He shrugged. ‘You know the answer to that too.’
A word he’d said to me on the first night he’d visited me rose to the surface of my mind. It was a frightening word. One that seemed impossible, indefinable, unreachable. ‘Redemption,’ I murmured.
My ghost nodded. ‘Redemption.’
Roselyn
Knowledge was frightening. Realisations were frightening. Change was the most frightening thing of all. As I lay in my cell, fingering the cracks in the floor, imagining how my very own pegasis would look to distract myself from the reality of what had just happened, thoughts kept popping into my head, and I didn’t much like them at all. What they all led to was one simple fact – I was trapped here, in a place where I didn’t belong.
I wished I were still blissfully unaware, as I had been my whole life. It didn’t make sense to know such a thing, when there was naught I could do about it. It only tore me apart, very slowly. Because with it came another thought – a question, really – if I did have a way to escape, would I take it, knowing I’d never see Thorne again?
Sometime late into the night, I heard footsteps descend the steps into the dungeon. Whoever it was came to stand outside my cell, but it was so dark I couldn’t make them out. Then a scent reached me – the stench of blood – and I knew who it had to be. Terror struck me, in the way it only did when I was in the presence of this woman.
‘Roselyn,’ the Queen said, her voice high and cold.
I couldn’t speak. I should have addressed her, but I couldn’t. A shadow moved behind her, and I realised she wasn’t alone – of course she wasn’t alone. Vincent was with her, as always, and he smiled at me from behind her, his eyes twinkling with a sick kind of desire. There was only one person more frightening than the Queen, and that was her personal bodyguard.
‘Don’t fear, my darling,’ she murmured, and each word was like a knife slicing inside me, soft and slithering and deadly. ‘This will all be over soon enough.’ She paused. ‘Tell me, do you love my son?’
My voice broke. ‘Of course.’
‘Which one?’
I blinked, stuttering, ‘Thorne.’
‘Then why are you so cruel to him?’
‘I … I don’t …’
‘You humiliate him,’ she said simply. ‘You’re an embarrassment to our name. A girl like you – helpless – sitting by the side of the most powerful man in the country?’
There seemed to be something in my throat that was making it hard to breathe, hard to speak. But her words – those last words – confused me. ‘I thought … I thought we were supposed to be helpless at the side of our husbands. I thought that’s how you wanted us.’
She moved so that a shaft of moonlight glanced across her face and I could make out her expression. ‘Perhaps I’ve misjudged you. Maybe this stupidity of yours is all an act, and really you’re a snake, slithering its way into my family, preparing to strike.’
My mouth opened, but it took a moment for words to come. ‘You must not have believed me when I said I loved your son.’
‘I must not have,’ she agreed calmly. Then she shrugged, smiling slightly. ‘Well, either you’re stupid, or you’re acting like you are, but whatever the case, it matters not in the end. It will all be over soon enough. The solstice is in five days’ time.’ And then she left, whistling softly as she climbed the stairs and disappeared. Vincent stayed a moment longer, and the cold touch of fear was so severe that I almost lost my mind. Water gushed in my ears, waves crashed and threatened to pull me under. He grinned, his teeth sharp and deadly. And then he slipped soundlessly from the dungeon and I was dry again.
I sagged in relief, shivering in the cold. Using what little strength I possessed, I pushed the memories out, finding inspiration in my husband’s iron cage and making the bars in my own mind strong enough to forget.
Some time later I heard more footsteps and braced myself for the Queen’s return – perhaps she wished to torture me further. Instead I was met with the heavy boots of my husband. Thorne opened the bars and slipped into the cell. He was holding a huge pelt of animal fur, and he draped it over us both as he sank to the ground next to me. I didn’t understand, but the simple act, and the closeness of him were suddenly too much. Tears spilled out of my eyes and I covered my face with my hands, knowing he didn’t like me to cry in front of him.
