CHAPTER 7
Half a minute conducted them through the pump-yard to the archway,opposite Union Passage; but here they were stopped. Everybody acquaintedwith Bath may remember the difficulties of crossing Cheap Street atthis point; it is indeed a street of so impertinent a nature, sounfortunately connected with the great London and Oxford roads, and theprincipal inn of the city, that a day never passes in which parties ofladies, however important their business, whether in quest of pastry,millinery, or even (as in the present case) of young men, are notdetained on one side or other by carriages, horsemen, or carts. Thisevil had been felt and lamented, at least three times a day, by Isabellasince her residence in Bath; and she was now fated to feel and lament itonce more, for at the very moment of coming opposite to Union Passage,and within view of the two gentlemen who were proceeding through thecrowds, and threading the gutters of that interesting alley, theywere prevented crossing by the approach of a gig, driven along on badpavement by a most knowing-looking coachman with all the vehemence thatcould most fitly endanger the lives of himself, his companion, and hishorse.
Oh, these odious gigs! said Isabella, looking up. How I detest them.But this detestation, though so just, was of short duration, for shelooked again and exclaimed, Delightful! Mr. Morland and my brother!
Good heaven! 'Tis James! was uttered at the same moment by Catherine;and, on catching the young men's eyes, the horse was immediately checkedwith a violence which almost threw him on his haunches, and the servanthaving now scampered up, the gentlemen jumped out, and the equipage wasdelivered to his care.
Catherine, by whom this meeting was wholly unexpected, received herbrother with the liveliest pleasure; and he, being of a very amiabledisposition, and sincerely attached to her, gave every proof on hisside of equal satisfaction, which he could have leisure to do, while thebright eyes of Miss Thorpe were incessantly challenging his notice;and to her his devoirs were speedily paid, with a mixture of joy andembarrassment which might have informed Catherine, had she been moreexpert in the development of other people's feelings, and less simplyengrossed by her own, that her brother thought her friend quite aspretty as she could do herself.
John Thorpe, who in the meantime had been giving orders about thehorses, soon joined them, and from him she directly received the amendswhich were her due; for while he slightly and carelessly touched thehand of Isabella, on her he bestowed a whole scrape and half a shortbow. He was a stout young man of middling height, who, with a plain faceand ungraceful form, seemed fearful of being too handsome unless he worethe dress of a groom, and too much like a gentleman unless he were easywhere he ought to be civil, and impudent where he might be allowed to beeasy. He took out his watch: How long do you think we have been runningit from Tetbury, Miss Morland?
I do not know the distance. Her brother told her that it wastwenty-three miles.
Three and twenty! cried Thorpe. Five and twenty if it is an inch.Morland remonstrated, pleaded the authority of road-books, innkeepers,and milestones; but his friend disregarded them all; he had a surer testof distance. I know it must be five and twenty, said he, by the timewe have been doing it. It is now half after one; we drove out of theinn-yard at Tetbury as the town clock struck eleven; and I defy any manin England to make my horse go less than ten miles an hour in harness;that makes it exactly twenty-five.
You have lost an hour, said Morland; it was only ten o'clock when wecame from Tetbury.
Ten o'clock! It was eleven, upon my soul! I counted every stroke. Thisbrother of yours would persuade me out of my senses, Miss Morland; dobut look at my horse; did you ever see an animal so made for speed inyour life? (The servant had just mounted the carriage and was drivingoff.) Such true blood! Three hours and and a half indeed coming onlythree and twenty miles! Look at that creature, and suppose it possibleif you can.
He does look very hot, to be sure.
Hot! He had not turned a hair till we came to Walcot Church; but lookat his forehand; look at his loins; only see how he moves; that horsecannot go less than ten miles an hour: tie his legs and he will get on.What do you think of my gig, Miss Morland? A neat one, is not it?Well hung; town-built; I have not had it a month. It was built for aChristchurch man, a friend of mine, a very good sort of fellow; he ranit a few weeks, till, I believe, it was convenient to have done with it.I happened just then to be looking out for some light thing of the kind,though I had pretty well determined on a curricle too; but I chanced tomeet him on Magdalen Bridge, as he was driving into Oxford, last term:'Ah! Thorpe,' said he, 'do you happen to want such a little thing asthis? It is a capital one of the kind, but I am cursed tired of it.''Oh! D--,' said I; 'I am your man; what do you ask?' And how much do youthink he did, Miss Morland?
