“Anything, Tera. You never have to ask,” he assures me. He kisses my forehead. It’s meant to be comforting, and it is. But as the SUV nears the gallery, I begin to shake.
“Tera,” Carter calls softly.
I look at him. “I’m okay. This is something I talked through with my doctor. It’s necessary, and she’s on speed dial should I need her.”
He looks skeptical as does Shea.
I don’t care. This isn’t about them. It’s about me. It’s about what I need. I think Carter needs this too, to see where… it happened.
The SUV stops, and I look at the front of the gallery, the large glass windows, the precious art beyond. It takes me a moment to muster the courage to open the door, but I do—well, I try to, but security beats me to it when I reach for the handle. They don’t touch it before. I’m sure Xander told them to give us time.
I step out of the SUV and notice a man in a suit standing on the side of the building.
Cage Nichols.
His hands are buried in his trouser pockets while he waits patiently, watching as I take the first step onto the concrete. I can’t tell what he’s thinking, I never can. His sunglasses shield his eyes which makes it even more difficult.
I remove mine. I want to see everything clearly.
“Carter?” I call out.
“I’m here,” he answers.
“You don’t have to do this.”
“Yes, I do.”
“Okay.” I take his hand in mine, then Xander’s in the other.
“Cage,” Xander says by way of greeting.
Cage just nods. “Security let me know you were coming here. I wanted to be here for you, Tera. I hope that’s okay.”
“It’s more than okay. Thank you for your support,” I answer. As Lucy said, he really is a gentle man to those he loves.
I let go of Xander and Carter’s hands as we near the back of the building. My throat goes dry, my heart thumps so hard in my chest it almost hurts.
Fear. Anxiety. Post-traumatic stress.
Anger.
I walk to where my car was parked as if on auto-pilot. The others follow at a distance. I don’t even see them now. I’m back there but not as me—as an observer.
“My car was parked right here. I was worried when I came out. It was after one in the morning. I was opening my car door when they called out. ‘You dropped your scarf’ is what he said. It wasn’t mine. He knew that though. It was a ploy to keep me from getting to safety. I realized my mistake too late, so I randomly dialed, hoping I’d reach someone. Anyone. I didn’t know if I had or not. I just… hoped.”
“They were talking. One mentioned art and how he does graffiti. I pretended my phone was dead when they wanted to put a phone number into it. I wanted to go. I told them I needed to go, but she leaned against the door. She was so pretty, but her eyes were hard, and it was in that moment, I knew I was in trouble.”
“They told me it could go easy or they could do it the hard way. Even if I’d gone along with it, I knew they’d have hurt me as they did. He hated it when I didn’t cry or scream.”
I walk to the spot where they dragged me.
“I’m surprised some of my skin isn’t still there.”
“Jesus,” Carter mutters.
“It was there,” I point. “I don’t know if it was minutes or hours, but it felt like an eternity in hell. I was grateful when I lost consciousness. I don’t know what happened after that. I don’t want to know. Ever.”
I look to Carter. “How long do you suppose it was?”
He shakes his head. “I’m not sure. A long time, Tera. A long damn time.”
I nod. My knees begin to shake when I see a spray paint can up against the side of an adjacent building.
You’re safe. They’re not here. It’s in the past. You’ve overcome. You win.
I blink, and I snap back to reality. Cage stands next to me.
“I didn’t know you then,” he begins, “but you were married to Xander and he was family. That made you family.”
I don’t know what to say, where he’s going, so I just remain quiet.
“I made sure those seven individuals would never hurt you again, Tera. The family protects its own,” he tells me.
“What do you mean by that?”
“They’ve been removed from this world. They don’t deserve to be here. Not after what they did to you. Not when I know they’d do it again given the chance. They went to prison, and their sentence was delivered the first week behind bars.”
“The sentence the ‘family’ gave them?” I ask.
He nods slightly, and only once. “The one I gave them.” Now he looks at me, removing his sunglasses. “No one will ever hurt you again, Tera.”
The way he says it, so self-assured. There’s no room for doubt.
I burst into tears. Tears of gratitude. Tears of relief. I throw my arms around Cage, and he holds me close while I purge the last of my grief—grief for all they took from me, grief for innocence lost.
I paint and paint and paint. I can’t stop. The scene in my mind’s eye is so vivid and vibrant. I only pause when Xander force feeds me a sandwich while I continue to paint, holding it up to my mouth for bites. He insists I drink milk as well. Apparently, he and Dad have had a “conversation.” I think that scares me a little.
“Wow,” Shea breathes out when she enters the studio Xander set up for me. Two of the walls are nothing but windows. The ceiling has a large skylight. I fell in love the minute I saw it.
I keep painting while Shea reads a book in the chair in the corner. People come and go. I don’t stop. Not until it’s finished. I add my initials in the corner, TRM, and only then do I step back and assess my work. It’s like nothing I’ve ever painted before. It’s bright colors. It’s happiness.
“That’s incredible,” Sera mutters behind me.
I wipe my hands on my paint cloth and set my brushes in the jar of cleaning solution.
