“Dad?”
I blinked until I was in focus to see Ava waving her hand in my face.
“Wedding talk boring you already?” she laughed.
“Of course not. I was just thinking what I should get you for your wedding gift”
Of course she saw straight through the lie, but it was something I would have to think of soon, if she were going to be married soon.
“Okay, well we are getting ready to leave now” she said.
“Okay, I will meet you outside, I’ll settle up here first, my treat” I told everyone.
“I’ll pay, it might be my last chance to” Alex said, getting his card out of his wallet.
“What the fuck is going on with you? And why are you not going home with Nat?” I asked again, as everyone made their way outside.
“Let me pay, then I’ll tell you in the car”
I sighed in frustration and left him to pay. I said good-bye to my mother and Henry, Nat was pulling away by the time I went to say good-bye to her.
“Do you know what is going on with Nat?” I asked Ava.
“No, but I don’t think it is good between her and Uncle Alex” she said.
“I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about” I lied, “Here, give me a hug before you go”
“Don’t feel like you are losing me, I am not going anywhere,” she said quietly into my jacket.
Her reassuring words reminded me of Jas, there was no doubt, that even if I wanted to be rid of memories of Jas, I could with Ava around, they were so alike.
“Hey, don’t you be worrying about me! Believe me, I am happy for you, both of you” I told her.
“Good, I’ll always need you dad”
“Always” I agreed, “Go on and get yourselves home. Drive safely Layton” I warned.
“I will, and thank you Chris,” he said taking Ava’s hand, together walking to their car.
I will never admit it to him personally, but he isn’t so bad. I don’t fully trust him with my daughter, but as far as son-in-law’s go, I could have worse.
A hand slapping me on my shoulder made me jump.
“Christ, don’t do that” I snapped.
“Sorry” Alex said, holding his hands up in surrender.
“Ava is safely driving away, now get in the car and tell me what the hell is going on, because I have had enough of tonight”
I wasn’t parked far, Alex was trying to slow his pace but it didn’t work, we were soon belted in and driving away.
“So…?” I started.
“I thought I knew what I was doing, that I could keep it under control…but now I have lost everything”
He was stalling, I knew him too well.
“Just spit it out”
“Natalie has kicked me out because she found out I have been having an affair” he said quickly.
What? He was lucky I was driving and had to concentrate, no wonder he wanted to wait until I was driving.
“Since when?” I asked.
“Since last July” he sighed.
“A year? You have been cheating on Nat for a year? How? Who with?” I asked, trying to make sense of what I was hearing.
Alex and Nat are for life, they are the couple everyone envied, everyone wants what they have, what I thought was the perfect family.
“Do you remember Jane? We built the Garages…” he trailed off.
Oh my god, this was far worse. I remember her, how could I forget? She first had her sights set on me, it didn’t take long for her to realise I was not interested in the slightest. She was a typical bored housewife, with too much money and not enough attention from her husband. Over the weeks we worked there, any of my guys could have had her, now I find out, my stupid, stupid brother went there.
“You threw everything away for that?” I said, disgusted by his actions.
“You make her sound like a…”
“Like a what? Like an easy lay? Like she tried sleeping with all the guys working that job? Fucking hell bro, have some standards”
“She isn’t like that,” he said, defending her, “I knew you would be like this”
I stole a quick glance at him before returning to the road. That was it, he wasn’t withdrawn because he wanted to make amends with Nat, he was withdrawn because he knew he wouldn’t be able to tell me the truth without receiving the backlash I would give him.
“Defending her, must be love,” I muttered sarcastically.
“I don’t know what it is” he replied.
“What the hell does that mean? Is it still going on?”
“I don’t know, I don’t know what is going on”
Why is he doing this? Never have I heard him talk about being unhappy in his marriage. All these years, we have been close, usually talking about whatever is on our minds. Feeling like I didn’t know who my brother was at all, the rage I harboured within was difficult to retain. I held off stopping the car all the way home, but as soon as I was parked in the drive, I was out of the car and waiting for him.
He is my brother, we are meant to stick together in every wrong decision we make, always knowing we have each other’s backs, but I cannot and will not condone this line he has crossed.
He had it all, the perfect life, a beautiful wife who loves him, two wonderful children, the nice home, enough money to be content forever, everything!
“How could you do this?” I asked, when he came walking around the car.
“If I am honest, I was bored, Jane is nothing like Nat, she is different”
He caused this pain because of boredom? Before I could stop myself, my fingers clenched into a fist and I swung for him.
He fell to the floor, holding his jaw. By the unsurprised look on his face, he was expecting it.
“You make me sick! You had everything, Nat loves you, she would do anything for you” I shouted at him.
“I knew you wouldn’t understand,” he said, wiping his bloody lip.
“What is there to understand? You’re married, you have been having an affair behind your wife’s back. You have thrown it all away for a lonely slag”
“What do you know what I have thrown away, Nat and I have been having troubles for a while…”
“So, you work at them then!” I argued.