I am sure I cannot guess at all.
Curricle-hung, you see; seat, trunk, sword-case, splashing-board,lamps, silver moulding, all you see complete; the iron-work as goodas new, or better. He asked fifty guineas; I closed with him directly,threw down the money, and the carriage was mine.
And I am sure, said Catherine, I know so little of such things that Icannot judge whether it was cheap or dear.
Neither one nor t'other; I might have got it for less, I dare say; butI hate haggling, and poor Freeman wanted cash.
That was very good-natured of you, said Catherine, quite pleased.
Oh! D---- it, when one has the means of doing a kind thing by a friend,I hate to be pitiful.
An inquiry now took place into the intended movements of the youngladies; and, on finding whither they were going, it was decided thatthe gentlemen should accompany them to Edgar's Buildings, and pay theirrespects to Mrs. Thorpe. James and Isabella led the way; and sowell satisfied was the latter with her lot, so contentedly was sheendeavouring to ensure a pleasant walk to him who brought the doublerecommendation of being her brother's friend, and her friend's brother,so pure and uncoquettish were her feelings, that, though they overtookand passed the two offending young men in Milsom Street, she was so farfrom seeking to attract their notice, that she looked back at them onlythree times.
John Thorpe kept of course with Catherine, and, after a few minutes'silence, renewed the conversation about his gig. You will find,however, Miss Morland, it would be reckoned a cheap thing by somepeople, for I might have sold it for ten guineas more the next day;Jackson, of Oriel, bid me sixty at once; Morland was with me at thetime.
Yes, said Morland, who overheard this; but you forget that your horsewas included.
My horse! Oh, d---- it! I would not sell my horse for a hundred. Areyou fond of an open carriage, Miss Morland?
Yes, very; I have hardly ever an opportunity of being in one; but I amparticularly fond of it.
I am glad of it; I will drive you out in mine every day.
Thank you, said Catherine, in some distress, from a doubt of thepropriety of accepting such an offer.
I will drive you up Lansdown Hill tomorrow.
Thank you; but will not your horse want rest?
Rest! He has only come three and twenty miles today; all nonsense;nothing ruins horses so much as rest; nothing knocks them up so soon.No, no; I shall exercise mine at the average of four hours every daywhile I am here.
Shall you indeed! said Catherine very seriously. That will be fortymiles a day.
Forty! Aye, fifty, for what I care. Well, I will drive you up Lansdowntomorrow; mind, I am engaged.
How delightful that will be! cried Isabella, turning round. Mydearest Catherine, I quite envy you; but I am afraid, brother, you willnot have room for a third.
A third indeed! No, no; I did not come to Bath to drive my sistersabout; that would be a good joke, faith! Morland must take care of you.
This brought on a dialogue of civilities between the other two; butCatherine heard neither the particulars nor the result. Her companion'sdiscourse now sunk from its hitherto animated pitch to nothing more thana short decisive sentence of praise or condemnation on the face of everywoman they met; and Catherine, after listening and agreeing as long asshe could, with all the civility and deference of the youthful femalemind, fearful of hazarding an opinion of its own in opposition to thatof a self-assured man, especially where the beauty of her own sex isconcerned, ventured at length to vary the subject by a question whichhad been long uppermost in her thoughts; it was, Have you ever readUdolpho, Mr. Thorpe?
Udolpho! Oh, Lord! Not I; I never read novels; I have something else todo.
Catherine, humbled and ashamed, was going to apologize for her question,but he prevented her by saying, Novels are all so full of nonsenseand stuff; there has not been a tolerably decent one come out sinceTom Jones, except The Monk; I read that t'other day; but as for all theothers, they are the stupidest things in creation.
I think you must like Udolpho, if you were to read it; it is so veryinteresting.
Not I, faith! No, if I read any, it shall be Mrs. Radcliffe's; hernovels are amusing enough; they are worth reading; some fun and naturein them.
Udolpho was written by Mrs. Radcliffe, said Catherine, with somehesitation, from the fear of mortifying him.
No sure; was it? Aye, I remember, so it was; I was thinking of thatother stupid book, written by that woman they make such a fuss about,she who married the French emigrant.
I suppose you mean Camilla?
Yes, that's the book; such unnatural stuff! An old man playing atsee-saw, I took up the first volume once and looked it over, but I soonfound it would not do; indeed I guessed what sort of stuff it must bebefore I saw it: as soon as I heard she had married an emigrant, I wassure I should never be able to get through it.
