Page 19 of Save Me


  He threw his head back and laughed. "Tegan, out of the both of us I'm definitely not the one that sucks." That wasn't exactly true but I didn't want to get into a conversation about all the times he'd had his mouth on me so I kept shut and slapped his arm.

  Kai drove to the house Holly and James were viewing, snickering now and then, still very pleased with himself. I got out of the car and ignored him.

  The house was at the end of a row of four and looked pretty cute with a little wooden fence and colourful flowerbeds. Holly and James were waiting outside for us and I could feel Holly's excitement.

  Joan, Holly's aunt, was an estate agent so she let them have the keys for a few hours as the house was empty. Still ignoring Kai, I followed them inside after saying a quick hello.

  "Are you not talking to me?" Kai asked, failing again not to laugh.

  I looked away from him and just knew he was shaking his head at me. We walked into every clean, bright room and for a new house it actually didn't look that boring and samey as they usually did. It still needed personalising but it was plenty big enough.

  "I love it, I love it, I love it," Holly chanted as we walked into the back garden. She'd said that about every room so I was pretty sure James was getting his checkbook out real soon.

  "Come on, talk to me," he said, groaning and trying to step in front of me.

  "You shouldn't have been a dick to her then," Holly said, poking him in the chest.

  "You don't even know what I've done," he replied.

  "But I know you've done something."

  I rolled my eyes. "Fine, I forgive you for being a prick."

  "Thanks," he replied sarcastically.

  James grabbed Holly's hand and said, "Let's go see upstairs again, I want to make sure we'll get all your clothes in the room."

  "There're three bedrooms, James."

  "Yeah, I know!"

  I heard her nagging at him as they walked back inside. I was left with Kai. Narrowing my eyes, I crossed my arms over my chest. "Are you ready to be nice to me now?"

  He opened his arms. "You only ever need to ask and I'll be as nice as you want whenever you want."

  I slapped his chest. "Ha ha."

  Dropping his hands to block my blow, he asked, "So where's your crazy friend?"

  Sophie he meant. "Why is she crazy?"

  "She keeps texting me."

  "Yeah, you're right, she must be crazy if she likes you."

  He glared. "I know you don't mean that, you've been under and over me enough times."

  I really did bring it on myself. "She's with Will."

  "Ah, Will's this week's conquest then."

  I slapped him again in Sophie's defence.

  "He's not a conquest. She just likes to try before she buys."

  He laughed. "Right. Hey, I'm all for doing what the fuck you want, but a reputation as a slut is hard to shake and makes it hard to get the person you want to trust you to actually trust you."

  "Hey, I was like her before," I said. His words made me feel ashamed, not that I wasn't already. Losing my virginity in the backseat of a car was a particularly low point.

  He ran his fingers over my forehead, flattening my frown. "You were nothing like her."

  "You didn't know me right after my dad died, Kai."

  "So tell me." I looked at him like he'd grown another head and then I started to consider it. "Tell me," he said and snorted. "It can't be that bad."

  Oh, it could.

  "Okay. I was innocent before he died, like nun innocent. I lost my virginity a few days after his funeral to Adam's older brother on a drunken night out in the back of his car. I slept with random guys at clubs and parties and I didn't care what happened to me. Before I met you there was a different guy almost every time I went out and I hate myself for it."

  "I'm sorry, princess, your first time shouldn't have been like that," he said and wrapped me in his strong arms.

  "It's fine, not every girl gets flowers, candles and expensive hotel rooms, Kai."

  "You should," he replied.

  I smiled and kissed his cheek. "Thank you."

  "My pleasure. Hold on, I was one of your passing random guys?"

  "You were but I just can't seem to get rid of you," I teased. Completely unexpectedly, he bent down and bit my neck, making me squeal. "Boundaries!"

  Laughing, he pulled back and winked. I was still in his arms and I was pretty sure I couldn't overpower him to get out.

  "Whoa!" I looked up to see James and Holly at the back door. James pouted. "Hey, we want to be the first ones to christen the garden so knock it off."

  "Very funny," I replied dryly, shoving Kai off and slapping his chest for the third time in as many minutes. He did nothing but flash that cocky smile.

