“Oh? What were you doing with Jack’s pills?”
“Nothing! I had a headache and was looking for some Advil when his pills got knocked over; I guess the lid was open or something.” Laura looked entirely believable. “You have to help me, Mom! If I tell him, he will kill me. You know that.” Laura’s eyes were pleading.
Her mom sighed “Yeah, I know, but couldn’t you just put them back in the glass?”
“That would be too gross, Mom; you always tell us not to eat things off the floor. So I flushed them.”
Laura’s mom went over to get her bag. “Don’t worry. I still have a prescription. I’ll run by the pharmacy and get some more before Jack finds out.”
“Thank you, Mom. You’re the best.” Laura felt relieved.
She went upstairs again and shut the door to her room. She felt bad about lying to her mom, but she needed any help she could get to turn this school year around and avoid a grade-point disaster.
* * * * *
Jack was excited as he walked around his room. Only five more days to the concert, and he was so eager to impress the talent scout from Devine Records. This was it! Jack’s chance to prove himself and to go places. Getting a record deal was far better than going to college. Jack wanted to be a star, he wanted recognition, and the thought of touring and sharing the group’s music across the country was an adrenaline rush.
He threw himself on the bed and envisioned Rolling Stone magazine with a picture of his band on the front cover. He smiled at the thought of how proud his parents would be then. He felt convinced that when TUA made it big, he would be rich and famous, and everything would be good. He could impress Elizabeth and buy her expensive gifts. He thought about what he would buy her if money was no issue, but he couldn’t come up with much. She wasn’t a girl to impress with jewelry and accessories. He would have to be much more creative than that.
Who else would he buy things for? He thought about his parents, and even though there was so much disappointment and resentment between them and him, he would still feel a tremendous joy in buying them a new car. The feeling of significance he would get, knowing that they would tell everyone that the car was a gift from their hugely successful son, felt sweet and rewarding.
He wouldn’t buy anything for Laura. He didn’t owe that self-righteous brat anything. She would be devastated, of course, to lose her place as their parents’ favorite child. While he was out playing and partying with his band, she could just keep her brainy head in her books, studying hard to earn her own money one day. Jack smiled a crooked smile, thinking that he would still make more money as a rock star than she would ever make as a doctor or a lawyer. I may not be as smart as her, but I have a talent and I plan to use it well. He fell asleep dreaming about shouting fans, limousines, and money rolling in.
CHAPTER 28
A first time for everything
Benjamin looked in the mirror and tried to style his hair. He was nervous, and no matter what he did, his hair didn’t want to cooperate with him this morning. He had dark hair and lots of it, with a funky haircut that Amber loved to run her hands through. He looked at his brown eyes and tried to see what Amber saw when she called them “glowing.” All he could see was the scar above his left eyebrow, which he got when he fell on the half pipe eight years ago. He always figured that scar made him look a bit tough, and he liked it.
The past year, he had grown a lot. He was taller and broader-chested than his father now, and as he looked at himself in the mirror, he decided that he was good-looking, even with rebellious hair. He brushed his teeth and put on deodorant before he walked out of the bathroom.
He had a feeling that today would be a historic day for him. Chances were that this day would be the day that he and Amber would make love for the first time. They had talked about it for months and spent the whole summer texting back and forth about it. He had bought condoms two weeks ago and practiced putting them on. He wanted Amber to be his first, and knew she felt the same way about him. They had been kissing and hanging out at her house after school while her mom was at work. They actually managed to do some homework, but they always ended up kissing and cuddling. For Benjamin, it was the highlight of his day, his week, and basically his year. Every second he spent kissing Amber made sense. It was so effortless and natural, and yesterday he had told her face to face that he really wanted to make love to her. Somehow, writing it in messages was easier. Saying it had been difficult; he was so afraid that she would feel pressured and get mad at him. But Amber had smiled and answered. “I know. Me, too.”
