"Okay. Go drink beer. I think you need it," I told him, and he laughed before turning and going back to his bike.
"He drives a Harley?" Braden asked, peering at him as he walked away.
"Stop it before Kent goes out there and tries to beat him up," I whispered, and stepped inside, letting the door close behind me.
"What? Kent knows I love him. I was just looking. Im curious about who youve been riding all over the place with these past two weeks. "
"Sure you are," Kent drawled, grabbing her ass before pressing a kiss to her mouth. "Ill go make some coffee," he said, then walked toward the kitchen.
When Kent was out of hearing distance, Braden grabbed my arm and pulled me into the living room. "Okay, how are you? How are your night terrors? Are you and Tripp getting along okay?"
"As good as can be expected, the same, and yes. "
Braden frowned. "I need more info than that. "
I sighed and sat down on her sofa. "I miss him. I miss him so much. But hes better without me. Even he knows hes better without me. "
"How does he know hes better without you? Have you talked to him?"
"No. But he hasnt tried to find me. You said yourself he hasnt called you. He hasnt called Tripp. Nothing. I did what he wanted. Deep down he wanted this and he got it. So, I have to figure out how to live. That was my ultimate goal, anyway. "
Braden pulled her legs underneath her as she sat down beside me. "You have a really hot biker dude helping you out," she said.
"I heard that," Kent called from the hallway.
Braden giggled and rolled her eyes. "Seriously. He seems nice. You arent bonding with him? I mean, youre with him every day and night. "
"I gave my soul to Woods. Hell always have it. "
Braden sighed and nodded her head. "Yeah, I understand that. "
"Glad I got your soul, Braden, because Im not sure I can beat that biker dudes ass. Hes thin but tall, and that types always hiding muscles under his clothes that you dont see coming," Kent said as he walked into the room holding two mugs of coffee.
Braden laughed and I managed a smile. I could attest to Tripps muscles. I spent my days with my chest pressed to his back and my arms wrapped around him. He had muscles all right. Lots of them. He also had tattoos, which had surprised me. I could see the wealthy, elite Rosemary in him at times, but he tried too hard to cover it with tats and swagger.
"Stop being jealous. Nothing is sexier than you in a suit and tie. That short blond hair and tanned skin. I know what I got and Im not looking for another," Braden said as Kent bent down to kiss her and give her one of the mugs.
I didnt want to witness this kind of affection right now. At least with Tripp I knew it was cheap sex he was getting. The romance was a little too much.
Braden read my mind. She was good at that. "Go on and let us girls talk. We need time," she told him, giving him a look that I knew hed understand. I didnt say anything. I needed him to go. No more touchy-feely.
"Sorry about that. I wasnt thinking," she said as he left the room.
"Its okay. I will have to learn to deal with that the rest of my life. Might as well get used to it now. Couples are everywhere. "
Braden reached over and grabbed my hand. "You will find your happiness. I think youre wrong about Woods but Ive told you that. He loves you. I know he does. I remember the madman who came chasing after you just a few months ago. He adores you. I hate to see you let that go. "
How could I keep it? "I couldnt stay. He was tired of my craziness. I heard him say it. He doesnt know I heard him, but I did. He was talking to Jace about how hard it was to deal with me. He was tired of it. "
"What! I dont believe that. You mustve misunderstood him. I cant see Woods ever saying that. And let me tell you, if he did I will cut him. Cut. Him. You hear me?" She was already getting worked up. I should have kept that to myself. I knew that would send her into a blind rage.
"What did he say exactly?" she asked, setting her cup down and studying me for any sign of a lie.
"It was a conversation, really. I cant remember exactly. "
"Bullshit. It is etched into that brain of yours and you know exactly what was said, word for word. Spill it. "
She wouldnt give in until I told her.
