Robin forced the thought out of her head as she got her purse out of the locker. Not that she could go anywhere since they’d driven over together. She was shaken and sat down heavily on the ragged black leather couch. She dug through her purse and located the joint that she had brought. The area was empty now that open mic was over so when she heard footsteps coming down the stairs she presumed that it was the club owner. She didn’t bother to hide the joint, he was the one that sold to them.
But surprised, she saw that it was Jason that had come down the back stairs. She stared at him in shock. He was walking, leaning heavily on a cane, but he had come down the stairs with absolutely no trouble! She straightened up from her slouched position on the couch, but refused to put out the joint. She couldn’t take her eyes from him.
He was a giant! But her memories of him were mostly of him in a wheelchair. He looked more like a football player than ever! His muscle movements had steadied though not completely disappeared. When his head and neck did move, his hair tended to obscure his face. It hadn’t been like that before, he had kept his hair out of his eyes, now it shielded his face.
“Robin.”
Robin looked away, his voice causing some string to be plucked within her body, and the resulting reverb shook her.
“What are you doing down here? This is for performers only.” Fucking weed! Why was that the first thing out of her mouth upon seeing her ex-boyfriend; her first boyfriend…her first love??
“To tell you how good your band played…how good you sounded.”
With her eyes still averted she put the joint back into her mouth and took a draw. She exhaled slowly before looking at him. He was just watching her with steady eyes. Looking in his eyes was like looking into the face of the sun. She couldn’t do it. Instead she stood up and paced a bit.
She took in a shaky breath, not knowing what to say and then just said the first thing to come to mind. “So you got the pump thing?” She couldn’t remember the name for it.
“Yeah. I’m back on the Baclofen pump. I’ve had it since January.”
His voice even sounded different. It was slurred but he didn’t take the deep breaths between words and his mouth didn’t jerk causing his words to change in mid speech.
“I’ve wanted to talk to you.”
Robin’s full lips formed into a sullen line. Then she forced herself to look at him, knowing that he could clearly read the expression of disdain on her face. Good. Her expression clearly stated that this was not a reconciliation. This was him in her personal space.
“About what?”
There was a heartbeat before his response. “About a contract.”
“Um…what?”
Jason looked around the room. He moved to peer at things; pieces of junk that the club owner had stowed there, or things that people had left behind. He looked at her again.
“I used your voice in a song. I need your written consent to use it on my album.”
Album? Whose album was he referring to? His own or that guy back in Japan’s? She asked the question.
“My album. Akita’s album already dropped and it’s a hit. Now they want me and Link to do our own album. But I would like to put…Love’s End on it.”
Robin’s eyes closed. She remembered the haunting lyrics, ‘I don’t love you anymore…’
“That’s fine.” She looked down at the joint in her hand and then put it out. “I told you it was yours to do with as you please.” She looked around for paper. “What? Do you need me to write it down--my consent on something-”
“No. There’s a contract; royalties all of that kind of stuff.”
Royalties! Her brow knit and then she heard more footsteps rushing down the backstage stairs. Tracy suddenly appeared, scowling at her.
“You and your stomach, Robin! Were you vomiting blood again?” Then she spotted Jason and her footsteps faltered. Becca almost ran into the back of her.
“Who’s this?” The raven haired beauty asked with interest.
Robin’s face was heated from Tracy’s earlier words about her bloody vomit. She gestured to Jason who was watching them silently.
“Um, this is Jason.” She gestured to the girls. “This is Tracy and Becca.” Jason shook their hands before he turned his attention back to Robin.
“Robin, can we go somewhere to talk?”
Her body bristled. “No. I…rode with the girls and…”
“We’ll give you a ride home.” Jason spoke.
“We?”
“Peter, Belinda and I rode together.” She thought about that huge van that Peter drove with the flames on it. He had been so strange and so sweet...
The girls were putting away their guitars, stowing them into the locker. “We’re going to hang out for a while; dance and have some drinks.” Becca said. “Go ahead if you want.”
Tracy hurried back up the stairs to engage in the dancing/drinking ritual that was a part of their after performance routine. Becca lingered curiously, wanting to know who Jason was. Based on Robin’s discomfort, he was evidently someone that had made a big impact on her mysterious life.
“Just let us know what you’re going to do.” And then she too disappeared up the stairs.