Today, he was bringing the condoms and hoping that it would actually happen. He was sixteen and felt like a walking bunch of hormones; Amber was constantly on his mind. He had made love to her a thousand times in his mind, and right now, the seven hours of school that he had to endure before he could be alone with her felt like an eternity.
* * * * *
Amber had butterflies in her stomach. She looked at the clock above the door. Her focus was not on the kind of biology the teacher was talking about. Her thoughts had moved on to Benjamin and her, and she felt nervous. She had read so many novels and even talked to an old friend about her first time, and now she felt ready to open the door to this next chapter of her life. Being with Benjamin felt so good, and it made every part of her body want to make love to him. She trusted him completely and felt no doubt that he would respect her boundaries and stop if she asked him to. Tomorrow, when I come to school, I will no longer be a virgin, she thought and closed her eyes, thinking of how it would feel to be with Benjamin.
After school, they walked home to Amber’s house. For the first time, Benjamin wasn’t a chatterbox and Amber could tell that he was just as nervous as she was. She, too, found it hard to talk about mundane things, so they walked in silence, exchanging looks, as if to say, “Are we really going to do this?”
Benjamin closed the door behind him and locked it. When he turned around, Amber was already sitting on her bed. He took a deep breath and walked towards her. Amber looked at him, as he sat down next to her. She turned her head and kissed him and could feel how stiff and tense he was. She felt the same way and figured it was the pressure of expectations.
They kissed, but for the first time Amber didn’t feel turned on by it. His tongue was too aggressive in her mouth, like he was trying too hard, and it didn’t feel as natural as it normally did between them. Benjamin took off his shirt and started to pull up Amber’s blouse. She helped him undress both himself and her, and suddenly she felt shy about it. What’s going on? She thought. It feels all different, almost technical and cold.
As she lay naked under her blanket she watched Benjamin sitting on the side of her bed. He had an expression of deep concentration on his face as he opened a condom. Amber lay still and waited, feeling alarms going off in her mind. This was not how it was supposed to feel. What was happening? Where was the humor and desire that normally flowed so effortlessly between them? Benjamin behaved so differently, and she didn’t like it at all. Amber started to wonder how long it was supposed to take to get a condom on. She noticed that Benjamin’s breathing was different. “What’s wrong?” she asked.
Benjamin’s looked down. “I’m sorry, I don’t know what’s going on.” Benjamin’s voice sounded weak and apologetic.
“Can’t you get it on?” Amber asked.
Benjamin was too ashamed to turn his head and look at her. “My erection is gone.” He said very softly. Amber took a deep breath, and she almost felt relief in her body. She wasn’t turned on by the situation anyway, so missing out on sex right now was completely okay with her. She pulled Benjamin down to her and covered him under the blanket.
“Don’t worry about it.” She kissed him. “We have the rest of our lives to make love. It doesn’t have to be today.” Benjamin felt like a complete joke, and all his expectations of having sex were flushed away. He was grateful that Amber wasn’t upset or disappointed with him and turned his head to look at her. “I didn’t p
lan it like this,” he apologized and looked sad.
“Don’t worry, Benjamin.” Amber leaned over and kissed him, and he responded by kissing her back and pulling her close to him. Amber smiled, when she suddenly felt him rise against her stomach. She giggled and looked at him.
“I thought you didn’t feel like playing?”
“Watch me.” Benjamin smiled and made his way down her body, licking and kissing her. Amber’s breathing started to get deeper, and she squirmed as he bit her nipples softly. She closed her eyes and spread her legs enough for Benjamin to get in between them. He looked at her, and she could see love and excitement in his eyes. Her hands went through his hair and she moaned as his mouth reached her inner thighs. She could feel his fingers and his tongue, and it turned her on. This was how it was supposed to feel. With an inviting smile she whispered, “I want you.”
Benjamin returned her smile and kissed her slowly up to her belly. Sitting on his knees in front of her he pulled out a condom and started to put in on. Amber could feel her heart race and admired how beautiful he looked. His crooked smile was sexy, and slowly they merged fingers while keeping eye contact. “Are you ready to do this?” Ben asked with eyes burning from lust and love.