He didn’t get angry, or leave. He put his arm around me and drew me into the crook of his side, one hand in my hair. ‘I’m sorry,’ he whispered. ‘I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how else to be.’
I looked up into his face, into his deep blue eyes. One tear spilt onto his cheek, and something possessed me to lean up and kiss it away. I tasted the salt of it on my lips. We were in a new world, a new world that lay within that single tear. He’d taken my hand and led me into it, and it was so bright that it hurt my eyes. In this new world, you told the truth – all of it. Even the truths you’d kept hidden from yourself.
‘I’ve spent my whole life wanting,’ I told him. ‘Just wanting. I want everything. I want too much. And I think, maybe … it’s leading me away from here.’
He closed his eyes and rested his forehead against mine, drawing his hand around to rest against my cheek. ‘You want everything,’ he muttered, ‘and yet I’ve given you nothing.’
I felt tears trickle all the way down over my chin and onto my neck.
‘I’ve made a mistake,’ he said, his voice deep and rough. ‘And now we have to leave.’
A sound escaped my mouth and I pulled back. ‘What?’
‘We have to leave here, Rose. I did something so foolish, and the only way to escape it is to leave this fortress.’
‘Where will we go?’ I whispered, barely daring to believe. This was something I’d never let myself hope for – to escape with Thorne.
‘South along the shore,’ he said, his eyes moving out of focus as he thought about his plan. ‘We’ll follow the oyster farms and then cut inland until we get to the other side of Pirenti. We can find somewhere to live far enough away that she won’t be able to reach us.’
I blinked very quickly. ‘Am I dreaming, Thorne?’
Suddenly he smiled, the rare smile. He was so handsome.
A new world. Where you told the truth. Where you were brave. ‘I love you,’ I told my husband for the very first time.
Slowly he nodded. ‘I know. I know that now, finally.’
Ava
After I threw my ring into the ocean, and a piece of myself with it, we went to bed. Ambrose believed we would be leaving the next morning, but I had a different plan. I didn’t sleep a single second that night. I rose while the moon was high and sat at the dressing table. Casting a look over my shoulder at his sleeping form, I felt my eyes change to gold, and knew I was doing the right thing.
I reached for a piece of parchment and a quill, and began to write.
You and I were not forged to love one another. That was a mistake.
Please don’t follow me.
A.
Ambrose
I awoke to find Ava gone and only that note in her place. I had no words and no thoughts and nothing left inside me. She hadn’t stayed, after all.
Ava
The guards saw me and let me pass. They were watching for a teenage boy, and tonight I had left my hair loose. I hiked through the jungle, keeping the water at my side. They had no vessels here, but there would be ships at the prison.
By midday, that’s where I found myself. Crouched in a thick copse of bushes on top of the hill, I peered down at the mighty stone building. It was perched on the edge of a cliff, the drop from which was enormous.
A ship was docked and currently unloading two prisoners. At least a dozen Pirenti guards lined the path to the prison, mighty axes slung over their backs. I watched the pair of smaller figures led past them, spat on and kicked as they stumbled their way into the stone fortress.
If I could sneak past those guards I’d be able to stowaway on the ship. It might
prove difficult staying hidden and feeding myself on the journey back – it was supposed to be several weeks before docking in Pirenti – but there was nothing left to do but try, no other way to get off this island.
Don’t choose a memory over a flesh-and-blood man who loves you to oblivion and back.
Closing my eyes, I forced his voice from my head. He had no right to speak words like those. Even now, even with my certainty, there was still a person inside me clawing to turn back, to find him, screaming her fury at being dragged away from him, when all she wanted was his skin and his voice and his eyes for however many minutes were left in the world.
Keeping low, I crept down through the long grass, eyes peeled for the guards and their patrol routes. Most had gone inside now, but a few milled about, restocking the ship and readying it for the journey home.