The marijuana was working on her now so she shrugged. “Well what else did you want to talk about?”
The corners of Jason’s lips rose slightly. “You, of course. And I have to tell you that Belinda and Peter are going crazy up there wanting to talk to you.”
Robin’s blank expression hid the evilness behind her next words. “And what about Amberly? Is she going crazy wanting to talk to me, too?”
If Jason was surprised by her words, he didn’t show it. “She’s not here.” He turned and headed up the stairs. He paused to look at her over his shoulder when he didn’t hear her following. “Come on. They can’t wait to talk to you.”
Robin followed. Fine, let’s do this. It was about time that she came full circle. She didn’t want these people in her life and after tonight they’d know it.
***
Robin followed Jason through the crowded dance floor. Several people gave her a pat on the shoulder or told her how good she had sounded and she always responded graciously despite the anger that was brewing in her belly for Jason and his friends. She tugged his sleeve and when he turned to look at her she pointed to the bar and veered there. She would need a drink for this.
“Gin and tonic.” She said to the bartender. Jason was right beside her and he pulled out his wallet and paid for it. She didn’t argue and when she had her drink this time she led the way back to the table with most of the members of that old group Wheels of Steel.
Belinda jumped up happily and threw her arms around her in a loving hug. Robin bristled but placed her hand on Belinda’s back and waited for her to break the contact. If Belinda noticed her cold reception she didn’t acknowledge it. When she pulled back her face was etched with joy.
“You look really good Robin!” But it was Belinda that had really made a big change. She had slimmed down, yet still retained her curves. Her hair had grown out but had been professionally styled with stark straight bangs and fluffy curls. It was now a fiery auburn. Her Goth influence was still present in her black turtleneck and black skirt with black clunky heels. Standing there towering before her, Belinda appeared every bit the giant that Jason was.
Peter had a huge grin plastered on his face but his eyes were a bit more cautious as he studied her. She could see him taking in everything, including the drink in her hand.
“You do look great Robin. And the way you wailed up there on that stage was fucking phenomenal!” Peter was still the blonde haired blue eyed surfer boy that would make a women look at him three times before they could walk away. But unlike Jason, he had not left behind his wheelchair.
Robin nodded once and sat down. They stared at her happily as if she was the second coming of Christ. She took a sip of her drink noting that it was already half gone. Shit, she should have gotten two.
“You’re in a girl’s band!” Belinda exclaimed.
“I’m in a girl’s band.” She confirmed and as the alcohol and weed began to work on her system, Robin’s body relaxed and her brain retreated into auto pilot. “I go to college now. I’m a full time student so I don’t work. I…hmmm, sing in a band. And I guess there’s not much more to say about me.”
“What are you studying?” Peter asked.
“Healthcare and wellness. I’m studying to be a rehabilitation specialist—focusing primarily on children.”
“You’ll be good at that.” Jason said softly.
“What?” She asked loudly even though she had heard him clearly.
“That’s the perfect profession for you, Robin. You’re a great caregiver.”
“Well I don’t do that anymore.” She turned her attention away from Jason and back to Peter.
“You’re making an album I hear. So your trip to Japan was a success.”
“It was. We evolved some while working with Tom. Same influences but now we’re more polished. I got a DVD of it in the car if you want to hear it. It’s got great reviews. It’s probably playing somewhere on internet radio as we speak.”
“Cha-CHING!” Robin said, making the sound of a cash register.
Peter laughed. “Exactly.”
Belinda placed her hand on the table, a gleam in her eyes. Robin looked at her hand, and then her eyes locked onto the sight of the ruby and diamond stones that were embedded in the ring on her finger. Robin glanced at Peter who was beaming proudly.
“We’re engaged.” Belinda exclaimed.
“Wow, good for you.” Their engagement had the opposite effect intended. It didn’t make her happy for them, it made her sad for herself. But sadness was the last thing she wanted. She tossed back the last of her drink.
“How’s your ulcer?” Peter asked.
She shrugged. “I got it fixed.” She lied.
“Do you want another?” Jason asked.
“Yes.” He made to rise and she stared at him with a gathered brow. “You’re not 21. As a matter of fact, how in the hell did you get in here? You’re still 19.”
“Just for a few more days. Besides, unofficially, I’ve been 21 for the last 3 years.” He disappeared into the crowd.