I wasn’t letting him get away with these pathetic excuses.
“Work at what? It takes two to make things work and she hasn’t been trying either,” he said, standing back on his feet.
“I’m not surprised she didn’t want to work at it if she had an inkling as to what was going on. Do you know how lucky you are to have what you do?” I said.
“You know what, were not you and Jas, we haven’t got that perfect, nothing matters in the world because were in love, but I’m dying, so everyone has to run around to make us happy kind of relationship” he spat at me.
The venom in his voice took my breath away.
“It wasn’t like that,” I mumbled.
“Yes it was. No one can ever live up to your standards, Chris Jenson, perfect son, falls in love with the perfect girl and ended with the perfect tragedy. Do you honestly believe your love would have survived to this day if she hadn’t of died?”
“Shut up” I warned.
“Why, because you don’t like what your hearing? It isn’t perfect enough for you? Your wife died, mine has nothing to do with you and she isn’t perfect and neither was Jasmine. Your love for her blinded you from seeing her for the lying, selfish bitch she was, you let her shit all over you back then and you still do to this day. She used you to make her last days bearable”
In time I may regret my next move, but right now, this needed to be resolved in our own way. He stood his ground and waited, he knew what was coming.
I rushed into him, forcing him to the ground. No way was he tainting my marriage just because he had fucked up his own. He grabbed at my neck, which gave me the opening I needed for the first punch, it landed in the same place as earlier, causing more blood to ooze from his lip. I punched him
again catching him above his cheekbone before he pushed me away, I fell to the side of him, as soon as he was free he was on me, venting his pent up issues towards me. I took three blows to my face before I got the upper hand and threw him off me.
“You went too far bringing Jas into this” I warned him, making my way to my feet, the same as him.
He stood and laughed, the sound set me off again.
“She has always been in it, you’re a joke to believe any different. Everyone pandering to you, making sure Chris is okay, ah poor Chris, his wife died you know, blah blah blah”
This time we rushed each other, in a weird way it felt good.
As we both scrambled to gain a hold on the other, throwing wild punches, trying to connect with whatever part of the body we could get too, headlights drove up the driveway. I couldn’t give a fuck though, this was getting resolved tonight.
“Whatever you think about me…you fucked up your own marriage,” I said, releasing my hold on him slightly.
He took advantage and swung his fist up through the opening, it connected above my left eye, the disorientation had me stumbling back, it was going too far now.
“Christopher…Alexander!”
I threw a right hook and caught him on his right eye, if I were going to have a black so was he.
The next minute or so became a blur, the pent up emotions surfaced and they weren’t ready to be resolved.
“Stop!” It was our mother.
What she was doing here I don’t know, but out of respect for her, I stepped back in surrender and in turn so did Alex. It doesn’t matter how old we get, even now in our forties, we will always have respect for our mother.
Covered in blood and forming bruises, I knew what we looked like by the horror on her face, looking upon the scene before her.
“What are you doing here?” I shouted out over the engine running, as she and Henry came walking towards us.
“I knew this wasn’t a good idea,” she stated firmly.
Then it twigged, “You knew, you knew and you didn’t tell me”
“Of course I know, I am his mother, he came to me yesterday. If I thought it would have gotten this out of hand, I would have taken him home with me”
“I’m a grown man and I am standing right here” Alex said, wiping the blood away from his eye.
“Yes, you are a man, a man I thought I had raised not to be cruel and treat women like this, I guess I failed” she said sadly, “And now look at yourselves, fighting each other, you are all you have” I cut her off.
“You’re wrong, I have more than him, get him out of here” I told them.
I wasn’t sorry for the things I had said or the violence towards him tonight, he deserved it, he is my brother and always will be, but at the moment just to look at him makes me feel anger like I never wanted to feel again. I guess he felt the same because he couldn’t look at me or say a word, let alone an apology.
“Chris…” Henry said.
Henry never usually got involved but every now and then he would put his bit of advice in. Tonight I didn’t want to hear a word of it.
“I am being serious, get him out of here”
“Don’t worry, I’m going” Alex said, brushing past me.
Until now, I hadn’t seen how tired my mother looked, she is constantly alert with us all, smiling, making the best out of every situation, tonight though she just looked old and tired. The only part I am sorry for tonight is making my mother see this.
Henry walked back to the car with Alex, as she came towards me. Her pained expression told me she didn’t know whether to stay and clean me up or leave with Alex. I took the decision from her and told her to go home.
“How can I leave you like this?” she asked.
“Because I will be fine mum, you need to go home and get some sleep, it has been a long day. I promise the only thing I’m going to do is clean myself up and go to bed”
“Come and see me tomorrow” she urged.
“Of course” I lied.
I didn’t trust myself to walk her to the car, I couldn’t trust myself to get too close to Alex. All this pain he is causing because he wants to act like a teenager with no responsibilities.