“Yes.” Amber felt more aroused than ever and pushed herself against him as he slowly lifted himself into her. He kept looking at her, searching for signs of discomfort but when she smiled, he surrendered to the mysterious new feeling of being surrounded by her for the first time, and he closed his eyes to savor the moment. He started moving his body slowly, making sure that he wasn’t hurting her.
Amber put her legs around him. The feeling of him inside her was strange. It was painful and wonderful at the same time. The initial pain was replaced by pleasure and made her push against him, signaling that she was enjoying it and wanted him to pick up the pace. “It’s okay, Ben, you are not hurting me – I like it,” she whispered, and it made him pick up the rhythm and look down at her. Amber was a goddess to him, and he soon felt an explosion of ecstasy in his body, and with his eyes closed he moaned, “Oh, Amber, I’m coming.” Amber could feel his body freeze as he emptied himself inside her.
Benjamin’s eyes were shining with awe when he opened them and met hers. “Oh my God, Amber, I love you so much.” He kissed her deeply. “Thank you.”
Amber could feel his warm chest against her breast and how his heart was racing; she smiled back at him and put her arms around his head. “I love you too, Benjamin.” She placed a kiss on his nose.
Benjamin kissed her jaw and bit her ear. “I’m so sorry I couldn’t hold it longer. I promise I’ll do better next time.”
“Don’t worry about it.” Amber smiled. “I’ll take it as a compliment.”
As they lay together, Benjamin couldn’t help smiling. Being with Amber was the best thing that ever happened to him, and having sex with her was his new favorite thing in the world. He was just hoping she felt the same way.
CHAPTER 29
The concert
Jack, Kevin, Joshua, and Dylan were backstage. They could hear the warm-up music playing and were getting ready to go on stage.
Dylan peeked out through the curtain. “This place is packed!”
“Just do as we agreed, okay?” Joshua looked nervous.
“We can totally do this,” Jack said and jumped up and down while stretching.
“Ready?” Joshua asked and put his hand out.
“Ready!” Jack, Dylan, and Kevin put their hands on top of his.
“Rock them hard!” they shouted and raised their hands before they jogged onto the stage.
As soon as the crowd saw them, they started cheering. A few moments later, the guys found themselves lost in the music, and for a moment they forgot about the talent scout and fed on the energy of the audience. This was their best performance by far. Jack was phenomenal on the drums, Kevin and Dylan played awesome solos on the bass and the keyboard, and Joshua was on fire with the microphone and his guitar.
Joshua knew Sara was standing in the audience somewhere, and he felt confident, as he had the crowd singing and clapping along. The energy was amazing, and the band felt the excitement rise for every song they played.
“Thank you guys, you are best the audience in the world. We love you!” Joshua shouted into the microphone. The concert was coming to a close. “This last song is dedicated to one of you girls out there.” Girls were screaming in the audience. “This is for my girlfriend, Sara… I love you!”
Sara was standing in the audience, and she could feel her stomach turn. Oh no, Joshua did not just say that… She looked up at him and knew he couldn’t see her, because he was blinded by the stage lights. She turned around and bumped into Victoria, who could see panic in her eyes. “What’s up?” Victoria asked.
Sara waved her hand in the air, as to say, “I need fresh air.”
“Come on.” Victoria made her way and pulled Sara with her through the crowd.
As soon as they got outside, she turned around and looked at Sara. “What’s going on, Sara?”
Sara started crying. “I don’t know… but I can’t do this.”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s too much for me. I don’t know how to do it right.”
Victoria looked puzzled at Sara. “Could you give me more to go on here? I am not even sure what we are talking about. Come sit here.” Victoria pulled Sara to a bench.
“Joshua declaring his love for me and all.” Sara’s breathing was shallow and quick.
Victoria put a hand of Sara’s shoulder “Slow down, Sara… don’t you love him?”
Sara closed her eyes, trying to calm herself down. “I do!”