I take a sip of the apple juice Xander left for me. I really need to pee. I’ve been holding it forever.
Lucy stands next to me. “You’re so talented.”
I don’t say anything. I don’t do well with compliments.
“You realize your paintings are scattered all throughout the house, right?” Lucy asks.
I nod. “I saw that. I see more and more as I explore this gigantic mansion. I asked Kennedy about them. He said to ask Jesse.”
“Did you?”
“Not yet.”
“I did,” she confesses. “He told me he and the guys would make purchases here and there of your works and hang them everywhere to have a part of you here with them.”
I nod and try hard not to cry. “They’re the best brothers a girl could ask for. Even when they screw up.”
Sera nods her agreement. “Are you going to sell this one?”
“No. This one’s a gift.”
“Lucky. I was going to ask to buy it,” Sera adds.
“You’ll get to see it anytime you want to. It’s a gift for your husband,” I tell her.
Her eyes widen, then go all dreamy.
“He helped me fight my light. He committed grievous sins to make that possible. I’ll never be able to thank him enough for that, so I want him to have the first look at that light,” I explain.
“I’m honored,” Cage says from the doorway.
I whirl around to look at him and smile.
“It needs to dry, and I’ll have it framed, but this is for you. Thank you for all you’ve done for me, even when we’d never met,” I praise.
He nods. “No thanks needed.”
Lucy wraps an arm around me. “It’s what family does.”
Not all families, I think to myself. Not all families kill. Not all families sell weapons. Not all families commit crimes in the name of love and loyalty—but I bet they would if they could.
“I’m proud to be part of the family.”
30
CARTER
“Are you okay, lo
ve?” Shea asks when we get to our room.
I nod. “Yeah. No. I don’t know. I needed to see it, where it happened. It brought closure, I think.”
She hugs me. “I’m glad. If you need to talk, you know I’m here for you.”
“I know. I’m a lucky guy.”
“Don’t you forget it,” Shea teases.
“Never.”
It’s our usual repertoire, one I live for every day.
“I think this helped Tera a lot,” Shea adds.
I nod. “Me too. And I’m glad they killed them.”
“Agreed. It was such a heinous thing they did to our girl. I remember…”
I nod and swallow hard. “Me too.”
“It’s time to put that to rest, Carter. You were there for her. You saved her,” Shea reminds me.
“Yeah. I used to battle the what if I’d been able to get someone to her sooner, but now, after all that shrink talk, I realize I did all I could do. I’m glad it was me she called,” I admit.
“Me too.”
“I could use a nap before we take off tonight. It’ll be a long flight.”
Shea yawns. “I’ll join you. I’ll set my phone alarm for an hour and a half. I still have to finish getting our things together.”
“We’ll do that together, baby. Let’s go rest.”
31
CAGE
I get in my car, lean back and sigh. Within seconds my phone rings, and without looking I know it’s Giovanni.
“Nichols.”
“How’d it go?” Gio asks.
“Very well. She found closure.”
“Better than I could’ve hoped for. And the Winters boy?”
I chuckle. “Boy? Matches me at six-four and outweighs me by a good fifty pounds—and that’s muscle. He’s massive.”
“He’s still a boy to me. They’re so young.”
I grunt in agreement. “He seemed lost for a while. He looked lighter when he walked away. He’s a hard read.”
“For you, Nichols? That’s a rare thing.”
“I know. But they’ll be okay. I told them. Tera cried and hugged me,” I inform him.
“Good. I’m glad we could help. Are she and Xander solid?” he asks.
“As steel. Unbreakable.”
“But…” he prods.
“She hasn’t mentioned moving from New York,” I tell him my concern.
“She will. Especially now that she faced her past. It’ll all come in time, my boy,” Gio assures me.
“We’re off to Chicago tonight. I’ll let you know when we land.”
“Safe travels.”
With that, the call ends.
Like Gio, I, too, am glad we could help them—all of them.
32
XANDER
“How’d it go today?” Linc asks. We’re on the plane headed to Chicago for the concert the day after tomorrow.
“Good. She got closure. Carter too,” I answer softly.
Linc nods. “Good.”
“Why didn’t you go?”
“I already went there, man, after one of my fights. After seeing the tapes…” his hands clench into fists. “I had to see for myself.”
I nod. I’d been there before today, too. More times than I’ll ever admit. The scene of the crime. The spot where those seven thugs changed the course of so many lives.
“They’re dead,” I blurt out.
He nods. “I figured. Family and all.”
“Yeah,” I breathe. I look down at Tera who’s fallen asleep against me, her head resting on my shoulder. I scooped her up and cradled her in my lap, Lucy covered her with a blanket, then I rested my hand on the baby bump.
I wonder how she’s going to do at the concert. We’ve got a fifty-fifty chance. I hope it turns out for the better. If not, I’ll finish out these charity shows, then retire from Falling Down. It’s been a good run, but Tera has always meant more to me than the music. It took me almost losing her to realize that. I won’t make that mistake twice.