I sat on the porch steps as they drove away. As I got my head together, tonight’s events looped through my mind on repeat. Just because he is my blood doesn’t mean I will laugh and joke with him over this. How can he be so easy going about it, it isn’t just Nat he has to concern himself about but Jack and Jasmine-Lily too. I felt so sorry for Nat, my heart broke for her, to be betrayed like this after being together for so long is unimaginable. Hopefully some of the punches he received tonight would knock some sense back into his head.
As for myself, tonight had opened a whole new issue, to hear that is how Alex has been feeling all these years hurt. Since Ava came into my life, I have tried my best to keep my ever-lasting grief to myself, to not let my grief affect everyone else’s lives. I love my family more than anything, I would not have survived losing Jas without them, but I never wanted them to harbour ill will against me for it, especially my brother.
The adrenaline was beginning to wear off, and the pain from cuts and bruises were beginning to hurt. I was exhausted, all I wanted was to have a drink and sit down in a comfy chair.
For the first time since Ava moved out I was glad she wasn’t here, not to see me like this. I sat on the sofa and closed my eyes, well, one eye had rapidly swollen shut already. I couldn’t help noticing that every time something good occurred in my life, trouble followed, I would have thought I would be used to it by now, but each time it still knocked me down. Remembering what Alex said tonight, I was angry to think people thought that of me, that I needed their pity. I couldn’t help it that the woman I fell in love with died and I still struggle without her fifteen years later. I can’t shut her out of my life. I over analysed tonight’s events until I fell asleep, still on the sofa.
“Dad! Are you still here?” I heard Ava shouting from the other room.
I don’t recall drinking excess amounts of alcohol last night to cause me to struggle opening my eyes. I must have fallen asleep on the sofa, my entire body was stiff and ached everywhere.
“Oh my god, what happened to you?” she asked frantically, finding me in the living room. Oh yeah, my fight with Alex last night, I remembered now, it wasn’t from drinking too much.
Finally able to move now, I saw Ava beginning to panic. I moved forward to show her I was fine, all she could see was damage on the surface, not that I was fine, it would take more than my little brother to damage me.
“I’m fine, stop worrying”
She snorted, there was no way she was going to let this go without an explanation.
“How and when did this happen? I was with you till late last night. Oh my god, were you mugged?”
I had to tell her what happened before she continued to make her own assumptions.
“Not to say I am not happy to see you, but what are you doing here this early?” I asked, prolonging my explanation.
“I got a phone call from Nat at the crack of dawn, drunk, I came to see if it was true” she said before adding, “Anyway, tell me what happened before I hunt my uncle down” she finished.
Man, she is really angry with him already, what I had to say wasn’t going to go down well.
“How is she?” I asked first.
“Not good, she is broken. What scared me the most is she didn’t cry”
“That’s good isn’t it?”
She shrugged her shoulders in response.
“So you know what I’m talking about then?”
“Yes, I found out last night. That is what this is about” I said, pointing to the bruises.
“He did this to you?” she asked in shock and disgust.
“To be fair, he most likely looks the same,”
“Good, he deserves it. I can’t believe he has done this”
I have never heard her condone violence before, she was the comp
lete opposite, her and Megan’s youth centre was proof of that. She must be very angry with Alex right now.
“Me either, I will go and see Nat later, make sure she is okay”
“She will appreciate that, that’s if she is sober enough to know your there” she frowned, “Now, let’s get you cleaned up,” she said, looking towards the stairs.
“He isn’t here, he left with your Gran last night” I informed her.
“What was she doing here? I thought she left to go home from the restaurant.”
“Come on, I’ll explain while I get a coffee” I said, standing up.
I was getting too old to be getting into fights and sleeping on the sofa, today was going to be hell to get through, I feel like crap.
While I explained last night’s events, she sat listening in silence. Family meant just as much to Ava as it does me, and with the latest revelations, I don’t know if our family will be the same again.
She couldn’t stay for long as she had to get to work, she promised she would stay out of it, let Alex and Nat work through whatever they have to. I didn’t believe for one second she would, her and Nat are so close, she will take this personally.
Once I was ready, I decided to stop by Nat’s before work. I don’t think Alex will have the nerve to show up this morning, if anything I think our mother will keep him away for the time being. I doubt Nat would have gone to work today either, and I was right, her car was still parked out front when I arrived.
I let myself in through the back door.
“Nat” I yelled out.
Jack and Jasmine-Lily must be at school and there was no sign of Rose.
“Nat” I called out again, throwing my keys on the kitchen counter.
“In here” she shouted.
I followed her voice to the living room. She was lying under a blanket on the sofa, from the empty glasses and the three empty bottles of wine, I assumed she wouldn’t be able to move for a while longer. I may have bruises covering most of my face, but she looked just as bad as me. She must have been non-stop crying all night. When she saw my face she jumped straight up.
“What the hell happened to you?” she screeched.
“Don’t worry about that, I came to make sure you’re okay,” I said, taking a seat next to her.