"I was at the club and I was looking for Woods. I decided to take the stairs instead of the elevator, so I stepped into the stairwell and I heard him talking. I didnt want to eavesdrop but I heard Jace saying that he didnt know how Woods had dealt with the crazy as long as he had. "
"And what did Woods do? Please tell me he shoved his fist up his nose. "
I shook my head and let the numbness ease me. I couldnt think about what I was saying. "He said it was what he had to do. That he couldnt let me be alone but it was affecting his work. " I stopped and swallowed, then looked down at my hands. Anywhere but at Braden. "He said that at least when Angelina was there, she helped. " That part hurt the worst. Hearing him say that someone like her was easier. That she was what he needed. Not someone like me. The crazy one.
"Maybe he wasnt talking about you. Isnt his momma a loony bitch?"
"No. Shes just mean," I explained. There was more. Jace had said more. "Jace said that Woods needed to get his ass away from the insane shit. He had a corporation to run. He then said . . . that Woods dropping what he was doing to deal with my batshit crazy episodes wasnt fair. That he needed to fix the problem. "
"Woods better have beat his ass then," Braden said, her face turning red.
I shouldve changed the subject so I could calm her down. But I needed her to understand that I had left Woods for him. This was what he wanted. He just didnt know how to ask for it. "Woods said he couldnt. Then he asked how he would do that. "
Braden shook her head, her eyes wide with disbelief. "That just doesnt sound right. That isnt the same man I talked to . . . that I talked to back when he came to get you a few months ago. "
"No. Its the man who had the responsibility of a country club and his mother laid on his shoulders overnight. He has real problems and concerns. Im more than he can handle now. "
Braden kept shaking her head. It would take her a while to process all of this. I hadnt told Tripp about that conversation. I hadnt wanted to talk about it. He hadnt pressed me the way Braden had, either.
"Youre not crazy. Youre not insane. "
"I know you believe that. But its in my blood, Braden. "
She gave me a sad smile. "No. Its not. Theres something I need to show you and a lot I need to tell you. While youve been riding on the back of a hot studs bike for two weeks, Ive been doing some research. "
"What? What do you mean research? On what?"
"Della Sloane, you were adopted. "
Page 23
Woods
Darla Lowry, my golf course manager, was now a board member. She was the one thing my dad had gotten right. I trusted Darla with my life. With Jace planning on marrying Bethy, Darlas niece, we were just tying the family knot tighter. Darla was also wise. She was older than me and she had seen this club grow and flourish for over twenty-five years. She deserved a seat on the board. She also deserved the paycheck that came with that seat.
My phone rang and I glanced down to see Bradens number. I hadnt talked to her in a few days but she always called when she had any information on Della.
"Hey," I said, praying this wasnt going to be something bad.
"I know why she left. There was more to it, just like I said there was. But before I tell you anything I need you to make me a few promises and listen to all I have to say, because Im not scared of you or your money, Woods Kerrington. I will hunt you down like a dog and bury you. Do you understand me?" Braden was fired up and ready to attack.
"If you can help me get Della back I will walk on fucking water," I replied.
"Good. I thought so. However, she thinks very differently. Shes of the belief that she has done you a favor. That you wanted to get rid of her and didnt know how. That sh
e walked away and now youre relieved and living the good life. "
"What? Why the hell? What the fuck gave her that idea? Did Tripp tell her that? Because I swear to God Ill kill him. "
"Sit down and take a breath. You did this. Dont go pointing fingers at other people. First, I have to tell you about a conversation Della overheard the day before she ran off. You had better tell me what she really heard, because what she thinks she heard will get your ass killed, and sexy biker dude will get off scot-free. Capisce?"
"Please tell me what she heard, because I honestly have no idea. "
"Did you have a conversation in the stairwell with your friend Jace that day?"
The stairwell? I sat down in my chair and thought back to before Della ripped my world away. I had talked to Jace that day. About my mom. "Yeah, I did. "
"And . . . "
I wasnt sure what she wanted me to say. "And what?"
Braden let out a loud sigh. "What did you and Jace talk about?"
