If Christy thought her mind and emotions were on overload before, all circuits shut down now. Looking up into Todd’s eyes, she knew he had just given her an important truth. With that truth came the freedom to become a person she had never dreamed of becoming before.
“Hold these tears for me,” she whispered. Todd put his arm around her, and Christy leaned against his chest, letting the tears flow directly over his heart.
19
The next morning, Christy was hot when she woke in her room at the Paris hotel. She kicked off the sheet and lay in bed, wishing with all her heart that she could find a way to express to Todd how much she appreciated the gift of his words. Shortly after arriving in Basel and beginning her work at the orphanage, she had found herself fighting against a deep sorrow and weariness whenever she was around the children. What kept her there all those months was the knowledge that they needed her.
Deep inside, Christy had felt emptied. At first she thought something was wrong with her, because when she looked at the workers around her, they all seemed to get filled up and invigorated working with the children.
“What time is it?” Katie mumbled, kicking off her bed sheets, as well.
“It’s only 7:00. We were going to try to sleep in today, but I can’t. It’s too hot.”
“Let’s wake up Todd and tell him we’re ready for breakfast. Are you sure that window is open as far as it will go?”
“Yes. We didn’t have much of a breeze last night. It’s not that it’s so hot; it’s just that there’s no air. If we had a fan it would be much better.”
“I doubt they have any extra fans,” Katie said. “This is a budget hotel, you know. Seth told us it was the best he knew of this close to town.”
“That reminds me,” Christy said. “I ended up with some of Seth’s postcards. They need stamps so I was going to mail them for him today and write home to my family, too. Have you sent any postcards yet?”
“Are you kidding? When did we have time to buy postcards? Or souvenirs, for that matter. Do you realize the only thing I’ve bought so far is food? At least you were smart and bought that diary in Italy. I wish I had gotten one.”
“We sure haven’t done any shopping, have we?” Christy said.
“I wish now I had bought that sweater we saw in the shop window in Oslo. Do you remember? It was a blue-and-white hand-knit ski sweater. I think we figured out it cost about eighty-five dollars.”
Christy could barely even think about a ski sweater in their present sweltering condition. “Do you have that much to spend on souvenirs? I’m impressed.”
“Not really, but I could have bought it and then eaten bread and water the rest of the trip.”
“I feel like all we’ve been eating lately has been bread and water,” Christy said. “I don’t even want pastry this morning, if you can believe that.”
“No, I don’t believe you for one second.”
“I want some protein. Doesn’t chicken sound good right now? Or a steak?”
“I’d settle for a Big Mac and French fries,” Katie said.
“Oh, don’t do that to me! Do you know how long it’s been since I’ve had American French fries?” Christy sat up and reached for the clothes she had left hanging over the end of her bed. “Come on, let’s get dressed and go find some French fries. We are in France, after all. If Todd wants to sleep, we’ll let him sleep. I want to eat!”
“I’m with you.”
Christy and Katie had just pulled on their shorts when a knock sounded on the door. “Just a minute,” Christy called out. She shook out her last slightly clean T-shirt and pulled it over her head. “Are you decent?” she asked Katie.
“I’m never just decent. I’m always extra nice.”
Christy gave her a pained expression and opened the door. Todd stood there, dressed and ready to go. He grinned when he saw Christy. “You guys couldn’t sleep in, either, I take it.”
“We’ve talked ourselves into a food frenzy, Todd.” Katie quickly brushed her hair. “Join us, if you dare. But I warn you, it might not be a pretty sight. Our quest for French fries is not for the fainthearted.”
“I think I’m up to the challenge. Although I’ve never heard of anyone actually buying French fries in France. When I was in Spain, the word was that the best French fries on the continent were in Brussels.”
“How far away is that?” Katie asked.
“Three hours, I’d guess,” Todd said. “It’s between here and Amsterdam.”
“Then, let’s go,” Katie said. “I’m ready to blow this town, aren’t you? It’s too hot. And what’s left for us to see? We managed to fit in all the main sights yesterday.”
“What about going to Spain?” Christy asked. “I mean, aren’t we halfway there?”
“Not exactly,” Todd said. “It’s almost twelve hours from here to Barcelona and then seven hours from Barcelona to Madrid.”
“I forgot that Paris was so far north,” Christy said. “But don’t you want to see your old friends?”
Todd thought a moment and then shrugged. “A lot of them have taken other posts around Europe or have gone back to the States. I can’t think of anyone I was close to who’s still there.”
“So Brussels it is!” Katie announced, throwing clothes into her bag.
“I’ll go pack.” Todd headed back to his room.
Christy had noticed when she opened the door that his forehead was peeling slightly where her hot tea had burned him. At least it wasn’t red anymore and looked as if it was healing.
“Do you think they have a place where we could do some laundry in Brussels?” Katie asked. “I’m on my last clean everything today.”
“Me too,” Christy said. “It’s been a week since I washed my stuff in Oslo.”
Katie stopped her frantic packing. “That means we have less than a week left.”
Christy looked at the round clock on the wall. “It’s 8:00. Exactly one week from right now I’ll start summer term. And now I don’t know if I even want to finish those classes.”