I waited for a gap in their work, then slipped silently into the water. It was icy cold, and salt infused every inch of my body. The waves were rough, and they buffeted me back against the hard shore several times before I got enough purchase to strike out for the ship. Fingers finding the wood, I searched around for the anchor rope I’d been aiming for. Finding it, I surfaced, keeping only my eyes and nose above the water, watching for the guards. If I’d been doing this properly, I would have waited in the hills for several days, watching the patrol routes, taking note of the guards’ patterns to make sure I had a safe path onto the ship. But I didn’t have the time – I had no idea when the ship would depart, and I couldn’t risk missing it. So my approach was rushed and careless.
I snuck onto the deck, keeping low and alert, and I ran straight into a cluster of Pirenti guards.
‘Ye’ve got tae be jokin’,’ one of the men said softly, grinning in disbelief. He had tattoos all over his face. ‘Must a been sent ’ere by the Gods ’emselves, a Kayan whore for our amusement.’
‘Where did you come from, girl?’ another asked me, his eyes dark and serious, unlike his delighted companion’s.
I straightened, readying myself. This was bad – very, very bad. I had three options. I could turn and dive back into the water and swim for my life. I could let myself be captured, as I inevitably would be. Or I could fight them, and try to kill at least one before I died.
‘Don’t do anything stupid,’ the dark-eyed man ordered me, sensing my restless aggression. ‘Answer me – where did you come from?’
I said nothing. There were four of them. They all had weapons, but none were drawn. I had nothing but a knife in my boot and a belt looped around my waist.
Face Tattoos stepped forward a few paces, still smiling. ‘Mayhap she’s a Scrap come back fer more.’
Dark Eyes shook his head, watching me closely. ‘This one’s never been here before. Her skin’s unscarred.’
I swallowed, preparing myself.
‘Take her to a cell.’
Face Tattoos advanced happily. He would not be happy for long – my promise to him. Rage came – it took me in its hands and cleared my head of everything. It moved inside my lungs and my veins and my bones and my muscles. It made me strong. He reached for me; he was slow and stupid and he underestimated me. I would only have this advantage with the first man, so I had to use it quickly. Ducking low, I slid beneath his hands, reaching for my knife and twisting in the same moment to slash up through the thick artery in his fat thigh. A bright spurt of blood flew through the air and splattered over the wood. A scream left his mouth, higher than I would have expected from someone of his size. But then again, size had absolutely no bearing on how you handled pain, nor how you faced fear.
I didn’t wait to see his reaction – the wound was so deep that he’d bleed out quickly. I kept moving through my slide, launching myself to my feet and spinning into a heavy kick that took the second guard in the side of the head. He went down, and I used his falling momentum to help me slash through his throat.
The other two were moving now, coming up behind me. I felt a blow to the head as I turned to face them, but tilted in time to take some of the weight from it. Dark Eyes was clearly in charge and in Pirenti that meant he was the strongest fighter. He had drawn his axe. It was a massive thing, so heavy I doubted I’d even be able to lift it. The other guard was still stupid enough to attack me with his meaty fists. To his credit, if one of those fists connected properly with my head, I’d be out cold, or dead, but I wouldn’t let him get near me with those things. Dodging a huge swing from the axe, I jabbed forward, going for the other guy’s stomach, the vulnerable spot between the ribs – jabbing once, twice, so fast he couldn’t manage to avoid the third stab. It got him in the guts, and I went in for two more jabs, tearing the wound right open. Unfortunately the axe was still coming at me as I finished off the third guy. It sliced through a thin piece of the flesh in my shoulder and caused me to stumble sideways. I managed to regain my balance in time to turn and see the huge wooden hilt of the axe coming straight at my head.
Chapter 15
Ambrose
With the Godsdamned note clenched in my fist, I kicked the door down. I had no idea how much of a head start she had on me, but I would find her before she reached my ma, that much I vowed. Ava didn’t know what she was going after – killing the Queen meant going through Thorne, and that was impossible.
The guards in the hall turned in alarm to see the door hit the ground, locks broken and useless. They raised their spears towards me, reeking of terror.