Hell, I couldnt remember. My mother was stressing me out. I was planning on installing the new board. I was going to let Della come back to work and stop smothering her. Nothing that shouldve upset her. "I cant think of one thing I said that would have made her leave me. "
"So Jace never told you that you had to stop dealing with her crazy ass? And you didnt say that it was affecting your work and it was easier to work with Angelina? And Jace didnt say that you had to get rid of the batshit crazy because you had a corporation to run?"
I shot up out of my chair. "What?" I roared.
"I didnt think so. Didnt sound like you at all. If someone had called Della batshit crazy you would have beat their ass. Della, however, felt sorry for you for having to put up with her and thought it was in your best interest if she left. "
"Holy hell! I swear to God I never said that. Jace never said that. I wouldve killed him. We were talking about . . . we were talking . . . oh, motherfucker. " I knew what shed heard. She hadnt heard everything. Shed just heard enough.
"Please tell me you didnt just have an epiphany and this conversation did actually happen," Braden said, warning me.
"No. Of course not. I mean, it did but we werent talking about Della. God! Never Della. We were talking about my mother. She had just caused problems for me at the club and I was talking to Jace about how to deal with her. I . . . fuck! I cant believe she thought we were talking about her. Im coming to get her. I cant do this anymore. I have to explain this to her. She has to know. "
"No! Shut it, Kerrington. I told you at the beginning of this conversation that you would do just as I said. Im not done talking to you and telling you everything you need to hear. So calm down and put your damn keys away. When its time for you to come get her, Ill let you know, but this time I think its real important that she come back to Rosemary on her own. She ran. She needs to find her way back. The cavalry can stay put and be patient. "
"I have to see her, Braden!"
"Would you shut up and listen to me? I have information for Della that she needs to deal with first. She thinks shes going to be mentally ill because her mother and grandmother were. She thinks that staying with you means you cant have kids because their mother could snap at any time and go insane. She loves you more than she loves herself. So shes making sure you dont suffer that ridiculous fate shes convinced youll have with her. "
"We wont have kids. I just want her. If shes scared of that, fine. We wont have kids. I have to tell her I just want her. "
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know you do. Shut up, Im not done," Braden snapped into the phone. I fisted my hand around my truck keys and moved to stare down at my truck parked outside. I could get to her in five hours.
"Della was adopted. "
So many emotions ran through me at once, I wasnt sure if I was going to weep or cheer or fall to my knees and take deep, even breaths. Holy fuck. This was a game changer.
"She was adopted?" I managed to choke out.
"Yep. She was adopted. Her adoptive parents were scared to have kids because they were afraid that Dellas grandmothers mental illness was genetic. So they adopted a boy from the foster system. He was two when they adopted him. Then a couple years later they adopted a baby girl from a teenager who wasnt ready to be a mother yet. You know the rest. "
She was adopted. Her fear of being mentally ill like her mother was unfounded. "Does she know?"
"I told her today. She knows. Ive set up a meeting with her birth mother. Shes a kindergarten teacher. Shes married and has a ten-year-old son and an eight-year-old daughter. They live in Bowling Green, Kentucky. Her name is Glenda Morgan and she wants to meet Della. She said she tried looking for her after her son was born. She realized what she had given up and she wanted to make sure she was okay. But the file was closed and it cost money she didnt have to get an investigator. Her husband had agreed that with their income tax refund this year they would find her daughter instead of taking a family vacation. So when the investigator I hired found her she was as thrilled as I was. "
I wanted to like this woman, but knowing that her decision to give Della up had been the reason for the hell Della had lived through made it hard for me to forgive her. Where was the guy who knocked her up? Did he not care hed given up a child?
"What about her birth father?" I asked.
"Glenda has contacted him. His name is Nile Andrews. He lives in Phoenix, Arizona. Hes a dentist. Also married, with triplets. All girls. He wants to meet Della, too. His wife is being supportive of his decision. "
A kindergarten teacher and a dentist.
