After fighting back his impatience and rereading the page he was on three more times, he finally closed the book and stood up to stretch. Colin climbed the stairs quietly and entered his room, careful to lock the door behind him. Cutting through the bathroom, he found Sammy curled up under the soft covers and sleeping soundly in the dark.
Without hesitating, he slipped his arms under her body and scooped her up carrying her to his bed. She stirred when he placed her under his covers. Her eyes were soft slits fringed with dusty brown lashes that watched him intently.
Colin removed his shirt and jeans and stood before her in only his briefs and crucifix. She rolled to her back and smiled. Crisp white cotton panties rode low on her abdomen and accentuated her hips. A simple pink tank top covered her upper body, but he could see her nipples pebbling under the worn fabric.
He climbed in beside her.
“How’s your head?”
She giggled. “You know my head is fine.”
He kissed it anyway for good measure. “Are you still tired?”
She made a soft purring sound only a woman would know how to make. “Yes, but I’ll wake up.”
He pulled her to her side. “Don’t. I just want to hold you. We don’t need to talk.”
Her body snuggled in close to his and he reveled in the soft warmth of her in his arms. How would he ever sleep alone again without feeling like something was missing?
He watched her in the low light seeping from the bathroom. She was so incredibly attractive. There was not a bit of makeup marring her face. Her soft brown hair was natural and healthy. With his face so close to hers he could count every freckle that crested her nose and cheeks. They reminded him of sprinkled cinnamon, and he recalled a Natasha Bedingfield song.
He watched her until his eyes grew heavy and he no longer could keep them open. Pockets of warmth filled the hidden places between their curves. The last thing Colin thought before he drifted off to sleep was that he would probably die an old man and still recall exactly how she smelled and felt in his arms.
Colin’s mind roused when he heard a sound, but he didn’t open his eyes when he felt Samantha’s warm body still curled next to his. He pulled her close and nestled his face into the curve of her shoulder and breathed in the soft scent of her hair.
It was his brother’s voice that had him coming fully awake.
“Jesus fucking Christ,” Braydon hissed and both he and Samantha jolted upright wearing matching expressions of apprehension and guilt. “What the fuck’s going on here?”
“It’s not what it looks like, Braydon?” Colin said quickly blocking Sammy’s partially dressed form from his brother’s view.
She must have forgotten to lock her door.
“What the fuck is it then? Jesus Christ, are you fucking my girlfriend?”
Before Colin realized what he was doing he was out of bed and grabbing Braydon by his shirt.
“Show some respect!” he seethed, giving him a hard shake. “I told you it isn’t what it looks like.”
“Then what is it, Colin? Because to me it looks like my girlfriend’s in bed with my brother who is about to become a priest!”
Colin loosened his hold of Braydon’s shirt and stepped back. “We aren’t sleeping together,” he admitted quietly. “Sammy’s a virgin and so am I.”
The personal detail about Samantha’s virginity seemed to shock his brother, but he quickly recovered and Braydon’s look of surprise returned to a scowl.
Colin looked back to the bed to check on Sammy. She was sitting up and appeared extremely uncomfortable with the situation. Her cheeks were crimson red as she averted her gaze and clutched the covers to her chest.
“Is this what you’ve been doing? Why you haven’t wanted to spend any time with me?”
Colin was about to answer, but realized his brother was addressing Samantha. She looked at him and anger glinted in her dark eyes. “Don’t act like I’ve been neglecting you any more than you’ve neglected me, Braydon. Since the moment we arrived you had no apprehension about leaving me to entertain myself.”
He scoffed. “That’s not true.” Braydon’s posture turned defensive. “I invited you tubing, to swim in the falls, fishing. You’re the one who refused to spend time with me.”
She looked away and Colin softly confessed, “She’s terrified of water, Bray. She can’t do those things.”
Braydon looked as though that was the most ridiculous excuse in the world. “Well, you could’ve told me that.”
Sammy scowled at his brother with big eyes, her lips firmly pressed together in irritation. “Would it really have mattered, Braydon? Be realistic. You regretted asking me to come the morning after we arrived. I love it here, but all I’m doing is interfering in your free time. We enjoy different things.”
Braydon looked at her, his expression appearing vulnerable and unsure. Both characteristics Colin did not normally see on his sought after brother’s face.
“That’s not true,” Bray whispered. “I like you, Sam. We’re good together. I didn’t know about the water thing. I’ll stay away from the lake for the rest of the week.”
Thankfully Samantha halted him from making more unrealistic promises.
“No, Braydon. I like you too, but as a friend. I know what you’re looking for and I’m not it.”
His brother appeared bewildered by her rejection. Braydon had always been the golden child of the McCulloughs, the one chased after by every beautiful girl in the county. It wasn’t often he was turned away.
“I’m sorry,” Samantha whispered.
When Braydon raised his head all vulnerability was safely hidden away. He glared at Colin. “Is this because of you? Are you even taking your vows now?”
“Braydon, don’t say something you’ll regret,” Colin suggested. “This isn’t personal. It isn’t about you—”
He gave a sardonic laugh. “You think? She was my guest, Colin, and of all people I never thought I had to watch my back around my brothers, let alone you.”