“Why not?” Katie asked.
Christy tried to explain how Todd’s words on the bus had given her freedom. She felt as if God had released her from the work at the orphanage and from the drive to earn a degree in early-childhood education.
Katie stared at Christy. Perspiration from their stuffy room glistened on Katie’s forehead. “What are you going to do now?”
“I have no idea,” Christy said with a smile.
“And that doesn’t spook you just a little?”
“I think I was a lot more frightened when I was working so hard for a degree that didn’t make me feel excited about the future.”
“This is big-time, Christy. I mean, you were supposed to enter Rancho Corona in September with all the credits you were going to transfer from this program in Basel. You were on a fast track to graduate.”
“I know.”
“If you change majors now, aren’t you a little freaked out about losing all those credits? It could take you a whole lot longer to finish.”
“I know.”
“Don’t you get it?” Katie stood with both her hands on her hips. The perspiration was now streaming down her face. “That means even longer before you and Todd can get married.”
Christy gave Katie a timid shrug. The same thought had crossed Christy’s mind. But she was too euphoric about the thought that she could dream new, big, freer dreams to let that complication steal her sunshine.
“Let’s head out of here,” Katie said. “I don’t want to get any more heated up in this room. I feel like I’m going to melt.”
Once they walked out of the old building, the air movement allowed them to breathe again. It was warm, but nothing like it had been in their closed-off room. They walked to the nearby train station and bought rolls and cheese and funny-shaped cartons of yogurt to eat on the train.
The three hours to Brussels, Katie was quiet. Christy knew Katie wanted to talk more about Christy’s life-chang
ing decision to switch majors. But Katie seemed to be waiting until Todd wasn’t around before she continued to give Christy the rest of her mind on the topic.
Katie got her chance about a half hour before they arrived in Brussels. Todd left them alone while he went to stretch his legs, and Katie jumped right in. “So do you think you would get married before you finish college?”
“Katie, I can’t believe you’re asking me that.”
“I know you’ve thought about it. I’m just trying to get you to answer your own question.”
“I don’t know, Katie. All I can do is take one step at a time, as God makes that step clear. Right now all I know for sure is that I have the freedom to change my major. I don’t know what I’m going to change it to. I don’t know if I’m going to stay in Basel for the summer session. And I really don’t know what the next step is in my relationship with Todd.”
“And that doesn’t frighten you?”
Christy thought a moment before shaking her head. “No, it feels right. More right than anything has felt in a long time.” She remembered how distinctly changed she had felt the night she and Todd had stood under the amber streetlight on the uneven cobblestone street in Capri. All doubts had flown from her heart. She knew then that she had passed through some invisible tunnel and was no longer a teenager. She was a woman. That same sense came on her now. Christy wondered if this was what a person was supposed to feel like after yielding every area of life to the Lord and waiting for Him to move.
She tried to explain it to Katie as an awareness of the Holy Spirit’s presence comforting her. Katie said she thought she understood. Todd returned then and all talk of future plans ceased.
Christy didn’t mind that she and Katie were done talking about that subject for the time being. However, Christy knew she needed to have an openhearted discussion with Todd. She had some decisions to make in the next few days, and she wanted Todd’s input. More important, she wanted to hear what Todd’s plans were for the future.
Their train arrived in Brussels, Belgium, at exactly noon. The first thing they did was search for a French fry cart. Todd said his friends from Spain had come back with stories of such carts on Belgium streets, just like Italy had gelato carts and New York had hot dog carts.
They didn’t have to go far from the station before they spotted their first frites cart. As they stood and watched, large wedges of already fried potatoes were fried a second time until they were crackling hot. The vendor offered them several sauces to dip the frites in. One looked like mayonnaise. Christy passed on the sauce and tried her frites au naturel.
“Hot!” she said after taking the first bite.
Todd tried one of the darker-tinted sauces. “Not barbecue sauce. Not ketchup. I don’t know. Shrimp cocktail, maybe.”
“This is so bizarre,” Katie said, trying the mayonnaise-looking dip. “I like it, so maybe I don’t want to know what I’m dipping it in.”
“In Switzerland the kids at the orphanage like their popcorn with sugar on it instead of salt and butter,” Christy said. She realized that was the first time she had brought up anything about the orphanage this trip without feeling a tightening knot in her stomach. She was free. Really free.
Christy enjoyed her frites immensely. She surprised Todd and Katie by ordering a second helping when they were ready to walk away.
“We’ve had our French fries,” Katie said. “What do you guys think? Do you want to stick around here awhile or jump on a train and head for Amsterdam?”
“We just got here,” Christy said.
“I checked the train schedule,” Todd said. “It’s about three hours from here to Amsterdam. A lot of trains run during the day. We could stay here for the afternoon and then go on to Amsterdam for the night. If we decide to do that, I should call my friends to see if we can stay with them.”
The next goal was to return to the train station, find a phone, check train schedules, and settle their plans for the day. A short time later Todd exited the phone booth with a piece of paper in his hand.