33
TERA
Yesterday the bands did their thing while I sketched anything and everything.
Xander whaling on the drums, grinning and singing along the entire time.
Jesse singing his heart out.
Ben fingering the strings of his guitar like it was an extension of his body.
Kennedy, eyes closed, feeling it all.
Ethan head bobbing to the beat.
Then came Blush. They had the same passion in their expressions as the guys of Falling Down did.
I get it. I do. I feel it when they’re up there. It’s just such an important part of Xander. What if things don’t work out? I’ve had massive anxiety all day and it’s only the crew and workers. Plus, I’ve had four security guards around me the entire time.
I sigh at myself.
Will I be able to weather the storm ahead? We’ll find out tomorrow.
The bands are already at the venue. When we pull up, people are everywhere. I start snapping my wristband. I take a deep breath, then nod to the security guard—Mike—that I’m ready.
I’m surrounded by men, each a foot taller and wider than me. You’d think I’d feel safe. Not quite. Maybe seventy-five percent.
It doesn’t get any better when we enter the building. There are five bands playing today. Five played yesterday and five will play tomorrow, so there are people milling around everywhere.
I continue to snap my wristband.
Damian walks up. He is one tall, dark, and handsome son of a gun. And those startling green eyes. He is all kinds of hot.
“How’re you doing, Tera?” is the first thing he asks.
“Anxious,” I tell him honestly.
“I see that,” he replies, looking to where I’m pulling the elastic strip constantly. “What can I do?”
“You’re doing it. The rest is up to me, if I can handle things.”
“Do you want to see Blush perform?” he asks.
I nod. “I’d love to.”
We move forward to a spot off-stage that’s been cleared for me.
I breathe out a breath of relief. “This is so much better. Thank you, Damian.”
He nods. “I thought this would work best for you. There’s a chair and headset if it gets too loud. I’m going to go check on the guys, but there’s a team of six here for you if you need anything.”
“Thank you,” I shout over the music.
He winks and my heart flutters. Oh my, he’s so pretty it’s easy to forget he’s also lethal.
I watch Lucy and crew perform. She owns that stage—they all do. It’s not just a concert of watching a band stand there. Not for Blush. They take it to a whole other level. They sing and dance—speaking of dancing. Nicole’s out there dancing like a pro with little Kadi. Kadi’s got bright purple headphones on to protect her ears. They’re all glittered and sparkled up. Adorable.
I can’t help but smile. When Shea and Carter walk up, we start to dance—even Carter I-can’t-dance Winters. The beat is too strong to resist.
All-too-soon they’re coming off stage. They all hug and greet me—sweaty messes that they are. My mouth goes dry when Trace and Jace come off stage, shirtless, using said shirts to wipe the sweat from their faces.
“Oh my,” Shea sighs. I nod in agreement. Carter’s checking out Lucy’s ass in her outfit.
I laugh. “We’re all perving on our friends.”
“Hell yeah, I am,” Shea announces.
“Who better to perv on?” Carter asks.
“True enough. I need a water. I’ll be right back,” I tell them.
Shea touches my arm. “Someone can bring it to you if you want.”
I shake my head. “I need to get used to it, right? Plus, I have security.”
“Be careful,” she tells me.
“Always.”
We make it ten steps before I’m mobbed—but they can’t get to me. I’m surrounded by hulks. It’s just—I get a bit claustrophobic not able to see the walls of men. I duc
k between two of the guys and back into a corner.
“Are you okay?” Mike asks.
I nod. “I just needed space.”
He nods in return. They stand close but not too close.
All these people. Wow.
“Falling Down’s up next,” Mike tells me.
I move forward and find the room with the beverages. I grab two bottles of water, putting one in my bag before heading back out. I bump into Kennedy.
“Steady there, little mama,” he tells me, pulling me close for a hug. “You doing okay?”
I nod. “Fine. Crazy, right?”
“Awesome,” he corrects.
“Baby,” Xander yells with a huge smile. He’s wearing a thin tank and basketball shorts. His signature band-ware.
“Hey.” I return. “You look hot.”
His eyes darken. “I can make time…” he teases.
“One of these times I’m going to take you up on that. Show you how real women do quickies backstage,” I taunt.
He holds his hands (drumsticks in those hands) over his chest. “Be still my heart, wife. You speak straight to my loins.”
I laugh. “Did you seriously just say loins?”
He nods. “Loins, loins, loins. I’ll set yours on fire later.”
“Now you’re talking.”
“I’m gonna go out there with a semi,” he announces.
I smirk. “You’ll survive.”
“Yes, I will, but later I’ll take that pent up sexual aggression out on you.”
“Promises, promises.”
“Them’s fightin’ words woman,” he retorts.
I wink.
He nods. “You wait ‘til later,” he says, pointing a drumstick at me.
“Will you let me play with your stick?” I ask, running a finger along the one pointed at me.
“Baby, you can play with anything you want. Damian, do we have ten, fifteen minutes?” he asks, and I shake my head.
“Go on now. Play with your friends. You can play with me tonight.”