jaw. Holy mother of God. Never before in her life had she felt like this. She rocked against him and loved the feel of his arousal bumping her sensitive clit. She finally understood so much about things that had always been a mystery to her before now.
Suddenly he stood to his full height and in one swift move he pulled her shirt off of her body as if he were skinning a rabbit. His eyes lit at the sight of her breasts and his breathing grew deeper. Watching him, although his gaze was on her chest, she sat up and unsnapped the center clasp at the front of her simple cotton bra. The cups sprung apart, but clung to the inner curve of each mound. His eyes widened in fascination as she leaned back onto her palms and waited for him to make the next move.
He glanced at her, then back to her breasts, then back to her face. She gave him a tilt of her head that told him it was his call. Slowly, reverently, he reached forward and nudged the cups away from her breasts exposing two tight brown nipples.
He audibly sucked in a breath and touched the underside of her breast with the back of his knuckle. “Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, Sammy, the more I see of you the more perfect you appear. God is surely testing me.”
She didn’t want him to talk about God now.
“Touch me, Colin. Please.”
He looked at her, a battle of emotions playing in his eyes.
“I’m not sure I know how. I’ve never done anything like this before. I knew it would only tempt me to read about it, so I’m sadly ignorant. I wouldn’t want to do something you didn’t like.”
“I’ll tell you if you do something I don’t like. Honesty, remember? Just do what you feel. What your instincts tell you is right.”
“I’m afraid I won’t ever want to stop touching you.”
God, that would be nice. “It doesn’t matter. We only have this time. Don’t make me wonder for the rest of my life what your touch would’ve been like. Please, Colin. I’ve never wanted like this before.”
He looked to the door as if checking to see if they were closed. When he seemed satisfied that no one would come barging in, he reached forward with both hands and gently pinched her nipples. Calloused fingers curved around the weight of each breast. She arched into his touch, wanting more, and moaned.
“Does that feel good?”
“Yes, hold me there, Colin.”
His large masculine hands cupped her soft skin. He held her heavy breasts in his palms and coasted his thumbs over her nipples. With each touch of his flesh over hers, her sex tightened. She wanted more.
As he played and experimented with different ways to touch and hold her there, she began to undulate and squirm. Her body was needy and she wanted to tear off his clothing and pull him down to her so his flesh pressed into her, forming pockets of heat in between them until they clung together and could only be peeled apart.
She eyed the bulge straining behind his zipper and knew he must be painfully aroused, yet he seemed completely unconcerned with his own comfort and satisfaction. The male organ had always intimidated her, but the thought of seeing Colin there, completely naked for her, was likely the most erotic thought she’d ever entertained. Samantha reached for him and his arm shot out and caught her wrist.
“No.” He looked terrified as if she were going to cut it off.
She had obviously gone too far.
“O-okay, Colin.”
She tried to retrieve her hand but he held it tight.
He looked at her with such desperation she didn’t understand what he wanted.
His voice was a rasp, a caress over her senses. “If you touch me it will all be over. I won’t be able to stop.”
Like a bucket of ice water, reality crashed over her once again. This was all they would ever have, satisfaction that ultimately left them unfulfilled. Her spine curled and her shoulders drew in to try and shelter herself while he still held her wrist. A sense of shame for being a fool knifed through her. He pulled her hand to his mouth and kissed the backs of her fingertips.
Did he want her to leave? Should she stop? She didn’t understand where he was at that moment and didn’t want to push him or make him feel guilty.
“What do you want, Colin?”
“All of you.”
He shut his eyes for a moment and released her wrist. When he opened them again his gaze locked with hers. His sapphire eyes turned a deep shade of emerald. She loved seeing them change like that.
“I want so much, Sammy, I don’t know how to hold it all in.”
She shook her head in sympathy. At what point did a sacrifice become worthless? How much more would he deny himself? There was a good possibility that this was all they would ever have, a few stolen kisses and secret moments of heavy petting.
“Then let some of it go, Colin. Let it out. You told me you were first a man before all else. Let yourself be a man.”
His eyes hardened as if she somehow offended him. He looked at her challengingly and she wasn’t sure what she said that triggered that reaction. She hadn’t meant to insult him or question his manhood. She only meant to repeat the words he’d said to her earlier that week.
He swallowed and stood a little taller, suddenly seeming bigger, greater, and more confident. The change was not subtle. As a matter of fact, it was so obvious she felt as though gentle Colin had suddenly left the building and a stranger now stood across from her.
Before she understood what he was doing he had her wrist again and tugged her down from the counter. The moment her feet hit the tile floor he spun her around to face the mirror. His hands glided down her arms and placed her palms on the edge of the counter. He gave her a little press as if that would keep them there.
“Don’t move.”
Perhaps she should’ve been worried about the change in his disposition, but she was too turned on and caught in the moment to process what she should and shouldn’t be feeling. He kicked her feet apart and her stance widened. Colin stepped close behind her and his length pressed against her back.