“They’re expecting us at 6:30 tonight. Mike said he would pick us up at the station and take us to The Rock for their 7:00 meeting. I’m going to help out with music tonight.”
“Wait a second,” Katie said. “What did I miss here? What is The Rock? What music are you talking about?”
Todd explained that a couple he worked with in Spain now ran a youth hostel in Amsterdam called The Rock. Every night they offered a worship service from seven to eight. Christy could tell Todd was excited about seeing his friends and probably even more excited to have a guitar in his hands again.
The heat wave wasn’t as overwhelming in Brussels, but the afternoon sun was strong enough as they walked around with their heavy packs, killing time. Christy and Katie left their packs with Todd outside a small shop so they could go in and hunt for Belgian chocolate and some souvenirs. Christy bought three beautiful, delicate lace doilies that the clerk said were handmade. Katie said she wasn’t exactly a doily kind of person, but the clerk talked her into buying four lace bookmarks.
“I thought they would be good gifts for people when I get home,” Katie said. “Especially because they don’t weigh anything.” She strapped on her pack and groaned. “Is it my imagination or do dirty clothes weigh more?”
They found a park a few blocks away and stretched out in the shade.
“Oh, I was going to buy postcards,” Christy said. “And stamps.”
“I’ll stay here with your packs if you and Katie want to go back into town,” Todd said.
“You know, this seems crazy,” Christy said. “We’re all kind of tired and not energetic enough to see anything around here. We don’t need to wait until the late afternoon train to Amsterdam. We could go now and spend our time buying postcards and stamps in Amsterdam as easily as here.”
“I agree,” Katie said. “Besides, I’m hungry for some more frites. Let’s go.”
They stopped at the same cart where they had bought the fries before and then ate them as they walked to the station. Their timing was perfect because the next train to Amsterdam was just pulling up. Once they were settled in their seats, Katie started to laugh.
“What?” Christy asked.
“Are we getting apathetic or what? We just spent two hours in an entire country. That was Belgium. Buh-bye, Belgium,” Katie said, waving like a beauty queen as the train pulled out.
“It is pretty pathetic,” Christy said, “when the only souvenirs we’ve bought this whole trip are from a country we only stopped in so we could eat their French fries.”
All three of them laughed. The train pulled out of the station, and Todd challenged Christy to a game of chess. Katie announced she was going to find something to drink. “You guys want anything?”
“No, thanks.” Christy pulled out a brush from her pack. While Todd set up the pieces, she worked on her hair. Most of the trip she had worn it in a loose braid. This morning, because of the heat, she had twisted it up on the back of her head, but it had been falling out slowly over the last few hours. Now she let down her hair and brushed out the tangles.
“I like your hair long,” Todd said in one of his famous short statements.
Christy felt herself blush. Todd rarely made any comments about her appearance. Years ago he had said he liked her hair long after she had chopped it off. She had been growing it out since then, partly because she knew that’s how Todd liked it, but mostly because she liked doing a lot of different things with it.
Todd made the first move on the chessboard. Christy playfully turned her back to Todd and then tilted her head all the way back. The ends of her straight hair almost reached to her waist.
“There,” she said, her chin tipped toward the ceiling. “Is that long enough?”
She turned to Todd. He had a smile on his face. It was the same happy, contented smile she had seen when he kissed her in Norway on their way to see the Kon-Tiki.
She made her move on the chessboard, then twisted h
er hair and was about to fasten it with a clip, when Todd took his move and then said, “No, braid it. I want to see how you do it.”
Christy divided her hair into three sections. “Like this,” she said, quickly passing the sections between each other and making a braid in a few seconds.
“Wait, that was too fast. Do it again.”
“Why? Do you want to learn how to braid or something?”
“Sure,” Todd said as if her words were the only invitation he needed. Leaning forward and taking the strands from her, he said, “Okay, which side do you start with?”
“Either one. Doesn’t matter.” She sat patiently while Todd asked directions and slowly braided her hair. The first braid was too loose. On his second try, he pulled too hard, and Christy let out a yelp.
“This better?” Todd asked as he more gently tugged and twisted her hair.
“That’s okay. It doesn’t have to be really tight. Just tighter than the first time.”
“There,” Todd announced. “How’s that?”
Christy took the braid from him and felt up and down with her fingers. “Not bad.”
“Not bad?” Todd said. “I’d say it’s better than not bad. I’d say it’s pretty good.”
“Okay,” Christy said, turning and smiling at him. “It’s pretty good.”
Todd smiled back. “It’s my move, right?”
“Very sneaky! You know it’s my turn.” Christy stared at the pieces on the chessboard for a long while. She wasn’t thinking about chess, though. She was thinking about the way Todd had braided her hair and the way she knew he was staring at her now.
That had to be one of the most tender, romantic gestures you’ve ever made toward me, Todd Spencer. You’re in love with me, aren’t you?
She could tell he was leaning closer. Christy pretended to concentrate on the game board, but she couldn’t because she could feel Todd’s warm breath on her neck. All she had to do was turn her head slightly and she would feel what she wanted to—Todd’s lips brushing her cheek.