I have never read it.
You had no loss, I assure you; it is the horridest nonsense you canimagine; there is nothing in the world in it but an old man's playing atsee-saw and learning Latin; upon my soul there is not.
This critique, the justness of which was unfortunately lost on poorCatherine, brought them to the door of Mrs. Thorpe's lodgings, and thefeelings of the discerning and unprejudiced reader of Camilla gave wayto the feelings of the dutiful and affectionate son, as they met Mrs.Thorpe, who had descried them from above, in the passage. Ah, Mother!How do you do? said he, giving her a hearty shake of the hand. Wheredid you get that quiz of a hat? It makes you look like an old witch.Here is Morland and I come to stay a few days with you, so you must lookout for a couple of good beds somewhere near. And this address seemedto satisfy all the fondest wishes of the mother's heart, for shereceived him with the most delighted and exulting affection. On histwo younger sisters he then bestowed an equal portion of his fraternaltenderness, for he asked each of them how they did, and observed thatthey both looked very ugly.
These manners did not please Catherine; but he was James's friendand Isabella's brother; and her judgment was further bought off byIsabella's assuring her, when they withdrew to see the new hat, thatJohn thought her the most charming girl in the world, and by John'sengaging her before they parted to dance with him that evening. Had shebeen older or vainer, such attacks might have done little; but, whereyouth and diffidence are united, it requires uncommon steadiness ofreason to resist the attraction of being called the most charming girlin the world, and of being so very early engaged as a partner; and theconsequence was that, when the two Morlands, after sitting an hour withthe Thorpes, set off to walk together to Mr. Allen's, and James, asthe door was closed on them, said, Well, Catherine, how do you like myfriend Thorpe? instead of answering, as she probably would have done,had there been no friendship and no flattery in the case, I do not likehim at all, she directly replied, I like him very much; he seems veryagreeable.
He is as good-natured a fellow as ever lived; a little of a rattle; butthat will recommend him to your sex, I believe: and how do you like therest of the family?
Very, very much indeed: Isabella particularly.
I am very glad to hear you say so; she is just the kind of young womanI could wish to see you attached to; she has so much good sense, and isso thoroughly unaffected and amiable; I always wanted you to know her;and she seems very fond of you. She said the highest things in yourpraise that could possibly be; and the praise of such a girl as MissThorpe even you, Catherine, taking her hand with affection, may beproud of.
Indeed I am, she replied; I love her exceedingly, and am delightedto find that you like her too. You hardly mentioned anything of her whenyou wrote to me after your visit there.
Because I thought I should soon see you myself. I hope you will be agreat deal together while you are in Bath. She is a most amiable girl;such a superior understanding! How fond all the family are of her; sheis evidently the general favourite; and how much she must be admired insuch a place as this--is not she?
Yes, very much indeed, I fancy; Mr. Allen thinks her the prettiest girlin Bath.
I dare say he does; and I do not know any man who is a better judge ofbeauty than Mr. Allen. I need not ask you whether you are happy here, mydear Catherine; with such a companion and friend as Isabella Thorpe, itwould be impossible for you to be otherwise; and the Allens, I am sure,are very kind to you?
Yes, very kind; I never was so happy before; and now you are come itwill be more delightful than ever; how good it is of you to come so faron purpose to see me.
James accepted this tribute of gratitude, and qualified his consciencefor accepting it too, by saying with perfect sincerity, Indeed,Catherine, I love you dearly.
Inquiries and communications concerning brothers and sisters, thesituation of some, the growth of the rest, and other family matters nowpassed between them, and continued, with only one small digressionon James's part, in praise of Miss Thorpe, till they reached PulteneyStreet, where he was welcomed with great kindness by Mr. and Mrs. Allen,invited by the former to dine with them, and summoned by the latterto guess the price and weigh the merits of a new muff and tippet.A pre-engagement in Edgar's Buildings prevented his accepting theinvitation of one friend, and obliged him to hurry away as soon as hehad satisfied the demands of the other. The time of the two partiesuniting in the Octagon Room being correctly adjusted, Catherine was thenleft to the luxury of a raised, restless, and frightened imaginationover the pages of Udolpho, lost from all worldly concerns of dressingand dinner, incapable of soothing Mrs. Allen's fears on the delay of anexpected dressmaker, and having only one minute in sixty to bestow evenon the reflection of her own felicity, in being already engaged for theevening.