“You tell me if it’s no good, Sammy, and I’ll stop.”
She looked at him in the mirror, catching a glimpse of her own body braced before him, breasts full and swaying with tightly pulled tips, and nodded. His hands first touched her hips, massaging and feeling their way into a comfortable niche. Once he found his hold he tugged her against him with both hands. The clash of his body crashing against hers made her moan. She wanted him to do it again.
Soft lips found her shoulder and he kissed and nibbled her there. Her head lolled to the side and against his muscled chest. He continued to rub himself against her bottom as his hands slid over her hips and circled her belly. His mouth kissed a trail from one shoulder, across her back, and to the other then down her spine.
Sam’s knees quivered, ready to give out. Her panties were so wet the fabric buckled below her moist folds.
When he kissed his way back up her spine her body was so sensitized anything harder than a feather light caress would make her shatter. His hands glided up the front of her and cupped her breasts tightly, practically pressing them into her. The pressure was divine. He melded her to his form and held her body in place with his strong hands. She moaned, breathy and long. Strong fingers squeezed as he continued to kiss her neck.
His hands slowly released hers only to adjust so that his fingers could pinch and pluck at her nipples. Oddly, the firmer he grasped her sensitive tips, the more pleasure she derived from his touch. He rocked against her so much that her pelvis was now against the hard edge of the coun
ter. She shamelessly began to use the edge to create friction where she needed it.
When Colin realized what she was doing he yanked her back against his hips cutting off all contact with the counter aside from where her hands still held. His sea colored eyes shot her a reproving look in the mirror and then his hand reached between her legs and gripped her sex over her khaki shorts.
It was too much. Her legs crumbled, but he banded an arm around her ribs and held her up. His hand massaged over the crease of her shorts. When the curve of his hard fingers pressed against her wet panties, separating her, and rubbed against her hard needy clit she cried out. He bit down on her shoulder and sucked at her flesh as she came.
When her body finished climaxing she was a quivering mess. Colin kissed her gently and turned her to face him. He held her close and kissed her on the mouth until her equilibrium was somewhat restored. When they pulled apart she was still seeing stars.
He gazed at her through thick lashes and whispered, “I always want you to see me as a man first, Samantha. When I’m with you, I can shamelessly think of nothing else.”
* * * *
Sam waited in the kitchen for Colin and helped Maureen snap green beans for dinner. The woman never stopped. It was nice, sitting with her, idly chitchatting about everything and nothing at all.
“And what are you up to today, dear?”
“I was thinking about going to the lake,” Sam said as she tossed a few more snapped beans into a large faded plastic bowl.
“Oh, that should be nice. You didn’t want to go on the boat with the rest of them?”
“I’m not really a boat person.”
Maureen gave her a dubious smile and stage whispered, “Neither am I, but don’t tell Frank that. I much prefer to keep my feet on the land where my cheeks are rosy and not faded kelly-green.”
Sam chuckled and stifled her excitement when Colin walked into the room. His hair was wet from the shower he insisted he needed after their time in the bathroom earlier. He walked over to his mother and placed a smacking kiss on her cheek.
“Mum,” he greeted and she tapped two light smacks on his cheek before he could pull away.
“Yer awfully pleasant this morning, Colin dear.”
”And why shouldn’t I be? It’s a beautiful day and I’m off to the lake to relax and embrace the lazy days of summer.”
“Oh, Samantha’s heading there, too…” Her words faded off and she looked toward Colin. Sam thought she saw her fingers tremble as she continued to snap the beans. “Yer brother’ll be wantin’ to know where you’ve all gotten off to. I’ll be sure to let him know where you are when he returns.”
Sam looked at Colin, suddenly fearful that his mother had come to the true conclusion of what was happening between them. He didn’t notice her concern, or at least pretended not to.
He only smiled at his mother and said, “Good. I haven’t seen enough of Bray since I’ve been home. Tell him I said to come find us when he gets back.”
Maureen seemed to sag in relief, her shoulders deflating as some of the tension left her. “Of course, my dear. Now you two run along and have a good time. I’ll finish up here, Samantha.”
When they arrived at the lake all was quiet. Sam supposed that was the glory of owning your own private beach.
“Did your family make this lake or is it natural?”
“It’s man made, but not from us. We’ve expanded over the years. Our property line’s slowly grown and we’ve accumulated quite a few of other people’s plots. This belonged to our neighbors. They headed farther north and gave us first dibs at their spread. We’d always swum here as children so it just seemed right that we own it. Who knew if other buyers would’ve let us continue to swim here?” He placed their chairs on the sand and leaned in to kiss her quickly on the mouth.
She pulled away and looked around. “Colin, someone might see.”
“There’s nobody here, Sammy. It’s just us.”