The accusation stung, but Colin took it. “I’m sorry. Please don’t make Sammy feel bad about it though. I take full responsibility.”
Bray let out a dry, low laugh. “Sammy is it?” He shook his head as if still struggling to believe what he’d walked in on. “Well, you two enjoy each other. I’ll be sure to stay out of your way. I wouldn’t want to ever be accused of poaching from my own family.”
Shit. This was really bad. If anything his family was always loyal to one another. Before Braydon could leave Colin reached for his arm, “Bray…”
He stopped, but didn’t look at him.
“I need to know you won’t say anything to the others. Samantha’s going back to school at the end of the week and come August I will be making the sacrament of holy orders. Nothing’s changed.”
“For you,” he said under his breath.
“Please, Braydon. She doesn’t deserve to be dragged into the middle of all this in front of a family she’s just met. I understand that you’re angry at me. Be angry for as long as you need, but don’t hurt her in the process.”
Braydon looked up at him with such a penetrating stare Colin feared he could see right through him and see how he truly felt about Samantha.
“If anyone hurts her, Colin, it won’t be me.”
Chapter Thirteen
True to his word, Braydon did not breathe a word about what he had seen. While the morning after he struggled with looking Samantha in the eye, the tension quickly faded and he was once again acting as her friend. There was still, however, tension between him and Colin.
The days passed faster than Sam was prepared for. In the mornings she would usually spend time with Maureen and sometimes the aunts and Katherine, while Colin went to the Church to work on painting the school or other things that needed tending. They found it easiest to stick with the rest of the family in the afternoons, and in the evenings they had fallen into the routine of sneaking off to the lake to see how far Colin could distract Sa
m into the water.
She had made it up to her ribs and Colin was immeasurably proud of her.
The water became less of a fear and more of a need to please him, to show him that she could handle anything. She craved that look of pride he showed with each little bit of progress she made. Her apprehension of even being near the lake had faded in ways she couldn’t process. On Wednesday they had been so elated at her progress they could barely keep their hands off each other.
There was something sacred about their time at the water, something that was theirs and could never be shared. It was her memory, her secret kiss tucked neatly in the corner of her smile that no one else could ever lay claim to. With each passing night she fell more and more in love with Colin McCullough and her fear of the coming Saturday became more paralyzing than all thoughts of water.
Thursday night came and they waded into the lake, its silver moon shadows sparkling like tiny diamonds along the surface. Colin held her securely by her hips and walked backward, holding her with her back to the shore until the ground fell away and she floated in his arms. It was a terrifying and euphoric feeling wrapped into one.
He instructed her how to move her arms and legs to bob in place. Only the mildest panic crept in when small spatters of water crested her shoulders and splashed her face. He held her and whispered words of encouragement and her anxiety faded. It was surprisingly peaceful, floating with her shoulders under the warmth of the water. When her legs grew tired she wrapped them around Colin’s hips.
His laughter slowed and he looked at her with such a serious expression. His blue-green eyes looked almost golden in the darkness.
“I love you, Samantha.”
“I love you too, Colin.”
They kissed in the water for a long while, their bodies heating and coiling with each breathless moment. His arousal pressed so close to her center she felt naked. She wanted to pull her suit aside and touch him to her, flesh to flesh.
She broke away from their kiss and breathed, “Colin, let me touch you. Please, I want to feel you.”
He pressed his forehead to hers. She knew he wanted to say yes, but there was still that part of him that wouldn’t give in.
“What do you need, Samantha?”
“You. I need you inside of me.”
His hand coasted over her hip and his fingertips grazed the soft patch of skin between her belly button and bikini bottom. Slowly, his hand moved lower. She let her body become buoyant, loosely wrapping her legs around his hips, and keeping her hands where they held her at his shoulders.
Fingers trailed down the front of her bikini and pressed lightly into the crease of her sex. He moved his fingers slowly up and down over the fabric as if orienting himself with her shape.
“I’ve never touched a woman here.”
She looked at him but said nothing, simply waited to see what he would do, hoping he would truly touch her. After a few moments of him petting her there, a hollow ache built inside of her, screaming to be filled. What had always been simply anatomy was now an empty void connected to every nerve of her body, every muscle, to her mind, and most of all, to her heart. She was a puzzle piece missing its complimenting half. Colin’s half.
When his fingers breached the cool wet fabric of her suit and teased at the soft patch of hair the material hid, Samantha struggled to remain still in his arms. She began to panic when his fingers pulled back up before ever making contact with her sex, but then relaxed when she realized what he was doing.
His fingertips rode the inner hem of her suit like a track until they came up to the knot tied at her hip. Her heart raced as his fingers tugged the soft string causing the bow to come loose.
The two strings fell away from her hip and Colin pulled the front away from her body until her sex was bared for his touch. The forgotten suit wrapped one thigh. He looked into her eyes, and his fingers coasted toward her folds.
They feathered back and forth there for a moment, building her anticipation to a fever pitch. He was unintentionally teasing her and she never wanted it to stop, yet at the same time she wanted to scream at him to do more. Finally his fingers fell away and his palm cupped her wanting core.