‘Easy,’ I told them carefully. ‘I’ve no desire to hurt you, but I must leave here.’
One of them sprinted away to inform Marla and the warder, but the other stayed put, spear tip touching my chest, trembling slightly with his hands. He was barely more than a child, his eyes shifting between yellow and blue, over and over again.
Holding those eyes, I reached up for the spear, moving very slowly. With one hand, I snapped the metal end off and dropped it to the ground. ‘Out of my way, lad,’ I ordered softly. As frightened as he was, he didn’t move, this Kayan kid. Too many ways in the world for me to be wrong – too many things I was understanding too late. I smiled at him, humbled by his courage, and then I pushed past and strode down the hall.
I knew something then, deep in my guts – this war between Pirenti and Kaya was over. It had to be. I’d die to make it so.
But first my girl. Find my girl.
The warder was waiting for me at the top of the marble steps, the sea stretching out behind him. I met his white eyes.
‘You know what’s in my heart,’ I said. ‘I have to stop her before she gets herself killed.’
‘You’ve got no faith in her.’
‘Bullshit,’ I snarled. ‘I love that girl more than anyone in this world does.’
‘That’s not what I said.’
I clenched my fists, feeling the familiar way they throbbed when violence was upon me.
‘You don’t think she can do it.’
‘No one can do it,’ I said flatly.
And then he said, ‘You could.’ A smile, an empty thing. ‘But you’re too cowardly.’
I stared at him, the words all too clear in my ears.
‘I cannot let you leave,’ the warder added.
My mind shifted into focus mode. Many years ago my brother had taught me a trick, and it had turned out to be the most important lesson I’d ever learn. A warder’s power came from the fact that they sensed things on a different level. They could reach their awareness out and behold everything that you were and would be, and thus understand the very nature of your actions. If you could shut out their awareness, however, they held no power over your mind. It had sounded impossible when Thorne first explained this, but it wasn’t. There were two Marks over my heart, and they were there because of Thorne. I was alive because of Thorne, more than twice, more times than I could count.
I moulded my mind into the sphere of emptiness that my brother had taught me. He and I had practised this so many times over the years that it was simple now. My body started to move on its own, instinctivel
y. My head was a white space – another space. For these precious moments, it had nothing to do with how I moved – the warder would never be able to reach me with it.
He moved his hands and I knew he’d sent a command into my mind for me to freeze. I felt nothing. Marla appeared between us like an apparition, sword drawn. She was nothing – disarmed with a simple twist of her wrist. I was moving towards the warder again. More commands flew at me, but my mind was empty and impenetrable. The hours and hours of repetitive training Thorne had made me endure had taken over.
I sprinted straight towards the warder, ducking and avoiding all the power bursting from him, and then I leapt through the air, flipping to land behind him. I grabbed him by the neck and tightened my grip sharply.
‘Don’t move,’ I growled. ‘Don’t even think about moving, or I’ll snap your neck.’
The warder froze, bristling with fury and confusion.
‘All it takes to defeat a monster like you is strength of mind,’ I informed him with a cold smile. ‘Now let me go or you die, along with a great deal of the people on this mountain.’
He didn’t say anything, nor did he move. Marla was staring at us, looking very frightened. ‘Let him go,’ she tried to order, shakily.
‘If you agree to let me leave,’ I said.
‘So you can tell your Queen we’re here?’ Marla exclaimed. ‘You leave and we’re all dead.’
‘Tell her,’ I ordered the warder, tightening my hold painfully.
He turned to Marla. ‘This man will not speak of us. I can see it.’
Marla’s mouth fell open. I didn’t have time to explain. As I let go of the warder I started to sprint down the steps, hundreds and hundreds of them.
I was halfway up the beach when I realised something.
I could feel it – a tingling. A very faint caress inside my skin. My footsteps faltered and I spun around, peering along the length of the rocky cove. No one had followed me from the marble village. There was not a soul in sight.