“But you told your mom to tell Braydon to come down when he returned.”
“Yes, and if I know my father and the rest of them, that won’t be until dinner. You can relax. No one will sneak up on us.”
She relented and spread her towel over her chair. Colin took off his shirt and sat in the chair beside hers. He spread lotion over his arms and shoulders. She was so mesmerized by his body, she may have stopped breathing for a moment. Feeling suddenly brazen, she pulled off her own t-shirt and dropped it into the bag.
“You better make sure you put some block on. The sun’s—” He stuttered when he looked up at her and Sam fought a smile at having such an effect on him. She held her hand out for the lotion and he handed it to her as if he were a wooden puppet with only his arm tied to a string. “I didn’t expect you to own a suit like that.”
She laughed. “I don’t own anything like this,” she said looking down at the narrow blue patches held together with floss. “This is Sheilagh’s.”
“I have to have a talk with that girl.”
She looked up from rubbing lotion on her chest. “Why? You don’t like it?”
“I like it very much. On you. On my baby sister…not so much.”
“Well, that’s a double standard.”
“If you knew what I was thinking right now you would understand.”
She smiled and then let the topic drop as she applied block to her legs and feet. They sat for a couple hours just talking. Every once in a while they’d simply sit in silence. Colin’s hand would find hers and their fingers would link between the arms of their chairs. It was silly to get such a rush from such simple contact, but to Sam in was one of the most intimate experiences of her life.
When the sun became unbearably hot she considered suggesting they head back, but bit her tongue because she didn’t want the day to end. Once they were back at the house there’d be no holding hands or personal talk.
“Come on,” Colin said, standing from his chair. His skin glistened with perspiration.
She looked up at him and squinted. He was so tall his body faded into a silhouette blurring with the backdrop of the blazing white sun.
“Where are we going?”
“We’re going to walk down and put our feet in the water.”
* * * *
Colin looked down at Sammy shading her eyes from his view and hoped he was doing the right thing. He didn’t want to push her too fast or too hard. They’d been at the lake for quite a while so she had some time to adjust. He hoped she was ready to take this step.
“Just our toes, Sammy. You don’t even have to get your ankles wet.”
He followed her gaze toward the lake. It was calm, mirroring the trees and mountains like a second escape into a beautiful underground world. He waited.
He knew she was warring with herself and her fears as well as her desire to not let him down, but this wasn’t about him. This was about her letting go of the pain associated with losing her sister Meghan.
He glanced around to try to see the world the way she saw it. To him, the land was beautiful, breathtaking, serene, but to her it was likely frightening, powerful, and superior in an intimidating way.
He pointed to a scrubby patch of trees forming a hedgerow at the edge of the beach. “Let’s walk over to those trees and back.”
She followed his finger to where he pointed, actually having to turn her head in the opposite direction of the water because the trees were that far from the bank. He saw the moment her flaccid confidence grew into unthreatened surety.
“Okay.”
He helped her up. Her skin was warm and slightly pinker then when they first arrived. They strolled along the beach with slow steps and watched as their feet kicked up little grains of sand.
“What classes do you have to take when you go back?” He could have asked about her parents or something more personal, but he wanted to keep things general and loose, all thoughts away from the past.
“Classroom Management and I need three more credits in Spanish.”
&
nbsp; “You speak Spanish?”
She laughed. They were halfway to the grove. “Not really. I can decipher it enough to figure out the general message if it’s written down, but I’m awful at speaking it.”
“¿Y qué sucede cuando alguien habla español para usted?”
She stopped walking and grinned. “You speak Spanish?”
“Sí.” He reached for her hand, giving a soft tug for her to keep walking.
“Well, I have no idea what you just said.”
“Then you answered my question.”
Glancing sideways at him, she asked, “What did you say?”
“I asked if you could understand the language when someone speaks it aloud to you.”
She giggled. “No.”
They approached the thicket of trees and the sand became coarser with each step. He spotted a few bramble branches and burrs hidden in their path and decided they better not get any closer in bare feet. Colin casually turned them back toward the lake.
“What kind of stuff do you learn in Classroom Management?”
“Strategies and techniques for keeping students in line and not letting them run you out of the classroom.”
Colin tried to imagine Samantha in front of a schoolroom of young, boisterous teenagers. He couldn’t quite meld the soft image of her with a severe governess type persona he guessed she’d sometimes have to employ.
“Are you nervous?”
“Yes and no. I’ve already done my student teaching so a lot of my apprehension has been put to rest. I’m more concerned I won’t have time to find a job by September or not have the time to get my classroom together.”
They’d passed their chairs about twenty feet from the bank.
“Have you sent out resumes yet?”
“Yes. When you get a degree in education you have to keep a portfolio. It’s this big book of all your philosophies and samples and pictures from your experiences as well as all your transcripts. I have that done, which is good, because I actually have a few interviews lined up for July.”