When he was gone Belinda leaned forward. “We missed you so fucking much, Robin. You have no idea. And for everything that I did I’m so sorry.” Robin’s eyes narrowed, her mouth forming an unfriendly line in her brown face.
Peter watched her carefully. “That goes both ways, Sweetheart. I’m really sorry for what happened that last night. We were both wrong. I was wrong.”
“That was a fucked up time.” Belinda said after a brief pause. “And I was a fucked up individual. But I’m more sorry then you know. After you were gone-”
Robin held up her hand to halt them. “Okay!” Belinda quieted. “I get the point. I’m over it.”
“I can tell you that Jason hasn’t stopped thinking about you-” Belinda began again.
Robin chuckled. “And here comes the real reason that you wanted to talk to me. What are you two, his freaking minion?!” The smile dropped from their faces. “Is every fucking thing in your universe centered around Jason?!” Belinda’s mouth snapped shut in surprise.
Robin leaned forward. “You want to talk to me? How about we really get caught up? We can just cut through the chase and get honest-to-goodness caught up.”
Jason returned with her gin and tonic. His eyes took in the tense mood. They were all watching each other as if there was a stand-off.
“What did I miss?”
Robin smiled up at him. Caught off guard by the beauty of her smile, Jason smiled back while taking his seat, his guard down. She took the glass and raised it to her lips before pausing.
“You didn’t slip me a roofie, did you?”
“No.” Jason said in surprise.
Robin chuckled mirthlessly. “Okay, because the first time you get slipped one…well shame on you. No, actually that really is shame on me. Shame on me the second time I got slipped one, also. But if I get slipped one a third time…well then it means that I’m just a damn idiot.” She swallowed back half of the drink and the three friends looked at each other in concern.
Robin’s eyes were even more hooded then ever when she lowered the glass. “So…where were we? Oh yes! My turn to ask you questions.”
Robin’s eyes fell onto Peter. “You’re a star now…or you think you are. Let’s be honest here…just between you and me Link,” her eyes swept the people at the table, “we’re all friends here. How many groupies have you fucked since you’ve been engaged?”
Peter’s eyes got big and his face turned beet red. Jason placed his hand gently on Robin’s but Robin wasn’t paying attention to either young man. Belinda was watching her sadly. Damn, and she had been going for anger.
She leaned forward again. “You really want to marry this asshole? He fucking made your life a living hell! I was there, I remember every time you saw him flaunt bitches in your face. And you know that shit is going to continue once he stops feeling guilty for his role in your abortion-”
“When did you become such a fucking bitch?” Belinda spoke quietly.
Robin sat back, Jason’s hand was still on hers. Two down, one to go.
“Let’s see…that happened somewhere between running out of Peter’s apartment in tears and fucking my way across the Bahamas.” She looked at Jason. “But there’s no better healing power like riding a big Jamaican dick on New Year’s Eve. Every time I hear Auld Lang Syne I’m going to have a very special memory.”
Jason looked away, his breath seemed to get caught in his chest.
Robin stood, taking a moment to glower at the people who used to be the most important people in her world.
Belinda evidently wasn’t completely crushed because she met Robin’s eyes, sadness making them glisten. “What did we ever do to you but try to be your friends?”
“Friends? When I needed a friend you sure as hell weren’t there for me. I turned to you time and time again and each time you stepped on my trust and like a dumb ass I kept coming back. Fuck you, you fake-ass bitches!” She lifted her drink and finished it. Jason wouldn’t even look at her. Belinda watched her with those stupid watery eyes. And Peter looked as if someone had socked him in his stomach.
Robin turned to the dance floor and sought out her friends; the ones that couldn’t hurt her because she had never allowed them close enough to hold that power over her.
Becca was dancing with her boyfriend of the week; a light skinned black guy with muscles as big as his head. She raised her brow at Robin. “Who was that guy you were talking to?”
“Nobody important.” When she turned to look at the table, it was empty. The evil glint fell from her eyes. It had made her a bit sad to say those things, but not as sad as it had been to be hurt by them in the first place.
Chapter 8
“Well…she’s changed.” Belinda said as she wiped away the tears that were streaming down her face. They were in her Range Rover, the one that Peter had bought her after signing the recording contract.