  Chapter Thirty-Eight

  Kai

  I would damn well love to christen the room with her. She drove me crazy and could literally get me hard with just one look. I wished I'd met her right after her dad died, maybe then she wouldn't have lost her virginity on the backseat of a car. I wasn't an angel but I wouldn't have let that be a girl's first time. Well, not anymore anyway.

  Back at mine, we sat on the sofa, waiting for Sophie and some Mark guy to get here. She's spent the day with someone called Will but had moved on already. I didn't even know the same amount of people as she'd slept with.

  "Don't leave me alone with Sophie tonight, Tegan," I said as Holly let them in.

  She giggled and grabbed my hand. I felt her touch down south. "I got your back, don't worry... Astro."

  "Astro?" I asked, raising my eyebrows.

  "Spaceman's just too long."

  Fuck my family.

  "No," I said. "No space related nicknames or I'll have a chat with your mum, there must be something I can use against you." Of course I wouldn't really have a conversation with her mum since I was pretty much the anti Christ.

  We'd decided to keep things low key, eat greasy Chinese and watch something funny on TV.

  I positioned myself on the edge of the sofa beside Tegan. Wandering-hands-Sophie, couldn't cop a feel. I didn't mind an assertive woman but I wasn't keen on sex pests. Thankfully, Sophie seemed to be a one man woman tonight but I wasn't taking any chances.

  "I'm so full," Tegan said, handing James her half eaten chow mien. He'd polish them off and everyone else', too. Pig.

  Tomorrow she was starting back at sixth form and although I wanted to keep her here for as long as possible and drive her home in the early hours I knew I couldn't. I didn't want her to feel like shit on her first day so we were doing an afternoon thing. Selfishly, I did want to keep her longer. I wanted to do a lot of things with and to her actually.

  By the time the vultures had downed all my beer and stuffed their faces full it was seven o'clock and time for them all to do one. I bundled a very reluctant Tegan in my car and waved the others off. I was almost certain that Sophie was giving Mark a blow job as he drove off, she wasn't that short.

  "I feel like a child," Tegan whined. "It's still early."

  "Well, at least you're handling it maturely."

  "You have to get up early in the morning and if I don't take you home now so you can get a good night's sleep I know you'll be chewing my ear off tomorrow." She folded her arms over her chest and pouted. I knew she didn't like being home much but this was ridiculous and a bit amusing. "Hey, now you look like a child, too."

  She gave me a dark look and tried not to laugh. "Wanna come in and watch a movie? I'll even let you choose."

  "Can you not entertain yourself for one night?"

  She saw straight through me, though. I was sure 'hell yeah' was written all over my face. "Great. So, what do you wanna watch?"

  "One film, Tegan, and not a long one."

  "Aww, Kai, don't beat yourself up too much."

  Rolling my eyes, I pulled over outside her house. I should've expected that as soon as I'd said 'long one'.

  We sat on her bed and watched Letters to Juliette. Turns out it wasn't
my choice after all. Didn't really matter, though. Tegan got ready for bed and I had an awesome view of her legs in tiny shorts.

  Ava popped her head around the open door. "You two want a drink?" That was the second time in under half an hour that she'd asked. It was obvious what she was doing but it was really unnecessary. I wasn't about to jump Tegan's bones when she had a boyfriend and her family were just downstairs. Unless she asked nicely.

  Tegan, reaching her limit, snapped, "We're not having sex, Ava!"

  Oh, dear God, what do I say now? I smiled, trying to make it look natural when all I wanted to do was laugh. Ava was being fucking annoying but Tegan had successfully shut her up.

  Turning on her heel, Ava stalked off, shaking her head.

  Just when everything was going to shit on screen - though it'd be fine in ten minutes time no doubt - Tegan fell asleep.

  I crept off the bed and brushed her blonde hair out of her face. Fuck, she was beautiful. Her long eyelashes casted shadows on her face and her pink lips pursed, ready to be devoured. Okay, I needed to leave before I did something I would not at all regret.

  Her phone rang and Lucas's name flashed on the screen.