"Ive seen a photo of her birth mother. She looks like her. "
"Please let me come. I want to be with her through this. She needs me. "
"No, Woods. What she needs is to feel like shes strong. Like she can handle all of this on her own. She knows shes not going insane now. Thats big. Real big. Shes lived with that fear for so long. Its crippled her. She has to find her own strength now. And she needs to come back to you on her own. With the belief that she is strong and worthy of you. "
"Worthy of me? What the fuck does that mean? I belong to her. How can she not be worthy of me?"
"I know this and you know this but she has to figure this out on her own. She had shit for a life. I held her hand for years. Then she left me and within months she had you holding her hand. No one can hold her hand this time. "
"I dont want her to be alone. "
"This isnt about what you want, Woods. Its about what Della needs. "
I pressed my forehead against the window and closed my eyes. I didnt want her to be right. I didnt want to wait for Della. But this wasnt about my wants. Della loved me more than herself. She loved me enough to walk away because she thought it was best for me. It was time I proved I loved her more than I loved myself.
"Okay. But please, keep me updated. "
Braden let out a relieved sigh. "I knew youd do the right thing. Just so you know, I think youre worthy of her, and thats a high bar to reach. You promised to walk on water and I happen to believe Della already does. "
Page 24
Della
Her name was Glenda. When shed given birth to me it had been Glenda James. She married when she was twenty-two. I would have been six years old that year. She married a man she met her freshman year of college. They had fallen instantly in love. They had kids. Two of them. Today I would be meeting her. And if all went well I would be meeting her family.
I was in a surreal moment. One I couldnt seem to snap out of. The mentally ill woman who raised me wasnt my biological mother. I wasnt going to become her. The woman who gave birth to me was a teacher. She was a mom and wife.
And my brother. He had been adopted, too. I didnt remember him but hed been such a big part of my life. My mother had snapped after losing him and my father . . . or her husband. He wasnt my birth father and he had barely been my adoptive father before he was killed. There was so much my mother had told me that couldnt be true. She had sai
d she was nursing me and led me to believe she had gotten depressed after my birth. But she hadnt been pregnant. She hadnt given birth to me. None of that was true. I didnt know what was true anymore.
"What are you thinking?" Braden asked as she drove down the busy streets of Atlanta. Glenda was driving down with her family to Atlanta. We were meeting at a coffee shop that Braden knew about. I wasnt sure I could eat a meal with this woman yet. I also wasnt sure what to ask or say to her. There was so much I wanted to know but then so much I didnt.
"She doesnt know about anything. I didnt tell her. I found her but I didnt feel like it was my story to share. "
I wasnt sure I would be telling her about my life either. "What if I dont know what to say once I see her?"
"Then dont say anything. Do what you feel comfortable with. If today all youre ready for is hello, then thats what we will do. When you want more well make arrangements to meet with her again. "
Braden always made everything sound so easy. This woman had put her family in a car and had driven down to Atlanta to meet me. I had to say more than hello. "You wont go in with me?" I asked again. Braden had informed me that I had to do this on my own. It was my chance to prove to myself I was strong. That I was brave and that I didnt need someone to hold my hand. Though right now I was thinking I needed someone to hold my hand. I was terrified.
"Dont do this to me. I want to go with you. I hate the idea of you going by yourself, but this is for you, Della. This is for you. "
She was right. Braden was always right. I nodded. "I know. Thank you. "
I watched as she pulled the car into a parking spot in front of a quaint little coffee shop. There were tables outside and inside. The crowd wasnt big and I recognized the woman who had given birth to me from the photo Braden had shown me, sitting at the table in the courtyard to the left of the building. She had a cup of coffee in her hand and she was twirling it around nervously. This was scary for her, too, I guess. But she was brave. She was here alone.
"There she is," Braden said, pointing toward Glenda.
"I see her," I replied, and reached for the door handle.
"You can do this. "
I glanced back at Braden and smiled for the first time in weeks. "I know. "
Her eyes locked with mine the moment I stepped out of the car. I watched as she stood and looked at me. I made my way over to her table, still unsure as to what I would say to this woman. She had given me life but she was a stranger.