Samantha’s eyes rolled back and a guttural groan left her throat. Colin was breathing so hard his shoulders seemed to inflate with each breath. Her eyes shut, but she could feel him watching her. The broad tip of his middle finger separated her folds and she begged him to keep going. He breached her opening and slid in to the third knuckle, his other fingers still cupping her from the outside.
The sensation was incredible. Right. Her body lifted, the water easing her movements and keeping her almost weightless. His left arm wrapped around her lower back as she continued to lift her body up and down shamelessly upon his hand.
“What does it feel like, Samantha?” His voice was a mere whisper falling in between her labored breaths and the slight sloshing of the water against their skin.
“Good. It feels so good, Colin.”
He pressed the heel of his palm against her clitoris and she purred deep within her throat.
“There?” he asked.
“Yes.”
He continued to rub as she rode his finger. He turned his wrist slightly and another finger trailed along her labia.
“Can you take more?”
“Yes.”
The other finger slipped inside, lining up beside the other. The fullness was splendid. She became disoriented by the sensuality of it all. Pulling herself up by his shoulders, she pressed her face into his neck making throaty sounds of pleasure.
He dragged his fingers out and slowly glided them back in. Her body opened for him the more he slid his fingers in and out. Her channel became as slick as her skin that was fully submerged in the water.
Colin increased his rhythm and touched an extremely sensitive spot deep inside of her that made her hiss.
He stilled. “Sorry.”
“No, it’s good. Don’t stop.”
He pressed again, finding that soft place hidden deep within her sex. She could tell the tissue there was softer, slightly more tender and sensitive than the other parts of her sex. Whatever it was, Samantha wanted Colin to never stop touching it.
A third finger played at her opening but didn’t quite fit with the others. The more he reached for that spot inside of her, the closer his thumb came to her clitoris. His motions grew more confident that he wouldn’t hurt her and pumped his fingers in and out of her sex with a little more force and speed.
When his thumb pressed directly on her sensitive bud, she cried out. He understood this was one of the most sensitive places on her body. He tried touching her there a few different ways, but couldn’t seem to keep any sort of rhythm with his thumb while his fingers pumped in and out of her.
Finally he grunted and shoved his fingers deep into her sex. They found that soft inner spot and pressed into it. His thumb then clamped down on her clit and rapidly strummed her. His touch caressed her most sensitive flesh both inside and out. She heard her voice echo around them as she came and cried out his name. Her body tensed and locked so tightly around him her abdomen lifted out of the water.
As her locked muscles unraveled and she came back to earth Colin suddenly began to pound his fingers in and out of her once more.
“Again,” he grunted, holding her tightly to his hip.
She looked at him about to tell him she couldn’t possibly when another climax tore over her like a tsunami washing all doubt out of its path. The inner walls of her sex fluttered and pulsed around his fingertips, as there was a heavy release of moisture from within her.
Her entire body shook as he cupped her weeping sex, his touch remained tucked deep inside of her. She was tired and disoriented. In that moment she would be incapable of even spelling her name. The only thing she was sure of was that she loved this man and letting him go would be the hardest thing she’d probably ever have to do.
Colin kissed up her neck and found her mouth. He seemed torn betw
een wanting to kiss her thoroughly and wanting to whisper words of love to her.
His mouth opened and closed over hers. “So beautiful.” He licked at her bottom lip. “So soft.” He nibbled along her jaw. “Never have I seen something so breathtaking as you letting go.” His mouth sealed over hers and his tongue stabbed past her lips. He devoured her mouth and sent her senses spiraling once more. She became a body without bones.
When his fingers stirred within her she moaned tiredly. “Give me one more, Samantha. I know you can take it. Let me feel you one more time.”
She didn’t stop him from touching her, but she couldn’t seem to muster any more enthusiasm. She was rung out, spent, completely and totally sated. Her body jerked when his thumb coasted over her clit. She was so incredibly sensitive there. Pleasure became almost painful to endure.
Suddenly his fingers slipped out of her, causing her to feel incomplete and bereft, then they were moving toward the shore. Her body shivered as he carried her to shallow ground and the coarse sand pressed into her back. Colin’s weight settled on top of her.
He kissed her lips, her neck, the curve of her breasts. The sopping inconsequential weight of her bikini bottom wrapped around her knee vaguely registered.
“I can’t stop yet. Forgive me, Sammy, I can’t let you go just yet.”
She exerted too much energy in order to lift a hand to the side of his face. He raised his head from where he was kissing her stomach and gazed at her. So much pain and anguish and need in those deep ocean colored eyes. Her mouth was dry and her eyes could barely stay open, but she managed to form words. “S’okay, Colin. I’m yours.”
His shoulders dropped as if hearing her acceptance was an enormous relief. He laid his cheek upon her belly and whispered, “I love you.” She was too tired to say it back.
Slowly he scattered kisses across her skin, upon her belly, down her thighs, at the backs of her knees. She lay supine beneath him allowing him to touch her freely as he pleased.