I couldn’t be any happier for Cas, he is marrying a good woman tomorrow and has everything he wants but not being able to drink more than two beers and my thigh making me uncomfortable, I just wanted to go home. Now my future at the club is secure, I want to secure my future at home.
“You leavin’ already?” Oak asks, stumbling across the bar towards me.
“Yeah, it isn’t the same sober around you drunk fuckers,” I laugh.
“I just wanna make sure you’re in a good place, you had me worryin’ earlier with all that leavin’ shit,” he slurs, but being used to his drunken ramblings I pretty much understand him.
“I’m good brother, no need to worry. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
I make my way over to the door and tell a prospect to drive me home. He doesn’t look happy to be ripped from the party but I don’t give a shit. The sooner he gets me home the better and the sooner he’ll be back.
The ride back is quiet and uneventful which is all I ask for at the moment. The house is in darkness apart from the porch shining bright into the dark night’s sky. The prospect leaves as I lock the door behind me and head straight for the stairs. They’re the biggest obstacle I face on a daily basis but knowing where I am headed takes the edge of the pain when I put pressure on my leg.
Checking in on Zach I find him out for the count and peaceful in his cot. I close the door and limp my way quietly to the room I share with Kristen.
The sight of her sleeping curled up on my side of the bed with her hair draped across the pillow behind her sends shivers down my spine. No scene will ever beat it.
I sit on the edge of the bed and run my fingers down her bare arm, she fidgets at my touch and settles back into a fruitful sleep. I caress her arm again and this time her eyes flicker open, her sleepy smile seeing me back is fucking beautiful.
“Hey, what time is it?” she asks.
“A little after midnight.”
“I wasn’t expecting you back yet, how was your night?”
“It was good, how was Nemo?” I chuckle.
“Fishy,” she laughs, “I think I could recite the whole movie the amount of times I’ve seen it now.”
“So do I,” I agree.
“You’re still wearing your cut,” she points out.
Kristen knew about my demons I had been struggling with all week, she was the only one I could talk to before I saw my brothers tonight.
“Everything is sorted now, I’m good with the club and not going anywhere.”
“Good, so come to bed already,” she purrs into the pillow.
“I have a question for you,” I say.
“It sounds serious,” she says, giving me her whole attention.
“It is and it isn’t,” I disagree, “Don’t interrupt me until I’m finished okay.”
She nods and sits up, moving closer so she can hold my hand. I look down at our fingers entwined and squeeze slightly just to make sure my hand really does hold the love of my life in it. It does.
“Everything we’ve done together has been at our pace, fast. I have waited for you for longer than you know and now I have you in my life and in my bed, I don’t ever want to be without you again. You are my vision of pure, kind, strong and feisty. You are mine, will you marry me and make it official?”
Her breath catches and her eyes widens.
“I’m not talking about straight away, but someday, whenever you want. As long as I have one ring on your finger I’ll be happy,” I add.
“Yes,” she barely says it out loud but I heard it crystal fucking clear, “Do you have a ring?” she giggles, sceptically.
“Ah, not yet but the day after tomorrow you will, I kind of didn’t think that bit through,” I admit.
“It doesn’t matter. I wouldn’t feel comfortable showing a ring off at Alannah’s wedding, it’s her day tomorrow.” she smiles.
I kiss her fourth finger on her left hand and promise her the fucking world.
Smoothing her hair down as she falls asleep has become my favourite time of day. Between the revelation at the club and Kristen coming into my life, nothing can ever be the same again. It has been a long time getting here but I finally have everything I wanted and not my reckless and nearly deathly decisions will come between us again. I bet my fucking life on it.
Chapter Twenty
Cas
Within twenty-four hours the club was healing and no one was leaving. Slade had shook us all up with his hesitation over his future with us. His leg and Pope’s stomach wound are also healing smoothly. Looking back to the night at Hunter’s warehouse, I can see the decision to withhold the truth was wrong but at the time it was needed to move forward.
None of us had expected Kitty to be the one who was trying her hardest to rip the club apart. Her grief had turned her into someone I barely recognized. If she had been a guy I would have shot her long before Slade stepped in her way.
Alannah had stepped up and took a hard decision away from us. Her quick thinking of taking Slade down and out the way and shooting Kitty came naturally to her. Her actions in the past make her think differently now and the guilt she has for Billy has made her sharper.
In our world, having an old lady who understands the difference between outright murder and defending a life is hard to find. That’s why I am standing here in a button down, crisp white shirt and black trousers. My hair in place and the stubble I had been sporting cleanly shaved off. I had told Lana under no circumstances would I be caught wearing a suit jacket but when it comes to her there isn’t anything I won’t do for her. She infuriates me most of the time with her independence and her wicked mouth and her incessant need to go against everything I say but when it comes down to the important shit, I’m the one she comes to and depends on.
Slipping the jacket on I had to admit I was looking forward to watching Lana’s face when she saw me in it, she doesn’t know I changed my mind about it.