  "Princess." I nudged her shoulder but she didn't even flinch. Shit. I pressed the answer button. "Hello, Lucas."

  "Kai? Where's Tegan?"

  I nudged her again and she groaned. "Go away, Kai," she mumbled sleepily.

  Chuckling, I replied to Lucas, "Err, she's asleep."

  "Yeah, I heard," he said, sounding amused. "So how was the house?" he asked, making awkward small talk.

  "It was good. I think they're gonna buy it."

  "Cool. So, she at home now?"

  "Yeah, she was bored and wanted to watch a film. I think she might be nervous for tomorrow, too."

  "Right. Yeah, makes sense. Can you tell her to call me when she wakes up?"

  "Sure." I won't be here...

  "Thanks."

  We hung up at the same time, neither of us wanting to drag it out any longer.

  I put the phone down and got back on the bed. Willpower was never my strong point. "You awake?" She didn't say anything so I kissed the top of her head again. I love you.

  "She sleeping?" Alison asked as she came in Tegan's room twenty minutes later.

  "I'm not sleeping," Tegan mumbled into her pillow, throwing her arm over my stomach. Perfect. I was gonna get a hard-on when her mum was standing right there.

  "Sure you weren't," I said. Alison came in and sat on the bed with us. It was getting awkward pretty fast and I was trying, desperately, to control my hormones.

  "Whatever, Astro. What's the time?" She groaned and sat up.

  "Astro?" Alison asked.

  Tegan laughed, waking up suddenly. "Kai had a big space phase when he was younger."

  "Okay, princess, it was a long time ago and I really don't think we need to bring it up."

  "Aw, but you looked so cute in your little foil helmet."

  I turned to Alison. "What dirt have you got on her?" She laughed and stood up.

  "Lots, I'll go get the photo albums."

  Tegan grinned. "You know she hasn't got anything on me. I'm perfect."

  "Of course you are."

  Her playful facade faltered for a second. She didn't believe for one second that she was perfect. Who fucking was?

  "Here." Alison came back in and handed me an album.

  "Seriously, Mum?"

  I flicked open the first page and ignored Tegan shooting daggers into the side of my head. She was a cute kid, all big green eyes, unruly blonde hair and cheesy smiles.

  Alison leaned over. "This is Tegan when she was three. It was the first Christmas where she was excited about Father Christmas. She dressed up as an angel and wanted to be the one on the tree. When we said she couldn't actually sit up there she threw a huge tantrum."

  "Yeah, I can believe that," I said.

  Tegan mumbled something about hating us both but I couldn't care less, this show and tell was golden.

  "So, have you got any really embarrassing pictures?" I asked. I flicked through all three of the albums while Alison told me stories. Both me and Alison were laughing. The little princess was not.

  "Are you both finished?" Tegan asked, frowning adorably as I closed the last album.

  "For now, yes."

  "I hope you know I'm going to be seeing your mum again on Wednesday and I'll be asking her for stories, too." Damn, I didn't think of that.

  I put on a poker face and smiled. "Knock yourself out."

  "I will."

  Ava came in next, she really couldn't help herself, and sat beside Alison. She looked between me and Tegan and raised her eyebrows. She clearly had a problem with us. Our sides were touching, ooh.

  "What're we talking about?" Ava asked.

  "Embarrassing moments from Tegan's childhood," I replied.

  "And we'd finished. You suck, Kai!"

  Laughing, I nudged her. When Ava and her judgemental eyes weren't around things were actually pretty normal. Alison was cool with me now and I felt more and more comfortable around her.

  "You ready for sixth form, honey?" Alison asked.

  Tegan groaned. "Yeah."

  "I thought you were looking forward to it?"

  "I am, but it means getting up early again."

  "You don't have to get up that early," I said.

  She nodded. "It's before ten."

  "Well, yeah..."

  "So, Kai, do you have a girlfriend?" Ava asked. It wasn't a question that surprised me. The timing did, though.

  I clenched my jaw. She knew the fucking answer to that. If Alison wasn't here I'd have said something a little more colourful. "No," I replied.

  "Let's go, Ava," Alison said and got up. She looked embarrassed that her daughter had asked me that. It didn't bother me, not really. I was fine with people not liking me.