“Then what is the problem?” Victoria looked genuinely concerned and confused.
“I want to be his girlfriend, and I want to make him happy, but he is always three steps ahead of me, and I always feel like I disappoint him. Like I don’t know how to be a good girlfriend.” Tears starting falling down Sara’s cheeks.
“I see.” Victoria frowned. “It sounds like you need to talk to him.”
Sara sighed and looked down. “Sometimes I think about breaking up with him because I feel he deserves someone better than me.”
“But he doesn’t want anyone but you, does he?” Victoria asked.
“No, I don’t think so.” Sara had tears in her eyes.
“Okay, listen. Here’s the thing, Sara. I don’t have a lot of experience with guys, so I may not be the expert, but my mom always says this: If you love someone, showing them is better than telling them. If you stop loving someone, telling them is better than showing them.”
Sara stopped crying as she ran Victoria’s words through her head.
“So, I have to show him that I love him?”
“I think so, and maybe you should give yourself some credit, because whatever you are doing seems to be working for him; otherwise I doubt that he would have just told the whole world that he loves you.”
Sara dried her eyes… “Thank you, Vic.”
“My pleasure, sweetie.” Victoria gave Sara a hug, grabbed her arm, and smiled. “Come on, let’s support that crazy-in-love boyfriend of yours.” They went inside to see the audience screaming, stomping and shouting for an extra song.
Sara looked up at Joshua, who held his arm out and silenced the crowd. “Okay, guys, let’s do this.” The drums started beating, and a popular song called “Living Purple” filled the room. The audience was jumping up and down, and everywhere Sara looked, she saw teenage kids singing along. Everyone knew the lyrics. The atmosphere was contagious, and she started jumping along, laughing and singing with Victoria.
At the end of the concert, Joshua, Jack, Dylan, and Kevin all felt like this had been their best concert ever, and they just hoped the talent scout had actually come tonight and witnessed them rock the Old Train Station. They were relieved and excited when Bryan Donnelly from Devine Records came back stage to meet them.
“I like your style.” He looked a
t Joshua. “I was there for the second half. You’re a true star, my friend.” Dylan, Jack, Kevin, and Joshua were high on adrenaline after the concert, and could hardly comprehend that they were actually standing behind the curtain talking to a representative from a big record company.
“I know your fans want to get your autographs, and you should get out there, but I just wanted to let you know that I was impressed by your live performance tonight.”
Joshua shook Bryan’s hand. “Thank you so much. That is awesome.”
“I will talk to my people and call you next week, okay?” Bryan waved as he left them, and he had barely closed the door behind him before the guys started cheering.
“This is epic, dudes.” Kevin pulled his hair. “Tonight was magical, right?”
“Right!” Jack said and felt incredible. “Let’s get out there and meet our fans.”
They took time to sign autographs and take pictures with their fans. In the end, Elizabeth came up and asked to have a picture with the four of them. “Just so I can tell my future kids that I knew you in high school,” she smiled.
Jack was filled with adrenaline from the concert, and he put his arm around Elizabeth as they all posed for the camera. When she turned around to say thank you, he kissed her without even thinking. Elizabeth pulled back and looked at him with an astonished expression on her face. No one else seemed to have noticed; the other guys were already being pulled away by other friends and fans.
“Why did you do that?” she asked with wonder. Jack saw no signs of rejection, only kindness, so he laughed.
“I was just thinking you needed a dad for those future kids of yours.”
Elizabeth burst into laughter and gave him a hug. “Oh my God, Jack, you are hilarious.” He understood that she thought he was making a joke, but he wasn’t, and he needed to know how she felt about him. On a high from giving the concert, he dared to do things he would normally never do, so as she hugged him, he put his arms around her and whispered in her ear, “I am not joking, Elizabeth, I really like you.” For a moment, she didn’t move. They just stood there hugging each other. Finally, she pulled back and looked at him with her head tilted. “You know, Jack, I am very honored that you feel that way.”