The bar is empty as I walk out, everyone already at the small church. My brothers had wanted to ride with me but I refused them. One, because if they hung around the bar much longer God knows who would actually make it sober enough to ride and secondly, because I wanted some time on my own.
I have a lot to reflect on today. The night I took Danni to bed instead of Alannah nearly destroyed us. The night she nearly died at the hands of Hunter nearly destroyed me but the night she accepted my proposal destroyed anything I had to let her slip through my fingers. Alannah Blake is mine with or without a ring, today is just to make it official and for everyone to see how fucking lucky I am.
I expected nothing less when I pulled up to the church. Bikes, trucks and cars are parked in every space possible and out on the street.
My brothers, their old ladies and their kids were milling around everywhere. Since I proposed to her I haven’t suffered from nerves, but swinging off my bike my heart begins to thud and I feel like I want to vomit in the fucking rose bushes. Alannah wanted the big white wedding and that’s what I gave her. I told myself getting wed in a church would be fine. My biological mother dumping me on a church doorstep has always made me blanch from attending, not that I am a believer.
“Cas, you look sick brother,” Sparky laughs, walking towards me, “You ain’t having seconds thoughts are you?”
“Fuck you,” I spit and grab for my smokes.
“You’re gonna be fine, you may have lost your mom the last time you were near a church but this time, you’ll be leavin’ with your wife,” he offers.
Sparky is my best friend and he’s the only one who knows my whole background and how I was brought into this world.
“I know, it’s the only reason I’m goin’ in.” I tell him, reminding myself at the same time.
I hadn’t realised I had drained my cigarette so I light up another and as I drain this one too, I begin to relax a little.
“It’s nearly time, brother,” he reminds me, pulling at his shirt collar.
“Is it annoying you as much as it is me?” I ask, l
aughing at his discomfort.
“Hell yeah, as soon as this is over it’s comin’ off,” he grumbles, “I have to say, I’m shocked as shit to see you in a jacket, I thought that was a no go for you?”
“I’m only doing this once and it’s for her.”
“Come on, let’s get you in there.”
I take a deep breath and follow him through the guests still standing around outside and into the church which is packed. Every seat is filled and people are standing along the sides.
As soon as they all see me, cheers and whistles fill the church. The preacher approaches me as I head to the alter looking apprehensive around his crowd today.
I wasn’t comfortable with his opinion of family and he wasn’t comfortable with mine, but for today neither of us had a choice.
“We have about five minutes before she arrives, if you can take your place with me,” he says, gesturing towards the alter.
Sparky is my best man and I make sure he is behind me.
“You have the rings don’t you?” I ask, making sure.
“As if I would dare lose them,” he laughs.
“Bonnie looked after them till today didn’t she?” I tease.
“Prez, your doubt wounds me…”
He’s cut off by loud cheering coming in from outside and a few wolf-whistles that grate on my jealous tendencies.
“It sounds like she’s here,” Sparky adds.
The thudding in my chest escalates but not from nerves, this is from pure anticipation.
The entry to the church clears and within seconds Oak is half filling the doorway. In the next breath Lana is reaching to slide her arm through his. As she comes round the door and into view, she knocks the breath out of me. I ball my hands into fists and flex sending jolts of pressure up my arms just to make sure this is real.
She hasn’t seen me yet as she’s busy smiling at everyone in the congregation. Her long blonde hair is all pinned up leaving her beautiful face clear for me to see. Her dress clings fittingly around her sexy as body and pools around her feet. Everything about her is simple yet too much in her natural beauty.
“Breathe brother,” Sparky whispers, bumping into my shoulder with his.
When her eyes meet mine the world falls away. Her eyes are smiling as well as her mouth when she notices my jacket. Her chest is raising as fast as mine feels and her pace fastens.
Oak places a soft kiss on her cheek and hugs her before he places her hand in mine.
“I thought you weren’t going to wear the jacket, it was your cut all the way?” she beams.
I release her hand and undo the two buttons on the jacket. I half shrug out of it to show I am wearing my cut proudly underneath. Laughter fills the church and I shrug it back on my shoulders.
“Perfect,” she murmurs.
The ceremony was short and sweet but everything we needed. Alannah is now a Jackson and she is officially mine.
We barely made it out of the church without injury from slaps on the back in congratulations. I couldn’t give a fuck what tradition is, as soon as we were in sight of my bike I kept hold of her hand and near enough dragged her to it. After making sure her dress was bunched up and was definitely not going to get tangled in the engine, I drove away from the fucking church and from everyone shouting after us.
Squeezing her arms tight around my waist and pressing her thighs into mine drove me crazy on a normal day but today I was going into overdrive with need for her.
We soon arrived at the club and before she could say a word I had her in my arms and in my office.
“I’m not goin’ to fuck you here, I want to do this properly and when I fuck you for the first time as my wife it will be in our home and in our bed,” I tell her, “I just wanted some time with you before this day gets even crazier.”
“You have me whenever and wherever.”
“Always,” I promise.
“I actually wanted some time with you too,” she smiles, lifting her dress up her thigh.