  "Tegan, don't be up too late, okay?" Tegan nodded at her mum before she closed the door.

  "I'm sorry about my idiot sister."

  "Hey, it's fine." I'd had worse.

  Chapter Thirty-Nine

  Tegan

  I could have killed Ava for asking him that. It wasn't even a general getting to know someone question either, it was loaded and everyone knew exactly why she was asking. And she called me a bitch.

  There wasn't really anything I could say without getting into a conversation I didn't want to have. Kai knew the deal, everyone knew the fucking deal, so there was no point going over it. I had to believe that if Kai had started to feel something for me he could either deal with it or tell me we needed to not spend as much time together.

  "You should sleep soon, princess, it's getting late. Oh, and Lucas called while you were sleeping, he wants you to call him back," he said.

  "I will soon but I'm gonna get a drink. You want one, too?"

  Smirking, he replied, "Please."

  I got up and left, needing a little bit of space to call Lucas and hopefully run into Ava and tell her to back the fuck off. I didn't interfere in her life so she needed to stay out of mine.

  I dialled Luke's number and he picked up almost immediately. "Hey."

  "Hey, Luke. Sorry I missed your call, I was sleeping."

  "Yeah, Kai said. So, what're you doing now?" Translation: is Kai still there.

  "Just getting us some more drinks, we're watching movies to take my mind off school tomorrow."

  "You'll be fine. I'll come over tomorrow after work and take you out to dinner."

  "You don't have to do that." We didn't live that far apart really but it was a little too far to be doing short, frequent visits.

  "I want to see you. In case you've forgotten, I'm completely in love with you."

  "Yeah, well, I might love you, too."

  "Thanks," he said sarcastically.

  "So, where are we going to eat tomorrow?"

  "Wherever you want, babe."

  "Hmm, I'll think of something." It would have to be somewhere that serves large portion
s or he'd be hungry five minutes later. "I'm gonna go. I'll text you in the morning, okay."

  "Alright, speak to you tomorrow. Have a good day at sixth form. I love you."

  "Thanks. Night," I said. I hung up and carried the drinks back up to my room.

  "Thanks," Kai said as I handed him his drink. "You going back to sleep anytime soon?"

  I shook my head. "Can't. I'm nervous as hell so I know I won't be able to sleep yet. Want to watch another film until I'm tired?"

  "Sure," he replied, more than happy to chill at my house until the early hours. We were so comfortable around each other that we could sit for hours and not even speak. I'd known Sophie and Adam a lot longer but there was no denying that I was closer to Kai.

  We finished watching another film and it was almost midnight. I really needed to sleep but I didn't feel at all tired.

  "I should go and let you sleep, Tegan, or you're going to feel like shit tomorrow." Kai sat up and I pouted.

  "I'm not tired. Can you just knock me out?"

  Chuckling, he shook his head and swung his legs off my bed. "I don't think I'll be doing that."

  "Ugh, you're a sucky friend. At least sing me to sleep."

  He sighed loudly, pretending to be annoyed. "Fine, I'll sing to you then you can stop your whining, princess, and get some bloody sleep." I could argue with him calling me princess this time and I didn't even really care as long as I got some rest before sixth form. "Lay down."

  I did as he said and he laid against the wall. My face was by his arm and I stared at Isaac's tribute on his skin. It really was beautiful and showed just how much Kai loved his little brother and wanted a constant reminder on him.

  I wasn't at all surprised when he started singing Just the Way You Are. Maybe it was the only song he knew, although Kai was more into rock music so it was probably the only soothing one he knew.

  His voice was gorgeous, low, deep and sexy. He could sing professionally but I knew there was no way he'd ever want to do that. By the time he started the chorus for the second time I was out of it, falling asleep with a smile on my face.

  ***

  I woke up in the morning late. My first day back and I was going to be bloody late, rushing around and so nervous I couldn't eat through fear of seeing it again as soon as I'd swallowed.

  School was only a two minute walk so the second I was ready I headed out. It was the beginning of June, a lovely hot day, and I only had about seven weeks to catch up before the summer holidays. I was determined.