“If you keep pulling that dress up I won’t be able to help myself,” I growl.
“Hush, I have a wedding present for you.”
I take a step back and watch what she’s up to. She reveals her leg as far up as the garter she’s wearing is sitting around her thigh.
Whatever is attached to it she hides pretty well until she places it in my hand and lets go of it.
I can and can’t believe what I am seeing.
“You’re going to be a daddy,” she laughs.
A husband and a dad all in one day, I can’t even begin to process this. I mean I knew it could be a possibility at any time because over the last three months I have been blowing my load straight up her.
“You’re happy aren’t you?” she asks, unsure when I remain tight lipped.
I finally look at her and see the worry forming around her eyes.
“I’m fuckin’ elated Lana,” I assure her, and scoop her back into my arms.
I show how much she has made me happy as I claim her lips for the second time as man and wife.
It’s so tempting to take her now in my office, but with my kid growing in her stomach I want to do this properly even more.
“You’re gonna hate me before this kid is born,” I pant, releasing her mouth.
“Why?” she frowns.
“Because if you thought I took your safety to extreme before, this shit right here,” I say, waving the test in front of her, “This has taken it to levels you never knew existed babe.”
She giggles and pulls me back into her.
“I can handle you Cas Jackson.”
“That’s real good because I fuckin’ struggle to handle you Mrs Jackson.”
Sparky
Barbie had done Cas proud today. The ceremony was perfectly fitted to the couple and she has outdone herself with the reception. She has transformed the unused land behind the clubhouse into party fucking central. Marquees and tables full of food are everywhere. There is even two bars overstocked with booze without fear of running dry. I wasn’t surprised Cas had Barbie away from the church faster than a rat up a drainpipe but his reaction as she walked up the aisle is what marriages are made from.
After making sure everyone had made it from the church to the club, I tracked down my own wife.
I found her talking with Kristen with her back to me, I knew her ass anywhere. Slipping my arms around her waist from behind, she lets her head fall back on my chest.
“I was wondering if I was going to see you again today,” she laughs.
“Like I’d let you get away.”
“I’m going to find Slade and Zachery,” Kristen quickly mumbles, before fleeing.
“You didn’t have to scare her away,” Bon scolds playfully, twisting round in my arms.
“I didn’t do anything but now I have you to myself and JJ is sleeping,” I say, looking down at my son is his stroller, “I can finally do this.”
I lift her chin higher and lean down to kiss her. I’m happy for my brother today but this right here in my arms…is my world.
A kiss with Bonnie is simply never enough.
“I’m lovin’ this dress you’re wearin’,” I remark on the barely there cloth that thankfully covers her body from her shoulders to her feet. There is just too many asses to kick for looking at her here today, not that I wouldn’t try.
“You’re not looking so bad yourself, I see you got rid of the shirt though.”
“Damn right.”
“Do you ever regret getting married?” she asks, out of the blue.
“The only thing I regret is the shit I put you through before I married you. JJ being born, you marryin’ me and all we have means everything to me Bon. Where’s this coming from?”
“I don’t know,” she sighs, “I suppose this wedding has me thinking all sorts,” she admits.
“Well stop, don’t think about nothin’ but me,” I grin, “I’ll go and get us a drink and I’ll meet you at the table.”
I kiss her again
before she walks away. Shaking her worries out of my head I push my way through the crowd to get to the bar.
I was ten seconds away from shooting the next person who asked me where Cas and Barbie were when they finally dragged their asses from wherever Cas had whooped her away to.
Now Cas is back in familiar territory he is happier and more relaxed. Meeting my son for the first time in the hospital when he was born, I couldn’t fathom how Cas’s mom could abandon him. Fucking hell, I can’t imagine what it is like not to know the simplest thing like her name. I grew up without a mom, but I at least knew her name to track her down.
“To our president and his beautiful bride,” Oak yells, as he sees them arrive. Everyone toasts the newlyweds and the party really begins.
Cas isn’t able to join us until he has had the photos done with Alannah and made his rounds greeting his guests.
Once he is finally finished he slumps into a chair at our table and unbuttons his shirt.
“Today is more tiring than runnin’ a fuckin’ club,” he exaggerates.
“You love it,” Slade teases him.
“Yeah, you looked in your element posing for the camera,” I add, the table erupts into laughter at his expense.
“I don’t know what you’re all laughing for, she wants a group photo next. That means all you fuckers without complainin’.” He smiles, wickedly.
The laughter falls quiet and turns to groans.
“Whatever she tells you to do, do it,” he warns, “If I have to bear it, so do you.”
As the sun begins to set, true to her word, Alannah rounds us all up for a club photo.
With Cas’s warning still fresh in our memory, everyone complies. Shots of brothers in arms are taken. Shots of only Lost Souls and shots of Lost Souls and Devils Bastards together are taken and the one I like most is when JJ and Zach are brought in and had their photos taken with the men. I will later look back on this moment and remember everything I stand for. Family…whether blood or brother. My past, the good times and we all share…our future.